


The Thug

by Dressed_In_Darkness



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Action, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Angst, Badass!eren, Blow Jobs, Bottom Eren Yeager, Character Death, Eventual Smut, First Time Bottoming, Fluff and Humor, Gay Sex, M/M, Masturbation, POV Eren Yeager, POV First Person, Rimming, Slow Build, Top Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), thug!levi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-04
Updated: 2015-05-27
Packaged: 2018-03-05 08:06:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 35
Words: 134,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3112334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dressed_In_Darkness/pseuds/Dressed_In_Darkness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren Yeager is on an errand when he comes across a girl in the underground city who is being held captive by two men. Putting his life at risk, Eren does anything to save her, relying on nothing but his determination and unwillingness to see her hurt. As they're backed into a corner, they are suddenly saved by none other than Levi Ackerman, the strongest thug in the underground. Eren can't help but feel drawn to him, but will his feelings for this famous criminal wind up getting him hurt?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't going to post this until I finished my last fanfic, but since it's almost at a close, I wanted to give my readers something to look forward to. Also, I wanted to create new friendships with people who will find this story of mine. 
> 
> Since I read A Choice With No Regrets, I've fallen in love with the thug trio. Thinking of Levi as some badass thug just appealed to me so much, that I found myself thinking about this story long before I sat down to write the first chapter. I want this story to be intense. My last fanfic was really fluffy, and in it, Levi is young and adorable. In this fic, that won't be the case. He will be like he is the manga, as will Eren.
> 
> Also, I really suck at summaries (if you couldn't tell by that horrid one up there). 
> 
> So, with all that said, go on and read. :) 
> 
> P.S. (I do these. If you've followed me here from Our Cryptic Love, then you already know) I will reveal their ages throughout chapters.

I don’t know how the girl had managed to get herself into this type of situation, but I couldn’t care about the reasoning. All I cared about was getting her out of harms way. There were two burly men holding her down, shoving her face into a rain puddle. When they pulled her head out, her teeth were bared, green eyes alight with anger.

            “You bastards!” she growled. “I’ll show you! I’ll kill the both of you!” They didn’t let her go on, pushing her head back into the water, drowning out her next string of curses. That’s when I stepped into their line of sight.

            “Let her go,” I demanded, clenching my hands into fists at my sides.   

            One of them looked up at me with beady black eyes, a smirk appearing on his dirty face. “Who the fuck are you, kid? Think you can take on the both of us?”

            “Come on over here and see.”

            It was raining out, the droplets falling onto my face and clothes, drenching me where I stood. I didn’t know how I must’ve looked to them—probably like some thin, stupid kid who couldn’t keep his nose out of their business. But I wasn’t going to let them hurt her. With us being in the part of the city where murders happened every day, I wasn’t going to leave without her in tow.

            The man released her head, coming to a stand. He wiped his dirty hands on the front of his black jeans, smiling as he approached me. He was a lot taller than me, with black hair and oily skin. My eyes locked onto one of his belt loops, where a sheathed pocketknife hung.

            “Listen, kid,” the man drawled, picking his teeth with his index finger as he reached me, "you look young. I don’t feel like messing with some punk today. Why don’t you run back home to your mamma, huh?”

            I took a step closer to him, looking up into his eyes. “I’m not leaving without her.”

            “Do you even know her?” He gestured to the red-haired girl, who was still being restrained by the other man. “She stole from me, kid. Once you do that, there’s no going back. Risking yourself for her is pointless. Even if I let her go, she’s going to come right on back, because she’s a low life.”

            I gritted my teeth. “Don’t talk about her like that! Every life is precious—including hers!”

            “So you don’t know her, then?” he said, shaking his head. “She’s not as innocent as she appears. She runs with some hoodlums who cause nothing but trouble for the poor folks around here.”

            “That’s not true!” the girl shouted. “You’re a monster who steals from the poor! You won’t get away with this! Big Bro will come for me. He always comes for me!”

            The man laughed, throwing his head back in a dramatic fashion. “You’re talking about Levi, aren’t you?”

            My eyes widened at that. I had heard of Levi, the underground thug. I didn’t even live around these parts, but his name got around. He was the strongest thug in the underground. No one messed with him. If he was on his way, these men were going to pay for their actions.

            The girl nodded proudly. “Big Bro is probably already on his way.”

            “Doubt that,” the man said. “We were watching you. You snuck out. He doesn’t know where you are. You’re just feeding us bullshit in hopes that we’ll release you. Well, that’s not going to happen. Not today.”

            The girl’s face fell, and she looked so small in the alleyway they were holding her in. She was surrounded by dirt and trash, and all I wanted was to help her escape. Even if Levi wasn’t coming, I was going to do something for her.

            The man turned back around to face me, reaching out to flick the lapel of my navy-blue blazer. “You’re not from around here, are you, kid? People from here don’t have enough money to purchase such fine clothing. What are you doing in these parts, anyhow? You should just run along already. Save yourself the trouble.”

            “I said I wasn’t leaving without her,” I muttered.

            He sighed, exasperated. “I’m really going to hate to have to ruin those nice clothes of yours.” His hand whipped out, but I dodged it in the nick of time, bringing my knee up to smash it against his groin. He toppled over, groaning as he collapsed to his knees. “Get him, Nile! What the hell are you just standing around for?”

            The other man holding the girl pushed her aside like a rag doll, coming to a stand so he could face me head on. I noticed that he was without a weapon, so I plunged forward, ducking my head down to crash right into him. With the force of my entire body weight against him, I managed to knock him back.

            “Go!” I yelled at the girl. “Get the hell out of here while you can!”

            She looked shocked that I had done anything for her, but then her eyes narrowed at the man beneath me. She shook her head. “I won’t abandon you.” She rolled over onto her feet, running over to where we were to kick the man hard in the neck. He gagged, spitting up blood. “Come on!” She latched onto my arm, pulling me up to a stand. “We’re on their turf right now, but Levi’s isn’t too far from here. If we get there, they won’t mess with us anymore.”

            I nodded. “Lead the way.”

            She booked it down the alleyway, with me right on her feet. She took a sharp right turn, her feet splashing up water as we crossed a flooded out street. People stared at us as we ran, their eyes going wide when they saw that two men were chasing after us. They were hot on our tail, and if we didn’t hurry up, they were going to catch us.

            I looked back at them over my shoulder, seeing their faces contorted into expressions of anger. If they caught us, they’d show us no mercy.

            “They’re right behind us,” I said.

            The girl’s head whipped around. “Shit! We’re going to have to do something quick.”

            “Like what?”

            As we passed a tin trashcan, she grabbed hold of it, throwing it at the men following us. Since they hadn’t been expecting it, it hit them head on, knocking one of them back.

            She pumped her fist in the air. “Like that. Now come on.” She snatched up the sleeve of my blazer, pulling me along as she ran down narrow streets. “We’re almost there. Just a little further.”

            My heart was hammering in my chest, my body light with adrenaline. We were going to get out of here.

            Suddenly the girl stopped in front of me, and I slammed into her, stumbling back to land on my behind. My eyes darted up, seeing what she was seeing. There were about five men in front of us, blocking our way. They all held some type of weapon.

            “Turn around,” the girl shouted, but when she looked behind us, she froze. “Damn! There’s more.”

            I jumped to my feet, pulling her behind me to protect her in any way that I could. I stared at all the men, counting a total of fifteen of them. There was no way for us to run through them without getting caught. We had to fight. If we didn’t fight, they were going to kill us. I had no doubt about that.

            “We have to fight,” I said.

            I was expecting her to cower, to show some type of weakness. But to my surprise, she moved to stand next to me, lifting her fists up to her face. “I won’t die a coward. Come on, you fuckers!”

            The first set of men came running up to us, and I sidestepped around one, kneeing him in the stomach. When he hunched over, I grabbed a handful of his hair, bringing his head down as I brought my knee up. I heard a sickly crunch as his nose broke, but I didn’t focus on it, pushing him out of my way.

            I took the bat he had been holding, bringing it up to swing it down on another man’s neck, screaming as I did it. I whirled around, clenching my teeth together as another man ran at me. I met him halfway, thrusting the end of the bat against his throat. He fell over in a coughing fit, and I stepped over him, ready to take on whoever got in my way.

            That’s when I heard the girl scream. “Help me!”

            I turned around to see that a man with greasy blonde hair was holding her in a headlock, the blade of his knife pointed to her face.

            “I got this little bitch,” he said.

            No part of me hesitated to charge at him, catching him off guard. He expected me to back down, but I never would. Not until there was nothing left in me. Not until I was dead.

            He tossed the girl to the side at the last second, bringing the blade down on my arm. I couldn’t even feel the pain, too riled up, too angry. I smacked the bat hard against his face; satisfied when I saw his two front teeth shatter as blood spewed out of his mouth.

            “We have to get out of here,” the girl said, getting back onto her feet. “There’s too many of them.”

            I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. “If we win, we live. If we lose, we die. If we don’t fight, we can’t win. Do you understand that?”

            A look of determination settled on her face, and she nodded once. “I understand. If we don’t fight, we can’t win.”

            “That’s right,” I said. “Now give it everything you’ve got!”

            Just as we were about to face the men that were heading our way, a loud whirring sound stopped us in our tracks. I looked from side to side, trying to pinpoint where it was coming from, but the men looked just as confused as I did.

            “Big Bro!” the girl hollered. “I told you assholes he was going to come for me!”

            Out of nowhere, two men appeared, seeming to come from the sky. One landed beside us, his blue eyes taking in the girl that was beside me.

            “Isabel,” he said. “Always getting into trouble.”

            She shrugged. “Not on purpose.”

            He jerked his chin in my direction. “Who’s this?”

            “I don’t know. He saved me, though. Reece had me, then this boy came along and helped me out.”

            The guy’s eyes darted back to me. “We’ll get you out of this. Don’t worry.”

            I nodded once. “What do you need me to do?”

            “Just lay low for now. Levi will handle it from here.”

            “You’re not Levi?” I asked, though now that I was looking at him, he was a little too pretty to be some badass thug. He had dirty-blonde hair that fell carelessly onto his face, bringing out his pale-blue eyes.

            He shook his head. “Nah, I’m Farlan. _That’s_ Levi.” He pointed a knife he had in hand in front of us. I followed the direction of the blade with my eyes, seeing a short guy walk up to the men. He had the blackest hair I had ever seen, and pale skin that stood out against his dark clothes.

            Why was he just walking right up to them? Why wasn’t he fighting? And why weren’t any of the men charging at him?

            My eyes scanned the lining of men, surprised to see that they looked scared. Were they really that frightened of one man? He didn’t look all that tough to me, though he must have been. You didn’t just earn the title of the underground’s strongest for nothing. Still, I couldn’t see what the big deal was.

            Levi unsheathed a knife, looking down at the shiny blade as he spoke. “Under whose order did you attack Isabel on?”

            The men all visibly shrank back, but one stepped forward, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed hard. “R-Reece, sir!”

            Levi nodded slowly, still looking down at his knife. “I see. I don’t feel like getting my clothes dirty with your filthy blood, so I’ll let you all go. But if you ever go after Isabel again, I will spare no life. Is that understood?”

            All the men nodded at once, some of them even shouting, “Yes, sir!”

            “Now get out of my sight,” Levi said, and they didn’t waste a second to run away. Then he turned around, giving me the first view of his face. He had a face unlike any I’d ever seen before. The shape of his eyes drew my attention, and I watched as his gray irises trained on me. “Who are you? Are you one of them?”

            “He’s not!” Isabel said right away in my defense. “He saved my life.”

            “Is that so?” Levi came walking up to me, his eyes moving downward to glance at the wound on my arm. “You’re injured.”

            I clamped my hand over the gash. “It’s nothing.”

            He crinkled his nose. “Don’t touch it with your dirty hand. It will get infected.”

            I let my hand fall to my side. “Why didn’t you kill any of them? They were going to kill us.”

            He seemed uninterested in me as he sheathed his knife. “I don’t like needless death.” He turned his back to me. “Come. I’ll dress your wound.”

            “It’s ok,” I said. “I really should be getting home. My mom will worry.”

            “Where do you live?”

            “Trost City.”

            “You’re a long way from home.”

            I stepped around him, wanting to see his face. “Yeah. My mom is sick, and this lady told me this special herb could help her, but that they don’t sell it in Trost. She said that I could get it here, so I came.” I dug my hand into the pocket of my slacks, pulling out a small plastic bag full of herbs. “It was worth it.”

            Levi gazed at me in a strange way, then he said, “You’re coming with us. Before you go home, I will dress your wound. Don’t argue with me. It’s pointless.”

            I sighed. “All right, but I need to go straight home afterwards.”

            He gave me no reply, simply jerking his head to the right. Immediately Isabel and Farlan started walking in that direction. When I hesitated, Isabel took my hand, tugging me forward. I fell into step with her, putting the bag of herbs back into my pocket.

            “Don’t worry,” Isabel said with a smile. “Big Bro will fix you right up. Say, what’s your name, anyway?”

            “Eren.”

            She let go of my hand to throw her arm over my shoulders, making me wince, but she didn’t seem to notice. “It’s nice to meet you, Eren. Thanks for saving me back there. I was backed into a corner by those bastards.”

            “You don’t have to thank me,” I said. “I wasn’t going to leave you to get hurt.”

            She looked over at me, smiling wider. “I like you! Too bad you live so far away. How’s it like living in Trost? I always wanted to go, but Big Bro says they don’t like our kind.” Her face fell.

            “It’s not bad, I guess. And if you want, you can come visit me. I wouldn’t mind.”

            “Really?!” She whipped around, walking backwards as she gaped at Levi. “Did you hear that, Big Bro? He said I could visit him in Trost. Can I? Pleeeeaaaaase?”

            “We’ll see,” Levi told her.

            She turned back around, lifting her arms up over her head as she ran to catch up with Farlan. That left me alone with Levi, who was keeping a close distance behind me. I purposely slowed down my pace to come into step with him. He kept his eyes in front of him, acting like I didn’t exist.

            “How far until we’re at your place?” I asked.

            “It’s not far.”

            Well, he didn’t talk much. It didn’t really bother me, but I was curious about him. Even in Trost his name was known, though most people described him wrong. He wasn’t some huge, scary man. He was relatively small, but had this intensity about him. To most people, he wouldn’t seem appealing, but I found myself drawn to him.

            “How old are you?” I said, trying to make conversation. He didn’t look that old.

            His eyes slid over to look at my face. “That’s none of your concern.”

            “Oh, come on. I won’t tell anyone, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

            He steered the conversation in a different direction. “We should be there soon. You’ll have to remove your clothes before you come into my home.”

            I stopped midstride. “Remove my clothes? Why?”

            “You’re filthy and dripping wet. I won’t let you into my home like that.”

            If I weren’t so curious about where he lived, I wouldn’t have agreed. Taking off my clothes seemed a little extreme to me, but I suppose he was right. Due to the rain, and the fight I’d been in, I was a complete mess. My mom was going to get on me for the tear in my blazer.

            The rain had slowed to a drizzle by the time we reached Levi’s home. It was small, but even from the outside, it looked impeccably clean.

            After he directed me up the stairs that led to his front door, he said, “Undress.”

            It shouldn’t have been embarrassing. We were both guys. Yet I found myself flushing as I tugged off my blazer, throwing it over the side of the cement railing. I dropped my eyes as I took hold of the hem of my shirt, lifting it up and over my head.

            Levi stepped up to me, looking at the gash in my arm. “That’s deep. Are you in a lot of pain?”

            “Me?” I shook my head, distracting myself from his close proximity by unbuckling my belt. “No. It doesn’t hurt too bad.”

            He moved back to lean against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. “You went through a lot of trouble to save someone you don’t even know. Though I am grateful to you for it.”

            I shrugged. “I wanted to help her. They had her outnumbered, and I wasn’t going to sit back and watch her get hurt.”

            “A lot of people would have.”

            I dropped my pants, peering up at him. “I’m not a lot of people.”

            “So I see.”

            When I was in nothing but my boxers, he opened his door, letting me step inside. I couldn’t see a thing until he flipped on a light, illuminating the small room. There wasn’t a lot of furniture, and the living room was connected to the kitchen, but everything was clean and tidy.

            “Where’d Isabel and Farlan go?” I asked, noticing that they hadn’t come inside the house.

            “They went to go pick up supplies for dinner. Now come into the kitchen.”

            I followed after him, sitting down when he pulled out a wooden chair. He left me there, disappearing behind a door that probably led to a bathroom. It was cold, and I was severely underdressed, but I wasn’t uncomfortable. I should’ve been worried for my safety, being in a thug’s house—not just any thug, either—but I wasn’t worried at all.

            A while later, Levi came back into the kitchen holding a small wooden box. He set it down on the table, pulling out a chair to sit opposite me. I watched him as he retrieved a bottle of antiseptic. He glanced up at me as he poured some of the clear liquid onto a cotton ball.

            “This is going to hurt,” he said.

            “I can handle pain.”

            He dabbed the cotton ball against my wound, and I gritted my teeth against the sudden stinging sensation. He did it a few more times, using a clean cotton ball every time before he produced a needle and thread.

            “What are you going to do with that?” I asked, though it was obvious.       

            “I’m going to suture the gash. It’s too deep to leave it like that.”

            “Okay.” I looked away as I felt the tip of the needle sink into my skin. But as he tugged it up, closing up the end, I glanced over at him, taking in his concentrated expression. He wasn’t bad looking. He had an interesting face, and these thin eyebrows that would’ve looked bad on anyone else. “I really like your eyes.”

            His movements faltered as those gray eyes moved up to my face. “Thanks. Yours aren’t so bad, either.”

            As he continued to work, a comfortable silence settled over us. I couldn’t look away from his face, memorizing every dip and curve. He had sharp features, and I kind of liked his strange haircut.

            “Finished,” Levi announced, sitting back in his seat. “Your clothes should be dry by now.”

            “Thanks.” I stared down at his handiwork, surprised at how professional it looked.

            “I’ll walk you home.”

            I stood up. “That really isn’t necessary. I’ll be fine.”

            “I’m not giving you a choice in this. Now go get dressed.”

            I sighed, walking out to the front patio. Picking up my clothes, I shuffled into them, jumping up when Levi came up behind me. He narrowed his eyes at me, and I asked, “What is it?”

            “Wash up when you get home, ok? And be careful with your wound.”

            “Okay. I will.”

            “Let’s go.”

            As I followed him down the stairs, I couldn’t help but hope that this wouldn’t be the last time I’d be seeing him. 

                 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I wanted to explain a few things before I continue with this fic. The underground city isn't actually underground, like it is in the manga. It's just a nickname for a shady part of the city where thugs roam. Also, I'm glad about the response I got for making Eren a total badass in this fic. To be honest, I always saw him as a badass in the manga/anime. Of course he got himself into a lot of trouble, but he wasn't one to back down, or cower. That's how I wanted him in this fic. Hopefully I succeeded in the first chapter. :)
> 
> With that said, enjoy. :)

A few days after the whole incident in the underground, I realized someone was following me. At first I thought it was just a coincidence, that I was making a big deal out of nothing, but after I saw the same man in all the same places as me for two days in a row, I knew that it wasn’t happening by chance.

            Normally, I would have taken the time to assess the situation, but since he now knew where I lived, I didn’t want to waste a second to confront him. It was also likely that he wasn’t the only one following me, which strengthened my resolve to spring into action.

            It was Saturday evening, and I had just been out with my two best friends before I decided to walk home instead of catch a ride with one of them. So I was by myself, walking the streets of Trost, trying to spot a secluded area where I could lead my pursuer. To corner him out in public wouldn’t be a smart thing to do, though having a couple of people around would do me some good. Witnesses would keep any other men at bay.

            As I strode down the sidewalk, my eyes skimmed over my surroundings. That’s when I saw a dumpster behind a donut shop. It provided enough coverage for me to be blocked from view from any one passing, but it also gave me the option to hurry out into the public eye if anyone else should come by to defend him.

            Stopping, I turned toward the dumpster, bending down to pretend to tie my shoes. All the while, my eyes never left the man walking up behind me. I waited until he was close enough to spin around, reaching out to snag the front of his shirt. I yanked him toward me, using his weight to toss him over my head.

            When he landed on his back, I moved on top of him, digging the heels of my palms against his shoulders, watching him wince under the pressure. Good. The bastard could deal with the pain if he thought he could follow me without any consequences.

            “Why are you following me?” I said through clenched teeth, adjusting myself so that all my weight was falling onto his shoulders. He was bigger than me, but he wasn’t trying to move away, which told me he was probably under the order not to hurt me. “Who the fuck sent you? Was it Reece?”

            His dark eyes narrowed at that, and everything about his appearance told me he wasn’t from Trost. He was from the underground. The dark scruff on his face, the greasy brown hair, the dirt clinging to his skin… He was a thug. Most likely sent here by Reece. I couldn’t see anyone else wanting to keep track of me.

            “Well?” I bit out.

            When I knew that he wasn’t going to give me an answer, I sat back, waiting for him to attack me. He kept his eyes trained on my face, his lips tightening into a straight line. I could see him calculating it all out in his head. I was just waiting for him to make his move.

            _Go ahead, you fuck._

He took his sweet time, his fingers curling into his palms. I put my weight on my feet, ready to stand up at a moment's notice. Then I smiled down at him, knowing he thought I was just some weak kid, but he was going to regret underestimating me. I’d make sure of that.

            Thinking he was going to catch me off guard, he sat up fast, but I was ready for him, bringing my arm up to drive it against his neck. He grabbed his throat, eyes watering as he coughed and spat up saliva. I clutched the collar of his shirt, tugging him forward before pushing him back against the dumpster behind him, satisfied when I saw his head smash against the metal.

            “Wait,” he wheezed. “You stupid kid. I’m not here to hurt you.”

            “Then you better start talking. I’m giving you two minutes.”

            He clawed at my hands that were still taking claim of the fabric of his shirt. “You cocky shit. Don’t think I can’t hurt you! If I wasn’t given orders to bring you back in one piece, I’d make you pay for this.”

            “Really?” I moved closer to him, bringing us face to face. “Show me.”

            I knew he couldn’t resist, so it didn’t surprise me any when he knocked my hands away from him. That’s when I brought my knee forward, ramming it in between his parted legs, making contact with his groin. He fell over onto his side, clutching at his genitals.

            “Thanks for showing me you’re pathetic,” I said, getting to my feet. “You’re not even worth my time.” I went to walk away, but he reached out a hand to stop me. I dropped my eyes to look at him. “What is it? If you have something to say, then say it already.”

            “Reece—” He groaned, curling inward. “Fuck, kid. I thought Reece was out of his mind, but now I see what he means. He wants to recruit you.”

            “Hm.” I smirked, lifting my foot up to press it against his forehead, shoving his head back. “Tell him to fuck off.”

            He gritted his teeth. “You’ll regret saying that.” He scrambled up into a sitting position, still holding his crotch. “He won’t give up. You’re the best he’s seen since Levi.”

            “That’s great,” I muttered sarcastically. “I’m not working for that man. He hurts people. That’s not what I’m about.”

            “Sure about that, kid?” He glanced down at himself. “Seems like you’re pretty good at hurting people, to me.”

            “People who deserve it, yes.”

            He shook his head. “You’re a monster, you just don’t know it yet. You think you won’t end up like someone like me? Come off it. You’ve got a rage that won’t be sated with you living out in your little suburban life. You want a taste of true freedom, don’t you? Reece can offer you that.”

            “No,” I said, done listening to his shit.

            “You think you’re so high and mighty, little spoiled rich kid. That girl that you rescued the other day, her ‘Big Bro’ is just as bad as the man you saved her from. He’s killed plenty.”

            I stepped closer to him, noticing the way he flinched back. “Listen, I’m not here to talk about Levi. I’m denying your boss's offer. It’s as simple as that. Stop following me around, or next time I’ll do more damage than just kicking you in the nuts.”

            Turning away from him, I made my way back out onto the public sidewalk, keeping in stride with a few passing pedestrians. They paid me no attention, their eyes never diverting from the path ahead of them. It all felt too easy. Reece couldn’t have just sent one of his men after me. There had to be others. But where were they?

            Keeping my eyes peeled for anything unusual, I decided it would be best to stay away from my house for now. Though they didn’t have orders to harm me, that didn’t guarantee the same for my mom. These thugs didn’t play fair, and it wouldn’t surprise me if they tried using her against me. I wouldn’t let that happen.

            With nowhere to go, I walked into a burger joint, hoping I’d be able to spot anyone who followed in after me. Ordering a meal, I feigned innocence, keeping a close watch on my surroundings while I pretended to be fully absorbed in the task at hand. But my eyes never stopped taking in every one who came into the restaurant, memorizing their appearance and where they sat.

            With my tray of food in hand, I went to sit down at an empty table that gave me a good view of the whole layout of the restaurant. My eyes darted to look at every person that had walked in after me. I analyzed their faces, looking at the smaller details, like their clothing, and the jewelry they wore. Most of them seemed from around here, except for one.

            There was a man sitting by the door that wore a black hoodie that obscured his face in shadows. He was hunched over in his seat, his head turned in my direction. I could only make out the bottom half of his face, but it was enough for me to see that he was clean-shaven.

            Picking up a French fry, I thought of ways that I could escape without having to pass the stranger by the front entrance. He would follow me out, there was no doubt about that in my mind, so I’d have to find a way to get out of here without him noticing.

            I didn’t have anything on me that I could use as a weapon, and I wore a white button-down with a black vest over top it. That wouldn’t allow me to blend into the crowd, especially since I also had on a blue tie. I wished I hadn’t worn the outfit my mom had bought for me, but then again, it had made her happy to see me in it, and that was enough for me to dress in something uncomfortable.

            As I was mulling over all this, the man stood up. I dropped my fry onto the tray, moving my hands under the table. I watched him weave through the tables, noticing his fast, almost graceful movements. He wasn’t going to be easy to get away from, but if I had to put up a fight, I would.

            When he slid into the seat opposite me, I glared him down. That’s when he pushed back the hoodie on his head. “Levi?”

            “You’re quite a nuisance,” he said. “The fact that I had to come all the way to Trost is bothersome.”

            “I didn’t ask you to.”

            His eyes flicked over to my face. “No, you didn’t, but Isabel did. Plus, I owe you one.”

            “Owe me one? What is this all about?”

            “Isabel overheard Reece’s men talking about you. She knew he was planning to send men out here to locate you, and try to get you to join with him. She likes you. She didn’t want you getting hurt.”

            I scoffed, sitting back. “I won’t get hurt.”

            “How’s your arm?”

            I knew why he had mentioned my injury at this time, but I chose to ignore where he was steering this conversation. “So you’re here to protect me?”

            “There’s no protecting you,” he said. “Reece won’t let you off the hook. You either join his gang, or he kills you. There is no other way.”

            I clenched my teeth. “Fuck that. I won’t join him, and I’m not going to get killed over that.”

            Levi leaned back to peer at me. “You’ve got quite a personality on you. Not to mention the fact that you were able to take out several of Reece’s men single-handedly. You’ve got potential.”

            “Not interested,” I said, pushing back in my seat.

            “Hold on. You do realize that he’ll hurt whoever will get you to succumb to his demands, right? Family, friends…he won’t stop until you’re under his order.” He looked up at me through long lashes. “That is, unless you join me.”      

            I leaned forward over the table, staring him in the eyes. “I said I’m not interested.” Without another word, I stalked out of the restaurant, knowing he was right on my tail. He was crazy if he thought I was going to join his ranks. I wasn’t going to hurt people just because he ordered it of me, and that’s how it would be if I let him have any control over me.

            “You’re making a mistake,” Levi said as he easily kept pace with me. I rounded the corner, doing my best to ignore him. “Do you think I want to bring you into this life? I don’t. But it’s the only way that will guarantee your safety.”

            “I don’t need your protection. I can take care of myself.”

            He snatched my arm, pulling me around to face him. “I’ve seen plenty to know that that may be true here in Trost, but it won’t hold against a gang of street smart men.” His eyebrows knitted together. “On top of everything, you had to be stubborn.”

            I yanked my arm out of his grasp. “I won’t let you control my actions.”

            “Fine,” he said. “I won’t give you any orders. That’s not how I treat my people, anyway. Now will you agree, because if you haven’t noticed, there are men following us, and we’re not in the underground. I hold no rank here. They won’t hesitate to attack us.”

            “If I agree, where does that leave me? I can’t just go about my life like usual, can I? There will be things required of me, right?”

            He nodded once. “Yes. You’ll need to come down to the underground, be sworn into my group, and prove your loyalty.”

            “And how exactly would I do that?”

            “There will be some tests you’ll have to perform, but I promise you that it won’t require you to harm anyone. You seem to be against that.”

            “I am,” I confirmed. “The innocent, that is. People like Reece aren’t innocent.”

            “I’ve already noticed that. I saw what you did to that man by the dumpster.”

            “That was hardly anything.” I leaned up against the side of the restaurant, ignoring the throbbing pain in my arm. When Levi had grabbed me, his fingers had dug into my wound. “So, where do we go from here? Do I just accept and then you call me on a later day to come and do the official initiation?”

            He moved in front of me. “That’s not how this works. We have to do it today. If we wait, those men will do anything they can to prevent it from happening.”

            I turned on my heel, walking away from him. “I can’t leave my mom.”

            “Are you an idiot? If you lead them back to your house now, they will cause trouble.”

            I didn’t slow my hurried steps. “Don’t try to boss me around already.”

            “You…” He reached out to take hold of my arm again, using it to spin me around and shove me against the wall. “You’re a real piece of work. I should let you die for being such a pain in the ass.”

            “I won’t die,” I growled, pushing against him. “I’m not weak.” I could feel warmth flood my left arm, and I knew the makeshift stitches had torn open, but I didn’t care. He couldn’t make me do anything I wasn’t willing to do.

            Levi held me with little effort, which pissed me off to no end. I could care less that he was some strong, underground thug. He had no say over what I did. So, timing it perfectly, I brought my knee up, jamming it against his stomach. It felt like hitting a wall, and he didn’t loosen his grip on my arm, or give way.

            “She’s sick!” I said, my last form of defense. “I can’t just leave her. You don’t understand.”

            “It’s you who doesn’t understand. If you want her to stay safe, then come with me.”

            “Why should I trust you?”

            He released me, looking disgusted at the blood staining his fingers, but he didn’t step away, keeping his close proximity. “I’m not doing this for you. If Isabel hadn’t asked me to come, I wouldn’t have. I’m risking myself by being here. Do you even understand that?”

            Could I trust his word? He was a thug, a trademark criminal who stole and killed for his own personal gain. But if I were to trust my own judgment, then I’d go with him, because if he had wanted to hurt me, he would have already. I knew he had the capacity to force me to his will, yet he hadn’t done anything passed asking me.

            I didn’t know if I was making the right decision, but it was the only option left for me to choose. “I’ll go with you.”

            In response, he nodded, then said, “Stick close behind me. There are four men to our left, hiding behind that red sedan, and six men ahead of us, posing as civilians.” He glanced down at my arm, which was still bleeding. “Tch.” With one swipe of his wrist, he tore the sleeve off my dress shirt. I glared at him, but he ignored me, wrapping the fabric around my arm, tying it tight around the wound. “Remember: Keep right behind me.” And just like that, he moved in front of me.

            Like he told me to, I kept right behind him as he walked through the streets, seeming to blend in with the darkness surrounding us. It made sense why he wore all black, because now he was hard to spot. I, on the other hand, stuck out like a sore thumb, but I was quick on my feet, and on high alert. If one of those men tried to come out and nab me, I was ready for them.

            “Why didn’t they make a move when we were just standing around?” I asked.

            “They won’t attack me head on. They are going to try to be sneaky about it.”

            “Are they really that afraid of you?”

            He looked at me over his shoulder. “Yes. Now shush.”

            I didn’t put up any type of argument, keeping watch for any sudden movements around us. Everything seemed normal, so I couldn’t understand why Levi abruptly moved back, clamping a hand over my mouth as he pushed me into the shadows. His eyes darted to the left, and he used his free hand to signal in the same direction.

            I followed his movements, spotting a group of four men that hadn’t been there just a minute ago. How in the hell did he even see them? The streetlights were dim, barely illuminating the streets with a soft, yellow glow.

            “Stay here,” he whispered, not waiting for a response from me before he disappeared into the darkness.

            I tried to keep my eyes focused on him, but he was quick, and there wasn’t enough light for me to make him out once he passed a certain distance. A part of me wanted to go after him, to help him in any way, but I knew that would wind up being a mistake on my part. If he needed my help, he would’ve asked for it. So instead, I waited.

            It wasn’t like me to sit back and do nothing, but slipping up right now could mean life or death. This wasn’t the time to act out, but when I heard commotion coming from where Levi had just gone, I couldn’t control myself. For better or worse, I was going to do something.

            I followed the sounds into the night, not stopping until I came upon a set of men that were in the midst of fighting Levi. I sprung forward, but came to a halt a few feet away from them, because even though he was outnumbered, five against one, he was taking them down with swift kicks and punches.

            When his eyes landed on me, he looked annoyed. “Idiot,” he said, right before he came running at me. I moved into a fighting stance, but he ran passed me. I turned around to see him take down a man that had been just a few inches from where I stood. After the man was lying unconscious on the ground, he came back over to me. “Do you see why you should listen to me?”

            “I wanted to help.”

            “You can help by listening.”

            “I don’t like to sit around doing nothing.”

            He grabbed the collar of my shirt, jerking it toward him to drag me closer. “If this is going to work, I need you to listen to me. You have a lot of will power, which isn’t a bad thing, but you need to learn when and where to use it. To throw yourself in the face of danger without thinking of the consequences is foolish behavior. You won’t only get yourself hurt that way. You’ll get others hurt, as well. And I won’t have that, if you’re going to be a part of my group.”

            “It’s not like I asked to be a part of your group in the first place.”

            “Neither did I,” he said. “But we both have to make the best of the situation. Now stop giving me trouble. There are more men around.” He let go of me, turning his back to me to scan the street before he crooked a finger over his shoulder. “Don’t make me regret taking you in, Eren.”

            Hearing my name come from him made my stomach lurch up into my throat. I couldn’t understand why I had reacted that way, but I didn’t take the time to linger on it, instead trailing after him as he began to jog down the street. I didn’t know if what I was doing was the right thing, but so long as I was going to go through with it, then I was going to put my trust in Levi.

            After all, what other choice did I have? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any questions, feel free to ask me. I hope your all enjoying this fic so far. You can also reach me on my IG account: @levi.eren_ 
> 
> Thank you for the kudos, comments, and subscriptions so far. I truly appreciate it. <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a bit longer to update then I expected. If you're a reader of Our Cryptic Love, then you know I update quick, and hopefully that will happen with this fic once I get into a rhythm of things. 
> 
> Anyhoo, thanks for the kudos so far! You guys are great!
> 
> Now go on and read. :)

The underground city wasn’t much of a city at all, nor was it underground. I don’t know how it had come to be called that, but the only people who resided there were either too poor to afford anything better, or hard time criminals. My mom had forbidden me to go near this area. After all the trouble I got into at school, she didn’t feel comfortable letting me near criminals. Yet here I was.

            I followed Levi through the familiar streets, wondering what type of tests he was going to put me through. Since I wouldn’t be hurting anyone, then maybe it would have something to do with strength and endurance. If that were the case, then I’d pass. I’d make sure of it.

            Levi turned his head to look at me over his shoulder. “How old are you, anyway? You look young.”

            “Age doesn’t matter,” I said.

            “In these parts it really doesn’t. Even so, I’d still like to know.”

            I wanted to keep my age a secret. He was doing the same, after all. But I didn’t want to come off as childish, so I said, “Sixteen.”

            His eyes darted back to me. “I see.”

            That’s it? That’s all he had to say about it? It didn’t really matter. No matter how old I was, I was in this whether I liked it or not. There was no going back, and the saying “no good deed goes unpunished” was a lot truer than I ever expected it to be.

            Levi glanced up at the night sky. “It’s getting dark out. I don’t know if we’ll be able to do anything tonight.”

            I picked up my pace, trailing behind him until I moved fast enough to step in front of him, blocking his way. “What are you saying? That I’m going to have to spend the night out here? At least let me text my mom.”

            He didn’t stop, moving around me with ease. “If that’s what you want, then go ahead. You seem to be attached to her.” His gray eyes settled on my face for a split second before they moved forward to once again keep track of our surroundings. “That’s never a good thing when you’re down here. Attachments can, and will be used against you by our enemies.”

            “If anyone ever hurts my mom, I’ll kill them without hesitation.”

            His steps faltered, but he was quick to cover it up, not knowing that I had already seen his slip up. “You’re willing to lay down your life for the ones you love.”

            He hadn’t phrased it as a question, but still I answered, “Yes.”

            “You may not be so bad after all,” he said, but gave me no chance to react as he quickly added, “We’re almost to my turf. Once we are, you can relax. No one will move against you there.”

            I nodded, wondering how Levi, the strongest underground thug, came to be. He didn’t seem like a bad man, but then again, he could be deceiving me. If I were going to be under his ruling, then I’d have to come to trust him, but was I capable of that? I didn’t trust people easily, and I wasn’t just going to hand it over to him. He was going to have to earn it. Prove to me that he deserved it.

            “You’re a student,” Levi said, again not phrasing it like a question. “Which school do you attend?”

            I sighed, not knowing why he was bothering to get more information about me. “Stohess Academy.”

            “A private school?”

            “Yes.”

            “We’re here,” he said, dropping the subject as he pushed his hood back. Though it was dark out, there was enough moonlight to illuminate the side of his face. When he caught me staring, he lingered back until I was in front of him. I found that that upset me, and I crossed my arms over my chest, sulking as I kept on walking. “Turn left.”

            I did as he said, murmuring under my breath, “I don’t know why you’re not leading.”

            He let out a noise that sounded like a snort, but he muffled it before I could tell. “Just keep walking, Eren.”

            I didn’t say anything to him as we continued making our way to his house. Instead, I focused on the run down buildings surrounding us. None of them were in good condition, and though they seemed abandoned, there were people residing within. How many people found themselves living here when they couldn’t afford to live somewhere better? Things only got worse for them, because once you lived in the underground city, a lot of businesses wouldn’t hire you on.

            As we passed an alleyway, I saw a small group of people hurdling around a trashcan fire. They paid us no mind as we walked along, too focused on keeping warm on this cold night. I felt bad for them. Did they really deserve to live like this? Did anyone?

            My mind was pulled away from my thoughts as specks of water fell onto my face. I stopped, tilting my head up to look at the dark clouds covering up the stars.

            “Don’t just stand there,” Levi said, clutching the back of my shirt. “It’s going to rain, and I don’t feel like getting wet.”

            I let him drag me, keeping my eyes locked on the sudden cloudburst. “I like the rain.”

            He scoffed. “You sound like Isabel.”

            Up until now, I had completely forgotten about her. “Does she live with you?”

            “Yes. So does Farlan.”

            “Are they like your family?”

            He released my shirt, moving in front of me. “You can say that.”

            It took us a good while to reach his house, and by the time we did, we were both soaking wet. Levi was cursing as we ran up the steps that led to his front door, holding out a hand when we got to it. I already knew what he was about to tell me, so before he could, I loosened up my tie, slipping it over my head.

            He watched me for a bit longer then necessary, and then began to undress beside me. This caught me off guard, and I stared at him as he pulled off his shirt, revealing his torso. He was trim, with defined muscles stretched over milky skin. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t look away, entranced by the way his body moved as he slid off his pants.

            As he was folding his clothes, he looked over at me, and I immediately began to fumble with the buttons of my shirt, pretending that it required all of my attention. Why had I been staring at him? His body shouldn’t have been so…intriguing.

            “Hurry up,” Levi said, pushing open his door. “Don’t be too loud. By now, Isabel and Farlan are asleep.” He stepped inside, and I relaxed, my face burning as I realized what I had just done.

            Pushing the thoughts aside, I finished undressing, hanging my clothes next to his before I walked into his house, gently closing the door behind me. He hadn’t turned on the lights, but I could make out the outline of his body as he walked about in the kitchen, seeming to be searching for something.

            After a few minutes passed by, a light flickered on as he lit a lantern with a match. He lifted it off the table, beckoning me by crooking his finger. I swallowed, not understanding why I was nervous. He had seen me in my underwear before, yet I felt self-conscious and uneasy as I made my way over to where he stood.

            “Farlan and Isabel sleep in the backroom,” he said. “They share a bed. As you can see, we don’t have any furniture, so you and I will share my bed for tonight.”

            My eyes widened. “N-No, that’s okay. I can sleep on the floor. You shouldn’t have to share your bed with me.” I hated that I had stuttered. What a foolish reaction. It wasn’t a big deal. I had shared a bed with Armin countless times when he spent the night at my house, so why did this feel different? Was it because I didn’t know Levi?

            “One day you’ll learn not to argue with me.” He grabbed my wrist, yanking me in the direction of the door beside the kitchen counter. He released me to turn the knob, pushing it open to uncover a small room. There wasn’t a lot of furnishing, but there was a bed—a small bed. It had to be twin sized, and I had no idea how we were both going to sleep comfortably on it.

            Levi moved forward to place the lantern on the nightstand beside the bed. I expected him to dress in nightclothes, but he simply climbed onto the bed in nothing but his boxers, pulling the white sheet up to slip his legs beneath it.

            “Well?” he said, eyeing me. “Hurry up, so I can shut off the lantern.”

            My heart was beating so fast, that I felt if he listened closely, he would be able to hear it. I tried to ignore the fluttering sensation in my chest as I crossed the room, stopping when I came up to the empty side of the bed. I stared at it for a couple of seconds before I hurried onto it, turning away from him and pulling the blanket up and over my chin.

            “Don’t hog the blanket,” he mumbled.

            “S-Sorry.” I loosened my grip on the sheet, allowing him to pull some onto himself.

            “You’re strange,” he said, sounding exhausted. “Back there with those men surrounding you, you didn’t seem the least bit afraid. Now you’re sleeping in the same bed with a stranger and _that_ makes you nervous?”

            “I’m not nervous.” I was glad he couldn’t see my face, because I could feel heat flooding my cheeks.

            “Sure, kid. Just go to sleep already.”

            It only took a few minutes for me to realize that falling asleep was impossible. Levi didn’t seem to find it difficult at all, considering his breathing became heavy within seconds. How he could fall asleep? I didn’t know. Maybe it was because he was strong, and didn’t feel threatened by me.

            I scooted toward the edge of the bed, trying to get as comfortable as I could, but sleep was determined to evade me. I sighed, wiggling around, unable to decide whether I should just lay here awake, or sleep on the floor.

            “Stop moving around,” Levi said, startling me. “We both have a lot to do tomorrow, so go to sleep already.”

            In a moment of defiance, I muttered, “I can’t, so stop telling me what to do already.”

            To my surprise, he turned on his side to face me. I refused to turn toward him, staring at the wall, hoping he would just go to sleep. But luck wasn’t on my side, because I felt his hand on my shoulder, giving me a few good shakes.

            “I realize this must be hard for you,” he said, “but if you don’t get any sleep, you will struggle tomorrow. There are rules on how to enter my group, and even if I want to help you, if you don’t abide by those rules, there’s no way I can take you in. Do you understand that?”

            I sighed. “I do.”

            “Good. Now get some rest.” He didn’t turn away, and I could feel his breath ghosting against the back of my neck. I couldn’t figure out why he was having this affect on me. Earlier, it had been easy to treat him as an equal, now I was finding it hard to form words around him.

            Confused, I settled for shutting my eyes and thinking about the tasks I would have to perform come tomorrow. He hadn’t given me any details, and I wondered if he wasn’t allowed to. Was I going to go into this blindly? If so, I could probably handle it. I wasn’t a wimp, and I wouldn’t back down for nothing.

            Before I realized it, I fell asleep, only waking up when someone shook me hard enough to cause my head to whip back against the pillow. “Hey,” I grumbled, rubbing my eyes with my hands. “What gives?” Slowly, my vision cleared, and I became alarmed when I saw a pair of vibrant green eyes hovering above my face. I scrambled back, heaving in deep breaths of air.

            “Did I scare you?”

            That’s when I remembered everything that had happened last night, and I realized the girl sitting before me was Isabel. “Sort of.”

            “I did,” she said, sounding proud of herself. “Big Bro came through! He nabbed you from those men, didn’t he? Came in and swooped you up.”

            I glared daggers at her. “No. I didn’t need saving. I was doing perfectly fine on my own.” I pushed the sheet off of me, sliding my legs over the side of the bed to stand up. “Is that what he told you?”

            “Huh?” She followed after me. “He didn’t say a thing. Just told me that you were in here. He isn’t much of a talker, that Big Bro of mine.” She put her arm around my shoulders, steering me toward the door. “I’m surprised he let you sleep in his bed. He’s a clean freak, so normally he doesn’t like anyone in his room.”

            I shrugged, not really caring about the reason behind him letting me share a bed with him. “Are my clothes still outside?”

            She shook her head. “Nope. Big Bro washed them. They’re out here in the living room.”

            “Oh,” I said, spotting them folded on top of the table. I walked over to it, grabbing my shirt to slip my arms through the sleeves. “I forgot that it’s ruined.” I looked down at my arm, which was still wrapped with what was once my right sleeve.

            “About that,” Isabel murmured. “Big Bro wants me to clean your wound and bandage it up. It should be healed enough for you not to need stiches again.”

            After I pulled on my pants, I followed Isabel out into a small wooden shed that served as the bathroom. It sort of looked like an outhouse, and it didn’t surprise me to see that it was as clean as the rest of Levi’s house. He really was a clean freak, wasn’t he?

            “Sit here,” Isabel said, pushing a short stool over to me with her foot. I sat down and she started to unwrap the fabric from around my arm. “Ew, gross. That guy got you pretty good, didn’t he? That bastard.”

            Peering down at the gash that had started to turn a flaming red color, I said, “It doesn’t hurt too bad.”

            “You’re tough. I like that!” She grabbed a bottle of antiseptic, not at all gentle as she poured a generous amount onto my wound. I gritted my teeth, looking the other way as she dabbed at it with a clean cloth. “How old are you, Eren? I’m sixteen. You look my age.”

            “I am. We’re the exact same age.”

            “No way! This is the best. Farlan and Levi are a lot older than me, so they treat me like a kid. Now I’ll have someone who won’t look down on me.”

            Curiosity got the best of me, and I asked, “How old is Levi, anyway?”

            “Big Bro? He’s twenty-two.”

            “That’s it? I thought he was a lot older than that. I mean, he acts a lot older.”

            “Sure does,” she said, squinting as she continued to clean my wound. “He’s been through a lot, so he’s mature for his age. He saved me when I was six, you know? I would’ve died of starvation if it weren’t for him. That’s my Big Bro for you.”

            I sat there and thought over what she had just told me. Slowly, I was beginning to wonder if I had the wrong impression about Levi. Perhaps he was given no choice on what lifestyle to live. A lot of people in the underground didn’t get to choose on how they lived, so what made him any different?

            “All done,” Isabel said with glee. “Now I just have to wrap it up. That’s the easy part.” She wrapped brown gauze around my arm, keeping it together with several strands of medical tape. “Ah, I’m finished! Let’s go eat some breakfast now. I’m hungry.”

            She led me back into the kitchen area, and I saw that Farlan and Levi were already sitting at the table with a bowl of what looked like porridge in front of them.

            “Apple?” Isabel asked, pouring herself some.

            “Yes,” Farlan told her before turning in his seat to look at me. “Go ahead and help yourself, Eren.”

            “Thanks.” I focused on what I was doing, trying not to glance in Levi’s direction. He wasn’t really eating. Instead sipping on whatever was in the mug he was holding. He held it in a strange way.

            “Come sit down next to me,” Isabel said, tugging on my arm. I went to go sit down beside her, wishing that I could be at home. Even though I had sent my mom a quick text, I knew that she would be worried about me. With how her health was declining, she didn’t need to be stressing over where I was.

            “How long is this going to take?” I asked, lifting a spoonful of porridge to my mouth. I chewed on it slowly, surprised at how good it tasted.

            Farlan answered me with a, “That all depends on how you do. It could take just a few hours, or all day.”

            “I don’t need all day,” I said, looking up at Levi, who was gazing at me with those gray, intense eyes.

            “Eat the rest of your food,” he said to me. “That’s enough talk about this. You’ll have plenty of time to think about it once it’s happening.”

            I swallowed down a retort, knowing that I wouldn’t get any of my questions answered. They weren’t going to give me any details on the tests. Whatever they were, I would handle them. I had to.

            When we were all through with our food, Levi instructed Isabel to take me to the washroom. I didn’t see a point in showering just to get dirty again, but it seemed that Levi had a thing for cleanliness. I had to scrub myself raw before Isabel approved of my appearance, then she handed me a toothbrush and comb, and I could barely refrain myself from chucking them to the floor.

            “You clean up nicely,” Isabel said once I was up to Levi’s standards. “I already knew that, of course. When you saved my back the other day, you were wearing a blazer, and you looked dashing.”

            “Dashing?” I laughed. “Hardly.”

            “No, seriously. You’re very handsome, Eren. Maybe Big Bro will let me date you.”

            I stared at her. “Date me? I doubt we’d have time for that.” Plus I wasn’t interested in a relationship. Not that I was going to tell her that. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

            “We could make some,” she said, towing me out the front door. Levi and Farlan were waiting for us on the porch. “Can I date Eren?”

            I sputtered, my eyes darting to Levi’s face.

            He didn’t even bother to look at me when he answered her with: “No. Now come on. We have serious matters to attend to.”

            Isabel pouted, going to walk beside Farlan as I lingered behind them all. My arm was hurting a lot more than it had been yesterday, and I was sure it was because I had overused it to fight that man behind the dumpster. It also didn’t help that Levi had dug his fingers into the gash. I just hoped that it would hold out for the rest of the day.

            Levi led us through a crowd of onlookers, their eyes coming to settle on me. Was this some main event, or something? Did everyone know that I was going to be performing some initiation tests today? It sure seemed that way with how everyone was stopping to stare at us.

            I ignored all of them, focusing on the man before me. Today he wore dark clothing once again, but he had added a black trench coat to the mix. All in all, he looked really… I forced myself to stop thinking right there. What was wrong with me when it came to him?

            “Come stand beside me,” Levi said to me. I moved next to him. “How is your arm feeling? You’ll need it for this first test.”

            “It’s fine,” I lied.

            His eyes narrowed, and I knew he had caught onto the lie, but he didn’t say anything about it. “In the underground, it’s important for us to master agility. For the first task, you’ll need to make it from Point A”—he pointed to the ground beneath us—“to Point B.” His finger moved up, and I saw a man that was standing on a rooftop some ways away.

            “How in the hell am I going to get on the rooftop?”

            He glanced over at me. “There are ways. And for your sake, you better find one.”

            “Fine,” I muttered. “When do I start?”

            “Now.” He peered down at a stopwatch that I didn’t notice he had been holding. “You have fifteen minutes.”

            “Fifteen?!” I didn’t even wait for a response, darting through the crowd as my eyes locked onto the man on the rooftop. He looked like a speck from down here. How was I going to make it up there? There had to be a way, but what was it?

            I sped passed people, ignoring their stares. It had to be easier than it looked, if he was expecting me to finish within fifteen minutes. As I was thinking this, I passed an alleyway, and that’s when I spotted a blue dumpster.

            _I could make use of that._

I sprinted down the alleyway, using momentum from my speed to jump up onto the top of the dumpster. The rooftop of the building was still a ways up, but there was an open window that I was going to use to my advantage.

            Springing up, I caught onto the edge, groaning in pain as I pulled myself up. My arm was throbbing, but I didn’t focus on the pain, balancing on the windowsill to reach up and grab hold of the ledge of the rooftop. Pulling my weight up once again was proving to be harder than the last time. My arm wanted to give way, but I urged it to cooperate, finally hooking my leg over the top to yank myself up.

            I didn’t waste any time, getting to my feet and running toward the man who wasn’t too far away now. He kept his eyes on me as I darted toward him, but he was standing on the roof of two buildings down, which meant that I would have to jump from rooftop to rooftop. I didn’t even think about, lunging forward when I reached the edge of the building I was on. I landed hard on my feet, ignoring the shooting pain that vibrated up my legs.

            “Come on,” I said through clenched teeth, pushing myself to go faster. I was almost there. I couldn’t fail now.

            Reaching the edge again, I pushed off the cement flooring, refusing to let out a whimper as I landed in a way that caused my legs to scream out in agony. I forced myself up, forced myself to run, almost crashing into the man, but his hands shot out in time to stop me.

            “Did I make it in time?” I said passed heavy breaths.

            “That you did, kiddo. Even have some time to spare.”

            “Good.”

            Maybe I could handle these tests after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really love writing Eren as he is in the manga. It's taking me a bit to get used to, but hopefully I will master it soon, so I won't have to continue to correct myself several times during the process of writing. I'm very used to writing Eren as I did in my other fic, but I think I'm getting into the groove of things with Eren in this fic.
> 
> Anyway, before I start to blabber anymore, I hope you guys are enjoying this fic so far. Thanks so much for reading. ❤


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to get excited, because the storyline is finally picking up! Whoo! I love writing, and Levi and Eren together is just bliss to write. You guys have no idea, or maybe you do. Either way, before I start to ramble, go on and read. :)

My arm was killing me, and I still had four men surrounding me. This second test consisted of me taking down a small group of men, to be the last one standing. I had done well so far, but now my arm was giving me trouble. At this point, it was pointless to try to use it. I had to make due with using my left arm only.

            I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, turning my head to the side to spit out a mouthful of blood. One of the guys had landed a good punch on my bottom lip, splitting it open. If I made it out of here, I was going to look like shit. There would be a lot to explain once I got back home.

            The remaining four men closed in on me, and I smiled at them, egging them on. I didn’t have a lot of leg space as it was. Being stuck in a narrow alley wasn’t helping me at all. It was doing just fine for them, though, seeing as I couldn’t run anywhere without crashing into one of them.

            “Come on,” I said. “What the fuck are you waiting for?” One of the four, a man with short red hair, flung himself at me, and I darted to the side at the last second, whirling around to place my foot on the small of his back. I shoved him forward, getting him out of the way, but another one had already wrapped his arm around my neck, pulling me back.

            “You think you’re so tough, huh?” he said into my ear.

            I dropped all my weight on his arm, causing his knees to buckle under the added pressure of both of us combined. When he fell, I threw myself back, hearing his head crunch against the cement beneath us. His grip loosened, and I stood up.

            “Tough enough,” I said to him, watching the blood seep from his head.

            “You little shit.” Another man came running up to me, crashing into my chest and throwing me back against the brick wall. I felt his fist connect with my cheek. “How do you like that? I won’t let some kid enter our gang.”

            I turned my head to look at him, grinning. “You’re an idiot”—I brought my knee up, ramming it against his lower stomach—“for lowering your guard.” He crumpled forward and I tossed him to the side. There was just one left. That shouldn’t be too hard to take care of.

            “You can forget about taking me down,” the last man said. He had the same haircut as Levi, but it didn’t suit him. “No one beats Auruo.”

            “A what?” Was that actually his name?

            “Auruo,” he said again. “You can’t even pronounce it, can you? Tch. Moron.”

            “I don’t need to pronounce it to knock you out.”

            He smirked. “Come on then. Let’s get this show on the road.”

            I moved towards him, noticing how his eyes focused on my right arm, my weakness. Ah, so he wasn’t as stupid as the others had been. He wasn’t just going to charge me. He was going to approach this tactfully, which meant that I would have to be careful around him.

            “That’s it,” he said. “Come closer.”

            There wasn’t a way to tell if he was all talk, but judging by his stance, and the way he kept track of my movements with his eyes, he was a skilled fighter. I should’ve taken him out first. Now my arm was useless, and I was tired.

            I stopped a few feet away from him, knowing that Levi was somewhere watching us. I couldn’t lose. No matter what, I had to come out of this as the last one standing. I wouldn’t admit defeat until there was nothing left in me able to fight.

            “Make the first move,” I said. “You cocky shit.”

            He barked out a laugh. “As you wish.”

            I waited for him to go for my arm, but that was too predictable. He was going to attack me where he thought I least expected it. So where exactly would that be?

            As I watched him, he raised his fist up, but that was too easy, so it didn’t surprise me when he suddenly kicked me in the side. I teetered to my right, trying to regain my footing, but he wasn’t going to give me the chance. Before I could even straighten out, he rained his fists down on my chest and neck.

            Lifting my good arm up, I tried to shield the oncoming blows as best I could, but he was a lot stronger than he looked. He wasn’t going to stop until I was down for the count. I could feel it in the way he was hitting me. He was holding nothing back.

            A part of me wanted to give in, to let him knock me to the ground, because I was so tired. The only thing that kept me going, beside my stubbornness, was the thought of Levi being disappointed in me. I had to prove to him that I was worthy of joining him, that I could stand beside him as an equal.

            With that thought burning in my mind, I gritted my teeth, blocking Auruo’s next punch. As I did, I grabbed his hand, digging my nails into his flesh, dragging them down toward his wrist. He didn’t look bothered, but I could tell by the strain of his jaw that I had done something unexpected.

            “Not going to work,” he bit out, trying to shake his hand out of my hold, but I couldn’t release him. If I did, I would lose.

            Now that he only had one arm in use, and his attention was on trying to pry his hand out of my grasp, he had left his side unguarded. I couldn’t let this opportunity pass me by. He was already slipping out of my grip. So I shoved his arm up, releasing it to slam my fist against his ribs.

            As he hunched forward, I lifted my arm up, bringing my elbow down on the back of his head with every ounce of energy I could muster. When it connected, he collapsed onto the ground. I waited for him to spring back up, but he just lay there. Maybe I had hit him harder then I thought. But what mattered most was I was done. I had passed the second test.

            “Well,” Levi said from in front of me, seeming to appear out of nowhere. Where had he been this whole time? “That was unexpected.”

            I narrowed my eyes at him. “You were expecting me to lose?”

            “Yes. Auruo is one of my best men.”

            “That may be so,” I said, “but he was stupid enough to think I wouldn’t attack him without the use of my arms.”

            Levi walked up to me, grabbing hold of my injured arm. “This arm is shot. You won’t be able to use it for a few days.”

            I ignored the way his fingers on my skin sent shockwaves up my spine. “I figured. What’s the last test, anyway?”

            “That won’t be necessary any longer.”

            I looked at him. “What do you mean by that?” I had won. Was he disqualifying me for some reason?

            He shrugged, dropping my arm. “All the men agreed that if you could beat Auruo, that there would be no need for the third and final test. You’re in the clear.”

            “That’s it? I’m in your gang now?”

            “Not quite,” he said. “You’ll be able to walk around my turf without any of my men giving you trouble, but if you want to go out on missions with me, you’ll need to prove your loyalty.”

            I leaned back against the wall, exhausted. “How do I do that?”

            His eyes focused on my face. “For starters, you’ll have to obey my rules without complaint, but there’s really no need. Now that you have the approval of my men, Reece won’t move against you.”

            I should have been happy. I should have taken the opportunity and ran straight home, but I couldn’t move from the spot I was in, because I wanted to prove myself to him. I wanted him to see that I could run along side him.

            “What do I need to do?” I asked.

            His eyes widened a bit before his expression of nonchalance returned. “You should go home, kid. You’ve been through a lot these last couple of days.”

            “Reece won’t come after me there?”

            “No,” he said. “And if he tries, I’ll kill him. You’re one of mine now. If he crosses that line, I’ll make sure that he suffers the consequences of defying the rules of the underground.”

            “Wait, so I don’t have to come back here? Won’t your men not approve of me anymore if I just up and disappear?”

            He shook his head. “They know your circumstances. They also know that if you ever show up here, you won’t make a move against them, or me.”

            Why wasn’t I leaving? Why did the thought of never seeing Levi again cause my heart to ache? It didn’t make any sense. I didn’t know him. I knew nothing about him, or his people. Yet I longed to find everything out about him.

            He turned to walk away, but I reached out and caught him by the wrist. “What would I have to do to be a permanent part of your group?”

            “You don’t want that,” he said.

            “What if I do?”

            “No, you don’t.” He looked over at me. “You’ll have to say good-bye to your life in Trost…to your mom. Like I said, you don’t want that.”

            It was true that I didn’t want to abandon my mom, but everything else didn’t matter. Even still, I couldn’t drop everything to come be here with him. I was the only thing my mom had left, so I had to go back.

            I let go of his wrist, surprised to see his grave expression slip. But before I could identify what he was feeling, he turned his back to me.

            “I’ll walk you home,” he said.

            Normally I would have argued, but even though I wouldn’t be able to join him, I wanted to show him that I was capable of obeying without complaint. So I followed him in silence, thinking how I had ended up in this situation in the first place. If it hadn’t been for Isabel, I never would’ve met Levi. I would probably be at home right now, doing homework with Armin.

            I didn’t believe in fate, yet I found myself thinking that there had to be a reason for all this to have happened. It couldn’t end like this. I couldn’t just go back to living the way I had. There were a lot of people in trouble in the underground. Maybe I could help them, and I couldn’t do that sitting at home in luxury.

            “Will I be able to visit her if I choose to stay?” I said in a low voice.

            Levi stopped in his tracks. “Eren listen—”

            I didn’t know why I said it, but I couldn’t help how the words spilled out of my mouth. “I don’t want this to be the last time that I see you. I want to see Isabel and Farlan again, as well. I can’t just go home and live like some rich kid when you and a lot of others are struggling on a daily basis down here.”

            “It’s none of your concern whether we struggle or not,” he said. “I’ll take care of Isabel and Farlan. Trust me on that.”

            “Why won’t you let me help you? I can supply you with food, or with anything that you may need. Just…let me help.”

            He took a step closer to me. “Why do you want to help?”

            “Because I can,” I said. “And if I have the ability to help, I don’t see why I shouldn’t.”

            For the longest time, he just stared at me, like he was willing me to take back what I had just said. But I wouldn’t. Ever since my father had passed away, my mother had inherited a lump sum of money that was just sitting untouched in our bank account. I could help them with their basic needs. What was so wrong with me wanting to do that? Or was he trying to save me from this life?      

            “If you want to help,” he said at last, “I won’t stop you. Not for my sake, but for Isabel’s and Farlan’s. Times have been hard, hard enough for Isabel to go into Reece’s territory in search of food. If it hadn’t been for you, she would be dead right now. You’ve offered more than I could ever repay you.”

            “I don’t need to be repaid. You don’t owe me anything. I told you I want to help. That’s the truth.”

            He sighed, reaching up to brush the pad of his thumb across my cheek. “They did quite a number on you. We should probably get you cleaned up before you go home. We can discuss how you can help tomorrow. You shouldn’t have to give up your life just because you want to help us.”

            I lifted my hand up to take hold of his. He tensed under my touch, but I didn’t let go. “Thank you. You didn’t have to help me.”

            “And you didn’t have to help Isabel. Call it even, kid.”

            We stayed like that for a while, with me feeling my cheeks heat under his fingertips. Why did I always react to him in this way? What was it about him that drew me to him like a moth to a flame?

            “Let’s head back,” Levi said, moving his hand away from my face, not meeting my gaze as he turned away from me. I didn’t say anything more to him. I couldn’t think of anything that would be worth breaking the silence. Right now, I was focusing on walking straight.

            When we reached his house, which was empty, I let him steer me toward an empty chair in the kitchen. I plopped down, my head drooping forward. My entire body was begging me to go to sleep, but I knew that wouldn’t be a smart thing to do. During the fight, I had hit my head, and I was sure that I had a concussion.

            Levi left to go get the same wooden box he had brought out to sew up the wound on my arm. He didn’t really look at me as he began to clean the multiple cuts on my face and neck. What was he thinking? For some reason, I really wanted to know, so I decided to ask. There was no harm in asking, right?

            “What’re you thinking?”

            He glanced up at me, and I almost mumbled how much I liked his eyes, but I had already told him that. “That you’re a very strange kid.”

            I furrowed my brows. “I’m not a kid.”

            “You’re only sixteen.”

            “So? That’s only six years younger than you. That isn’t a big difference.” Why did I compare our ages? Something like that shouldn’t have mattered.

            “So Isabel told you how old I am?” he said. “That shouldn’t surprise me. She can’t keep anything to herself. But I never said six years was a big difference, did I? I just said that you were a kid.”

            “But I’m not.” Then why was I acting like one?

            He clicked his tongue. “If you can take down Auruo, then I don’t see you as just some kid.”

            I whipped my head around when I remembered that we had left Auruo out there in the alley. “We just left him and the others. Are they going to be all right?”

            “Yes. My other men have orders to take care of them. Don’t worry.”

            “Okay,” I said, sagging in relief. Then I realized what he had told me before I changed the subject. “So, I’m not just some kid to you?”

            He smirked, his eyes darting up to meet mine. “You’re all cleaned up. Get up. If we’re going to make it to your house before it gets dark out, we have to leave now.” He came to a stand, not waiting for me to follow him before he walked toward the front door.

            What? He hadn’t even answered my question.

            Using what little strength I had left, I forced myself to get to my feet, trailing after him out of the house. He kept walking, and I couldn’t catch up to him due to my legs feeling like jelly as I made my way down the stairs. After a while, I gave up, just looking at his back as he led me through the part of the underground that was becoming more familiar.

            Even though he had cleaned the cuts on my face and neck, I knew I didn’t look my best. People stopped and stared at us as we reached the outskirts of Trost. Their eyes never left me, taking in my tattered clothing and bleeding arm.

            “Do I look that awful?” I asked, finally catching up to Levi.

            “You’re pretty banged up.”

            I felt my face with my good hand. “Doesn’t feel too bad.”

            “Feel your left eye.”

            I did, running my fingertips over it carefully. I could feel the swell of my eyelid, and knew it must’ve been bruised with how hard that guy had punched me. Now that I was thinking of it, I must’ve had plenty of bruises coloring my face—my neck, too. No wonder people were staring at me.

            “What will your mom think?” Levi said, turning onto my street.

            “She’ll be worried, but won’t think much of it. I get into a lot of fights at school, so this isn’t unusual.”

            “Are you some kind of trouble maker?”

            “It may seem that way to other people, but I get into fights defending people who can’t stand up for themselves. What am I supposed to do? Sit back and watch them get beaten up by people who are taking advantage of their weakness?”

            “No,” he said. “To do so would be as bad as being the enemy.”

            I skidded to a stop, looking over at him, but he wasn’t waiting for me, so I jogged to keep in pace with him. “You don’t seem like such a bad guy Levi.”

            _Now_ he glanced at me, those gray eyes looking directly into mine. “That’s up for you to decide.” He stopped, jerking his chin in the direction of my house. “Your house isn’t too far from here. Go on.”

            “Can I come by tomorrow?”

            “You’re asking permission? You come off as someone that doesn’t listen to anyone, kid.”

            I narrowed my eyes. “That’s not an answer.”

            “Do you need one?”

            “No,” I said, walking passed him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” I thought I heard him chuckle behind me, but when I turned around, he was already halfway down the street. He was a lot faster than he had let on.

            Now that I was alone, the pain running through my body was evident. I would probably fall straight asleep after I took a shower. Tomorrow I had school, but skipping a day sounded necessary. It wasn’t like I could show up to class all bruised and swollen. My school had a need for “properness,” and being purple and blue didn’t fall under that category.

            Once I reached my front door, I slowly pushed it open. There were no lights on, which meant that my mom was up in her room. I walked inside, closing the door behind me as quietly as I could. Then I went upstairs, locking myself in my bathroom, where I finally took a good look at myself in the mirror.

            My left eye was a bulge of purple flesh, and just above my right eyebrow was a deep gash that was still seeping blood. There were multiple cuts along the left side of my face, and my bottom lip was so swollen, it looked twice its size.

            “Shit,” I said under my breath. All this was going to take a while to heal. I’d be looking awful for a good two weeks.

            “Eren! Are you home?”

            “Uh, yeah!” I called back to my mom, walking over to the tub to turn on the water. “Just going to take a quick shower.”

            “Are you all right?” Her voice was coming directly outside the bathroom door. I knew that she wanted to see me, to make sure that I was in one piece, but to say that I was fine would be a lie.

            I fumbled out of my clothes, wincing as the fabric of my shirt dragged across my right arm. “I’m fine.”

            “Eren, tell me if you’re hurt. You didn’t come home last night, and the last time that happened, you had been roughed up at school.”

            I leaned against the wall, hating to have to lie to her, but she couldn’t know why I looked the way I did. “I’m okay, Mom. I swear. Shouldn’t you be in bed? You haven’t been feeling well.”

            “I’ve been feeling better since you brought me those herbs,” she said. “I’ve been boiling them in with my tea. I’m running low, as a matter of fact.”

            “I’ll get you more.”

            She sighed. “Eren, I know you’re not going to tell me what’s wrong, but…you can’t keep getting yourself hurt to help people. You can’t save everyone.”

            I didn’t know how to respond to that, so instead I stepped into the tub, turning on the showerhead. The scalding hot water washed over my body, and I watched it run red as the dried up blood on my skin became moist once again.

            I couldn’t save everyone, but I was going to save whom I could.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you feel the connection growing? Because I sure can, and it's making me want to squeal! Yes, I am a hardcore Ereri/Riren shipper, and whenever they start showing feelings towards one another (even in my stories) I turn into a fangirl. xD
> 
> Anyhoo, thank you for the comments, kudos, and subscriptions. You guys are total babes! I'm glad you're enjoying my fic so far. ❤
> 
> If you'd like to reach me, I am @levi.eren_ on Instagram, and warriorflesh on tumblr.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a little bit longer to update, I've been so busy lately, which is why I haven't responded to comments. I'm sorry, but I read them all, and I truly appreciate them.
> 
> I hope you guys' enjoy this chapter, so go on and read. :)

The next morning, I left my house before the sun was even up. My mom was an early riser, and I didn’t want her getting a good look at my face. Today it looked a lot worse. It was hard to see out of my left eye, but that didn’t bother me much. So long as she was safe from Reece’s men, the wounds I had endured were worth it.

            At this hour, there wasn’t much I could do, but I wanted to follow through with what I had told Levi last night, so I made my way to a grocery store. Every month, I received an allowance from my mom. I hardly used any of it, seeing as I didn’t want or need much, but now I had a good use for it.

            Once I got there, I walked around the store, grateful that it wasn’t busy this early in the morning. The last thing I needed was for people to stop and stare at me. Though the ones I did come across did just that.

            Since I didn’t have a car, I couldn’t get much. I settled for buying a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, things that could be used to make a suitable dinner for three. After I paid, I began the long walk to the underground, my hands full of bags. I couldn’t stay out until nightfall today. The school would call my mom by mid-afternoon, so I had to be back before then.

            By the time I reached Levi’s house, my legs could barely hold me up. They weren’t up for dealing with my shit today, not after everything I had done yesterday. Still, I forced myself up the steps to his front door, not giving in to the ache in my limbs until after I knocked.

            The door swung open almost right away, and Isabel took one look at me before she reached out and took the bags. “Come inside,” she said, holding the door open for me as I walked passed her. There weren’t any seats in the small living room, so I went into the kitchen, where I blushed violently when I saw Levi was there making breakfast, shirtless. “Look who came to pay us a visit, Big Bro!”

            At that, Levi turned around with a spatula in hand. “Aren’t you supposed to be in school right now?”

            I stumbled to the nearest chair, sagging into it. “Uh, I couldn’t exactly go in looking like this. I would just get sent home for being distracting.” 

            “Wow,” Isabel said while digging through the bags. “A snobby bunch must run your school. Hey, did you bring this food for us?”

            I nodded. “Yeah. I couldn’t bring a lot, because I don’t have a car, but I can bring a little every day.”

            Isabel pulled out an apple, running to the sink so she could rinse it off. When she dried it on her shirt, she took a big bite out of it, smiling as she chewed loudly.

            “Close your mouth,” Levi demanded, flipping over whatever he was making in the skillet.

            “Don’t be a grump.” Isabel came to sit next to me, leaning over to kiss my cheek. “Thank you. These are yummy.”

            As I looked over at her, I saw that Levi was staring at us. I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea, so I scooted my seat away from Isabel’s, hoping that I got the message across to him. I wasn’t interested in her. I wasn’t sure if I was interested in anyone.

            He returned to cooking up his breakfast, ignoring us for the time being. I took the opportunity to scan him from head to foot, taking note of the snug black pajama bottoms he was wearing. They hung low on his waist, exposing his hipbones and a V of muscle that made my lower stomach squirm in response.

            “Are you gay?” Isabel asked suddenly.

            “W-What?!” I caught Levi’s gaze as he turned in response to what she had said. “No! Why?”

            She shrugged. “You’re looking at Big Bro funny. Like you find him attractive. It doesn’t matter if you do. I won’t hold it against you.”

            “I don’t,” I stammered, hating how my cheeks were flooding with warmth. “Find him attractive, that is.” Right? Sure, he had a nice body, but that didn’t mean I was attracted to him. We were both guys’, after all. I wanted to run along side him, be his equal—not date him. Isabel didn’t know what she was talking about.

            She narrowed her eyes at me. “Whatever you say. As for him”—she jerked her thumb at Levi—“he’s as gay as they come.”

            At that, he walked over to the table, tipping the contents that were in the skillet onto a white plate. “Eat up and shut up.”

            Isabel set the apple off to the side, picking up the fork on the plate to chow down on an abundance of eggs. As she was eating, my mind was mulling over the fact that Levi was gay. Was she just messing around with me? That could be the case. After all, she thought that I was attracted to him. Obviously she was trying to pull some type of reaction out of me, but it wasn’t going to work.

            “You kind of look like crap right now,” she told me passed a mouthful of food. “I can see why you skipped school.”

            “Don’t encourage him to miss classes.” Levi pulled out a chair opposite mine, setting down a mug full of steaming hot tea on the tabletop. He sat down, picking up the mug in the same odd way he had done yesterday morning. I watched him, amazed at how he didn’t spill any. “What?”

            I jolted, both embarrassed and startled that I had been caught staring yet again. “It’s nothing. I was just surprised that you aren’t spilling any of your tea with how you’re holding the cup.”

            Isabel laughed. “Everyone asks him that. I don’t know how he does it, either. I made a mess on my shirt when I tried.”

            Levi pushed the mug over to me. “Go ahead and try.”

            “Huh?”

            He rolled his eyes. “Try. I can tell you want to.”

            “Do it,” Isabel said. “He never lets anyone drink out of his cup. I need to see this to believe it’s happening.”

            “Uh,” I mumbled. “Okay.” I grabbed the mug from the top, slowly lifting it to my lips. I tried gradually tipping it sideways, but it was hard to do it without the tea spilling out onto my chin. “You make it look so easy.” I wiped my chin with the back of my hand, giving up. If I kept trying, I was going to end up with the tea on the front of my shirt, instead of in my mouth.

            “I’ve been doing it for a long time,” he said, taking back his cup. Isabel watched him with eyes as wide as saucers as he took a drink from it. His eyes flicked over to her. “What? Stop staring and eat the rest of your eggs.”

            She pointed to him. “You drank after someone. You _never_ drink after anyone. Is the apocalypse scheduled for today? Are pigs flying?”

            He didn’t even bother responding to her, just kept sipping his tea as he looked uninterested in us. Was it true that he never let anyone drink from his cup? If so, why had he let me? It wasn’t a big deal, or anything. I was just curious.

            To distract myself from my confusing thoughts, I asked, “Where’s Farlan?”

            “Out grabbing more food,” Isabel said, poking my arm with her finger. “We don’t have a lot, but thanks to you, we’ll be able to have a good dinner tonight. We can make soup. Yes! I haven’t had soup in a while. Are you going to stay? You should stay. It’s only right since you brought us the ingredients to make it with.”

            I leaned back in the chair. “I can’t stay that long. I have to be back at my house by noon.”

            She pouted. “That’s too bad.”

            I was about to say something when suddenly Farlan came strolling in through the front door. He was carrying a brown paper bag, and didn’t seem to be paying much attention to anything but that.

            “Okay,” he said, peering down into it. “I managed to snag a couple pieces of bread. That should hold us up for tonight. It’s not much, but—” He finally looked up, spotting me. “Oh, hey Eren. Didn’t think I’d see you around these parts anymore.”

            “He brought us food!” Isabel squealed. “There are two loaves of bread, and a bunch of fruits and vegetables. Oh! We should probably put those in the fridge.” She stood up, gathering up the bags of groceries I had brought in her arms.

            Farlan walked over to the fridge with her, staring at the food as she placed it on the racks. “That was really thoughtful of you, Eren.”

            “It’s no big deal, really.”

            “It’s a big deal to us,” he said. “Food isn’t easy to come by down here, so thank you.”

            “You’re welcome.”

            For the rest of the morning, Isabel talked to me about the things she did on a daily basis. Turns out that she hadn’t gone to school, and couldn’t read. According to her, she didn’t find the knowledge of reading that important, because she didn’t think she would have any use for it in the underground, but Levi was determined to teach her on his spare time.

            “Is reading even fun?” she asked me, flipping through the pages of one of Farlan’s books. The front cover was missing, and the spine was barely holding up, but it was good enough.

            “Depends on what book you read,” I told her. “There are a lot of different genres. What do you like? Mystery? Horror? Romance?”

            She leaned her chin on her hand, looking dazed. “Romance.”

            “Well, there are tons of books about that stuff.”

            “Do you have a girlfriend, Eren?”

            I shook my head. “No. I don’t have time for a girlfriend. I don’t really want one, either.”

            “I see,” she said, sliding off the chair to lie down on the floor. “I want a boyfriend. I think it’d be nice. Plus, I really want to kiss someone.” She flipped around onto her stomach, propping herself up on her elbows to look up at me. “Have you kissed someone?”

            “Yeah. It’s not that great.” To be honest, I hadn’t really _kissed_ someone. It was more of a pecking session, and it wasn’t under the best of circumstances. Mikasa had barely broken up with her boyfriend when she decided to up and kiss me. It was something we never talked about.

            “I don’t believe you.” She sat back on her heels. “Hey! Want to be my first kiss? We can practice with each other.”

            Kissing Isabel didn’t sound appealing. She was pretty and all, but the thought of having her tongue in my mouth made my stomach twist in an unpleasant way. This was how it always was when someone came onto me. There was no desire to return their feelings, or to even give them the time of day. I wasn’t interested in anyone.

            When I didn’t answer her, she said, “Never mind. I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”

            “It’s not that you’re pressuring me. I just think your first kiss should be with someone you like. Do you like anyone?”

            She shook her head. “Not really. There aren’t a lot of people my age in the underground, and the guys’ who are run with Reece.”

            “I see. Well, maybe one day you can get out of here.”

            She looked off to the side, seeming sad by what I had said. “That’s not going to happen for me. I won’t be able to get a job. Even if I look presentable, once they see that I live in the underground, they won’t hire me. And without a steady income, there is no way that I can save up enough money to get out of here.”

            Is that how it was for all of them? At one point, had they all tried getting out of this place, but were unable to? I thought about Levi and Farlan, seeing how they had taken full responsibility for Isabel, and took care of her needs. They didn’t deserve to live out the rest of their days in a place like this.

            “I’ll help you get a job,” I said. “We’ll start off by teaching you how to read. Do you know how to write?”

            “A little.”

            “Well, the next time I come, I’ll bring over some supplies, okay?”

            She nodded, smiling. “Okay. Thanks, Eren. I… You don’t even know us, yet you’ve been so kind. I know it’s a selfish thing to say, but I’m glad that you saved me from Reece. If I hadn’t been in that mess, we never would’ve met you.”

            Before I could say anything to her, a knock at the front door caught both of our attention. Isabel didn’t move to get up, and I saw why once Farlan went over and answered it.

            “What is it?” he asked a man with shaggy blonde hair.

            “It’s Reece. He…killed one of our men. Hung him up on a light post for everyone to see. He’s making an example out of him. He wants Levi’s attention.”

            Farlan balled his right hand into a fist, his face contorting into a mask of anger. “Well, he’s got it. Who was it, Mason?”

            Mason dropped his eyes. “Lee.”

            “That fucking bastard!” Isabel shouted, getting to her feet. “Lee has a family! Why would he use him of all people? I’ll kill him! I’ll show him that he can’t mess with our people.”

            “Sit down,” Farlan said in a stern voice. “You’re going to stay here. Eren.” I looked up at him, caught by surprise. “Go get Levi.”

            “Okay.” I got to my feet, ignoring the pain in my legs. Then I walked out to the washroom, knocking on the door when I got there. When Levi opened it, he peered at me like I was disturbing him. I said, “Farlan wanted me to come and get you. It seems that one of your men was murdered by Reece.”

            His eyes narrowed. “Did they say who?”

            “Lee.”

            “Shit,” he said, moving passed me. “Go home, Eren.”

            I spun around, following after him into the house. “I can help.”

            “No, you can’t. You still haven’t recovered from yesterday’s tests, and even if you had, I wouldn’t allow you to come. You’re not ready. Let’s hope that you’ll never be.”

            “But—”

            “But nothing,” he snapped. “Go home.” He walked up to Farlan. “I want four men standing guard outside of the house. Isabel is to stay here. I also want two men escorting Eren out of the underground. After he’s out, we’ll make our move. Is that understood?”

            Farlan nodded once. “I’ll go tell the men.” With that, he left the house, and Levi went into his bedroom. When he came back out, he was no longer dressed in casual wear, but all black, sporting the same trench coat he had been wearing yesterday.

            “You’ll let the men escort you without complaint,” he said, staring at me as though he was waiting for my retort, but I wasn’t going to argue with him. I knew how serious this situation had become. A man died because Levi had helped me, and now he was going to be putting himself, as well as a lot of his men, at risk. If there wasn’t anything I could do for him here, then the least I could do was obey his request.

            A few minutes later, two men knocked on the door, and I followed them out of the house in silence. It was true that my body hadn’t recovered from yesterday’s events. With how I was feeling, I wouldn’t be of much use, but one day I would be ready. Whether Levi liked it or not, I wasn’t going to return living as I had before I helped Isabel. They were struggling down here, and if there was a way for me to help them get out, then I would do it.

            “So you’re the kid that passed the tests with flying colors, huh?” the man I recognized as Mason asked. “None of us beat all those tests. The only one before you was Levi.”

            I looked up at him. “If you didn’t pass, then how are you a part of his gang?”

            He laughed. “It’s not some privilege to be a part of a gang down here. If you’re willing to get back up after you’ve been beaten, then you’re good enough for Levi. Of course that was before his reputation, but even now, if you’re willing to fight, he’ll let you have a place amongst him.”

            “He doesn’t even want me to stick around.”

            “That’s because he’s trying to save you,” Mason said. “If I were you, I’d never come back here. You have a life that all of us want. Don’t just throw it away.”

            “I’m not throwing it away. I want to help.”

            He sighed. “You don’t realize what you’re getting mixed up in. This is some serious shit. You can die down here, and no one will care, because we’re considered trash, disposable—worse than scum.”

            “I don’t see you that way.”

            “So I’ve noticed. But do yourself a favor, and stay away from this place. Reece wants you on his side. If you think he’ll stop at Lee, you’re wrong. He wants to make a point, and it won’t be long until he strikes where it’ll hurt you, or Levi, the most.”

            I thought of Isabel sitting back at the house. Would Reece go after her again? Farlan? Or would he go straight for Levi?

            No, I couldn’t let this happen. If he hurt anyone else on account of me not joining him, I’d do something to get _my_ point across. I wasn’t going to be a part of his gang. For him to not accept that, and hurt people, was something that sickened me to my very core.

            “This is where we part ways,” Mason said, stopping right before the underground ended. “You shouldn’t come back here, but you seem just as stubborn and determined as Levi, so I’m betting I’ll be seeing you around.”

            “Yeah, definitely bet on that.”

            I couldn’t believe I was going to be safe at home while Levi and Farlan were going up against Reece’s men. I knew that they had done something like this before, that they were far more experienced than I was, but still, I wanted to help them. If only I wasn’t all beaten up, then maybe I could’ve convinced Levi to let me stay behind. Maybe then I could’ve been of some use.

            It took me quite a while to get home, and when I did, I had completely forgotten that I had skipped classes. My mom was quick to remind me of this, though, as she stood in the entryway glaring at me the second I shut the front door behind me.

            “Hey,” I said, realization hitting me.

            Her eyes widened as she scanned my face. “What happened to you?” She stepped up to me, grabbing my chin to tilt my head every which way. “I’ve had enough of this, Eren. I’m tired of you coming home looking like this.”

            I yanked my head out of her grasp. “I’m fine. Doesn’t even hurt.”

            “That’s not the point. The point is you shouldn’t be getting into fights on a regular basis. That’s not what I want for you, and now you’re skipping classes… That’s the last straw. If you weren’t at school, then where were you?”

            “Just wandering around.”

            The stern look on her face wavered, and then disappeared completely as it gave way to an expression of exhaustion. “I volunteered to help out at the hospice this afternoon. Please promise me that you’ll stay home while I’m gone, and that you won’t go in search of trouble.”

            “I don’t search for it,” I said. “And I promise.”

            She leaned up on tiptoes to kiss my forehead. “I love you, Eren. Please, take care of yourself.” She opened the front door, leaving me with a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. She didn’t deserve to have such an awful son like me, one that was constantly getting into trouble. But I couldn’t help the way that I was, and I wasn’t about to change. It was downright impossible for me to turn a blind eye to the situation I was now in. I would continue to help Levi and the others. Of that, I was positive.

            Hours passed slowly, with me lying on the living room couch, flipping through channels. I must’ve dozed off, because when someone rang the doorbell, I jumped up in surprise, falling off the couch.

            “Coming!” I called out, getting to my feet.

            I didn’t know whom I was expecting to find on the doorstep, maybe Armin, or even Mikasa, but when Levi and Isabel were standing there holding Farlan up between them, I gaped at the blood coursing down his chest.

            “Come in,” I said, stepping aside to let them trudge into the entryway.

            “This was our last option,” Levi said. “We can’t take him to the hospital. He has a criminal record. They’d send him to jail in a heartbeat, and we were out of supplies, so…”

            “You don’t have to explain. My room is down the hall, last door on your right.”

            I took over for Isabel, slinging Farlan’s arm over my neck, trying to take on as much of his weight on me. He was unconscious. “What happened to him?”

            “Reece ordered his men to take him out. He was the only one they were going after. I should’ve known. I should’ve…” He gritted his teeth.

            I didn’t like the look on his face, so I tried distracting him. “My mom volunteers at a hospice, so she has a lot of supplies here at home. Go lay him down, and I’ll be down with them.”

            “Okay.” He shouldered all of Farlan’s weight, as I unwound his arm from around my neck. Then I made my way up to my mom’s room, throwing her door open and hoping that she had some type of pain meds.

            I scoured her medicine cabinet, sighing in relief when I saw a prescription bottle for Percocet. It would ease some of Farlan’s pain, which was enough for me to steal them. My mom would find out, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. I’d deal with the consequences later.

            With the pills and numerous medical supplies in hand, I went back down to my room, shutting the door behind me. “Here,” I said to Levi, handing him the painkillers. “Have him take two.”

            After Farlan swallowed down the pills, Levi and I worked together to remove his shirt. That’s when I saw that he had been stabbed in his left pectoral. It was deep, and judging by the amount of blood, he needed medical attention.

            “He needs to go to the hospital.”

            “He can’t,” Levi said.

            “Fine. I’m calling my mom. She can handle this a lot better than I can.”

            “Will she call the police?” He grabbed my wrist, looking me in the eyes.

            I shook my head. “Not if I ask her not to.”

            For a long while, he just stared at me, and then he nodded. “Go on.”

            I left the room, hoping that we weren’t too late. 

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you guys' catch on that both Levi and Farlan gave up breakfast for Isabel to eat their remaining food? Ugh, it hurts. It also hurts what happened to Farlan, but…it was a necessary course of action. *cries*
> 
> Anyway, thank you guys so much for the comments, the kudos, and the subscriptions. I'm glad you are enjoying my fic, and that you like my writing. ^-^
> 
> P.S. Eren is stubborn, if you didn't notice that already. He's in denial that Levi is becoming his, whispers, "Sexual awakening." ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fast as hell update, because I'm an insomniac who stayed up till four in the morning, and decided to write this chapter instead of just moping about. So, yes, chapter six is here, and I really like this chapter. Or, I like where it's leading.
> 
> Thank you guys for reading so far. You guys are da best! :)

My mom didn’t even spare a glance in my direction as she made her way into my room after I had called her up at the hospice. I had explained the situation in detail, so she knew why my face was a swollen mess. I knew she was angry, but right now her main priority was Farlan, who had been in and out of consciousness since we laid him down. Whenever he was awake, he would try to act normal, but there was no way for him to hide the evident pain he was feeling.

            If ever a whimper or groan of discomfort left his lips, Isabel would break down in sobs. She stood next to the bed, holding his hand. Despite his severe wound, he kept trying to comfort her. Reaching up to brush the hair out of her face.

            “Don’t die,” she pleaded, tears glistening on her cheeks. “Not you. Please. Not you, Farlan.”

            He smiled, but it quickly turned into a wince.

            This was painful to watch, and I hadn’t even known him that long. Even though Levi stood in the corner with no expression on his face, I could see the agony in his eyes as he watched over Farlan from where he stood.

            “How long ago did this happen?” my mom asked, turning to Levi.

            “At least an hour ago,” he responded.

            “He’s lost a lot of blood. We have to take him in. If he doesn’t get the proper treatment, he will bleed out.”

            Farlan glanced over at Levi. “Let me—” He cringed, squeezing his eyes shut as a wave of pain overtook him. When he recovered, he finished. “Die. Let me die. I don’t want to go to jail for the rest of my life.”

            “No!” Isabel screamed. She grabbed both my mom’s hands, giving her a pleading look. “Don’t let him die. Please don’t let him die. Isn’t there a way he can receive treatment without alerting the police? I don’t know you. I hardly know your son, but he’s helped us. I’m begging you to do the same. Farlan isn’t a bad guy. He just grew up in a shitty place. There’s no way to live in the underground without stealing and defending yourself.”

            “It’s true,” I said, coming to her defense. “I’ve only been down there three times, and I already know that. Mom, please. They helped me. If there’s a way to help them, please do it. If he dies, he’ll die because of me. And if that happens, I’ll take matters into my own hands.”

            At that, her eyes darted over to me. “Eren—”

            “I won’t let his blood be on my hands. I’ll avenge his death, if he dies. You can’t stop me, either.”

            She stared at me for a number of seconds before she said, “There are a few doctors at the hospice that will help me. It will be tricky to get him in unseen, but it can be done. Now help me get him out to my car. He needs to go in right away.”

            Levi and I quickly lifted him up, bearing his weight as we walked through the hallway to get to the front door. Isabel opened it up for us, keeping in pace beside us as we hurried to my mom’s truck, which was parked in the driveway. How had they made it all the way out here earlier without being seen? It was obvious what had happened to Farlan. With just one look at him, people would be able to see that he was severely injured.

            “Get the back door,” I told Isabel, who jumped on the task, swinging the door open. We slid him in the backseat as gently as we could, but he was no longer conscious, and that made me more worried than if he were awake and in pain.

            Isabel crawled into the foot space beneath the bench seat, running her fingers through Farlan’s hair as she looked at his face. She turned her head to regard me. “You asked me who I liked earlier, remember? I said that I didn’t like anyone, but I was lying. I’ve been in love with Farlan for years. I may just be some kid to him, but I don’t even care about that right now. Thank you, Eren. Thank you for everything you’re doing.”

            I didn’t know what to say, so I simply nodded, closing the door to hop into the bed of the truck. Levi was already in there, his back pressed against the tailgate.

            “Aren’t you going to ride up front?” he asked me.

            “I can’t face my mom right now.”

            “I can see why. The stunt that you pulled back in the room wasn’t a smart one.”

            I brought my legs up, burying my face in my folded arms. “It wasn’t a stunt. If Farlan were to die, I’d kill Reece myself.”

            “Do you think I’d let you do that?”

            I lifted my head up to look at him. “Do you think you could stop me?”

            We stared at each other for what felt like a long time, and there was something there between us that I couldn’t identify. It was something that I had never felt before, but I wanted to know every little thing about him, and vice versa. I wanted him to feel comfortable with me, to trust me. And I would do anything to gain his trust.

            The truck started up, and my mom backed out of the driveway, speeding down empty streets to get to the hospice that was a fifteen-minute drive away. All the while, I kept hoping that Farlan would pull through, that nothing would happen to him on the way there. He had to make it.

            My mom parked in front of the double automatic doors, shutting off the engine to hop down from the driver’s seat. “I’ll be back,” she said to me. “I need to let them know what’s going on before we bring him in.”

            Time seemed to stop as we waited for her to return, and with each passing minute, I grew more and more afraid that Farlan was closer to his death. It had already been too long. Every second was precious and not to be wasted, so I sighed in relief when my mom came running back out with two men right beside her. They were quick to get Farlan into the hospice, and as we went to follow, my mom turned around to block us.

            “You can’t come in,” she said. “None of you have relatives here. It will look suspicious if you’re here. This place is monitored at all times.”

            “We can’t just leave,” Isabel said.

            My mom focused her attention on me. “Take them back to the house. I’ll call you the second I get news. Understand?”

            There was no point in arguing with her. I knew she had a point in keeping us out, so I said, “Yeah, I understand.”

            Levi didn’t say anything as he got back into the truck. Isabel wouldn’t keep quiet, sobbing in the backseat. I couldn’t focus on anything but the fact that I had to drive home. I didn’t have a license, and had failed the drivers test, but I put what knowledge I had to use.

            “Have you driven before?” Levi asked from the passenger seat as I pulled out onto the main road.

            “Not really,” I confessed.

            “Well, let’s hope that you don’t get pulled over.”

            My grip tightened around the steering wheel as I coaxed the truck to stay in the center of the white dotted lines on either side of it. “Thanks for the boost of confidence.”

            To my surprise, I made it home without crashing. But the happiness I felt died away as soon as it came. There were a lot of things that could go wrong with the situation we were in. For one, Farlan could lose his life. Also, if the doctors my mom had trusted decided to turn him in, there would be no saving him from the law.

            Once we were inside my house, none of us could settle down. Even Levi couldn’t keep still, pacing back and forth across the living room. Eventually, Isabel nodded off on the couch, clutching one of the throw pillows against her chest. She had cried herself to sleep, and I thought about what she had told me before we left for the hospice. She was in love with Farlan. If he died today, how would that affect her?

            “How old is he?” I asked, my voice sounding too loud in the silence that had consumed us.

            Levi stopped his pacing to face me. “Nineteen.”

            I cringed. He was so young. He couldn’t die like this. “Reece isn’t going to stop, is he?”

            “No.”

            “He’ll come after me next. He’ll hurt someone I love, like my mom.”

            “Yes.”

            “You said there were rules that you had to abide by in the underground,” I said. “He isn’t following them anymore, so then the only way he’ll stop is if I join him.”

            He sighed, sitting down on the arm of the couch. “If you never returned to the underground, he won’t do anything to you. He may send some of his men out, like he did the last time, but it’s too risky for him to enforce violence out here in Trost.”

            “So, what your saying is he’ll keep attacking your people, but I’ll be safe if I stick to Trost?”

            “Yes. I kept you from joining him, so now he’s holding a grudge against me. Isabel will be next, and if Farlan happens to survive this, Reece won’t hesitate to finish him off.”

            I gritted my teeth. “No. I won’t let him do it.”

            “To act against him would be idiotic, Eren. No matter what, someone will die. It’s best if you just stay here and forget all about the underground.”

            “And abandon you? He’ll end up killing you too, if he takes out enough of your men. Do you honestly think I’ll just stand back and let that happen?”

            “Why wouldn’t you? Put aside your pride for one second, and think about yourself for once. You’ll be throwing away your life, a life that you shouldn’t be taking for granted. Stop this nonsense of trying to help us. There is no helping us. We’re stuck in that shitty place till the day we die. That’s just the way things are.”

            “I refuse to accept that,” I said. “I won’t just leave you to die.”

            “Why not?” His voice rose and he looked angry. “I mean nothing to you.”

            “That’s not true! Ever since I saw you, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you! You’re a fucking constant thought in my head.” I tapped my temple with my finger, finally realizing what I had just said, what I had just confessed.

            He stood up, narrowing his eyes at me. “What game are you playing here, Eren? Do you think this is a joke? Living in the underground is not something you should be striving for. Everyone there is yearning to get out, and here you are, so stupid and eager to be there.”

            “It’s not that,” I murmured. “I don’t want anyone to die because of me. I don’t want _you_ to die because of me.”

            “It’s bound to happen, anyway. Do you think I’ll live till I’m old and gray? One day someone will overpower me, and that’ll be the end of it. I’ve already accepted my fate, Eren. You should do the same. Let this go. Live out your life the way you should. After tonight, you should forget all about the underground.”

            Words bubbled up in my throat, and there was no way for me to stop them as they spilled out of my mouth. “It’s not the underground that I won’t be able to forget. Every time I look at you, I get this…strange feeling in my chest. It’s like my heart can’t decide whether it wants to pick up speed, or stop altogether. I don’t even know you, yet I have this desire to know everything about you. I… Shit. Forget it. I don’t need your fucking permission. I won’t let anyone die over me. Let alone you.”

            He crossed the room so fast, I couldn’t even react as he pushed me against the wall. My back hit it with force, my arm screaming in protest as he gripped it with a bruising hold. “Are you a fucking idiot?”

            “Maybe I am,” I said. “Why the fuck do you care?”

            “I’m trying to save your skin, kid, and you’re so determined to get yourself killed.”

            “I’m not eager to die.”

            “Sure seems that way to me.”

            I lifted my good arm up, using it to shove him back. “Fuck you. You don’t know anything about me. You want to know why I’m like this? My dad was killed two years ago. He had just ended his shift at the hospital, and it was around four in the morning when he was mugged at the train station. There were people there, but nobody helped him! If someone would’ve helped him, he might still be alive. So that’s why I can’t just sit back and watch people get hurt, because I know they mean something to someone.” I stepped closer to him. “People on the outside might see you and Isabel and Farlan as trash, but you mean everything to each other, right? _That’s_ why I won’t turn away.”

            He glared at me, clenching his teeth, visibly straining his jaw. “We shouldn’t matter to you.”

            “Well, you do.”

            “You’re not going to give up, are you?”

            “No,” I said, noting how he hadn’t even commented on how I had practically confessed to liking him. Fuck, this whole situation was insane. Why did I have to realize my feelings when were stuck in this mess?

            “Shut up,” Isabel groaned, startling the both of us. “You guys are so loud. Just kiss already and shut up.”

            I gaped at her, crossing my arms over my chest, or trying to—my right arm felt too heavy to lift. “We’re not going to kiss.”

            She rolled over to look at me. “You should. The sexual tension building between the two of you is nauseating.”

            “What?” I fumbled with words that I couldn’t even begin to form. “We’re not… There’s no sexual tension!”

            “Really?” She sat up, rubbing her puffy eyes. “Big Bro has jacked off every night since you showed up with your pretty as hell Caribbean eyes. The walls are thin, buddy.”

            I turned to Levi, who refused to acknowledge my presence.

            “That has nothing to do with this,” Levi said, his voice strained. “Call your mom already, Eren. We’ve been waiting here for hours.”

            I couldn’t even begin to grasp how we ended up on this note, but I just nodded, leaving the room to call my mom. She didn’t pick up, and after calling her another two times, I knew that she wasn’t going to. Was Farlan okay? Could they still be working on him? Or did something bad happen?

            When I walked out into the living room, the awkwardness was tangible. I could cut through its thickness with my hand. “She’s not picking up.”

            “Is that good or bad?” Isabel asked, looking on the verge of tears again. “Do you think he’s okay, Eren?”

            “I honestly don’t know.”

            She gripped the throw pillow, burying her face against it. “I hate this so much. We’re just sitting here while he’s…” She broke off on a sob, her hand clenching around the fabric. “I never told him how I felt. I tried to get him jealous by coming onto you, Eren, and where did that get me? I know I’m young, but… You can’t help who you love, right?”

            As she said that, I caught Levi’s eyes, but I quickly looked away. “I’ll call her again in a few minutes. If she doesn’t pick up soon, we’ll just drive down to the hospice.”

            Isabel nodded, still keeping her face hidden from us.

            I don’t know how much time passed, but when my cell phone went off, I was quick to pick it up. “Mom?” I said as soon as I answered. “Is he okay?”

            “He’s stable,” she said. “He’s still not in the clear, but we’ve done all we can do for him. Now all we can do is wait.”

            “Can we go see him?”

            “It’s best if you don’t. He’s hidden in a backroom, and is being monitored by nurses that I trust. Right now the smartest thing to do is keep a low profile. Stay home, Eren. If you want, you can have Levi and Isabel stay, too. But don’t you dare go back to the underground. Do you understand me? I did what you asked of me, now for once in your life, don’t defy me.”

            I knew that I wouldn’t be able to keep my word for long, but for right now, I could. “Okay. Keep us up to date, and thank you for doing this Mom.”

            She sighed into the receiver. “Anything for you, Eren. Now you should get some rest. Farlan is fast asleep and if he wakes up, I’ll call you.”

            “All right. I’ll be waiting for your call.” I hung up, and turned to Levi and Isabel, who were staring at me, waiting for me to inform them on what my mom had just told me. “He’s stable for now, and if anything changes, she’ll call me.”

            “I’ll be back in the morning, then,” Levi said. “Isabel, stay here. You’re safer here, but I can’t leave our house unprotected. I can’t abandon our people.”

            Before I realized what I was doing, I reached out and snatched his wrist. “You can’t go back. Stay here.”

            He jerked his hand out of my grip. “Keep her safe.”

            “She’s not the one that’s at risk.”

            “Good. Keep it that way.”

            Isabel threw the throw pillow off to the side, standing up to take hold of the back of Levi’s trench coat. “Don’t leave me. At least wait until the sun is up.”

            “No.” He snatched his coat out of her grasp. “Nighttime is when he’ll strike.”

            “Let me go with you,” I said.

            His eyes flicked over to my face. “I don’t need you. You’ll just get in my way.”   

            I didn’t expect his words to sting so much, but they did. “I’m not useless.”

            “Prove it. Stay here like I asked you to.”

            “Hold on.” I left the living room before he could protest, going to my bedroom. I walked straight to my dresser, pulling open the first drawer. I dug threw my socks until I felt the cold brass beneath my fingertips, snatching it up into my palm. With the key in hand, I went back out to where Levi stood rigid. His eyes never left mine as I strode up to him. “Here.” I held the key out to him on the black cord chain it hung from.

            “What is this?”

            “Don’t ask questions.” I slung it over his neck, ignoring the weird way he was looking at me. My dad had given me the key a week before he died. He told me that I should carry it around as a token of luck. It was stupid of me to think it would help Levi, but for some reason, I wanted him to have it.

            I waited for him to take it off, or to chuck it back in my face, but he just tucked the key beneath the collar of his shirt.

            “I’ll be back in the morning,” he said.

            “You better be, or I’m going to come looking for you.”

            He didn’t say anything in response, just turned his back to me and strode out of the room. I wasn’t religious, but in that moment, I said a little prayer in my head, hoping that this wouldn’t be the last time that I saw him. I meant what I had said. If he didn’t come back in the morning, I would go looking for him. I wouldn’t abandon him in this.

            “So,” Isabel said once we heard the front door shut, wiping her face with the sleeve of her green shirt. “Still not gay?”

            “I’m not even sure what I am right now.”

            She smiled sadly. “Don’t let him get away. There are no guarantees in life, Eren. If you like him, then fight for him. He’ll try to resist you for as long as possible. That’s just the way he is. He likes to keep people behind the walls he puts up around himself, but you’re already breaking through, and so fast.”

            “But it seems like he hates me.”

            “If he hated you, he would’ve decked you in the face when you put that key around his neck. What was that about, anyway?”

            “For luck,” I said, feeling my heart pound erratically in my chest.

            “Was it only for that? Or does it serve another purpose?”

            I dropped my eyes. “Like what?”

            “Like a reminder of you. Like whenever he feels that key press against his chest, he’ll know that you’re not going anywhere whether he likes it or not.”

            “Maybe,” I whispered.

            Maybe…  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be honest, that ending made me have a little fangirl attack, because Eren is just so cute! Even when I try to write him serious and being a total badass, he still manages to be a total cutie, and it wounds my soul (in a good way). He's my babe, and so is Levi, and them together just makes me cry beautiful, happy tears of joy! 
> 
> The life of a fangirl I lead! OMG! But if you're reading this, then you probably understand. Am I right?? 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading, my beauties. Also, thanks for the comments and kudos. Thou art beautiful! ❤


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I've been super busy yet again, so this update didn't happen as fast as I would have hoped. Obviously 3 days isn't too bad, but I like updating within a couple of days so you, as readers, won't lose the flow of the story.
> 
> So this chapter is basically where the main character, Eren, comes to a crossroads, and has to make a decision that will forever change his life. I like how this story is going so far, and I'm so glad a lot of you are enjoying it, as well.
> 
> So without further ado: go on and read. :)

At exactly six o’clock in the morning, I snapped out of a dreamless sleep. My eyes opened to a hand hovering mere inches above my face. Looking to the side, I saw that that hand belonged to Levi, who was staring down at me as though I had caught him by surprise.

            What had he been doing before I woke up?

            “Did your mom call?” he asked, the expression of indifference once again settling on his face.

            I sat up on the couch, rubbing my eyes. “No.” As my mind cleared from the fogginess of sleep, I noticed that he had several cuts on his face. “What happened?”

            “Nothing too serious. Shouldn’t you go into school? Your face still looks a mess, but I think you should get back to your normal routine.”

            “I don’t have a normal routine.” I stood up, twisting my torso to pop my back. “I’ll call my mom in a minute. If you want to, you can use my bathroom to get yourself cleaned up. Feel free to use anything in there. It’s the one upstairs.”

            I left him standing in the living room, refusing to acknowledge that my heart was pounding way too fast in my chest. He had still been wearing the key I had given him around his neck. Could that be a sign? Or was I reading too much into it? But above all of that, why did it make me happy to see him wearing it?

            As I slipped into the downstairs bathroom, I was finally hit with the realization that I may have feelings for Levi, who was a male…like me. I had never entertained the idea of being homosexual. In fact, it never once crossed my mind. Whenever I was approached by anyone, whether it was by a male or female, I never found any interest in them. It was easy to turn them down. But with Levi, from the very first moment I laid eyes on him, I had felt something indescribable. That is to say: He was the first person I had any interest in beyond a simple friendship.

            Did I like him? I didn’t know that quite yet. All I knew was that I wanted to get to know him. I wanted him to trust me. That didn’t necessarily mean that I wanted anything passed that, right?

            As I took off my shirt, I thought about everything that Mikasa had told me about her crush. She had gone on and on about how he looked, which didn’t seem right to me. For me, liking someone solely for the way they looked was as pointless as pointless could get. Why be with someone just because you find them attractive? How shallow. That relationship couldn’t last, which is why it didn’t surprise me when they broke up.

            Comparing myself to Mikasa was useless. Why was I so drawn to Levi? That was the question I should be trying to answer.

            Completely naked, I started the shower, stepping into the cold spray of water. It hit my chest, running down my bruised body. That’s when I glanced over at my wounded arm, watching the gauze soak up the water droplets until it began to slip down my skin, exposing the gash, which looked disgusting.

            I shut my eyes, turning my head to press my forehead against the tile wall in front of me. Did I really like Levi? Did it even matter that he was a guy? I couldn’t see anything wrong with it. After all, why should my feelings be limited to the female gender just because I was male? That was stupid. At least to me it was.

            When my mind could no longer process everything that was running through it, I began to wash myself, more aware of how beaten up I really was as I scrubbed my limbs clean. Despite what a lot of people thought, I wasn’t some idiot who ran into the face of danger without thinking. I knew the consequences of my actions. Just like I knew that returning to the underground could leave me dead, but that hadn’t stopped me before, and it wouldn’t stop me now. After everything that Reece had done, I was determined to show him that I wasn’t someone he could toy with.

            Once I was done washing up, I dried off, wrapping a towel around my waist. I walked out into the hallway, too caught up in my thoughts to realize that Levi was walking toward me until it was too late. I smacked right into him.

            “Oh,” I said, stepping back right away. “Sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.”

            “So I see.” He crossed his arms over his chest, looking off to the side. “No matter what happens with Farlan, Isabel and I can’t stay here for much longer. We’ll have to return to the underground by tonight. Do you think it’d be possible to convince your mom to let us see him before then?”

            “I can try, but I don’t know how it’ll go.”

            He nodded, finally looking over at me. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for him.”

            “There’s no need to thank me. I want to help him.”

            “Yeah, I figured as much,” he said, his eyes scanning me from head to foot. I fidgeted under his intense gaze, suddenly becoming self-conscious. “You should go get dressed.” And with that, he turned around and walked back down the hallway.

            I hurried to my room the instant he was out of sight, shutting the door behind me. I tried not to think about my racing heartbeat, or the way my skin was prickling with heat. Was this how it felt to like someone? The feeling was strange, completely foreign to me. I wasn’t sure if I liked it. It almost felt like a weakness.

            After I dressed in my school uniform, I went back out to the living room. Instead of looking over at Levi, I sat down next to Isabel on the couch. She scooted closer to me, dropping her head onto my shoulder.

            “I don’t want to go back,” she said under her breath. “Whenever I’m in the underground, it feels like I’m trapped in a cage. The outside world is so near, yet so unattainable. I hate it more than anything. And to think we’ll be leaving Farlan behind just makes me cringe. Promise me you’ll watch after him.”

            “I promise.”

            She stood up. “I guess that’s all I can ask for. I wish there was a way I could stay, but I know that’s impossible.”

            “I haven’t tried calling my mom yet,” I said in a rush, digging into my pocket to retrieve my cell phone. “She might let us go see Farlan now.”

            “Doubtful.” Levi grabbed Isabel by the arm, nodding once. “We’ll try to come back in a couple of days. If we don’t return, then that’s the end of that. We can’t keep coming out to Trost. We don’t belong here.”

            I shot up to my feet, moving to stand in front of him. “Stop saying that! If you keep acting like you’re worthless, then how do you expect people to not think you’re worthless? I’ve only spent a few days with you guys, and already I know that you guys are far from being insignificant. I can talk to my mom. Maybe you guys can stay here and get a normal job—”

            “That’s not possible,” Levi said, cutting me off. “All of us have a criminal record. We wouldn’t be able to get normal jobs.”

            “What?” I tried to grasp onto something that would make him stay, but there was nothing left. If he wanted to leave, I couldn’t do a single thing about it. “If you have a criminal record, then why aren’t you in jail?”

            “We haven’t been caught.” He pulled Isabel toward him. “Do you honestly think cops bother going down to the underground to arrest scum? No. So long as we’re there, they don’t care at all. It’s when we venture out that they care. They know who I am. If I were to be seen by any type of authority, they wouldn’t hesitate to put me behind bars.”

            I thought of my mom sitting at the hospice, and what she had asked of me. I knew going back to the underground would put my life in danger. I knew that it would be safer to stay here and forget all about it, but how could I do that when I knew that because of me, Levi and Isabel’s life were at risk? It’s because of me that they were in this situation to begin with.

            “You said that in order to be a permanent part of your gang, that I’d have to give up my life here in Trost,” I said. “What if I’m prepared to do that right now?”

            Levi let go of Isabel’s arm to shove me back hard enough to make me fall back onto the couch behind me. “I wouldn’t allow it.”

            “And what are you prepared to do to stop me?”

            “Don’t be a fool. Stay here and stop trying to ruin your life.”

            I stood back up, stepping up to him. “Do you think I belong here? I’ve never fit in with the kids at school, because I’m not like them. I can’t just sit back and act like everything is okay. _Nothing_ is okay in this world. You and Isabel are a prime example of how this world is cruel and unfair.”

            “So why do you want to add yourself to that unfairness?” he asked. “Do you think by going with us to the underground you’ll magically solve all our problems? All you’ll do is become another problem I’ll have to deal with. I have enough on my plate as it is.”

            “Do you really believe that I will be of no use if I go with you?”

            “You wouldn’t be useless,” Isabel said, answering me. “That’s not what Big Bro is saying. I know you want to help us, Eren. But if you go back with us, you will regret it one day. Right now, you have the world at your fingertips. You’re lucky enough to have the opportunities that I yearn for. You can get an education, get a good job, and have a family… Don’t give that up for us.”

            They wanted to save me from ruining my life. I knew that. But couldn’t they see that I wanted to do the same for them? They didn’t deserve to be trapped in the underground for the rest of their lives. They didn’t deserve to be treated less than human just because of where they lived.

            I put my hand on Levi’s chest, feeling his heartbeat beneath my fingertips. He looked startled, but didn’t move away. “If I were to cut you in the same spot I cut myself, would we not bleed the same?” I looked into his eyes, grabbing his right hand with my free one to place it on my chest. “Determining the worth of your life based on where you live isn’t right. I can feel your heartbeat, can feel your life source at my very fingertips, and you can feel mine. You’re just as alive as I am, so why is your life any less meaningful than mine? Because I live in Trost, and you live in the underground?”

            “Eren—”

            “I won’t give up on you. If you don’t want me to go to the underground, then I accept that. But in return, you should accept that I will go against your advice to stay here. I can’t, and won’t let you die like your life is meaningless.”

            For the longest time, he didn’t say anything, just stared at me with this look of disbelief on his face. What was he thinking?

            “You’re a bigger idiot than I originally thought,” he said at last, moving away from me, but he looked flustered, confused. “If you return to the underground despite what I have told you, then that’s up to you. But I will not be held responsible for anything that happens to you.”

            As I was getting ready to respond, my cell phone went off on the couch. I went to pick it up, looking down at the screen to see that it was my mom. I hit the answer button right away, bringing the phone up to my ear. “Do you have—”

            “Go to the backyard.” It wasn’t my mom’s voice, but Reece’s on the other end of the line. “Tell Levi that if he does anything stupid, your mom’s pretty little throat will be cut clean open. Do you understand?”

            “Yes,” I said.

            “That’s a good boy. I’ll give you three minutes to relay the message, and then come out back. Don’t keep me waiting too long. I get impatient fast.” He hung up.

            “What’s wrong?” Levi asked, taking in the sudden change of my expression. “Is it Farlan?”

            I shook my head. “It’s my mom.”

            “What about your mom?” He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me. “What is it?”

            “Reece has her out back.”

            “Shit,” he hissed. He went to walk away, but I caught him by the sleeve of his shirt.

            “You can’t do anything. He said that if you try, he’ll…slit her throat.” I swallowed hard. That fucking bastard! If he hurt her, I’d kill him. “You said he wouldn’t come to Trost.”

            Levi yanked his sleeve out of my grasp. “He’s desperate. What all did he say?”

            “That if you do anything stupid, he’ll kill her, and that I have three minutes to relay that message to you before I go out back.”

            “Did he say that you should go alone?”

            “No,” I said.

            He grabbed me by the arm, hauling me out of the living room. “Stay here, Isabel.”

            As he lugged me toward the backdoor, I knew that I wasn’t going to be given a choice. Reece would hurt my mom unless I agreed to join him. There was no other reason for him to risk coming out to Trost and kidnapping her. He wanted me in his gang, even if it was by force. But what would be the point of that? I would never be loyal to him as a leader.

            “What are we going to do?” I asked.

            “Exactly as he says. We may be able to save your mom that way.”

            Fear coursed through my body, but I refused to give into it. I would do whatever Reece asked of me. If that meant that I had to join his gang, then so be it. I wouldn’t let my mom die over that.

            When Levi pulled open the sliding glass door that led to my backyard, I stepped out, freezing in place. Reece had my mom in a chokehold, the tip of a blade against her throat. In that moment, my mom didn’t look afraid. She looked determined, and I knew that she was willing to sacrifice herself for me, but I wouldn’t let it come to that. This may be the last time I ever saw her, but if that secured her safety, then I’d come to terms with it.

            “There you are,” Reece said, his greasy black hair clinging onto his forehead. “I had to go through some trouble to get your mom out here without causing up a stir at that hospice she was at.”

            I tried to stay strong, to not show the dread I felt at seeing that knife pressed at my mom’s throat. In a split second, he could swipe it across her flesh, then she would be gone, and there would be nothing I could do to save her. “What do you want?”

            He chuckled, his beady black eyes moving over to Levi. “Well, ya see, at first I wanted to get you to be one of my men. But seeing as you’ve taken quite a liking to Levi, I knew that would be a stupid move on my part. So, I thought, how is it fair that you get to leave the underground whenever you please without any consequences? You stuck your nose where it didn’t belong that day that you rescued Isabel. Things like that shouldn’t go unpunished. So”—he put his hand on my mom’s forehead, yanking her head back—“I think it’s time to show you that you can’t get away with things like that.”

            “Wait!” I shouted. “I… I’ll do whatever you ask.”

            His eyes gleamed. “Whatever I ask, you say? What if I asked you to kill Levi?”

            “I…” I couldn’t finish the sentence.

            “He’ll do it,” Levi said for me, and my eyes darted over to him. “Is that your request, Reece?”

            Reece threw his head back, laughing. “Oh, Levi, that would be too easy of an end for you. As much as I loathe you, you have earned the right to die as a man. So to die at the hands of some rich kid simply wouldn’t suit you.”

            “Then what do you want?” Levi muttered.

            “I want this kid here to learn his lesson. If he wants to get involved in the mess that is the underground, then he can live in that shit fest along with the rest of us.”

            I stepped forward. “You want me to give up my life here in Trost?”

            My mom’s eyes widened, and she said, “No, Eren. No. I’ve lived my life.”

            “Shut up,” Reece snapped, pressing the tip of the knife into her skin. A single drop of blood ran down the side of her neck, and my eyes locked onto it.

            “I’ll do it,” I said in a rush. “I’ll never come back to Trost. If that’s what you want, that’s what I’ll do.”

            “Prove it, snotty brat. You only passed the preliminary tests. If you truly want to be initiated into Levi’s gang, then he has to prove your worth. Go on, Levi. I don’t have all day.”

            The next thing I knew, Levi’s fist connected with my right cheek. He hit me hard enough to cause me to lose my footing, and I toppled over onto the ground. But before I could make contact with it, he caught the collar of my shirt, yanking me back up to drive his knee against my stomach. I sputtered, hunching over to be hit hard in the face, my vision blurring.

            “ _NO!”_ I heard my mom scream.

            “It’s the only way,” Levi said, bringing his elbow down on the back of my neck, knocking me down onto my knees. “The choice has been made for him.”

            Blood was running down my chin, and I couldn’t see straight, but I fought the urge to collapse and stood back up.

            “That’s it,” Levi murmured. “Prove your worth to him.”

            “Fuck him,” I spat. “I’m proving myself to you.”

            His eyes narrowed, but he punched me again, making me teeter to the side. The pain was overwhelming, unlike anything I’ve ever felt before from mere punches. He was strong, but I knew he was still holding a lot back. I’m sure that if he weren’t, I would have already been knocked out.

            As his knee smashed into my side, I didn’t focus on the pain, or my mother who was screaming as she watched me. I focused on nothing but the way there was no anger in Levi’s eyes, no hatred behind his punches. He was doing this to keep my mom alive, and that was enough for me to stay on my feet.

            Reece’s laughter cut through my peace and I looked at him as best I could. I was pretty sure both my eyes would be swollen shut by tomorrow, but I didn’t have enough time to focus on that before Levi’s knee slammed beneath my jaw, making my teeth clank together in a painful way.

            “I’ve seen enough,” Reece said, tossing my mom to the side like she was nothing more than a doll. “You might be wondering why I’m letting you join Levi’s gang. Well, I’ll tell you why, snotty brat. You see, Levi was willing to let you stay here in Trost, which meant he accepted that a good number of his men would die, because he knew I wouldn’t stop attacking him. Do you know what that means? That means you’re already a weakness of his, and with time, that weakness will grow. That’s why I’m doing this.”

            I scrambled onto my hands and knees, ignoring the blood pouring from my face. “Fuck you.”

            He laughed. “I like you. You’ve got spunk. It’ll be a great pleasure to kill you in the future.” He walked passed me toward the back gate door, calling out, “Oh, and if you even think about returning to Trost after today, your mom will be dead the second you step foot out of the underground. You have until tonight to be there.”

            When he was gone, I crawled over to where my mom still lay. She wrapped her arms around me, pulling me toward her.

            “We’ll leave,” she said. “We’ll go far away from here.”

            “Mom. I can’t just leave.”

            She leaned back, looking me in the face. “Why? Because of him?” Her eyes flicked over to Levi, who was still standing in the same position he had been after he last kicked me.

            “Yeah,” I said. “And for Isabel and Farlan—for everyone like them. I can’t run away from this. And if Reece sees me leaving with you, he’ll intervene. Mom”—I put my hand over hers—“I’ll be all right.”

            She shook her head. “No, Eren. You won’t be. Look at you.” She cupped my bloody cheek, tears spilling over and running down her face. “Your father’s death had a big impact on you. I knew that the moment you started coming home with cuts and bruises. You wouldn’t let anything hold you back from helping someone in need. It’s like that now, isn’t it? No matter what I say, you’ll go anyway.”

            I dropped my eyes. “Yes.”

            “Just as I thought.” She stood up. “Even if I were to call the police, that man, Reece, would come back. So”—she peered at Levi—“take care of my son.”

            Levi came out of his paralysis at that. “I didn’t want this for him.”

            She sighed. “None of us did. Even Farlan, who came to this morning, said he didn’t want this for Eren. But what else can I do? Under these circumstances, there’s nothing left but to hope that one day he’ll come back to me.”

            “I promise I’ll come back,” I said, even when I didn’t know if I was going to be able to keep that promise.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you guys so much for the comments, the kudos, and the subscriptions. I love all of you! ❤
> 
> Oh, and btw, if you didn't figure out what Levi was doing at the beginning of the chapter, he was brushing Eren's hair out of his face, because he's adorable af. 
> 
> If you want to talk to me, or have any questions about any of my fics, you can reach me here:
> 
> Instagram: @levi.eren_  
> Tumblr: warriorflesh


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as I was writing this chapter, I've come to learn that this Eren and Levi are a lot different than the one's I wrote about in Our Cryptic Love. Levi is very…bad at romance, or confessing feelings, and it made me laugh, but at the same time, it made me frustrated. Come on now, Levi. Say how you feel already! GAH!
> 
> But, it's 2 in the morning here, so before I get carried away, go on and read. :)

Saying good-bye to my mom wasn’t an option for me. To put it into words would make it feel far too real, so instead I pecked her on the cheek and told her that I’d see her again soon. Even though I didn’t know if that would ever be possible, I would do everything within my power to make those words the truth.

            When we finally reached the underground, it was five in the afternoon. Levi helped me up the stairs to his house, his arm wrapped around my waist while mine was slung around his neck. If I weren’t so tired, the contact between the two of us would have made my heartbeat escalate, but I _was_ tired, and my face was throbbing in pain.

            Isabel opened the front door for us when we reached it, moving aside so we could walk in. I let Levi lead me toward his room, letting myself fall back onto the bed the second I sat down on it.

            My eyelids were heavy, too hard to open, so I kept them shut as I felt Levi carefully unbutton my shirt. His slim fingers pushed open the fabric, and even though my face and body ached, I found myself blushing in response to him gazing down at me.

            I swallowed hard, throwing my arm over my face in an attempt to hide my pink cheeks from him. After everything that had happened, you would think that I would be able to control myself, but I couldn’t help the way I reacted to having him around me—even at a time like this, when everything around me was falling apart.

            “I’ll be back,” Levi said, and I listened to him leave the room. When I was sure I was alone, I let out an aggravated sigh of relief. Now was not the time to be thinking about my feelings towards him. That should be left for another day. Right now I had to focus on how I would never be able to return to Trost, to my home. That meant I would have to figure out how to live in the underground from here on out.

            The sound of footsteps interrupted my thoughts, and I moved my hand to peer up at Levi, who was holding a washcloth in his hand. After he sat down next to me, he began to clean off my face. The warm water stung my cuts, but I didn’t put much attention to that. At least I wasn’t until he scraped roughly against one on my jaw.

            I winced, but gritted my teeth against any noises that were threatening to spill out.

            “Does it hurt a lot?” Levi asked, noticing my discomfort.

            I breathed out, turning my gaze up to the ceiling. “No. It’s bearable.”

            “I have a feeling that you’d say that even with a life-threatening wound.”

            “Quite possibly,” I muttered through clenched teeth as he continued to rub my jaw. “I can handle pain.”

            “Is that so?” He suddenly gripped the arm that had been stabbed when I saved Isabel, twisting it to and fro. “I won’t say that I don’t believe you. You kept getting up after every hit. You’re a fighter until the very end, which is a good thing now that you’re stuck here in the underground.” He _tsk_ ed. “This arm will be useless for a while.”

            “I figured as much.”

            He stood up. “You should get some rest. Without Farlan here, there are a lot of things I need to do. While I’m gone, don’t leave the house.”

            “Okay,” I mumbled under my breath, exhausted to the point that speaking was becoming a hard thing to do. But there was one more thing I needed to say. “Levi?” He looked down at me, waiting for me to say whatever it was that I had to say. “Thank you.”

            His brows furrowed. “For what? For beating you up? For getting you stuck in this mess?”

            “What happened to me isn’t your fault.”

            “It is,” he said. “If I would have been there to save Isabel, you wouldn’t have caught the attention of Reece. You would be home right now, which is where you should be. You don’t belong in the underground.”

            I propped myself up onto my elbows. “It doesn’t matter how this situation came to be. It is how it is. I thanked you for bringing me into your home. You didn’t have to do that. Not on the first day that we met, and not now.” I lay back down, unable to keep myself up. “You’ve taken full responsibility for me since the day I saved Isabel. You can sit here and say that it’s because you owed me one, but you didn’t. There was no obligation for me to help Isabel out. I did that on my own. If you wanted to, you could’ve left me alone with the consequences of my actions.”

            He stared at me like I was something he couldn’t understand. “Just go to bed, Eren.” Then he was gone, leaving me alone with questions that I couldn’t even begin to answer.

            It wasn’t long before I fell asleep, my body finally giving into my exhaustion. When I woke up hours later, the room was bathed in darkness. The first thing I noticed as my eyes adjusted was how my body felt as heavy as lead. Then, as I tried to turn onto my side, my attention was immediately drawn to the sleeping form beside me. Had I been asleep that long?

            Even though it was dark, I could still make out Levi’s bare shoulders. An urge to touch him overcame me, but I quickly turned away before I could do anything stupid. Tonight was my first night away from home, but that fact hadn’t hit me yet. I knew as more days passed, I’d become more aware of the situation I was in. But in this very moment, all I could think about was how the bed was too small.

            I inched closer to the edge, dragging the blanket with me. That’s when I heard Levi sigh.

            “Is this going to be a nightly occurrence?” he asked, startling me.    

            I stopped moving, cursing under my breath. “Sorry. I didn’t know you were awake.”

            “So if I were sleeping it would be okay to uncover me?”

            I rolled over, throwing the blanket back onto him. “I didn’t mean to.”

            “Hey.” He caught me by the wrist before I could roll back over. “Why are you always so nervous when you’re alone with me?”

            I almost wanted to laugh, but refrained myself. Had he not been listening to a word I said earlier? Or was he one of those people that needed to have it spelt out for him? But I couldn’t do that just yet. I had to come to terms with how I felt before I went and told him anything, but that didn’t mean I had to lie to him, either.

            “I feel like I’m choking on air when I’m around you.” That was a stupid way to put it. “Uh, well, what I mean is I can’t really think straight, and my heart won’t stop pounding like it’s ready to burst out of my chest. I can’t understand it, but—”

            “Shh.” He pressed his index finger to my lips, his eyes focusing on mine. “Go back to sleep.”

            I chewed on my bottom lip—a habit I had when I was nervous. “I don’t think I can. This bed is really small, and you’re too close…”

            “Do you think before you say anything?”

            “Huh? Um, I’m just telling you the truth.”

            He rolled onto his back, rubbing his temples between thumb and forefinger. “God, of all the kids that could’ve waltz into the underground, it had to be you.”

            “What? What do you mean by that?”

            He shook his head, exasperated. “Just go to bed, Eren. At least try to, anyway.”

            I grumbled something that more or less resembled the word “okay”, but couldn’t even think about sleeping. What had he meant by that? Was I bothering him with my pathetic attempts at a confession? Or could it be that he wasn’t even gay? Maybe Isabel had just been pulling my leg that day since she thought I was attracted to him.

            Shit.

            “I’m sorry,” I said.

            “For what now?”

            “I… Just forget about everything I said a moment ago, okay? I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. I really shouldn’t be saying any of that stuff, anyway. I don’t even know if you’re, you know, gay. I mean, I don’t even know if I’m gay—”

            “Eren,” Levi said, cutting me off. “Shut up.”

            “Okay.”

            The awkwardness I had created seemed to wrap around me. Why had I even said anything at all? I should have just let things be, but no, I had to open my big mouth. Now what would he think of me?

            As I lay there thinking about how I had screwed up, I felt Levi brush a strand of hair behind my ear. But before I could open my eyes, or even utter a word, he said, “Stay just like that. If you move, I won’t tell you what I have to say.” He waited for a while to see if I’d listen. When I didn’t move, or open my eyes, he whispered, “I don’t want to forget what you said.”

            My eyes popped open, but he was already climbing out of bed, disappearing into the darkness as he walked to the door, slipping out of the room. I stared after him for what felt like a small eternity, a smile spreading across my face. There was no denying it now. I liked him. I liked him a lot. As for where that would lead me, I had no idea.

            The rest of the night crept by at a slow pace, and when I finally couldn’t take lying around anymore, I got out of bed. My body didn’t feel like my own, my limbs heavy and hard to move, but when I walked into the kitchen and saw Levi, that didn’t even matter.

            When he noticed me, he looked up from what he was doing. “It’s early.”

            “I know,” I said, going to sit in the chair opposite him. He had a notepad in front of him that was covered in doodles. “You draw?”

            “Not very well.”

            I grabbed the notepad, bringing it over in front of me. There were about ten sketches of a pair of eyes. There were some that you could tell he didn’t take his time on, and then there were the few that were so life-like, that I couldn’t help but notice that the eyes looked very similar to my own.

            “They’re good,” I said, sliding the notepad back over to him.

            “That’s all you have to say?”

            I didn’t want to make assumptions about whose eyes he was drawing, so I nodded. “What else is there to say?”

            He pushed back in his seat, standing up. “I’m going to make myself some tea. Do you want some?”

            “Sure.”

            I watched him fill the kettle with water, feeling like I missed something. I wasn’t good at picking up cues, or hints. In fact, I was bad at anything even remotely close to romance. Was Levi into that sort of stuff? Did he want me to point out that the sketches looked like my eyes?

            Why was this so confusing?

            “Do I hear the kettle going?” Isabel shouted, all but sprinting out of her room. “I do! You better be boiling enough water for me to have a cup of tea.” She sat down next to me, eyeing my face. “Man, you look horrible. Big Bro did quite a number on your face.”

            I shrugged. “It’ll heal.”

            “Hopefully soon. Your eyelids are swollen. I can barely see your eyes.”

            When she had mentioned my eyes, I unconsciously looked over at the notepad that was still sitting on the table. That’s all it took for Isabel to snatch it up, skimming through the sketches. She slammed the notepad down, her eyes wide and her cheeks stretching as she smiled from ear to ear.

            “These are _your_ eyes,” she squealed.

            “W-Well, you can’t be sure…”

            She smacked me hard on the shoulder, making me wince. “I’m sure.” Her stomach grumbled and she patted it. “I’m hungry, but that can wait, because these are definitely your eyes. Man, I wish Farlan was here to back me up.” She turned in her seat to face Levi. “When can we go see him?”

            I was glad she had dropped the subject about the sketches. I wasn’t good at this whole having a crush on someone. It made me feel exposed in a way that made my stomach clench. Why did I have to get a crush on Levi of all people? He was a thug, not someone who was looking for a relationship with some kid.

            But wasn’t I a thug now, too?

            “Soon,” Levi said.

            She sighed. “I hate how we’re here and he’s there.” She jabbed her index finger against my chest. “Don’t think I forgot about _this_.” She tapped the notepad. “Big Bro, did you draw Eren’s eyes?”

            I shot her a glare, expecting Levi to deny everything, or make something up. So when he said, “Yes,” I inhaled so deep, I started coughing.

            Isabel clapped me on the back. “Told you. Your eyes are gorgeous. Seriously, they are green and blue and just…goddamn. I would draw them, but I have no drawing skills whatsoever.”

            “They’re not that great,” I said.

            She rolled her eyes. “Oh, shut up. They are. But onto more important matters: I’m starving. Big Bro, can I make fruit salad with the fruit Eren brought over the other day?”

            Levi set three mugs down on the counter. “Go ahead.”

            She squealed, jumping out of her seat to run to the refrigerator. She hummed while she set out a variety of fruit. I kept my attention on her, unable to look over at Levi, who was pouring the hot water into the mugs. This was not how I was expecting my first day in the underground to go. Thinking of him made me feel frustrated, because I should’ve been thinking about my mom. What was she doing right now? Was she okay?

            By now she should’ve been at work, but with everything that happened yesterday, I doubt she would go in. I would like to think that she did, though, and wasn’t sitting at home thinking about me, but I knew the chances of that were slim to none.

            “Here.” Levi set a mug of tea in front of me. I wrapped my hands around it, letting the heat seep into my cold palms.

            “Thanks.”

            He sat down opposite me. “We don’t have sugar. Do you take it in your tea?”

            “I hardly drink tea, but when I do, I don’t take sugar.” I brought the cup up to my lips, taking a sip. “It’s good this way.”

            “Boo,” Isabel hollered while she chopped up strawberries. “I love sugar in my tea! Two spoonfuls, to be exact, and milk, too. Big Bro thinks I’m wasting the tea that way, but it tastes good!”

            “You get rid of all the natural flavor by adding so much sugar,” Levi said.

            “What natural flavor? It tastes like hot water without sugar.”

            He looked offended at that. Was he that much of a tea fanatic? “Just finish making the fruit salads.”

            Isabel smirked at him. “Roger that.”

            Ten minutes later, we were all eating. My face hurt every time I chewed, but I finished everything that was on my plate. With how things were in the underground, wasting food was a selfish thing to do. It just made me think about how I took advantage of everything I had in Trost.

            After I helped Isabel clean up, I waited for Levi to instruct me on what to do. Obviously I couldn’t just sit around and I didn’t want to. Even with my injuries, I could do tasks around the house. If he wanted me to clean, I’d clean.

            “Come with me,” Levi said, walking out the back door that led to the washroom. I followed after him, not even questioning why he was taking me out here. It wasn’t until he shut the door behind us that I began to get nervous. Why were we in the washroom together? “Take off your shirt.”

            “What? Why?”

            “Let me look at your arm.”

            A part of me wanted to refuse him, but if it were any other person, I wouldn’t hesitate to do it. So I pushed aside my sudden embarrassment and pulled off my shirt, looking at anything but him. I bit down on my bottom lip nervously when he grabbed my arm, unraveling the gauze I had wrapped around my wound.

            “How does this feel?” He pressed his index finger around the gash.

            “I can’t really feel that.”

            “That’s a bad sign,” he said. “You probably have nerve damage.”

            “Is it healing?”

            “Yes, but you may never regain feeling in that part of your arm.”

            I shrugged. “Oh well. That doesn’t bother me. As long as it’s healing, and I’ll be able to use it like before, then I’m okay with everything else.”

            His eyes darted up to scrutinize my expression. “These last couple of days you’ve been getting beat up. Your face is a mess, and your arm is pretty much useless, at the moment. Yet you don’t seem to care too much. Why is that?”

            “Getting beat up isn’t really a big deal for me, and why should I care if my face is a mess?”

            “A lot of people care about their appearance, kid.”

            “Oh,” I said. “Is that what you were talking about? I’ve never cared about the way I look. I don’t see a point in it. I look how I look.”

            He grabbed me by the chin, turning my head from side to side. “Well, I can see why someone like you wouldn’t care.”

            “Huh?”

            “Are you that dense?” He dropped my chin. “You’re a good looking guy. Someone like you doesn’t have to try at all to look good, because for you, it’s a natural thing.”

            My mouth dropped open before I could stop it. Did he just say I was good looking? No, I couldn’t overreact to such a simple statement. It’s not like he meant anything by it. He was probably just trying to tell me that I should take better care of myself, or at least that I should care about my face being in ruins. Right?

            “What’s wrong?” Levi asked, pressing the tip of his finger between my eyebrows.

            “Uh, nothing. It’s nothing.”

            “Doesn’t look that way to me. Spit it out, Eren.”    

            I stared at him, wishing that feeling something for him wasn’t so damn complicated. “I’m confused.”

            “About? Be specific.”

            “About this.” I moved my hand between him and me. “I’ve…never liked anyone before, but I think—I mean, I…”

            “Out with it already,” he demanded.

            “I like you! There. I said it. I like you, Levi.”

            I waited for him to respond, or at least do something beyond just staring at me. But he didn’t. He stood there with no expression on his face, his eyes looking into mine, making me anxious. I wanted to reach out and shake him, make him say something, but I couldn’t move.

            “You should shower,” he said at last, pointing to my arm. “Be careful when you wash that. Make sure you rinse off all the soap. There is gauze in the cabinet over there. When you’re done, come back into the house. I’ll give you something to do.”

            He walked passed me, and I couldn’t even begin to grasp what had just happened. I had told him how I felt; yet he gave me no type of response. I knew I was a fool for having feelings for him. Of course he didn’t return them. He was the strongest thug in the underground. He probably never let his emotions get in his way, because becoming attached to someone was a weakness—just like Reece had said.

            I undressed, chucking my pants against the wall. From now on, I would focus on everything but Levi. Having feelings for him would only get in my way.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you see these two dorks? They're so adorable, yet so naive. Eren is super confused, and can't even grasp onto the tiny hints Levi is leaving for him. And Levi, on the other hand, can't even form words when it comes to confessing any types of feelings or emotions he may be experiencing. 
> 
> Babies, please! 
> 
> Next chapter will be a serious one, but I hope you caught onto the fact that these two dweebs are slowly but surely getting closer. Let's squeal together now! (≧◡≦)
> 
> As always, thank you for the comments, the kudos, and the subscriptions! You guys are fabulous!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter, you have no idea. I mean, there are parts that make me sad, but the ending… UGH! My heart can't endure this!
> 
> Anyhoo, go on and read, my babies! :)

After a week in the underground, I was forced to realize that what Farlan had told me wasn’t a lie. Food was scarce in this part of the city, and people were stingy with what they had. It was either thievery, or starving. I tried to make due with what little we had for as long as I could, but before long, I couldn’t take it anymore—the hunger pains were too much to bear.

            Tonight Levi and I were going on a raid through Reece’s territory. I didn’t want to think about stealing food from someone, but what other choice did we have left?

            As we got ready, Levi took one look at my outfit and shook his head. “You need to wear dark clothing. You’ll stick out wearing this.” He flicked the collar of my white T-shirt.

            “I’ll change,” I said, walking over to the closet. I slipped off my shirt, scanning through the clothes I had brought with me. There weren’t a lot to choose from, but I settled on a navy-blue button-down, pulling it off the hanger it hung on. “Will this do?”

            Levi glanced at it. “Yes.” He watched me as I tried to coax my bad arm into the sleeve. “Do you need help?”

            “What? No. I’m good.” Though after a few minutes of trying, I was beginning to think that I wasn’t so good after all. Earlier, Isabel had helped me with my shirt, but I refused to let Levi dress me. I could do it on my own. I just had to get my hand through the sleeve and then the rest would be easy.

            As I tried to do this, he came over and yanked the shirt out of my grasp. “Lean forward.”

            “I can do it—”

            “Will you just lean forward already? We don’t have all night.”

            I sighed, knowing there was no point in arguing, so I did as he told me, refusing to look at him as he slid the shirt over my head. When he grabbed my wrist, I turned my head to the side to gaze at the door while he pushed my arm through the sleeve. I tried not to put attention to his fingertips grazing along my side, but didn’t pull it off when I visibly shuddered under his touch.

            He stopped, his eyes flicking up to look at my face. “You’re going to have to be on high alert tonight.”

            Was that seriously all he was going to say? He’d been avoiding the subject of my confession since the day I let it slip out. It was like he didn’t want to acknowledge my feelings at all, which would’ve been fine with me if I weren’t sleeping in the same bed as him every single night. Avoiding him was hard when you lived with the man.

            “I know,” I said, moving away from him.

            “We can’t afford any mishaps, so don’t do anything reckless, and stick to my side at all times, unless I say otherwise.”

            I turned my back to him. “I know.”

            “Good. We’ll leave once Isabel is asleep. We don’t need her to try to tag along. _You_ shouldn’t even be going with me, but unfortunately I’m short on men with Farlan gone.”

            I whirled around, stepping up to him. “Don’t treat me like a child. I won’t mess up, and I’ll do as you say. Don’t act like I’m just going to be in the way. I’m capable of going on a food raid with you.”

            “We’ll see,” he said, walking around me. “You tend to act before you thoroughly think about the situation.”

            “I’ll prove to you that I can do this.”

            “That’s what I’m hoping for.”

            As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he left the room. I stared at the door, wondering why he had left so suddenly. It felt like whenever I was on the brink of understanding how he felt about me, he would walk away. Why? Why was he so determined to keep me shut out? And what could I do to make him open up to me?

            After I had confessed my feelings to him, I wanted to forget all about it. I didn’t want to think about how he made me feel when he was around, or how everything he did interested me. But that was a lot easier said than done. Especially when we slept in the same bed, and I was forced to look at his achingly toned body.

            I sighed, the image of his back muscles coming to the forefront of my mind. I had such a desire to run my hands along the smooth planes of his skin. How would it feel to touch him? To have him touch me in return?

            These were the thoughts that plagued me day in and day out.

            I shook my head, focusing on what we were going to be doing tonight. I couldn’t be thinking about these things when we were hours away from going into Reece’s territory. A lot could happen, and Levi trusted me to come along. I couldn’t fuck up. No matter what, I had to make it through tonight and prove that I could do these things with him.      

            Once I put on my shoes, I walked out into the kitchen, going to sit in an empty chair next to Isabel, who looked like she was fighting sleep with all the strength she could muster. She knew what we would be doing tonight. She also knew that Levi would never allow her to come.

            “We’re the same age,” she mumbled. “I should be able to go too.”

            “I don’t make the decisions.”

            “But you agree with him, don’t you? You think I should stay behind.”

            “Yes, I do.”

            She pinched my shoulder. “Why? You think I’m not strong enough? I am!”

            “It’s not that,” I said. “I think you would be too much of a distraction for Levi. He cares about you very much. He would keep a close eye on you, and if you were to get into any type of trouble, he would drop everything to come help you. That could put his men in danger. That could put _him_ in danger.”

            She dropped her head on the table. “It’s not fair. He would drop everything to help you out, yet you’re still going.”

            I put my hand on the top of her head. “I don’t think he would.”

            “Open your eyes already,” she said. “It’s so obvious that he likes you. I swear whenever you’re not looking, he’s staring at you like you’re some precious flower. I’ve never seen him look at anyone that way.”

            My stomach flip-flopped inside me like a fish out of water, and I could feel heat rushing to my face. “A precious flower?”

            “Yes. I get why. You’re everything he’s ever come to like and be proud of. You don’t give up, you’re strong, you’re brave, and you’re fucking gorgeous. Have you seen yourself in the mirror?”

            I laughed. “Yeah. I look pretty shitty right now.”

            She lifted her head up to look at me. “No. Even with bruises, you’re still a total hottie. I’d bang you.”

            “You wouldn’t,” I said. “I probably suck at it. I’m a virgin.”

            “I know.” She shrugged. “So am I, but you don’t have to worry about that, because if you and Levi hook up, he’ll be the one topping.” At that, my whole body began to burn just below the surface of my skin. “Oh, you’re blushing! Does that mean you like the idea? You do, don’t you?”

            “Keep your voice down.”

            “Why? Afraid Big Bro will hear that you like the idea of him topping?”

            I covered her mouth with both my hands. “Shut up.”

            She turned her head to the side, giggling. “For a big tough guy, you sure are acting like a blushing virgin right now. Oh wait. It’s because you are!”

            “What’s going on?” Levi said, walking into the kitchen, startling me.

            I shook my head, my eyes going wide. “N-Nothing!”

            Isabel’s giggling turned into full-blown laughter. “Eren’s a blushing virgin! You should’ve seen his reaction when I told him that if you and him ever got together, you’d be topping.”

            Mortified, all I could do was cover my face with my hands. I didn’t want to see his expression. God, what would he think? It’s not like I had been the one to bring it up. Not that I hadn’t thought about it before, because I had, but that didn’t mean that I ever wanted him to know about it.

            “Eren,” Levi said.

            “Yes?” I peeked at him through the cracks in my fingers as I spread them apart.

            “There’s a lot to be done, and since Isabel won’t go to sleep, I’ve instructed a few of my men to stay watch outside of the house. We should get a move on.”

            “Of course.” I stood up, hoping that the color in my cheeks had faded away. This I could deal with. I was good at getting things done, so that’s what I would focus on tonight. If we could get a sufficient amount of food on this raid, then I’m sure Levi would see me as being capable on going out on these types of missions with him.

            “This is so not fair, Big Bro,” Isabel whined, puffing her cheeks out in a pout.

            “Be a good girl,” Levi told her, “and I’ll bring you home a treat.”

            She mumbled something under her breath, looking like a sulking child, but didn’t say anything else on the matter. When Levi took in her silence, he signaled for me to follow him out of the house. I kept my eyes pinned ahead of me as I walked out the front door, feeling the cold air rush against my face, ruffling my hair.

            “Keep by my side at all times,” Levi said. “If you disobey one of my orders, this will be the first and last time you come with me on a food raid. Do you understand that?”

            “Yes.”

            “Good. Let’s go.”

            We walked down the stairs and several men followed after us. I stretched my bad arm, wincing when I felt the soreness. I needed to be able to use it. What good would I be if I only had the use of one arm?

            “How does it feel?” Levi asked, glancing at me for a brief moment before he returned his gaze to the path in front of us.

            “Stiff. I should be exercising it every day.”

            “You need to let it heal before you strain it.”

            That’s what he’d been telling me for the past week. “So I’ve heard.”

            “Don’t worry about using it tonight. We won’t be doing a lot of scaling, and if we run into anyone, I’ll take care of them. What I need from you is to grab what I tell you to. Here.” He slid a duffel bag off his shoulder, holding it out to me. “Grab anything of use.”

            “Got it.”

            From that point on, he no longer spoke to me, just used signals to tell me where to go. When we reached the point that would take us out of his territory into Reece’s, he picked up his pace, throwing the hoodie of his black jacket over his head. I moved next to him, trying to make as little sound as possible.

            The buildings on either side of us had no signs of life, but we still listened for any sound that would disrupt the silence surrounding us. We didn’t come across anyone as we made our way through dark alleys, which seemed strange to me. Wouldn’t Reece be keeping a close watch on us?

            As we came up on a rundown part of Reece’s territory, Levi’s hand suddenly shot out, pushing me back against the building. He pointed in front of us, and I saw three men huddled together. So this is where they were. What were they protecting? Food? Supplies? We needed both.

            Levi moved in close to whisper, “Stay here. I’m going to take them out quietly.”

            I hated leaving it all up to him, but I knew that he could do it better alone, so I nodded, watching him move forward. The three men weren’t facing in this direction, focusing their attention on the small ground fire in front of them. They didn’t even sense Levi advancing on them, not until he knocked one of them out with ease. Even after they were alerted to his presence, the other two stood no chance against him.

            “God,” I breathed. “He’s so quick.”

            When all three men were lying on the ground unconscious, Levi curled his finger, beckoning me toward him. I went to stand next to him.

            “Check their pockets,” he directed me.

            “On it.” I knelt down, digging through their pockets as fast as I could. They didn’t have much, but one had a pretty nice pocketknife. I put it in the bag, standing back up. “What now?”

            He jerked his chin to the right. “There will be more men stationed up ahead. More of my men are on the rooftops, and will assist if I need them, but I want to get through with this as quickly as possible. I don’t want to cause a scene, because that will bring attention to us that will notify Reece that we’re here.”

            “So, you want to handle them yourself? Is that what you’re saying?”

            “Yes. The less of my men becoming involved, the better.”

            I didn’t argue, just trailed after him as he began to walk toward another alleyway. How many men were up ahead? Could he take all of them on his own? I knew his men would come to his aid if need be, but would it be before or after he was hurt. The thought of him enduring any type of injury made me cringe.

            “Do you see them?” Levi whispered, pointing directly in front of us.

            My eyes came to land on several men. There were at least fifteen of them, and by the looks of it, they were all heavily armed. “There are too much of them.”

            His eyes moved up to my face. “I can deal with them. Stay hidden. If they see you, they won’t hesitate to come after you, as well.”

            “Wait,” I said, my hand darting out to snatch onto the sleeve of his jacket. “Be careful.”

            “I always am, kid.” He shook my hand off, not waiting to go into the heat of danger. I stuck to the shadows, my eyes never leaving him. If he got out of this unscathed, it would be a miracle.

            He moved fast, taking out several of them before the others took notice of him. But once they did, they surrounded him in a circle. My breath caught painfully in my throat as my eyes stayed glued to the top of Levi’s head, which was all I could make out as the men encircled him.

            “Shit,” I hissed, breathing out in relief when I saw Levi take more men out, but that’s when one of them lifted up their hand, and I saw the glint of the knife before he brought it down on Levi’s shoulder. “NO!”

            There was no time to think, I just reacted, darting out amongst the men. They glanced in my direction for a few seconds, some detaching themselves from around Levi to come deal with me. I dug into the duffel bag, taking out the pocketknife I had taken from one of the fallen men earlier.

            “Gonna actually use that?” one of them goaded me, smirking.

            “Come closer and find out, you fuck.”

            “Goddamnit, Eren,” I heard Levi say, but I couldn’t see him. “Told you to stay hidden.”

            “How cute,” the same man from earlier muttered. “Levi has a crush.”

            “Fuck you!” I snarled before I brought my fist down on his cheek, knocking him sideways.

            Once the rest of the men saw that I meant business, they immediately jumped on me, but I managed to kick one in the balls. He toppled over, and I swung the pocketknife to the side, slashing through one of the men’s arm. I shoved him out of the way, kicking him hard in the side so he’d stay down. Then I made my way toward Levi.

            Even with his injury, he had knocked more men out. His eyes took me in as mine locked onto his wound. The blade was still lodged in his shoulder, and whenever he moved, the men would latch onto the handle, digging it deeper into his skin. He never cried out, never winced in pain, just gritted his teeth as he kept fighting.

            “Hey,” I said to the man who had his hand on the handle of the blade. He was tall and thin, with long brown hair. “Does this feel good?” I slammed the pocketknife I held into his shoulder, hearing him scream in response. He stumbled back, but I never let go of the knife, applying pressure so he could feel the same pain he had caused Levi.

            I moved my foot behind him and he tripped over it.

            “Shit,” he whimpered as he landed on his ass. “Fuck. I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

            “You'd better be.” I put my foot on his chest. “Touch him again and I’ll kill you.”

            “I won’t touch him again! I won’t lay a finger on him! Just pull the knife out!” He raised his hands up to show me he was defenseless, but I knew his kind. The second I turned my back, he would be up and coming at me.

            “All right,” I said, pulling the blade out, watching his blood run down his arm. Then I swung around, kicking him in the head in the process. When I heard him hit the ground, I went back over to Levi. “How many are left?”

            He stared at me, and then at the man I had just knocked out cold. “The rest fled, probably going to go tell Reece. We need to move.” He brought his hand up, making signals with his fingers that I couldn’t understand. But I looked up to the rooftops, spotting men running along them.

            “What was that?” I asked.

            “They’ll have to move in and get the food. I can’t defend you properly with this injury. Come on. Let’s head back before Reece comes with more men.”

            We ran through the darkness, keeping alert. When we reached his territory again, we didn’t stop. I could see him grasping onto his shoulder, but his face was still free of any emotion. I knew he must’ve been in pain, but he was good at hiding it.

            “Is it always like this?” I said as we finally reached his house.

            “No. It’s only recently that we’ve run this low on food. Never would I trespass onto Reece’s territory if that weren’t the case. Many of my men will lose their lives tonight.”

            I pushed open the front door. “Enough to leave you defenseless?”

            “No, but enough that I’ll have to let other men join me—men that aren’t ready.”

            The house was dark and I walked through the living room until I was in the kitchen. I grabbed the matchbox that was on the table, lighting one to turn on the lantern. Using electricity was a privilege in the underground. Levi didn’t have enough money to use it whenever he pleased.

            “How’s your shoulder?” I asked, pulling out a chair for him.

            He collapsed onto it. “It’s fine. Help me patch it up.”

            I went into his room to grab the wooden box that held all the medical supplies we had, which wasn’t much. Then I walked back out to where Levi sat, helping him out of his shirt. There wasn’t a lot of light, but I could still tell that the wound was a bad one. I clenched my fists before I cleaned up the gash.

            “Use that,” he said, pointing to a big square piece of gauze. I picked it up, pressing it down gently on his shoulder as I taped it in place.

            “Are you okay?”

            He sighed. “I’m fine, kid. You shouldn’t have come out of hiding.”

            “I wasn’t just going to watch you get hurt. I had to do something.”

            “You disobeyed my order.”

            “I would disobey your order a millions times over if it meant saving your life,” I said.

            I don’t know what possessed me in that moment, but I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. He was unresponsive, but I didn’t care, bringing my hand up to thread my fingers in his hair. He still didn’t move, but he also wasn’t pushing me away, and I was too angry to stop.

            “You aggravating asshole,” I muttered against his lips. “You confusing, _irritating_ bastard, making me sleep in the same bed as you when it’s hard to breathe just standing next to you. You—” He cut me off as he kissed me hard, taking over my mouth with harsh movements, but I drank them in, needing more. I groaned as shivers ran down my spine, immediately met with his tongue lapping against mine.

            My knees felt weak; my heart was hammering an uneven beat in my chest. My entire body felt ablaze with desire, and I wanted him more than I could understand.

            Levi leaned back, staring up at me. “We can’t do this.”

            “We can’t do a lot of things, but that never stopped us before.”

            “You’ve been a thorn in my side since the day I met you.”

            “Yeah, but I think you like that,” I said.

            He leaned toward me angrily, and I could see the intent in his eyes. He meant to frighten and disillusion me…

            …but kissed my mouth like raindrops falling on cool water.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *squeals* That ending, am I right? I love it. I swear I was fangirling as I wrote it, but yes! This is the beginning of their…complex, sort of relationship. 
> 
> Buuut, thank you guys so much for reading and commenting! I'm sorry I haven't been commenting back. I've been super busy since they switched my hours at my work, so you know. But I do read them, and I love all of you who take the time to tell me your thoughts. ❤


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a miracle that I finished this chapter by tonight. I haven't been sleeping well, so I've been struggling with the simple act of thinking straight. But, here we are, with this chapter complete. I like this chapter, as well, though Levi is a stubborn man. *sigh*
> 
> Anyway, go on and read, my lovelies. :)

Days blended in with one another, and I couldn’t focus on anything for more than a couple minutes at a time. My mind was a constant foggy mess that could only conjure up images of Levi lying next to me in bed. He hadn’t kissed me since the night of the raid, and my hormones were beginning to take over my life. Being a horny teenager was not my forte. I hated it more than I could ever describe.

            Today Isabel and I sat together in the living room, flipping through some pages in one of Farlan’s books. I couldn’t concentrate on the tiny text laid out before me, so I simply nodded in response to any of her questions. She seemed pleased with that for a while, but when she gazed up at me to ask another question, her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

            “What is wrong with you?” she asked, shutting the book. “You’ve been acting weird. Are you sweating?”

            I rubbed the back of my neck, chuckling nervously. I didn’t want to discuss why I was in this state. Knowing her, she would holler out the news the second it was out of my mouth. “It’s nothing.”

            “Liar. You look wrecked.”

            I ran my fingers through my hair, unable to keep still. My body felt jittery. “I didn’t get a lot of sleep.” That wasn’t a lie. Sleeping next to Levi was nearly impossible. There were many a nights that I just stared at his back, hoping he’d turn around and kiss me senseless. But that hadn’t happened…ever.

            “I can tell,” she said, running the pad of her index finger under my right eye. “Why? What’s on your mind?”

            The thought of opening up to her was appealing, because I felt like I needed to tell someone, and it’s not like I had a lot of options on who I could tell. If it were up to me, I would confide in Armin, but he was in Trost, and I was here. “Uh,” I began, dropping my eyes. “I...kissed Levi.”

            Her eyes widened to the point where she looked comical. “ _What?!_ When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

            “Shh,” I hissed, my eyes darting over to Levi’s bedroom door. “I really don’t want him to hear us.”

            “Fine. I’ll keep it down. Just tell me how and when this happened.”

            I sighed, pulling my legs up to my chest to bury my face in between my knees. “It happened on the night of the food raid. I was... I don’t know. Angry that he got hurt, and when I was done patching up his wound, I just kissed him. He didn’t kiss me back at first, but then I called him all sorts of names and…yeah.”

            She squealed. “Oh my god! So that’s why you’ve been so flustered. Have you guys kissed again?”

            “No,” I murmured. “He won’t even mention that we kissed.”

            She reached out, clamping her hands down on my shoulders, giving me a good shake. “Do I have to write it out for you? Make the first move, you dimwit! Levi is… Well, to put it simply, he’s really bad at romance. I mean, really bad. Even if you tell him to kiss you, he’d probably just stare at you like you made a mistake, and weren’t talking to him. Goddamnit! Go to his room right now.”

            “I can’t just barge in there.”

            “Oh yes you can.” She stood up, clasping onto my hand to drag me up with her. “You moron! You’ve been wasting precious time. By now, you guys could’ve been getting your freak on. But no, you both had to be dumbasses. Now”—she turned to face me, fixing my hair and straightening my shirt—“go in there, and be the pretty boy that you are.”

            “Will you hold on?” I demanded, digging my heels into the carpet to keep myself in place as she insistently pushed me toward Levi’s room. “I can’t do this. I don’t even know how to go about it.”

            She scoffed. “Are you serious? You go in there, you climb on his lap, thrusts your hips a little, and you’ll be good to go. I swear he will take over once he’s turned on.”

            “We aren’t even together. I can’t just have”—my throat felt dry as I completed the sentence—“sex with him.”

            “He won’t do that,” she said. “Give Big Bro some credit. He knows you’re a virgin. He’ll probably just suck you off or something. Or maybe just settle for giving you a hand job. That’s not too bad, right?”

            I turned around to face her, holding her at bay. “Can you stop talking so bluntly?”

            “No. It’s what I do, Eren. I tell the truth.”

            For the past few days, I had been aching for Levi to do something, anything. But now that Isabel was trying to get me to initiate the act, I couldn’t help but feel like the virgin that I was. I had zero experience in that field. Even kissing was a completely new thing for me. So how was I supposed to go in there and act like some sex kitten when I didn’t know the first thing about it?

            “Listen,” Isabel said, rubbing my shoulders. “I know you’re nervous. It’s normal. And you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. Be open with him. Tell him to stop if you’re feeling uncomfortable. He will, trust me. Or if you’re not up for anything sexual, just talk to him. Tell him how you feel.”

            I let out a shaky breath. “Why do I have to do this?”

            “Because nothing will get resolved if you leave it up to him. You want a relationship with him, don’t you?”

            I groaned, hating to admit anything. “Yeah.”

            “Then…? Just go. You won’t die.”

            “I might,” I shot back, but let her tug me toward Levi’s bedroom. I had been in there hundreds of times, but always to go to sleep, or change. Never had I gone in there for something like this. Could I just walk in? Should I knock?

            I wasn’t given the chance to do either, because Isabel took hold of the handle and threw the door open, practically shoving me inside. The click behind me confirmed that I was alone with Levi, who was sitting up in his bed with his sketchpad in front of him. He looked up at me, hair falling over those gray eyes that made me melt where I stood.

            “Is something wrong?” he asked.

            I couldn’t form a response, standing there unblinking while he looked at me like I was annoying the shit out of him. This was a bad idea. I didn’t know the first thing about telling him how I felt. I wasn’t good with words, and always had a hard time expressing myself, so this situation was making me beyond nervous.

            “Eren?” Levi said, moving off the bed. “Is something wrong?”

            “S-Stop right there.” I held my hands up, my face growing hot. If he came any closer, I would completely lose my cool. It was a miracle I could still stay upright. Fuck. This was embarrassing. To think that I wanted to be a thug that could stand next to him as an equal. That was laughable. Who would take me seriously right now? Absolutely no one. _I_ didn’t even take myself seriously.

            “Eren, will you tell me what’s going on?”

            I couldn’t tell him the real reason why I was acting this way. I needed to think up some excuse, but my brain wasn’t functioning. The lack of sleep was finally taking its toll on me, and it couldn’t have picked a worse time. Why couldn’t I think of one thing to say?

            “Eren?” Levi said, taking a step closer to me. He was wearing a black, long-sleeve button-down that was undone, exposing his torso. I stared at his creamy skin stretched taut over his muscles and the sharp dips and curves of his abs…

            God, I wanted to lick them. I quite literally wanted to drop down to my knees to run my tongue along…

            _Stop! Stop staring at them. He’ll notice._

I forced my gaze upwards; meeting his gray eyes head on. He had this peculiar look on his face, like he couldn’t decide whether he wanted to throw me out, or knock some sense into me. Either one would do right now—anything to break me out of this incapability of speech. This was so unusual for me. Normally, I had no problem telling people how I felt, but now the thought of being rejected stopped me from telling him all the things that were on my mind.

            “Hey,” he whispered, cupping my cheek. “What’s wrong?”

            The feel of his hand on my skin made me shiver. I avoided making eye contact, knowing that if I didn’t speak up, nothing would get resolved between the two of us—just as Isabel said. It was true that I wanted a relationship with him, but I didn’t know if that was possible with us living in the underground and him being the leader of a gang. Did he even have the time to be with me? Did he even want to?

            “Nothing,” I lied. “I just came in here to ask about Farlan.” Since we had left him at the hospice, we hadn’t heard about him. Levi had sent men to go check up on him, but they couldn’t get into the hospice without getting noticed, which would have put Farlan at risk.

            Levi tilted his head to the side, dropping his hand. “I’m going to see how he is this weekend. Obviously the men I sent aren’t capable of sneaking passed a few security guards.” He turned away from me, crossing his arms over his chest. “Is that really why you came in here?”

            Why did he have to be so hard to read? If I could tell what he was feeling, it would be easier to talk to him about whatever was going on between us. But I couldn’t tell, which made everything a lot harder for me. He always came off as stoic, impassive, but I knew he was just good at hiding his emotions.

            There was no proper way to go about this, so I decided to start this off with the truth. “I came in here to talk about…us. I don’t know what to say, though. I don’t even know how you feel about me, or if you feel anything at all.”

            At that, he turned around, staring at me like he couldn’t understand what I had just said. “You honestly question whether I feel anything toward you or not?”

            I sighed. “Yeah. I’m not good at this sort of thing, okay. I really suck at this.”

            It took him a while to respond, and when he did, his voice was barely above a whisper. “Neither am I.”

            “Do you want there to be something between us?”

            “Do you?”

            This wasn’t going anywhere. I had to be blunt with him, if I was going to get my message across. “Yes. I want to be”—I swallowed hard—“your boyfriend.” I physically cringed at that. That sounded like something some love-obsessed fool would say, but it was the truth. I had never wanted a relationship before him, but there was no doubt in my mind that that’s what I wanted now.

            “I can’t be that for you,” he said.

            Rejection was a horrible thing to experience in front of the person that had caused you to feel physically ill with six simple words. That was it. He had been honest with me, and that was that. I would be a man about this and accept his decision. I wasn’t going to cry over something like this, that wasn’t who I was.

            I stepped around him to look into his eyes. “I understand.” Then I walked toward the door, but I didn’t make it far before he caught my wrist in his hand, yanking me back. “What are you doing?”

            “I said that I couldn’t be your boyfriend, Eren. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want there to be something between us.”

            I gaped at him. “What? Make sense.”

            He let go of my hand, looking aggravated. “Every day there is a possibility that I could die. Being a thug, let alone a leader of a gang, puts you at great risk. I can’t sit here and promise you things that I can’t give, but I’m a selfish man, Eren. The best thing to do would be to keep away from you, but I’ve tried that, and I’m done trying.”

            Wait, I had to get this straight. “If you don’t want a relationship, then what exactly do you want?” I knew what he wanted, but I was going to make him say it.

            “Don’t act like some naïve adolescence.”

            “I _am_ a naïve adolescence. I have no experience in this sort of thing.”

            “That may be true, but you know what I’m talking about.”

            “You want sex,” I snapped. “That’s _all_ you want. I can’t do that.”

            We stared at each other, and I wanted to punch him square in the face, but what good would that do? He had been honest with me. It’s not like he fed me some bullshit just to get in my pants and then turned away from me in the long run. He was actually handling this situation in a mature manner, but it still pissed me off.

            “That settles that,” I said, unable to keep the anger from my voice. “I won’t bother you about this anymore. All I want is for you to teach me the ways of the underground so I can make a name for myself. I want to kill Reece. It’s the only way that I’ll be able to see my mom again, and obviously I need to be street smart to do it.”

            “I’ll teach you anything you’re willing to learn.” The way he had said that made it sound like he wasn’t just talking about thug related things.

            I glared at him. “What do you want me to do? Isabel and I have been sitting around all morning. Give me something to work on.” I desperately wanted to get off the subject of sex and relationships. I wanted him to give me some mindless task that I could put all my energy and attention on.

            “You can clean up the washroom.”

            “I’ll get right on that,” I said, leaving the room before he could notice the way my whole body was shaking. I never thought I would go through something like this. Back when I was in Trost, I felt like letting someone have the capacity to alter your mood was idiotic. Now, here I was, feeling like shit thanks to Levi. Well, because of his brutal honesty, but that was better than pretty lies.

            Eventually, I would get over it. As for now, I would scrub every flat surface in the washroom until my hands were red.

            When Isabel spotted me, she went to stand up, but I didn’t stop to talk, walking out the back door to get to the washroom. Once I was inside, I grabbed all the cleaning supplies from the cupboard and got straight to work. I started off with sweeping the floor, making sure to do it twice to get every last speck of dust before I mopped.

            It took me hours to make the washroom presentable, but I still wasn’t satisfied. If it weren’t for Isabel calling me in for dinner, I would’ve stayed there the whole night, scrubbing away my frustrations.

            After I took a quick shower, I went back inside, greeted by a plate of food being shoved at my chest. Levi looked irritated, eyebrows drawn together, but I just took the plate he offered and went to go sit down. I couldn’t understand the man. He never made any sense. I was done trying to decipher his behavior.

            We all ate in an awkward silence, with me scarfing down my food so I could get out of there as quickly as possible. When I was done, I washed my plate, and then went into Levi’s room, changing into my pajamas. I wanted to be fast asleep before he came in here, and knowing him, that would be the case. He never came to bed while I was still awake, which was fine by me tonight.

            I crawled into bed, lifting the blanket up and slipping underneath. Even when I was exhausted, I couldn’t fall asleep. There were too many thoughts running through my head. I wanted to turn my brain off, or think about something that didn’t have to do with Levi.

            Levi…

            I knew a way to get him off my mind. It would also serve to relieve some of this pent up sexual frustration. I had to do it quick, which shouldn’t be a problem. I couldn’t even remember the last time I had masturbated. Before, it was rare when I succumbed to my sexual desires, but now it was impossible to ignore.

            Sliding my hand down the front of my pajama bottoms, I grabbed the base of my cock, which drew out a shuddering moan from me. I didn’t have any form of lubrication, but this would have to do.

            My breath quickened as I got a good pace going, my mind providing me with several images of Levi. I was really doing this. I was really jacking off to thoughts of him. I didn’t want to be touching myself in his bed; I wanted his hand to replace my own. I wanted to feel his breath against the nape of my neck, feel his hand caressing me…

            “Levi,” I moaned, turning my head to bury my face in the pillow.

            The sound of the door opening had me yanking my hand out of my pants faster than the speed of light. I lay completely still, hoping that it was Isabel. Or, if it was Levi, that he hadn’t heard what I had been doing.

            Fuck! Why of all nights did he have to come to bed early on this one? The _one_ night that I decided to touch myself.

            Whoever it was, they weren’t saying anything, and I refused to look over the blanket to see who it was. It must’ve been Levi. If it were Isabel, she would have already said something to me. What was he thinking right now? Had he heard me moan his name? Shit. I was jerking off in his bed. He would probably kill me.

            I pulled the blanket down passed my chin, watching Levi slip off his shirt. His back was turned to me, so I quickly readjusted myself so that I was turned to the side, facing away from where he would lie. Hopefully he hadn’t heard me, and even if he had, I doubted he would say anything to me about it.

            A few minutes ticked by, and when the bed dipped under his weight, I shut my eyes. Even if he heard what I had been doing, I wasn’t about to act any different. At least that’s what I wanted, but my body seemed to have other plans, because my heart was pounding wildly in my chest, my cheeks were flushed, and I knew that I was still breathing hard.

            When Levi shut off the bedside lamp, I was ready for this day to be over. It had started bad and had ended worse. Maybe this was for the best. My time spent in the underground shouldn’t be wasted on pining over Levi. There were a lot of things I needed to learn if I was ever going to see my mom again.

            As I was thinking all this, Levi rolled over in bed, pressing his front to my back. My breath hitched in my throat, which gave me no time to react when his hands began to roam down my chest, fingers gliding downward until they took hold of the waistband of my pajama bottoms.

            “What are you doing?” I squeaked, embarrassed that my voice had given away my reaction to him touching me.

            His lips skimmed along my ear as he whispered, “You were touching yourself while thinking of me. Do you think I can hold back now?”

            I swallowed. “Um… Listen. I—”

            His hand slid down further and teased the head of my erection, making my whole body quiver in response. “A lot can happen to us down here, Eren. There’s no guarantee that we’ll live to see another day. How could I be everything you want when we live in a place like this? Do you even realize who I am?”

            I bit down on my bottom lip, stifling the sounds that were rising in my throat. “I don’t”—I whimpered as he began to stroke me faster, cutting off my words—“care that you’re a thug. I want you as you are.”

            He pressed fevered kisses to the back of my neck. “As I am,” he whispered. “I’m a horrible man.”

            “You’re not. You can’t help the things that you’ve done. You were just trying to survive, keep Isabel and Farlan safe.”

            “I’ve killed people.”

            “I know.”

            “I’m willing to kill anyone who threatens their lives, who threaten yours.”

            I looked at him over my shoulder. “I’m willing to do the same.”

            He searched my eyes and the next thing I knew, his lips were on mine. I wrapped my arm around his neck, clinging onto him, willing him to stay with me. All the desperation I was feeling was put into the kiss, and he responded to it, working my member with quick flicks of his wrist, making me moan into his mouth.

            “Want to touch you too,” I breathed, surprised I could speak at all.

            “We’re taking this slow, Eren.”

            I wanted to protest, but became lost in the throes of pleasure. The only noises I heard were my cries and moans as the pressure was building inside me. I couldn’t even grasp onto my thoughts as I came, my cock throbbing against his palm.

            When I finally regained the ability to think, all Levi said was: “You’re mine.”     

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa-ho-ho! What do we have here? (¬‿¬)
> 
> I actually like how Levi is holding back and is willing to take things slow, because in all honestly, when you're a virgin, it's embarrassing to do anything sexual. At least that's how it was for me, but let's not even go there. Am I right?
> 
> As always, thank you so much for reading and commenting. You guys are babelicious! ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)
> 
> Hold up, before I go, can I give a special shout out to Lonely, who comments on every chapter and also thanks me for writing it. *muffled sobbing* You're a total babe!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took a bit longer to update, but I've been incredibly busy with work, and the last couple of days I've been sick. So, needless to say, I still haven't had the time to reply to comments. Ah, I'm sorry! I like everyone's feedback, so forgive me for not being able to reply to you. :(
> 
> I hope this chapter makes up for it, though it's a bit sad. But, go on and read. :)

Taking it slow was a lot easier than I had been expecting it to be. Being completely inexperienced made me lack the confidence to initiate anything, and when Levi finally got fed up and started something, I would blush nonstop and wind up embarrassing myself.

            Luckily for me, today we would be focusing on training. Levi had called over Auruo and a man named Erd to help me with my fighting technique. This was something that I could handle, that I understood, so it was easy to concentrate on the man moving in front of me. He was a bit taller than me, with blonde hair that was pulled back in a folded ponytail.

            The man, Erd, moved toward me, and I dodged his attack at the last second, spinning around to block the kick that was aimed at my bad arm.

            “Good,” he said, encouraging me. “Always protect your weakness.”

            Auruo snorted. “I would have healed weeks ago.”

            I shot him a glare. “I have nerve damage. It feels heavier than usual.”

            “Don’t explain yourself to him,” Levi said, walking toward Erd and me. He was shirtless, his abs glistening with sweat in the summer sun. I never thought sweat could be sexy, but that was before I knew Levi, who could make filth look irresistible. “You’ve been making a lot of progress with it.”

            Erd nodded in agreement. “I think he’ll be ready for this upcoming mission. What do you think, Levi?”

            “We’ll see how he’s doing by then.”

            I wanted to press for more information, but knowing Levi, he wouldn’t reveal anything to me unless he wanted to. It wouldn’t matter if I nagged him, if he didn’t want me to know, I wouldn’t know. Still, that didn’t stop me from giving him a little frown, which made him smirk—a sight that was rare. I stared at him, dumbfounded.

            “Well,” Erd said, clapping me on the shoulder. “I don’t know about you, but I could use a little break. What do you say?”

            “Yeah, I could go for a break.” Truth be told, I could train for the rest of the day. I wanted to get in tiptop shape, but I knew that overworking my body wouldn’t do me any good in the long run. I had to be ready for action at a moment’s notice, which meant that I couldn’t have sore, aching limbs.

            Auruo came striding up to me, looking as arrogant as ever. “You do realize that you beating me was a one time thing.”

            I smirked. “Are you calling for a do over?”

            “Any time. I’ll take you on right now, if you want.”

            I moved into a fighting stance, but before anything could happen, Levi grabbed me by the arm, jerking me in the direction of his house. I didn’t say anything as he dragged me into the kitchen, pointing to an empty chair next to Erd, who was snacking on an orange. I sighed, sitting down.

            Isabel sat at the end of the table, staring off to the side. For the last couple of days, her mood had taken a turn for the worst. She wanted to go to Trost to check up on Farlan, but Levi wouldn’t let her step foot outside of the underground. It wouldn’t be long before she tried to make it out without him knowing.

            “Hey,” Levi said to her, ruffling her hair. “Do you want to go to the market with Auruo?”

            She shook her head. “I want to stay home in case Farlan comes back.”

            Levi winced as though that statement had physically hurt him, but he was quick to recover from his slip up. “You won’t be out for long. I’ll let you buy a caramel apple.”

            “Come on,” Auruo said, going to stand behind her chair to shake her by the shoulders. “We’ll hurry back.”

            She sighed, pushing back in her seat to come to a stand. “We better not take too long.”

            Auruo made a cross over his heart with his index finger. “You have my word. Now we better get a move on if you want to hurry back.”

            It wasn’t long after they left that Erd decided to join them, jogging out the front door to catch up. I sat looking after him, wondering why he had suddenly changed his mind. It was then that Levi moved behind my seat, slipping his hand beneath my chin, coaxing my head back.

            I looked up at him. “What—Hn!” He kissed me, and I gasped in surprise. He used this as an opportunity to slip his tongue into my mouth, the tip grazing along mine. A shiver traveled down my spine and I reached both my arms up to wrap them around his neck, pulling him closer to me.

            His hands moved down my chest, grasping onto the front of my shirt to yank it to either side. The sound of buttons scattering on the wood flooring beneath me barely registered as he scraped his nails down my stomach, tearing a moan from my lips, lips that he assaulted with his own.

            My body felt weak, like it was burning from the inside out. It was always like this when I was with him: as though every cell in my body was on fire, fire that warmed my blood and caressed my skin with blazing heat.

            My arms lost all the strength they possessed, slipping off from around his neck. He kept kissing me through it, stepping around the chair to stand in front of me, leaning down to continue to devour my mouth with slow flicks of his tongue that were pulling obscene sounds out of me.

            His fingertips grazed along my lower abdomen, making me squirm. I was caught between wanting him to hurry up, and needing him to slow down. It was bright in the kitchen. He would be able to see every part of me with clarity, which made my cheeks go from a subtle pink, to a deep scarlet. Up until now, we had done everything in the dark.

            “Wait,” I panted, moaning when he nipped along my jaw, licking and biting a trail to my neck.

            “Why?” he asked, fingers unfastening the button of my jeans.

            I couldn’t breathe, let alone think. Every part of me wanted him to keep going. I wanted to feel his lips on every inch of my body, wanted to have the flavor of him on the tip of my tongue, but I still didn’t know if I was ready. A very big part of me felt guilty for doing this. While my mom thought I was being held hostage in the underground, I was sitting here having my hipbone kissed and sucked on.

            “I don’t know what to do,” I said, taking advantage of the time I still had the capacity to speak.

            “I’ll teach you.”

            I inhaled sharply as he jerked my pants and boxers down, forcing me to lift up my hips, but before he could get them off all the way, there was a knock at the front door. My hands shot down, grasping onto my jeans to keep them in place.

            Levi’s eyes moved up to mine. “They won’t come in.”

            “Maybe it’s important.”

            “I couldn’t care less,” he said, biting my hip. I jerked, a shudder rippling down my body.

            “It could be about Isabel.” I swallowed, trying to maintain my rational thinking. None of his men came unless it was about something of importance. “It could be about Farlan, too.”

            His jaw strained under the pressure of him clenching his teeth, but he stood up, walking to the front door in long strides. He all but yanked it open, the hinges screeching in protest. “This better be fucking important.”

            The man standing on the porch flinched back at Levi’s tone of voice, but he quickly blurted out, “Some of Reece’s men were spotted near the hospice Farlan is staying in.”

            “Shit,” Levi hissed. “Go out and find Auruo and Erd. They’re at the market with Isabel. Tell them I need them back here now. And find Gunther, too. I need all my best men.”

            The man nodded, turning around to run off and complete the orders he was given. I stood up, zipping up my fly before I went to go stand in front of Levi.

            “No,” he said, taking one look at my face. “You can’t come. I don’t even know why you’re thinking of such a thing. Your mother’s life will be in danger if you step foot outside of the underground. Or have you forgotten?”

            I gritted my teeth together. “I didn’t forget.”

            “Then?”

            “Are you going to be okay?”

            He pushed passed me. “What kind of question is that? Of course I’ll be okay. I managed just fine before you stumbled head first into my life.”

            I followed him into his room. “I know that.” I didn’t want to admit that I would worry about him the whole time he was gone; it didn’t even matter that he was the strongest thug in the underground. When it came to him, I was weak. Now I knew what Reece had been talking about that day he threatened my mom’s life.

            Was I Levi’s weakness, as well?

            “I’ll be fine,” Levi said, slipping on his black trench coat. “Stay here and make sure Isabel is safe. I’ll have several of my men stand guard outside the house. If anything happens, don’t try to be the hero. Run. Do you understand me?”

            I wanted to tell him that I didn’t run from anything, but nodded in response.

            “When Isabel gets back, don’t tell her what’s really going on. She’s just as impulsive as you. The last thing I need is for the both of you to show up at the hospice. It’ll only cause me problems.”

            “I get it,” I said.

            He tapped my forehead with his fist. “I’m just trying to get it through your thick skull.”

            I crossed my arms over my chest. “I wouldn’t put my mom’s life at risk.”

            “That’s the only thing that’s stopping you.”

            “So?”

            He twined his fingers in my hair, taking purchase of the strands between his fingers to yank me down to his height. “Nothing,” he whispered, and then he kissed me for a brief moment before he pulled away. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

            I regained my voice in time to call out: “Same for you.”

            I stood in the middle of his room, listening to the sound of the front door opening and closing with a soft click. What was Reece up to? Why was he traveling into Trost to keep track of Farlan’s well being? Did he really want to finish him off? He got what he wanted. I was stuck here in the underground without access to any funds. What else was he striving for?

            When Isabel finally got home a while later, she didn’t even question where Levi had run off to, which seemed unusual to me, but I wasn’t about to ask her about it. If we could get through the night normally, that would be good. Right now I needed a good distraction to keep my thoughts in check.

            “What would you be doing if you were at home right now?” Isabel asked, lying back on the living room floor. “We don’t have anything to do here. It gets really boring.”

            I went to lie down next to her. “I’d probably be watching TV, which isn’t that great.”

            She stayed silent for a long time, staring at a spot on the ceiling. When she spoke, her voice was a soft whisper. “This has something to do with Farlan, doesn’t it? Don’t lie to me, Eren.”

            I looked at her, contemplating on whether to tell her the truth. But she deserved that, didn’t she? She didn’t deserve to be fed lies. “Yes.”

            “I thought so,” she said.

            “It will be okay.”

            She turned on her side to face me. “If he dies, I won’t really have anything anymore. Levi has you now. I’m just something he has to worry about, something he protects because he feels obligated to. He found me when I was six. I was starving and roaming the streets. Since then, I’ve always been nothing but a weight he carries.”

            “That’s not true. He cares for you.”

            “I know,” she said. “But that doesn’t make me anymore useful. I only get in the way, but with Farlan… I don’t know. Everything felt all right with him around. Now things just feel so empty.”

            “Things will be okay,” I repeated, not knowing if they would be, but we had to hope that everything would turn out for the best, right? We couldn’t sit here and accept a loss that hasn’t happened yet. Farlan could still be alive. Levi could’ve made it to Trost in time to prevent Reece’s men from doing anything.

            “How are you okay right now?” Isabel asked. “Doesn’t your mom volunteer at the hospice?”

            I don’t know how that thought had never occurred to me, but it hadn’t. “Shit!” I sprung to my feet, but Isabel snatched my wrist, using all her weight to hold me back. “Let go! They could’ve hurt her. I have to go.”

            “You can’t. If she’s okay, she won’t be if you leave the underground.”

            “What if she isn’t?”

            “Then there’s nothing you can do.”

            I yanked my hand free, glaring down at her. “I’ll kill every single man that laid a finger on her. I’ll kill them!”

            “That wouldn’t bring her back,” she murmured. “You think I don’t want to go see if Farlan’s all right? I’ve been wanting to, but the truth is this: We’d only make things worse. Stay put. Wait for Levi to come back. If he tells you something happened to your mom, then by all means, go deal with as many of Reece’s men as you want. But until then, don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

            I clenched and unclenched my hands. “Why would I regret it?”

            “Because if you go, and she’s still alive, you’ll be killing her. You’ll also be putting Levi’s life at risk, because he will do anything to protect you. I don’t think you understand how much you mean to him.”

            “He wouldn’t die for me.”

            She got to her feet, walking over to the window. She slid the curtains to the side, peering out into the darkness. “He would. After you, things would never be the same. With you, he’s tasted freedom. He’s felt warmth and love that he’s never known before.”

            “L-Love?” My mind couldn’t wrap around that word. There was no way that he could love me yet. We hadn’t been seeing each other for that long, and what we had wasn’t normal. Hell, nothing was normal in the underground.

            She looked at me over her shoulder. “Society makes you think that love can only happen after a certain amount of time. That anything before that isn’t really love, but what the fuck do they know? Nothing, that’s what. Tell me, Eren: Do you love him?”

            I shut my eyes, taking a deep breath. Did I love Levi? That wasn’t a question I had asked myself. Love had never crossed my mind. What was love anyway? I had never experienced it before. For me, it had always been something I read in books, or watched in movies. It wasn’t something that I ever thought could actually happen to be, but…

            Was I in love with Levi?

            “I don’t know,” I said.

            “You do. You’re just too afraid to admit it to yourself. So is he, because love is complicated and makes you do the stupidest things.” She suddenly whirled around, kicking me so hard in the stomach that I crumpled forward. “I’m sorry Eren, but I can’t sit here and do nothing.”

            I couldn’t focus on anything but the pain shooting through my stomach, pain that was making me dry heave. She had said that love made you do stupid things and this was a fine example of that. I had to stop her.

            I tried to straighten up, but I fell to my knees instead, my forehead smacking on the floor. My body didn’t want to respond to my insistent requests. If I didn’t get up soon, she would find a way to get passed the men. She wasn’t stupid, and had probably thought everything out beforehand.

            Time ticked by as I forced myself up, fighting the wave of nausea that threatened to render me useless. I could do this. Pain was all in the mind. If I could stop thinking about it, then I would be able to run. That’s what I had to do right now. I had to run. I had to get to Isabel.

            “Come on,” I said passed clenched teeth. “Come the fuck on.” I took a step forward, ignoring the need to hurl. I took another step, my eyes locking onto the front door that had been left wide open. None of Levi’s men were out there. She had distracted them somehow.

            Fuck!

            As my pace quickened, I felt a sharp pain in my side, but I pushed myself to run out the door. I didn’t stop, taking the stairs two at a time. If Isabel left the underground, there would be nothing I could do for her. I couldn’t cross that line, not if I wanted my mom to live. But what if Reece had already attacked her? What if this had been his plan from the beginning? For me to leave her defenseless so he could get to her?

            He had said that he wanted me to live like the rest of the people in the underground did. A lot of people here had experienced loss, devastation. Was that his goal for me?

            The ache in my side continued to get worse as I sprinted down alleyways, running passed people who stared at me in confusion. What was I going to do? What _could_ I do? The only options that were given to me would leave someone harmed. Could I leave the underground without Reece’s men spotting me? If I did, could I get to my mom on time?

            These thoughts pounded in my head as I neared the exit of the underground. I had a choice to make before then, but what would it be?

            “Eren!”

            At the sound of my name, I skidded to a stop, looking around. Isabel was hidden in the shadows, a few inches from crossing the line into the city. I stared at her as she stared at me, and I knew that she had waited here for me, because she had assumed that I would come after her.

            I took a step closer to her and she lifted her hand up in warning. “Don’t,” she said. “Don’t come any closer.”

            “What? Why?”

            She pointed up and my eyes followed the direction, spotting a man looking down at me from a window overhead. “He’s just waiting for you to leave the underground.”

            I balled my hands into fists. “Don’t leave.”

            “I have to. If Farlan’s dead, I won’t come back, Eren. I can’t keep living here. I don’t care what I have to do to make it in Trost, but I’ll do it.”

            “Isabel,” I whispered, the word a strained sound in the darkness that was threatening to consume us. “What about Levi?”

            “I already told you: He has you now. He’ll be okay if you stay.”

            I shook my head, refusing to believe what I was hearing. “What if Farlan is alive? Will you come back?”

            She dropped her eyes, a sigh escaping her. “I’m not sure. I’m not sure about anything anymore.”

            There had to be something I could do. I couldn’t let her leave, but at the same time, it was her choice to make. If she wanted out of the underground, then I could understand. But if she left, then it would be my fault. Levi expected me to watch over her, to protect her. If she left, she would be on her own. There was no guarantee that she would make it out there.

            I reached my hand out to her, wanting her to stay, but knowing that it was a selfish act on my part. “Neither am I,” I told her. “But…”

            “But nothing, Eren. If Reece killed your mom, then do yourself a favor and get out of here, too. All that awaits you in the underground is pain and fear and remorse. You’ll be forced to do things that you never wanted to do, and the guilt will stay with you for the rest of your life.”

            We made eye contact and I could see the pain she was feeling. I didn’t know what her life had been like, but I knew that she had suffered a lot.  

            “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m sorry that there was nothing I could do to help you.”

            “You _can_ help me. Stay with Levi. Convince him to get out of here while he still can.”   

            “I’ll try.”

            “That’s all I ask for,” she whispered, and then she was gone, running away from the underground that had held her captive for her entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My heart. The next couple of chapters will be crazy, hectic ones, but I'm actually looking forward to writing them.
> 
> If you'd like to get a hold of me: my Instagram is @levi.eren_ and my tumblr is warriorflesh. 
> 
> Thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos! I love you all!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um…wow. This chapter went somewhere unexpected and I hope you guys can forgive me. Or maybe not, because I don't think I'll even be able to forgive myself. 
> 
> But, with that said, go on and read. :(

Letting Isabel go alone had been a mistake. She had no training under her belt. If one of Reece’s men were to snatch her up, they could do so without any trouble. I should’ve forced her to stay. Yes, it wasn’t my place to keep her here, but if doing so meant keeping her safe, then I shouldn’t have hesitated.

            And now it was too late.

            If anything happened to her, the blame would be mine. I had the chance to stop her, but I had willingly watched her leave. Now, she was at the mercy of Reece’s men. I knew that if any harm came to her, Levi would never forgive me. _I_ would never forgive myself. So was I really going to sit around here and wait? Or was I going to do something to correct my mistake?       

            It was true that I wasn’t allowed to leave the underground, but Reece had also said that I was supposed to live like the people here did. If that were the case, then I should be with Levi. Many of his men were out there with him, and now that I was a part of his gang, then that entitled me to be out there by his side, too. Reece couldn’t argue with me on that, and if he wanted to try, then I’d be ready.

            Gathering up some supplies, including the pocketknife I had stolen, I set off toward the building I knew one of Reece’s men was hiding in. Even if I had every right to fight alongside Levi, Reece wasn’t a fair man, so I wasn’t going to take any chances. I would take out the man in the building and anyone who got in my way. There couldn’t be any eyewitnesses to me leaving the underground. If I could manage that, then my mom would stay safe until I reached her.

            When I finally made it to the building, darkness covered my every move. I could do this unseen. That wouldn’t be the difficult part. The difficult part would be whether there were more men in there then just the one. If there were, I’d have to take them all out without fail. None of them could be left standing. Otherwise they’d report back to Reece, then all hell would break loose.

            Slowing down my pace, I scanned my surroundings, making sure the coast was clear before I slipped inside the building through a broken window. I landed as softly as I could manage, wishing there was some form of light so I could see where I was stepping, but the room I was in was pitch black. But I knew the man from earlier still had to be here. He wouldn’t leave his post until he was given the order to, and Reece was still in Trost.

            As I gradually made my way to the staircase, I pulled out the pocketknife from my front pocket, flipping it open so the blade was out. Even in the darkness, I could make out the shine of it. I never wanted to kill anyone. That had never been my intention when I accepted being a part of Levi’s gang, but now I understood why Levi said he didn’t want this life for me. When it came to things like killing someone, sometimes you just had no choice—it was either them, or you.

            I strained my ears as I walked up the flight of stairs, listening for any sudden noises, but there were none. The place was completely silent except for the sound of my soft breathing. Had the lookout man spotted me before I entered? Was he waiting for me upstairs? I had to be prepared for a sudden attack. I couldn’t let my guard down, not even for a second.

            Holding the pocketknife at my side when I reached the last step, I stopped, trying to make out what was in front of me, but it was far too dark to see anything. I pressed my back against the wall, deciding it would be better if I just took whoever was in there by surprise. If there was one man, I could handle that with ease. If there were several, then there really wasn’t a point in me sneaking into the room. They would grab me the moment I stepped passed the doorway.

            I couldn’t waste anymore time dawdling on the fact that I may be greatly outnumbered. I had to go after Isabel and hope that nothing bad had happened to her.

            The thought of Isabel strengthened my resolve and I ran into the room, expecting to see men surrounding me within seconds, but there was only one. The instant his eyes landed on me, he was up on his feet, the dim lantern in the corner barely illuminating his profile. I didn’t wait for him to make the first move, rushing toward him to shove him against the wall.

            I pressed my arm against his neck, keeping him in place. “Is there anyone else here?”

            He wrapped his hand around my upper arm. “Why the fuck should I tell you?”

            “Because”—I applied pressure to his neck, feeling his Adam’s apple strain against the weight of my arm—“you don’t really know what I’m capable of. So, if I were you, I’d answer the question.” I withdrew my arm a little, watching him suck in a breath of air before he narrowed his eyes at me.

            “There’s only me,” he said. “But up ahead, where you intend on heading, there are more men. Even if you take me out, they’ll get you.”

            I smirked. “Thanks for the information.” I withdrew my arm to bring it toward my shoulder before swinging it forward, knocking my elbow against his head. He fell to the floor in a heap, knocked out, and I knelt down to search his pockets, finding nothing but a rusty blade.

            Did Reece really expect this man to take me out? This all seemed too easy. There should have been more men stationed here, or were they all at the hospice like this man had said? If that were the case, then Reece had been expecting me to leave the underground since the very beginning.

            The bastard. What was his plan? He had to have some ulterior motive to go through all this hassle. Was it to lure me out of the underground? Was he just waiting for his men to tell him that I had left to make his move?

            There were too many lives at stake and I wasn’t sure if what I was about to do was the right move, but what else could I do? Reece hadn’t left me with much of a choice, and it felt like I was walking straight into a trap. In fact, I was sure that’s what this was and everyone had done exactly what Reece had been expecting them to do. No matter what, someone was going to wind up getting hurt tonight.

            All I could do now was play his game. Even if I stayed here, I was sure that he would still go through with whatever he was planning to do. He wouldn’t go through all this trouble to drop it just because I didn’t end up coming. But knowing him, he knew I wouldn’t sit back and do nothing. He knew I would come.

            I cursed under my breath, leaving the building at a sprint. I ran as fast as my feet would carry me, rushing through streets that were all too familiar to me. I didn’t stop, not even when I made it into Trost. I couldn’t stop until I reached the hospice, but was I too late? It had been hours since Levi had left, and a lot of things could’ve happened within that time.

            With that thought in mind, I pushed myself to go faster, knowing that every second counted. What was this all about? What were Reece’s intentions? And what was he trying to prove?

            When I finally made it to the hospice, I scanned the parking lot, taking note of my mom’s truck. She was still here, which confirmed that something was going on. She never stayed this late.

            My stomach plummeted and my legs felt heavy as I trudged toward the double doors. They opened before me and I was met with an empty sitting room. There were no security guards. The place was completely deserted, or at least that’s what it had been made to look like. I knew there were plenty of people hidden within the rooms.

            I stepped inside, listening to the doors shut behind me. There were no clues as to where I should go, so I walked to the backrooms. That’s where Farlan should be, and if Levi were still here, that’s where he would be too.

            The silence seemed to swallow me whole, the sound of my footsteps echoing in the empty hallways. The fluorescent lights above me lit every nook and cranny, yet I still felt like someone was going to pop out at any moment. My hand tightened around the handle of the pocketknife, and I felt reassured with it in my grasp.

            All the rooms I passed were dark, the lights shut off, so when I crossed one that had its lights on, I immediately stopped, turning toward it. I reached forward, taking hold of the doorknob with a firm grip. I pushed the door open and what I saw before me almost made me hurl, but I just stood there, unable to move, unable to speak. All I could do was stare at the blood that coated the medical bed.

            I don’t know how long I stood there for, but when I heard a deep chuckle, I jolted.

            “It’s about time you showed up,” Reece said from somewhere inside the room. “Now the fun can really begin. Why don’t you come on inside here, Eren? We’ve all been waiting for you.”

            I forced myself to walk into the room, met with the stench of spilled blood. It wafted up, seeming to wrap me inside its coppery smell. Who was dead? With the amount of blood on the bed, someone had to have died.

            “That’s a good boy,” Reece cooed, and I saw that he sat in the corner of the room on a lounge chair. “We can finally finish up now that you’re here.”

            Sitting next to him on the floor was Levi, Isabel, Farlan, and my mom. Their hands had been tied behind their back and blood was smeared across their faces and necks. They didn’t meet my eyes as I stepped closer to them.

            “What did you do?” I asked.

            “Oh. Are you referring to the blood over on the bed?” Reece brought a dirty finger to his lips, grinning. “There was a young nurse that just refused to leave. I gave her several warnings, but apparently she wasn’t up for listening to them.” He chuckled, his beady eyes dropping to my mom. “Your dear mother here was given a choice: either kill the nurse, or let me give the order to have one of my men go and kill you.”

            I clenched my hands. “You goddamn bastard!”

            He shrugged, unfazed by my outburst. “Everyone will be given a choice tonight, Eren—several, in fact. Levi already had to off several of his men to save our dear little Isabel over here.” His finger jutted out, pointing at the girl who sat next to Farlan. She was clutching her side, her breathing labored. “But, and here’s the best part, I gave Isabel a choice, as well; that choice being to stab herself in the side to save Farlan. As you can see, she did it.”

            Farlan gritted his teeth, but Levi gave him a soft shake of his head.

            “What’s my choice?” I asked.

            Reece stood up, taking his time to give me an answer. He stretched his arms over his head, his back popping in response. “Ah, that’s much better. Now”—he walked passed me, shutting the door with a flick of his wrist—“let’s get to your choice Eren. I see that you and Levi have become quite close.”

            I looked over at Levi, who had his eyes on me. “Get to the point already.”

            “That’s what I like about you,” Reece said. “You have a strong back bone, but will it be strong enough to do what I’m going to ask of you. If you take your time in deciding, Isabel will bleed out. After all, she’s been sitting here waiting for you to show up for the last couple of hours. How much longer do you think she has?”

            I strode up to him. “Just give me my choice.”

            He chuckled. “All right. If you’re so eager, then let’s get on with it.” He turned his back to me, his index finger flicking from my mom, to Levi. “Kill one. That’s your choice. You can kill either Levi, or your own mother. Don’t even think about leaving, because this hospice is crawling with my men. You wouldn’t make it far, and even if you did, you’d be losing more than just one person.”

            “It’s okay, Eren,” Levi said when he noticed my horrified expression. “You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if you take your mom’s life.”

            I shook my head. “I…”

            “No,” my mom intervened, coming to a stand. “This won’t end here, Eren. If you murder Levi, then where will that leave you? You’ll be left unprotected and this man will also rule the underground. Think about it. He wants you to choose Levi, but that won’t solve anything.” She came to stand in front of me, tears running down her face. “But if you choose me, then there will be no obligation for you to follow the rules of the underground.”

            “I can’t…” I swallowed, shutting my eyes as my body began to shake. “I can’t kill you. I won’t.”

            “Eren, look at me.” She waited until I opened my eyes to continue. “I killed an innocent woman tonight. Even if I lived, I would spend the rest of my life in prison. I know you don’t want to do this, but this is the right choice.”

            “No.” The word was nothing but a breath of air that escaped my mouth. I couldn’t kill her. I wasn't capable of taking her life.

            “Times a wastin’,” Reece said, suddenly untying my mom’s hands. “I don’t have all night to hear you prattling on and on.”

            I looked at him. “Why are you doing this?”

            “Because I can,” he answered right away. “And you’re the only one who Levi will let kill him.”

            “So you do want me to pick him. If you want him dead, then why don’t you finish him off yourself?”

            He barked out a laugh. “You’re the only reason he’s still here. If you weren’t in his life, then he would’ve been back at his house a long time ago. He wouldn’t have cared about the casualties, but since he cares about you, he didn’t want to see your mother die. Now he’s stuck in this situation, which is a shame. The strongest thug in the underground has surrendered his heart to a mere brat.”

            “Stop hesitating,” Levi snapped. “You’re wasting time. You know you don’t want to kill your mom, so—”

            “I don’t want to kill you either!” I said, interrupting him.

            Farlan looked at Isabel, who had slumped backward against the wall. “You have to choose between the two of them, Eren. You don’t have a choice. The longer you take, the more chances Isabel has of dying. So hurry up and decide.”

            “It’s not that easy,” I told him.

            “I know it’s not, but if you don’t make a choice soon, then _two_ people will die before your eyes.”

            How could I possibly do this? I never wanted to kill anyone. Now I had to choose between the two people that meant the most to me.

            “Did I forget to mention that your time is limited?” Reece said in a singsong voice. “If you don’t hurry on up, then I’ll just kill everyone in this room. That won’t be a problem for me. Hell, it would make my life a whole lot easier. But out of the kindness of my heart, I decided to give you a choice. Now don’t disappoint me little boy, and get a move on.”

            “You fuck! You’re the one I’ll kill!” The pocketknife I still held trembled in my grasp. “It may not be today, but one day I’ll kill you! I’ll—” My mom suddenly reached out, grasping onto my wrist to drive the blade of the pocketknife into her belly. “ _NOOO! NO!_ ” She fell into my arms and I tumbled down onto my knees, bearing her weight. “No. Why… Why did you do that? Why? Why?” My eyes locked onto the blade, which was deeply embedded into her stomach. Blood gushed out around it, and I knew she had purposely hit a major artery.

            “It’s okay,” she whispered, her blood-soaked hand coming up to cup my cheek. “This is how it has to be.”

            “No. No. Don’t die. Please don’t die. I need you.” I pulled her against me, sobbing into the crook of her neck. “Don’t leave me. I can’t lose you.”

            “Shh, I’ll never leave you. I’ll always be right by your side, but now you have to listen to me. The medical staff won’t—” She coughed, and when she inhaled, her lungs sounded full of water. But it wasn’t water… wasn’t water… “The medical staff won’t find me until morning. That gives you eight hours to go to the ATM and withdraw all the money in my account. I know you won’t leave the underground, so stock up on supplies and do what you have to do in order to get out of there.”

            “Kill Reece,” I whispered. “I’ll kill Reece.”

            “Don’t think about that…now. Not…now.” Her voice was fading and I sat up straight to look down at her face. She smiled up at me. “Don’t blame…yourself for…this.”

            I watched her smile fade, watched the light in her eyes dim into nothingness. The color left her cheeks and there was nothing left of my mom except for a body that was already beginning to grow cold. I had failed her. How could I not blame myself, when this was all my fault?

            I wouldn’t let her death go unpunished. One day, I would kill Reece. I’d watch him die. I’d make him suffer…

            “Eren.”

            My eyes automatically moved up to the face above me. “She’s dead.”

            Levi put his hand on my shoulder. “I know, and I’m sorry.” He clenched his teeth. “I’m so sorry, Eren.”

            “She’s dead,” I repeated, unable to say anything else. “I killed her.”

            “No. This isn’t your fault, and you will get your revenge. I’ll see to that.”

            “Levi,” Farlan said. “We have to go. Isabel isn’t looking good.”

            Levi nodded, and then turned back to me. “Eren, we have to go.”

            I shook my head. “No. I can’t leave her here. Don’t make me leave her here.”

            He knelt down beside me. “We have no other choice. Your fingerprints are everywhere. When the police get here, they’ll tie this to you, but as long as you’re in the underground, then I can keep you safe. So, we need to go now. After Reece untied us, he left, and I’m sure that he’ll set off the alarm once all his men are out.”

            I pushed my mom’s hair back, slowly dragging my fingers down her face to shut her eyelids. The pain I felt was so strong, that I was becoming numb to my surroundings. All I could see was my mom’s lifeless body in my arms. All the sounds around me merged into one to become white noise that rung loud in my ears. I had killed my own mom. She was dead because of me.

            Everything that happened after that was nothing more than a blur. I couldn’t feel Levi’s arms wrap around me, couldn’t feel him pull me up into his arms, away from my mom. I only saw her body lying on the tile floor, and I knew this would be the last time I saw her. The image of her like this would forever haunt me.

            I saw nothing else as Levi carried me out of the hospice. I knew he was talking, saying something to Farlan about Isabel, but I couldn’t take any of it in. There was nothing but the sight of my mom, and the image of her dull eyes consuming my every thought. I knew I was crying. I could feel the warm tears on my cheeks, but I couldn’t feel the pain anymore. I felt so numb, so dead.

            And I knew, without a doubt, that I would never recover from this. I would never be the same person, just as I was never the same after my dad’s death.

            Now, what did I have to live for?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I most likely won't be reading the comments for this chapter, because I know a lot of you will be upset with what happened. I honestly had no intentions on killing off Carla, but sometimes the story goes where you don't think it will go, and as a writer, it's basically your job to let it play out as it would. At least, that's what I do, because I want it to be as realistic as possible. 
> 
> Anyway, I'm going to go weep now, but thank you for the comments, the kudos, and the subscriptions. You guys are too kind to me! ❤


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly can't even think of what to write here. *sigh*  
> See what sleep deprivation does to people?
> 
> But, go on and read. :)

I was an open wound; a wound that would eventually scar over, but would forever leave a mark on my skin that would serve as a reminder of what happened the night my mom died in my arms. My head was pounding as I ran next to Levi, who had come up with a plan the second we were out of the hospice. We were on our way to my house, where we would get my mom’s debit card so we could withdraw all the money from her bank account from an ATM.

            He had killed four of his men in total on Reece’s order, but since he hadn’t brought his best men into the hospice, they were still alive and well. They ran beside us in silence, and for the first time, Auruo had nothing to say. I don’t think any of us did. We were simply completing a task, moving forward on autopilot.

            When we turned onto my street, my legs gave out and I fell to the ground, the palms of my hands skidding against the sidewalk. I stared down at the cement, breathing hard. There was nothing left in me. I was an empty vessel, and the only thing that was keeping me going was the need to avenge my mom’s death. If I gave up here, she would have died in vain.

            Levi put his hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged it off. I had treated living in the underground like a game, like I was away at summer camp. I always had something to come home to, _someone_ waiting for me. Now I had nothing. My life here in Trost was over, and when I returned to the underground, I would know how it felt to have no hope of escaping that place. _This_ is what Reece had wanted. He wanted me hopeless, wanted me to feel this aching devastation that wrapped itself around me in a death grip. Because this was the only way that I would truly know how it felt to be just like the people who were trapped in the underground—people like him, people like Isabel and Levi.

            I hated Reece for what he would force me to become, but I would live for the sole purpose of killing him. I would get my revenge, even if it meant becoming a monster in the process.

            “Eren,” Levi said, kneeling down in front of me.

            “How long have you been alone?” I asked, preventing him from continuing.

            “What?”

            “You don’t have any family. How long has it been that way?”

            He took my chin in his hand, tilting my face up to his. “I have family. They may not be blood-related, but that doesn’t mean I don’t consider them my family. Isabel, Farlan, Auruo, Gunther, Erd…you.” I made eye contact with him. “You’re not alone in this, Eren. I know it feels that way now, but I’ll never abandon you.”

            My arms shook, no longer able to support my weight, but before they could give out, he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against him. I grabbed handfuls of his shirt, burying my face against his chest. I couldn’t be weak when I needed to be strong. If I was going to make it passed this, I had to keep it together, but that seemed impossible. I felt incapable of fighting, but I knew that’s what I had to do. Giving up now wasn’t an option.

            I sat back on my heels before pushing myself up to a stand. I couldn’t cave into these emotions that were overwhelming me. I had to move forward. Only then could I set out to finish what I had to do.

            Kill Reece.

            “Let’s go,” I said, walking passed Levi. “I’m fine.”

            For the rest of the night, I kept my thoughts focused on one thought and one thought only: get back to the underground in time to help Isabel. With no other thoughts there to distract me, we were able to do things with ease. We withdrew the money from my mom’s bank account, took as much supplies from my house as we could carry, then made our way back to Levi’s house.

            “We can’t stay here for much longer,” Levi said after he sent two of his men to go fetch a woman by the name of Hanji. According to him, she would be able to help with Isabel’s injury. “We need to relocate to a place Reece doesn’t know about. He’s not going to stop keeping tabs on you if we stay here.”

            I stared down at Isabel, who was lying on her bed unconscious. “Where would we go? Is there any place down here that Reece doesn’t know about?”

            “Yes. Some of my men would have to set up a diversion while we move, but it can be done.”

            “And who’s this Hanji person?”

            “An old friend,” he said. “She can help us in more than one way, but now’s not the time to be discussing that. We have a lot to take care of tonight.” He glanced up at me. “You don’t have to stay, if it’s too much.”

            I shook my head, determined to help with anything I could. If he sent me to his room, I’d have no distractions to keep the impending thoughts of my mother at bay. “I’m fine.”

            He looked like he wanted to argue, but didn’t say a word.

            Farlan suddenly came into the room, a woman I had never seen before trailing behind him. She had a huge smile on her face, her brown eyes widening in what appeared as excitement when she peered down at Isabel’s side.

            “OH!” the woman said, going to stand next to the bed. “That’s a pretty flesh wound, now isn’t it?”

            Levi rolled his eyes. “I haven’t seen you in two years, and you haven’t changed a bit.”

            The woman, who I was assuming was Hanji, winked at him. “Neither have you. You’re still as short as ever.” She put her bag down on the nightstand. “It’s a very clean cut. It looks like she missed all her vital organs, which I’m guessing wasn’t done by accident. We’ve got a little smarty pants here.”

            “So, you can help her?” Farlan asked, his expression pained as he ran his fingers through Isabel’s hair.

            Hanji nodded. “Of course I can!” She smacked him on the shoulder, nearly knocking him onto the bed. “It should be a cinch. Just sit back and watch me work my magic.”

            All the skepticism I felt quickly vanished when Hanji got to work. She may be eccentric, but she really did know what she was doing. It took her no time at all to apply a local anesthetic to numb Isabel’s side so she could clean and stitch up the gash. Then, after Isabel woke up, she gave her painkillers to help her sleep for the rest of the night.

            “Not bad,” Levi said as he walked out of the room.

            Hanji laughed, putting her hand on his shoulder to give it a rough squeeze. “Doubting my skills, now are we?”

            “Perhaps for a moment.”

            She didn’t look offended at that. “Well, you owe me some of your rare tea leaves for this.”

            Levi looked taken aback. “Do you know how hard it is to come by those?”

            “I knew it!” Hanji said, laughing. “You’re still a tea freak.” She looked over at me. “He’d die for some of those rare tea leaves, but luckily for him, I don’t like tea. I’m more of a coffee person myself. Keeps me up and running.”

            “Disgusting,” Levi muttered.

            “Say that to my taste buds. They find it quite delicious.”

            While Hanji and Levi bickered, I snuck off to the washroom, shutting myself inside. I walked over to the spigot, twisting it until cool water splashed onto my hand. I began to scrub at my skin, yearning to get every drop of blood off my skin. Then I realized that I had it on my clothes, so I took several steps back, slipping out of my T-shirt and jeans. I chucked them to the side, shivering as I cupped a handful of cold water in the palm of my hands.

            I’d never be rid of her blood. It would always be on my hands. Even if I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed, it would remain there, because it was my fault that she was dead. I couldn’t wash away the blame.

            When my skin was burning from how many times I had dragged the loofah across it, I shut off the water, sinking down to my knees. My whole body shook, but I forced myself to my feet, grabbing a towel from off the cabinet shelf. I dried myself off with it, and then wrapped it around my waist.

            Tomorrow I would begin with my training. I had to become stronger if I was going to have any hope of defeating Reece at his own game. I wouldn’t let him win—not after what he had done. I’d get my revenge, even if it cost me my life, because Reece _had_ to die. He couldn’t go on living.

            Back in the house, I made my way to Levi’s bedroom. I didn’t want to run into anyone, didn’t want to have to talk or tell anyone how I felt. Right now all I wanted was to fall fast asleep. All I could hope for was that these thoughts that were tormenting me wouldn’t follow me into my dreams.

            As I got dressed, I finally noticed Levi leaning up against the wall by the door. When had he come in? I hadn’t heard anything.

            “We’ll be moving in a week’s time,” he said. “After Isabel has some time to recover from her injury.”

            “I want to train.”

            “I think you should lay low for a couple of—”

            “No,” I snapped. “I don’t want to lay low. There’s no need for me to take a breather. Wasting time isn’t allowed anymore. That’s all I’ve been doing while I’ve been here. Not anymore.”

            He pushed off the wall, coming to stand beside me. “Eren, look, I know you’re going through a lot right now, but pushing yourself—”

            “You don’t get it!” I turned my back to him. “My mom died because of me, because I was stupid! I thought I could handle things down here, but I didn’t really know what it was all about. You tried to warn me, but I refused to listen. I practically dug her grave!” I clenched my fists by my side. “I won’t stop, Levi. I won’t stop until Reece is dead.”

            For a long time, Levi said nothing, just stood behind me in silence. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet. “Don’t lose yourself for this.”

            I laughed, and the sound was full of bitterness. “I’ve already lost myself.”

            “No you haven’t.” He grabbed my shoulders, turning me around to face him. “You haven’t, Eren. If you give up who you are, then Reece will win in the end. You can get out of the underground. You have plenty of money to do that.”

            “The police will be looking for me.”

            “Change your appearance. Change your name. Hanji can help—”

            “I won’t run away from this! I _can’t_ run away from this. Don’t you get it? He took away everything. My mom meant everything to me, and now she’s gone. She’s gone because of me. I can’t…” I shook my head, trembling. The tears built up in my eyes until they spilt over, coursing down my cheeks. “I can’t run away. I have nothing to live for anymore. The only thing I can do now is kill Reece.”

            He cupped my face. “That’s not true. You’re only sixteen years old. You can still have a life. You don’t have to be stuck here.”

            “If I leave, I won’t just be running away from Reece. I’d be running from the law, as well. I won’t live my life in fear.”

            Levi pushed the hair that fell on my forehead back, looking me in the eyes. “I’ll support you in whatever you decide to do, then.”

            “Thank you.”

            “No need to thank me, kid,” he said. “You should catch some sleep now. You need it.”

            I nodded, padding over to the bed. I climbed onto it, pulling the blanket up to slip my legs beneath it. I was tired. My body yearned for rest, but the instant my head hit the pillow, my mind was bombarded with images of my mom’s limp body laying on the floor of that hospital room. Was she still there now? Even when someone found her body in the morning, she wouldn’t be taken to the morgue right away. A forensic team would be called in to take pictures and gather up any evidence…

            I couldn’t think about this. If I continued to do so, I would bring myself down long before I could get my hands on Reece.

            “Hey,” Levi whispered, sliding in next to me. He wrapped his arm around my waist, moving in closer. “Everything will be ok. I’ll take care of you. Always.”

            As I lay there next to him, feeling his fingers glide through my hair in a comforting motion, I knew Isabel had been right. I was afraid to admit to myself what I felt for him. I had no prior experience, didn’t know how to identify love, or if it could even be identified. I just knew that I wanted to be with him, and that I felt safe when he was around. I also knew that I wanted to protect him at all costs.

            “I can do it, if I have you around,” I whispered sleepily. “I can become strong. I can kill Reece.”

            “Shh, don’t think about any of that right now. Just go to sleep.” He kissed my forehead and I clung onto him. I wanted to tell him how I felt, but I was terrified of how he would respond. Despite everything that happened, I still couldn’t say the things I longed to say. But…there was no guarantee in this life. I could lose him. And what if that happened before I told him how I felt?

            In the blink of an eye, I had lost my mom. The same thing could happen to Levi. Would I be able to forgive myself if I didn’t tell him?

            Turning away, I snatched up the blanket, pulling it up to my chin. If I could go back, there were many things I would tell my mom. I would tell her how grateful I was that she had put up with me, that she never abandoned me, even after losing her husband. But now, I would never get the chance, and I’d be damned if I let that happen again.

            Building up the courage to confess was a lot harder than expected. Still, I had to tell him. Even if he didn’t return my sentiments, I needed to let him know.

            “I”—I swallowed, squeezing my eyes shut—“love you, Levi.” There. It was out in the open now.

            Levi gave me no response, but then again, I hadn’t expected him to. Even so, I felt relieved. He knew how I felt about him now. I had made the choice to tell him, and held no regrets in doing so. That’s how I would strive to live from now on: without any regrets.

            The heaviness of my limbs proved to be too much, because I fell into a deep sleep within seconds of my confession.

            Time slipped away, and when I woke up some time later, I bolted up in bed, sweat making my T-shirt cling to my body. My mom’s face swam in my line of vision until I clamped my eyes shut. I had relived her death over and over in my nightmare, and every time, I couldn’t do a single thing to help her.

            I pressed my hand to my chest, feeling my fast heartbeat beneath my fingertips. It should have been me. I should’ve been the one to die in that hospital room. This had all started with me, so it should have ended with me, but she had willingly sacrificed her life for mine. Why? My life wasn’t worth as much as hers.

            “Eren?” Levi whispered, his voice scratchy from having barely woken up. When I didn’t answer, he slung his arm around my waist, yanking me down to him. I let him hold me against his chest, but I still felt hollow inside. There would always be something missing. “Go back to sleep.”

            “No.”

            He grabbed my chin between thumb and forefinger, tipping my face up. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but things will get better. It won’t always hurt this much.”

            I yanked my chin out of his grasp. “It’ll always be my fault.”

            “Your mother sacrificed herself for you,” he said. “She wants you to get out of the underground. She doesn’t want you to become a murderer, Eren. Reece isn’t worth your time.”

            “If you think I can live with myself with him still alive, then you’re wrong.” I slipped out of bed, walking over to the only window in his room. I looked out at the darkness. “I have no other family. I have no where else to go.”

            “Even alone, any place would be better than here.”

            “It’s my life. Let me do with it as I please. I won’t keep running. If one day I do leave here, I want to live in peace. That’s not an option as of right now. The police won’t believe me, and you know it. My fingerprints are all over that pocketknife.”

            He lay back down, putting his arm over his eyes. “Did you mean what you said before?”

            “Every word of it.”

            “Not what you said just now, but…earlier.” His voice had grown soft, wary.

            I gazed at him over my shoulder. “You mean what I told you before we fell asleep?” He gave a quick nod of his head. “Yes. Of course I meant it. I wouldn’t have said it otherwise.”

            Silence filled the room like some physical being, but I didn’t feel uncomfortable or embarrassed. There were other pressing matters on my mind. With the help of Auruo and Erd, I would be able to learn new fighting techniques. I also had to learn how to scale buildings with ease. There were so many things to do before I could face Reece again.

            “Eren?”

            “Hmm?” I felt his arms wrap around my waist as he came to stand behind me.

            “Say it again.”

            I opened my mouth to ask him why, but thought better of it. “I love you, Levi.” Heat rushed to my cheeks after the words left my mouth and I couldn’t bring myself to turn around and face him. Why did he want to hear it again? Did he doubt me? “Levi—”

            “No one…has ever said that to me before.”

            I spun around and he dropped his head. “I love you.”

            “Eren—”

            “I really do,” I said. “I’ve never been in love before, but I’m sure that’s what this is.” He stared up at me, not saying a word. “You don’t have to tell me anything back. I wouldn’t want you to, if you didn’t really feel that way.” I shifted from one foot to another. “U-Um, it’s still early, but I’m going to go make us some tea.”

            I fled to the kitchen, busying myself with the task of heating up water. After I set the kettle down on the stovetop, I grabbed two mugs from the cabinet, putting them down on the counter. I grabbed the box of tea, opening it up to grab two bags. I placed them in the cups, heaving out a sigh.

            How was this possible? How could my body function when my mom was no longer here? I should have been incapable of going about my day like everything in my life was perfectly normal. None of this was normal, and I couldn’t even begin to grasp how it had come to this.

            I felt like I was being held together by fragile threads that could break at any moment. Did I really have it in me to kill Reece? Was I even capable of rising to the top in the underground? Strength alone wouldn’t get me through this. I had to have the trust of Levi’s men, if I was going to get their help. They may entrust their lives to Levi, but that in no way meant that they would put themselves at risk for me.

            “The water’s boiling,” Levi said from behind me. I snapped back to reality, reaching over to pull the kettle off the burning hot stovetop. “What were you thinking about?”

            “Lots of things.”

            “Like?”

            “It’s nothing.” I poured the hot water into the mugs, watching the teabags soak it in. “You’ve lost a lot of people, haven’t you? How do you do it? How do you go on?”

            He walked up to me, taking the kettle from my hand. “It wasn’t easy at first. But the more death I saw, the more familiar it became. I didn’t want to grow immune to it, but in the end, I did. Killing has become second nature to me. Watching someone die is nothing.”

            “So…you feel nothing when you lose someone?”

            “That all depends on who that someone is,” he said. “It wouldn’t be easy to lose Farlan or Isabel. I’ve grown quite fond of Erd, Auruo, and Gunther, too. Still, I’d be able to move on.” I sighed, bracing my hands on the counter, but before I could say anything, he added, “I don’t think I’d recover if I lost you.”

            My eyes widened. “…Why? You’ve known the others for much longer than me.”

            He pressed a kiss to the nape of my neck. “I’m not in love with them.”

            I whirled around. “Y-You’re in love with me?!”

            He smirked. “Bring me my tea.”

            Though I knew that nothing would be the same from here on out, I felt like I could handle what life had to throw at me if Levi were at my side. Being with him made me feel assured that I would be able to move forward, and right now, that was what I needed the most.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be honest, I really loved this chapter. Levi is so sweet. I just want to cuddle him. 
> 
> As always, thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving me kudos. You guys are da best! <3


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it's the 14th and this is the 14th chapter, and it's Valentine's Day. OOOHHHH, Valentine's Day Special! I had to make this fluffy. I simply couldn't resist! Hopefully you guys will enjoy this, because I sure enjoyed writing it.
> 
> Go on and read! :D

Scaling buildings was a lot harder than it looked. My palms had been scraped and bruised beyond recognition. The same went for my elbows and knees. Every muscle in my body was screaming in protest as I forced myself to run down narrow alleyways, searching for something I could climb onto, or use as a foothold, because I had to be able to get onto rooftops within a moment’s notice.

            Erd ran behind me, as silent as a stalking predator. I couldn’t hear or see him, which only served to make me anxious. This was how it would be if I had someone chasing after me, except when that happened, I wouldn’t know about it until they made their move to attack.

            Scanning my surroundings, I spotted a broken window that could serve as a means for me to climb up to the second floor. As I approached it, I heard something behind me, and I knew Erd was closing in. I had to hurry. If he caught me while he was holding back, then Levi would never let me go on this upcoming mission. I had to prove to him that I was capable of doing this. I wanted that first-hand experience.

            Ignoring the telltale sound of rushing footsteps behind me, I ran over to the window, stepping up onto the windowsill. There was a rusty ladder welded to the side of the building above me. If I could reach it, I would be able to climb up to the rooftop. The only problem was if it would be stable enough to hold my weight. It looked old.

            “Shit,” I hissed, knowing that I didn’t have time to dawdle around. I had to act. So I reached up, my fingertips barely grazing the bottom step. “Come on.” I stood up on my tiptoes, giving myself enough leverage to grasp onto the step. I pulled myself up without hesitation, listening to the loud creak of the ladder as it bore my weight.

            I didn’t allow myself time to think about the ladder crashing down. I focused all my energy on climbing; keeping my eyes pinned on the ledge of the building. Once I was on the rooftop, I would be able to jump from building to building. Levi had told me that it would take a while to get used to the impact of landing, but that’s why I was doing this training.

            I would train until I could stand by him as an equal.

            When I reached the top of the ladder, I suddenly felt a hand wrap around my ankle. I looked down to see Erd, who gave my leg a forceful tug, causing me to instinctively tighten my grip.

            “If I were one of Reece’s men,” Erd said, “you would show no mercy.”

            I nodded once before twisting my foot out of his grasp to slam it down onto his fingers. He showed no sign of pain and gave me no time to recover my footing.

            “I would have already yanked you down by now,” he muttered.

            I clenched my teeth, forcefully smashing my foot against his chest. He slipped down, but caught himself before falling to the ground below. I didn’t wait for him to recover, climbing up and over the ledge of the building. I sprung forward, sprinting toward the next rooftop. There was a good-sized gap between the buildings, but I was sure I could clear it.

            When I reached the edge of the rooftop, I flung myself forward, bracing myself for landing, but nothing could prepare me for the shock of pain that reverberated through my ankles the moment my feet made contact with the cement. I cursed aloud, but kept on running, ignoring the throb in my feet. If I was going to survive in the underground, these were things that I was going to have to do on a regular basis. I didn’t have time to be fretting over pain.

            Since we were only doing this for training, I was still in Levi’s territory, but he had marked off certain areas that were now considered “red zones”. Meaning that I was to pretend that I was no longer in his jurisdiction and in an enemy’s terrain. I wasn’t too far from where he had told me was the safe zone. If I could make it there without Erd catching me again, I was sure I could convince Levi that I was ready to go on this upcoming mission.

            “Surprise.” That was the last word I heard before I felt an arm slam against my chest, knocking me backward with such force that all the air left my lungs as my back made contact with the rooftop. “There’s always going to be more than one person chasing you, moron.”

            I looked up to see Auruo standing over me. “Thanks for that.” I rubbed at my chest, pretending to be absorbed in the task. When he turned his head away from me, smiling smugly, I whipped my foot forward, kicking his feet out from under him. “Take that, you smug bastard.” Before he could react, I was up and running, taking no time at all to hop to another rooftop.

            My knees buckled under the weight of my body, but I pushed myself up to a stand within seconds. My legs throbbed in response, but I could cope with that. Pain wasn’t anything to me. It was something I had learned to handle. The only negative side effect was what pain caused: lagging. Though I was running as fast as I could, it wasn’t nearly fast enough anymore.

            “Fuck,” I mumbled, realizing that Auruo could catch up to me easily. But he was never given the chance to, because before I knew what was happening, I was on my back, a knife pressed against the jugular vein in my neck.

            “You’re dead,” Levi said, pinning me down with ease. “As I said earlier: You’re not ready for the mission. Unlike us, Reece’s men will show no mercy, which means”—he applied pressure to the knife—“you’re dead.”

            I turned my head to the side, feeling the blade slice a thin line in my flesh. “I’ll be ready. It’s in a week.”

            He withdrew his knife, moving back. “A week isn’t enough time. Don’t sit there and try to convince me. I’ve made up my mind. You’ll stay back with Isabel.”

            “Hey, wait a minute.” I sat up, but he was already on his feet. “I can handle this.”

            “No, you can’t.” He walked toward the edge of the building. “You failed on more than one occasion today. Erd had the chance to pull you off the ladder, and if you were an enemy, Auruo would have done more than just knock you to the ground.”

            I knew what he was saying was the truth, but it still angered me. More than anything, though, I was pissed off at myself. I had come down to the underground believing I could be Levi’s equal in no time. Now I knew it wouldn’t be that easy. It had taken Levi years to rise to the top.

            “Fine,” I said, rolling over so I could push myself up onto my hands and knees. “I’ll stay behind, but I want to keep training. I _will_ get better. I won’t stop until I do.”

            Standing up, my legs wobbled beneath me. Who knew that being a thug in the underground required a tiptop shape physique? This lifestyle was nothing like how movies depicted it. In a lot of scenarios, it was hand-to-hand combat, and if we had to use force, we settled for knives. I wondered if Levi had ever used a gun as a weapon.

            When I turned around, I was surprised to see Levi standing right in front of me. He reached up to brush my neck, his eyebrows drawing together when his fingertips grazed the cut he had just given me.

            “Doesn’t hurt,” I said. “You were trying to prove a point.”

            “I know I was, but you weren’t supposed to turn your head to the side, you idiot.”

            I grinned. “Are you mad that you hurt me?”

            His eyes moved up to meet mine and I drank in the sight of him. Today he wore a black jacket and dark-blue jeans that left nothing to the imagination. I stepped closer to him, taking hold of the two white drawstrings of his jacket. “Auruo and Erd will be here soon.”

            “Your point?” I said, moving my hands up to take purchase of the fabric to pull him closer to me.

            “Weakling!” Auruo called from the other rooftop, and Levi took several steps back. “It’ll take a miracle to make you thug worthy!”

            I laughed. “I knocked you on your ass!”

            “I let you!” he shouted back.

            I watched him jump over to the rooftop I was on, seeming almost graceful in his movements. For being an obnoxious fuck, he actually made a pretty good thug, which annoyed me. As of right now, he was Levi’s best man. And what was I?

            Chopped liver.

            When Erd met up with us, we made our way back to Levi’s house. My entire body felt like minced meat, but it was nothing in comparison to my wounded pride. This was good, though. I was finally acknowledging the fact that none of this was going to be easy. But in the end, when I got my revenge, all of this training would be worth it, because Reece would be dead.

            Once we were inside the house, I went straight to the washroom, pulling off my T-shirt in the process. After I washed up, and changed into clean clothes, I went into the kitchen, where Farlan was reading a book to Isabel.

            “You look better,” I said, glancing at Isabel’s rosy cheeks and healthy complexion. For a while, she had been deathly pale. Levi and Farlan hadn’t taken their eyes off her for a second, but now that she was on her way to being back to normal, both of them had relaxed a little.

            “I _feel_ better.” She smiled wide. “Hanji stopped by earlier and gave me some vitamins. She also dropped off some food, so we’ll be eating well tonight. What about you? How was training?”

            I sat down in a seat opposite hers. “I need improvement. Levi said he wouldn’t let me go on this upcoming mission.”

            At that, Farlan’s eyes snapped over to my face. “I think he should let you go. You could really help.”

            “But he said I wasn’t ready,” I told him. “I’d probably just get in the way.”

            “I’m not talking about you fighting, Eren. The owner of the place we’re going to be sneaking into has a daughter around your age. The night of our raid is the night of some grand ball he’s holding. If you were to keep her distracted, things could go a lot more smoothly for us. In fact—OW!” Isabel thrust her elbow against his arm again. “What was that for?”

            She glared at him. “You know what that was for. Don’t play dumb.”

            He rubbed at his arm. “Don’t you agree with me, though?”

            “I never said I didn’t,” she muttered. “But if Big Bro finds out that you told Eren about this, there’s going to be trouble. Just shut up already.”

            Farlan sighed, pushing back in his seat. “Fine, but I think Eren has every right to know.”

            “I’m right here,” I said, frustrated. “What is Levi keeping from me?”

            Before he could give me an answer, Levi walked into the house. He didn’t look at any of us as he strode to his room, and I had to wonder if he had heard our conversation. I stood up in a hurry, tipping over the chair. I listened to it clatter to the floor behind me, but I was already opening the door to Levi’s room.

            He stood near his bed, slipping out of his jacket. He didn’t pay any attention to me as I came closer to him.

            “What are you hiding from me?” I asked.

            He chose to ignore me, hanging up his jacket before walking to the bed. He sat down on the edge, acting casual as he removed his shoes. Was he just going to sit there and ignore me the whole night? Why was it so hard for him to let me in on this?

            “If I can be of any help—”

            “You’ll have nothing to do with this mission,” he said. “That’s final, Eren.”

            “I don’t understand. If I can help you guys, why won’t you let me? Farlan said I could be used to distract that girl. That’s a simple task. Do you think I can’t even handle something that small?”

            “We’re not discussing this.”

            I clenched my hands into fists, glaring daggers at him. “Stop treating me like I’m some useless child. How am I ever going to amount to anything down here, if you’re going to keep holding me back?”

            He stayed silent, looking up at me with no expression on his face. It made me want to punch him. He would never see me as anything other than some kid. Even if I managed to make something out of myself, I doubted he would consider me his equal. And why was I even getting worked up over this? I wasn’t down here to prove myself to him. I was here for one purpose, and one purpose only: Kill Reece.

            I turned on my heel, needing to get away, but I had barely taken a step when I felt his arm wrap around my waist. He pulled me back toward him, throwing me down onto the bed. When he climbed on top of me, I stared up at him, caught between confusion and being turned on by how strong he was.

            “What are you doing?” I asked, hoping he didn’t notice the strain in my voice.

            “You really want to know why I don’t want you to help with this mission?” He leaned down, pressing his lips to my ear to whisper: “I don’t want anyone else to touch you.”

            I knew that was an illogical way for him to think, but I couldn’t form words to argue with him. My brain had clocked out and all I could do was gape at him as he lowered himself over me. I swallowed hard, my eyes shutting of their own accord when he pressed open-mouthed kisses along my jawline. I trembled beneath his touch, giving away just how much he could affect me with simple kisses.

            “You’re mine,” he whispered against my neck, causing me to shiver.

            “Everyone’s out there.” I tried to gather my thoughts, but lost to the arousal coursing through my body when he ground his hips against mine, his erection rubbing against mine through the fabric of our jeans.

            I bit down on my bottom lip, my breath coming out in harsh pants as he continued to grind against me. “Levi,” I choked out. “Lev—” A deep groan interrupted me and I threw my arm over my face in hopes of muffling the sound.

            He grabbed my hips, using his hold on them to flip me around onto my stomach. My eyes widened when I felt his hard cock press against my ass and I inhaled deeply through my teeth, my head falling forward onto the mattress.

            Though he had given me plenty of hand jobs, we hadn’t gone beyond that. He had insisted on taking things slow, which I was okay with. But now, with him on top of me, I couldn’t help but feel like I wanted to take it to the next step. Which was what exactly? My lack of knowledge on this particular subject was beginning to frustrate me. If I wanted to take this up a notch, then I needed to take initiative, which would require me to know what to do from here.

            While I thought this out, Levi slipped his hand beneath me, pushing my shirt up to expose my chest and stomach. He ran his fingers over my abdomen, lingering near the waistband of my jeans. I lifted my head to look at him, but all his attention was on my body. He watched as my back dipped under his touch, an expression of desperation settling on his face.

            Fuck this. I may not know what to do, but there was one thing I did know: I wanted him. I wanted him so bad it hurt.

            I turned onto my back, wrapping my legs around his waist before he could take over again. I could feel the warmth of the blush that spread across my cheeks to the tips of my ears, but I wasn’t about to let that stop me. Pushing my uncertainty aside, I thrust my hips up, unable to hold back the moan that spilled from my mouth.

            “Eren,” Levi said, his voice rough with arousal. “Don’t start things you’re not ready for.”

            “I’m not the one that started it.”

            He grabbed my wrists with one of his hands, placing them above my head. “You’re not ready.”

            “You don’t think I’m ready for anything.”

            “Oh?” He raised an eyebrow, releasing my hands. He placed his knees on either side of my waist, leaning back to undo my belt. “I never said that.”

            I watched him with rapt attention, my breath catching in my throat when he slid the zipper of my jeans down. “What are you going to do?”

            Instead of answering me, he smirked while moving down my body. When his lips made contact with my lower abdomen, I grabbed handfuls of the sheet beneath me. I couldn’t focus on anything but how his mouth was moving lower and lower…

            I squirmed under his stare as he slipped off my pants and boxers, grabbing the base of my cock. My thoughts were racing inside my head, but all of them vanished the second I felt the tip of his tongue on my skin. My hips jerked up, but he held them down as he lazily sucked on the head. A part of me wanted to push him away, while the other part wanted to shove his head down.

            He licked a trail from the tip, to the base, driving me crazy with each passing second. There was no way I would last. Even though he had just begun, the sight of his mouth on my dick was pushing me closer to my limit. It didn’t help that he was keeping eye contact with me, those gray irises smoldering with longing as they gazed into mine.

            There was too much space between us for my liking, so I sat up, sliding my fingers into his hair. He took me into his mouth and I bit down on the lower part of my thumb, willing the noises that were leaving me to stop. Everyone would hear. Isabel would never shut up about it, but…it felt so good. There was no way for me to contain the moans that were rising in my throat.

            “L-Levi…I’m close.” My fingers tightened reflexively, pulling his hair, making him moan against my cock. Tremors of pleasure rolled through my entire being as I hunched forward, dragging my nails up his back. “Not much longer,” I repeated, warning him, but he seemed to take my words as a challenge, gazing up at me with those eyes that made me weak. He moaned around me again, stroking me with his lips, tongue, and fingers.

            My orgasm overtook me so quickly, I couldn’t have warned him again even if I tried. The strength of it caused me to shout out and I shook against him as he kept sucking, swallowing everything I had to give him. When he didn’t slow down, I grabbed his shoulders, giving him a little push; surprised my limbs were even responding. I felt boneless.

            Levi sat up, keeping his eyes on me, claiming me. “Now you can be a part of the mission.” He slid off the bed and went to stand by the window.

            “What?” What did he mean by that?

            He looked at me over his shoulder. “Clean yourself up. We have things to do.” He turned to walk to the door, ready to leave me with all these questions.

            “Wait,” I stammered, climbing off the bed awkwardly. “Why did you have to do”—I blushed, dropping my eyes—“that in order for me to go?”

            “Don’t ask questions, kid. Just get your pants back on and meet me in the washroom.” He left the room and I stared after him, wondering what that had been all about.

            Confused, I grabbed a few tissues from the bedside table, wiping myself up. When I was through, I slid my boxers and jeans back on, still trying to figure out what Levi had meant by what he had said. Then it hit me. Was he…insecure? He had told me that he didn’t want anyone else to touch me, and if I went on this mission, I would be distracting that girl.

            How in the world did he think I was going to distract her? Or did he think that I would be attracted to her? I shook my head. He was out of his mind. Then again, I was the first person that had ever loved him—or at least the first person to have said it aloud. There had to be others that felt something for him. Right?

            The thought of Levi feeling lonely and abandoned down here made me want to reassure him that no one else would do. It had to be him. He kept saying that I was his, but in turn, that made him mine.

            I strode out of the room, ignoring the questioning glares I received from both Farlan and Isabel, who were still sitting at the dining table. Once I made it passed them, I picked up my pace, running into the washroom. Levi was standing in front of the spigot, splashing water onto his face.

            “I’m in love with you,” I said. “Do you even know what that means for me?” He turned his head to look at me and I went on. “It means no one else will do. I only want you. It’s always been you…since the day I saved Isabel.”

            He stood completely still, revealing nothing. Then, suddenly, he rushed over to me, claiming my lips. I let him kiss me into oblivion, not even caring that someone could walk in at any moment.

            “Love you,” I whispered in the seconds our lips weren’t connected. “So much. You’re mine, too.”

            He smiled against my lips. “That’s right. I’m yours.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whispers, "Premature ejaculator." Ok, ok. Before you guys think this, it was Eren's first blow job. I had to be realistic, and I thought it was insanely cute. I swear I was smiling the whole time I was writing this chapter. These two will be the death of me, because they're so damn cute together. It wounds my soul in the best of ways. I mean, come on, Levi being a cute, insecure baby… UGH, too adorable! 
> 
> As alwaaaays, my lovelies, thanks for reading, commenting, and subscribing. I tried to reply to everyone's comments last chapter, because I actually had a day off this week. Just remember, even if I don't respond, I do read every comment and they are very much appreciated. ❤


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah, I'm sorry that this took a while for me to update. I've been having an awful week, and had little to no time to write. It's a miracle in itself that I managed to finish this chapter by tonight, but I do hope you guys enjoy it. It's these kinds of chapters that make me want to upload 2 chapters at a time, because not much happens in this. But next chapter will be very fun to write, because it's the night of their mission. :)
> 
> So, go on and read.

Two days before the mission, Levi sat me down at the dining table to go over important information that I needed to know if I was going to be involved in all this. And since I had made up my mind to go, he wasn’t cutting any corners. He wanted to make sure that I knew exactly what to do and where to go if any trouble should occur. But I had confidence that he would get us through the night smoothly.

            As he took a seat next to me, he set a piece of paper down on the table, tapping it with his finger. “That’s the layout of the mansion.”

            I gazed at it, taking note of the many rooms. “Wow, it’s big.”

            “Yes. That’s why I want you to study this until you memorize it. If anyone catches onto us, you’re going to have to be able to get out of there quick. You won’t have any weapons on you except for a knife. That won’t stand up against guns.”

            I gave him a sideways glance. “I’ll be fine.”

            “Will you?” He looked at me for a long while before he grasped my chin in his hand. “There are a lot of things that can go wrong. If you sense something bad is going to happen, I want you to get out of there. Don’t stick around to find me. I can take care of myself.”

            “I wouldn’t leave you.”

            He tightened his grip on my chin. “Moron. I’m capable of handling my own. You do as I say, or you won’t be going. You have to follow my orders. I am your superior, after all.”

            I sighed. “Fine. The same goes for you, then.”

            “You can’t give me orders, Eren,” he said.

            “So you can tell me to leave you, but you won’t leave me?”

            “Exactly.” He pushed his seat back, standing up in one fluid movement. “If I were to be honest with you, I’d tell you that this mission is going to be very dangerous. The man that I’m after knows how I work. He used to live in the underground until he was lucky enough to land himself some good money. Now he’s a millionaire who wants nothing to do with the underground, but he’s the only one that can help us.”

            Grabbing the sleeve of Levi’s shirt, I urged him to sit back down. “Help us with what?”

            After he reclaimed his seat, he gazed off into the distance. “Reece is becoming powerful. He’s not following the rules of the underground anymore. If he were, you wouldn’t be down here, and your mother wouldn’t be dead. If he keeps going on like this… I won’t be able to guarantee the safety of anyone.”

            “And what can this man you’re after do?”

            “Provide me with the weapons I need in order to take over Reece’s territory,” he said. “I won’t be able to do it otherwise. He’s gathered a lot more men, men that are willing to lay down their lives for him. I don’t know what type of bullshit he’s feeding them, but I know they will kill anyone who poses a threat to him.”

            I picked up the paper, analyzing it. “Why is Reece so interested in me?”

            He breathed out, closing his eyes. “He already told you why when he showed up in your backyard.”

            I thought back to that time, remembering the way he had held a knife to my mom’s throat. He had gone out of his way to get me out of Trost. “He said that I would become your weakness.”

            “There’s no ‘becoming my weakness’, kid. You’ve already managed that without even trying.”

            “I don’t want to be the reason that he can gain an upper hand on you, Levi. I don’t want to be your weakness.”

            He opened his eyes to peer at me. “That doesn’t matter. He already knows that I’d sacrifice my life for yours. He also knows that if anything were to happen to you, I wouldn’t be able to maintain my rank as leader. He’s after you for one purpose: to bring me down. Without me in the way, he’ll be able to take over the underground, and everyone in it.”

            I slammed my fist down on the table. “I won’t let him! I’m not some weakling he can just come and snatch up. I won’t be some damsel in distress that you’ll have to go and rescue. If that’s what he thinks, then I’ll prove him wrong.” I gritted my teeth, angry, but it flickered away when I remembered what Levi had just said. “Wait, what did you mean when you said you won’t be able to maintain your rank as leader if anything were to happen to me?”

            “Is that really important?”

            “Yes.”

            He sighed. “I would go after him, Eren. I would get to him at all costs; kill anyone who would dare to get in my way. Many of my men would follow after me and would die in doing so. How could I be a leader after something like that?”

            I shook my head. “That’s not what I would want. I’d want you to get out of here and take as many of your men with you.”

            “You act as though I would be thinking rationally.” He turned his head to the side, making it a point to look at anything but me. “I wouldn’t be.”

            I stared at him for a number of seconds before I stood up. “I’m meeting Erd and Auruo over at that abandoned factory by the market in fifteen minutes. I’m going to be training for the better part of the day, but should be back before nightfall. I’ll study the layout of the mansion then.”

            “Eren.” He grabbed my hand, keeping me in place. “I want to leave this place as much as you do, but if I’m going anywhere, I’m taking you with me.”

            “In the end, that may not be possible. We don’t know what will happen from here on out. But if something _were_ to happen to me, I’d want you to leave the underground. I don’t want you to die down here for me.”

            “I know.”

            From the moment I saw him, I knew that my life would change, but I never thought that I would have so many conflicting feelings for him. We couldn’t leave the underground together. As much as I wanted to, we had things to take care of before that could happen—things that could leave us dead.

            Would we ever get out of here?

            I wanted to think that I had enough strength and will power to avenge my mom’s death, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that Levi could break my resolve. Right now, he wasn’t really trying to. He had stuff to deal with just like I did. But once he was finished taking care of everything, would he try to convince me to leave the underground with him? Would I be able to stay back and complete what I was down here to do?

            “Eren!” Isabel called as she ran out of her room, snapping me out of my reverie. When she spotted me, she sagged in relief. “Good. I woke up in time.”

            “For what?” I asked.

            “To come with you. Farlan and Levi are going to be discussing boring stuff all day. I don’t want to stay here with them. I want to watch you train. So”—she walked up to me and looped her arm through mine—“let’s go. I’ll make Erd get us some breakfast.” She dragged me out of the house, seeming in a hurry.

            When we were far enough away from the house, she dropped my arm, going to walk ahead of me. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know what. Since the night of my mom’s death, she had been acting off. Farlan had told me that she blamed herself for what had happened that night, but it wasn’t her fault. I had assured her of that many times.

            I picked up my pace to catch up to her, smiling when I did.

            “Don’t,” she said.

            “Don’t what?”

            “Don’t go on this mission, Eren. I know you want to help, but Big Bro can manage without you. He’d probably be better off that way. With you going, he’ll be distracted and—”

            “Isabel,” I said, cutting her off. “What’s really going on here? Normally you wouldn’t let me pass up a chance like this.”

            She stopped midstride, turning to face me. “I don’t want you to die, Eren. I don’t want you to end up like so many of Levi’s men. I want you to get out of here and live out a normal life. If you wouldn’t have saved me that day, then you wouldn’t be in this mess. Your mom is dead because—”

            “Of Reece,” I finished. “Everything is Reece’s fault, and that’s why I’m going to kill him.”

            “I’m going to be frank with you. The probability of you getting away with killing Reece is slim to none. He has too many men behind him now. I don’t even know if this upcoming mission will prove to be a success.”

            “It will be.”

            She grasped my shoulders, taking me by surprise. “You’re a fool! You’ve been one from the very beginning. I should have died that day. I deserved it. I was being an idiot and went onto Reece’s territory. It should have ended with me, but no, Farlan almost died, Big Bro almost died, and your mom _did die._ ” She put her hands over her face, trembling. “I’m so sorry. It should have been me. No one else should have been hurt.”

            “Hey.” I stepped up to her, pulling her into my arms. “You didn’t ask me to save you. I wanted to, and I don’t regret it either. We’ve all taken a course of action that has led us here, but now all we can do is move forward.”

            She tilted her head up to look at me. “But you’re living for the wrong reason.”

            “What?”

            “You’re living for revenge.”

            “How is me living to avenge my mom's death wrong?”

            Before she could respond to my question, Auruo came out of nowhere, slapping me on the shoulder hard enough to knock me off balance. I regained my footing, glaring at him over my shoulder.

            “You’re late,” he declared in a booming voice. “Tch. Making me come and look for you. Hurry it up. We don’t have all day to be waiting for you.”

            The rest of the morning was spent practicing my hand-to-hand combat in the abandoned factory. I was good at blocking and catching them off guard, but when it came to strength, they both had me beat. Of course they were older than me, but I still felt like I was greatly lacking in that department. If I was going to fix that, then I needed to train every day to become stronger.

            By the time mid afternoon came around, I felt like my arms and legs were made out of spaghetti noodles. Every muscle in my body was burning with the strain of me overworking them, but that didn’t stop me from punching Auruo in the gut. I smiled at him triumphantly, but it was short lived, because he whipped around, kicking me hard in my side.

            “Dammit,” I muttered, collapsing to the ground. I pushed myself up onto my hands and knees, breathing raggedly. I didn’t know how long I would be able to keep this up for. It was a miracle that I could even stand up without falling over.

            “Giving up so soon?” Auruo taunted me once I was back on my feet.

            “You wish.” I smirked at him, surprised that my legs were still able to hold up my weight. “Don’t be mad that I’m a lot stronger than I look.”

            He laughed. “That’s not much of an accomplishment. You look like a wimp.”

            “Ow. My pride is wounded.”

            “Your pride won’t be the only thing wounded once I’m through with you.” He charged at me and I barely had enough time to lift up my arms to block the kick that he aimed at my neck. I skidded backward from the impact, but wasn’t given enough time to recuperate before he came crashing into me, shoving me to the floor using all his weight. “Now do you give up?”

            I took a deep breath in, which turned into a coughing fit. “You…bastard.”

            Erd came walking up to where I lay, holding out his hand to me. He helped me up, steadying me when I swayed on my feet. “I think that’s enough for one day. As it is, Levi won’t be very happy with the bruises we left on your face.”

            “I’m fine,” I said, though I could feel the swell in my left cheek.

            “The swelling in your face should go down by tomorrow morning. It won’t matter too much if it’s still noticeable by Saturday. After all, you’ll be attending a masquerade ball, and the mask that was bought for you covers your entire face.”

            Isabel hopped down from the pile of cinder blocks she had been sitting on since this morning. She dusted off her behind, making a face while doing it. “The mask won’t cover your eyes. If anything, that’s something you should be concerned about.”

            Erd suddenly looked contemplative. “That’s true. You have a unique eye color that someone could identify you by. I’ll have a talk with Levi, see if we can have Hanji buy you some contacts.”

            “Is that necessary?” I asked.

            Auruo came striding up to me, slamming his hand down on my shoulder. “Don’t question what’s necessary or not.”

            I shrugged off his hand. “I’m heading back. Are you coming with me Isabel?”

            She shook her head. “I have to drop by the market to pick up some food for dinner. Farlan is going to meet me there soon.”

            “I’ll stay with her in the meantime,” Erd said, setting my mind at ease. Leaving Isabel alone was never a good idea. She had a knack for getting herself into trouble, and trouble was the last thing we needed.

            “Ok.” I waved good-bye to them, hurrying out of the factory. Since my legs felt like jelly, I couldn’t go too fast. It took me longer than I wanted to reach Levi’s house, but all the excitement I felt died away when I saw that he wasn’t even home. 

            At the sight of the empty living room, all I could do was sag to the floor, laying out spread eagle. I didn’t have enough energy to go to the washroom to take a shower, which meant that I couldn’t go lie down on Levi’s bed. Training all day had caused me to work up a sweat, and if he found out that I was in his room while I was dirty, he would never let me hear the end of it. So, I opted to take a nap right there on the floor.

            I don’t know how long I had been sleeping for when I woke up to the sound of chatter coming from the kitchen area. I lifted my head up, seeing Farlan and Isabel talking amongst themselves at the dining table. Levi was standing in front of the stove, cooking up something that smelt incredible.

            “Go get cleaned up,” Levi said, turning his head to look at me. “I won’t let you eat looking like that.”

            I sat up, wincing at the soreness of my limbs. “How did you know I was awake?”

            He grinned. “Your snoring stopped.”

            Isabel snorted out laughter at that. “That’s true.”

            “I don’t snore,” I muttered, getting to my feet. “And if I did, it’s only because I was exhausted.”

            Levi’s grin turned into a small smile and my stomach did a little flip-flop at the sight. “Whatever you say. Now go take a shower. You reek of sweat.”

            “Did you take the time to stop and smell me?” I asked, returning his smile.

            “No. You just stink that bad. In fact, I can smell you from here.”

            I scoffed. “Liar.”

            He turned back around, using a spatula to stir around the contents in the frying pan. “Get going. The food is almost done.”

            I walked out to the washroom, doing my best to hurry up. After I ate, I was going to look over the layout of the mansion, and then I was heading to bed. Tomorrow I had training with Erd and Auruo once again, though they had already told me that it wouldn’t be as gruesome as it had been for the last couple of days. They wanted me to be able to walk properly this Saturday for the mission.

            Though I was now officially a part of it, I still hadn’t been told any details. I didn’t even know the name of the girl I was going to be distracting. It didn’t make much sense to me. Shouldn’t I be let in on that? Or was Levi keeping it from me so that when I approached her, my interest would seem more realistic? That was probably the case. He knew I was an awful liar.

            Once I had showered, I returned to the kitchen and took a seat next to Isabel, who was already munching on some fried rice and vegetables. She pushed a plate in front of me, smiling passed a mouthful of food. I wrinkled my nose at her playfully, grinning when she stuck her tongue out at me.

            “How was today?” Levi asked. “You have a bruise on your cheek. Did Auruo do that?”

            He knew Auruo did that. Erd wouldn’t hit me in the face.

            “Yep,” I said, picking up my fork. “It went well. Tomorrow Gunther is going to teach me how to attack someone with a knife.”

            “Take that seriously. This Saturday all you’ll have is a knife.”

            I scooped up some rice, bringing it to my mouth. “I take all of this seriously.”

            “He did pretty good today,” Isabel said, patting me on the shoulder. “He managed to get back on his feet until the very end. He’s a lot stronger than most. I think he’ll do good on this mission.” She smiled, but I could see the worry in her eyes. She wasn’t sure how everything would turn out, but neither was I. Still, I had confidence in Levi’s abilities, and I knew I would do everything within my power to complete my task without arousing suspicion.

            “What’s his name?” I asked.

            Levi’s eyes flicked over to me. “Whose?”

            “The guy who owns the mansion. I want to know his name.”

            “Erwin Smith.”

            “Erwin,” I repeated. “And did he used to be one of your men?”

            Farlan clenched his hand, but didn’t say a word. Isabel also got quiet at the sound of his name, the muscle in her jaw twitching as she clenched her teeth.

            “No,” Levi said. “He was our leader, and I was his second in command. We were good friends back then. I trusted him with my life. But as I told you before, he came into good money and left the underground. He didn’t care about the safety of his men, so I had to step up.”

            I set my fork down on the plate, looking up at him. “Do you think he’ll help you?”

            “I’m not sure. I never thought he would leave like that, but he did. So do I honestly believe that he’ll risk his life to help us? No, I don’t. But I haven’t been left with any other choice. If I have to threaten him, then I will. I don’t want it to have to come to that, and I will avoid it until he gives me no other options.”

            Levi hadn’t been lying when he said that this mission would be dangerous. This man, Erwin Smith, had once been his leader, which could only mean that he was strong. It also meant that he wasn’t someone that would be unprepared. If he had once lived in the underground, then he would always be prepared for an oncoming attack. Would he be able to see this coming from a mile away?

            “Would he kill you?” I asked.

            “Without hesitation,” Levi responded. He stood up, picking up his empty plate and mug. I watched him as he strode to the kitchen sink, turning on the water to wash the dishes he had used.

            Without hesitation…

            Those were the last words that I had wanted to hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Erwin Smith. I know a lot of people who read my last fic, Our Cryptic Love, think I hate him, but in all honesty, I really don't. I didn't have any feelings towards him when I read the manga. He was just…there. xD Then again, I was totally focused on Eren, so maybe that's why he didn't stick out for me. That changed once I made up an IG account, because you get in touch with more characters through people who love and appreciate them. So, yes, I don't hate Mr. Eyebrows, ok? 
> 
> I'm actually looking forward to the next two chapters. They are going to be fun.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading and commenting. I love thee! ❤


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Masquerade Ball Mission Part 1?? 
> 
> Okay, this chapter was getting too long to write the whole mission, so yes, this is only the first part. I'm sorry! I really wanted to update with the whole damn thing, because I have it all figured out, but I guess that's not going to happen. But don't fret, because I will try to update soon. :D
> 
> So go on and read.

The night of the ball, I sat on Levi’s bed in a black tuxedo that was about the most uncomfortable thing I had ever worn. It was snug in all the wrong places and Isabel had tied the bowtie incredibly tight. I felt like an idiot, but there was nothing I could do about it. This was what I had to wear if I was going to look the part I would be playing. Still, I wished that the mask wasn’t necessary.

            For what felt like the twentieth time in a row, Isabel readjusted the mask on my face, peering at me through the two holes my eyes looked out of. She shook her head, startling me when she smacked the side of mine.

            “Hey,” I mumbled, rubbing the spot she had hit. “What was that for?”

            “That’s for being highly attractive. I’m restraining myself as I speak. If you weren’t Big Bro’s boyfriend, I swear I’d have my way with you.”

            I barked out a laugh. “No you wouldn’t. You like Farlan.”

            She glared at me. “Well, he’s never going to return my feelings and a girl has needs, Eren.”

            “Don’t give up,” I said, standing up. I walked over to the oval mirror hanging to the side of Levi’s bed to look at myself. My hair was pushed back and the white mask hid my entire face except for my eyes, which were now a vibrant gold. Hanji had bought the most expensive contacts she could get her hands on, insisting that gold was the most reasonable choice. “Wow. I look stupid.”

            “Are you kidding me?” Isabel came waltzing over to where I stood, examining my reflection. “If you and Big Bro make it through the night, he will have your legs spread open faster than you will even be able to say the word ‘sex’.”

            I blushed crimson, whirling around to stare at her wide-eyed. “No he won’t.”

            She smirked, putting her hand on her hip. “Oh, yes he will. Believe me. With how you look right now, I wouldn’t be surprised if Erwin himself comes barking up your tree trunk, if you know what I mean.” She smirked at me, wiggling her eyebrows in a suggestive way.

            “Shut up! That’s not going to happen. And even if it did, I wouldn’t let anyone ‘bark up my tree trunk’.”

            She raised an eyebrow. “Is that so? So you’re saying that you wouldn’t let Levi have a little taste?”

            I flushed so hard it hurt. God, could any more blood rush to my face? “Will you be quiet? Everyone is out there and you’re practically shouting.”

            “Oh, I see how it is,” she said, grinning from ear to ear. “You _would_ let Big Bro get a sample of that. Should I buy earplugs while you’re out? Because he’s going to have you screaming so loud—”

            I clamped my hand over her mouth, willing her to stop talking. “Shush up! And how would you even know that? Has he…been with a lot of men before?” Was I really about to get jealous an hour before I was going to head to Erwin’s mansion? It wasn’t like anything Levi did before he met me even mattered. That was in the past. So why did the thought of him being with anyone else make my insides twist uncomfortably?

            “No,” Isabel said, sounding serious. “He’s attractive as hell, but that type of thing has never been his top priority. Taking care of Farlan and me has always come first. After that, he tries to be the best leader he can be, so no, he hasn’t been with a lot of men before.”

            “Oh.” That was all I could think to say, because the relief I felt was palpable.

            “You’re different from anyone he has ever been with, Eren. He’s never been in love before. He’s just as inexperienced in that department as you are. He wants to make you happy. That’s why he’s going out of his way to put a stop to Reece’s reign of idiocy.”

            I snagged her by the arm. “What?”

            She breathed in, her eyes moving up to my face. “He was putting off confronting Erwin for a long time now. But with Reece after you, he didn’t want to wait any longer.” She put her hands on either side of my head, forcing me to look her in the eyes. “He loves you. If something were to happen to you tonight, he would never forgive himself. So, do us all a favor and don’t go getting ballsy. Do as you’re told, and if any trouble starts up, you better get your ass out of there.”

            “I will,” I promised. “I really love him, too.”

            She smiled proudly. “I know, which is why I approve of you being with him. If you didn’t return his feelings wholeheartedly, I would cut you.”

            I chuckled. “As if I’d let you.”

            We were interrupted when the door swung open, Levi strolling in as though we weren’t just giggling like schoolgirls. He made a motion with his head and Isabel pecked me on the cheek before she rushed out of the room, giving me a meaningful look as she slipped out. I swallowed loudly, pretending to be busy with adjusting my bowtie.

            “We’ll be heading out soon,” Levi told me, slapping my hands away from their fidgeting. “Why are you so squirmy? What were you and Isabel talking about before I came in?”

            “N-Nothing!”

            He glanced up at me. “Then why are you blushing?”

            “I’m not.” I put my hands on my cheeks, meeting the hardness of the mask. “You can’t even see my face.”

            “I know,” he said. “But by the way you reacted, you _are_ blushing. Why?” He stepped closer to me and my heart started to pound frantically in my chest.

            I let out a shaky breath. “No reason in particular.”

            “You’re a terrible liar. I don’t even know why you try.” He pushed the mask up, leaning up to run his lips along mine. I trembled at the contact. “What if I told you that I overhead your conversation?”

            Squeezing my eyes shut, I said in a rush, “Please tell me you’re kidding.”

            “I’m not.”

            Having no response, I covered my face with my hands, hoping to hide the immense embarrassment I was feeling. Why did Isabel have to go and talk about such things out in the open? It didn’t help that she always spoke like she needed to be heard over blaring music. It wouldn’t surprise me if everyone in the house had heard what we had been talking about.

            I groaned at the thought.

            Levi grabbed my wrists, pulling my hands away from my face. I turned my head to avoid making eye contact, but he took hold of my chin. “Hey, look at me.” I sighed, forcing myself to meet his gaze. “I don’t know how tonight is going to turn out. A lot can go wrong. But”—he dropped his eyes, a dusting of pink coloring his cheeks—“if we make it out of this alive, then…maybe…” He let out a long breath, seeming lost for words.

            _He was blushing!_

            He was actually blushing, and he looked so nervous, like he didn’t know what to say or do. My heart could not take this level of cuteness.

            “You want to do…that?” I asked, surprised my face didn’t just burn right off with how much of my blood supply was now located in my cheeks.

            “Only if you’re ready, of course. And, if you want to. There’s no hurry. I can wait. I’d wait forever for you, kid.”

            My legs turned to goo and I literally collapsed back onto the bed. “You’re not allowed to say those kinds of things. My legs are useless. There’s no way I can walk out of here now.”

            He chuckled, crawling over me, but then his expression became serious. “Don’t die tonight.”

            “Like I would go and die after you told me what you just told me.” I looked up at him, cupping his cheeks. “I’m ready, Levi. And how could you even think I wouldn’t want to? You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

            He leaned down to press his lips to mine in a chaste kiss. “I love you.”

            My eyes widened. Though he had confessed his feelings to me in so many words, he had never flat out said, “I love you” before. Hearing those three little words fall from his lips in his amazingly sexy voice did astounding things to my heart’s function.

            I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down to me, needing him closer. “We’re not going to die tonight. We’re going to make it through this. Not just this mission, but also everything else we have to face. We’ll make it out of here.”

            It took him a while to give me any type of response, but when he finally spoke, there was an underlying tone in his voice that made him sound…fearful? “Let’s hope so.” He stood up, readjusting his shirt. He was dressed up just like I was, but he wore a more elegant suit, a cravat tied around his neck the cherry on top. “We need to get going.”

            I nodded, slipping the mask back over my face. “I’m ready.”

            We walked out of his room together and Isabel gave me a sly smile as I tried to seem in complete control of myself. I had to clear my mind. There wasn’t any room for me to make any mistakes from here on out.

            Hanji, who had been talking to Erd while she waited for us, came striding up to me, putting her hands on my shoulders. “Do you remember everything you have to do?”

            “Yes.” We had gone over it plenty of times. I would be attending the ball as Hanji’s guest, since Erwin himself had invited her. Once I was inside, she would point out his daughter to me and I would act as though I was interested in her. My goal for the night was to get her into a room alone so some of Levi’s men could restrain her. She would be the bargaining chip that would hopefully allow us some one on one time with Erwin.

            “Good,” Hanji said. “I’m ready to go. Oh. Before I forget.” She turned around, grabbing something from Auruo. It was a black mask that she tossed over to Levi, who caught it with a look of distaste. “I picked it out myself.”

            “I can tell.” He slipped it on and it covered the top half of his face. “Come on.”

            Everyone except for Isabel walked out of the house. She would be staying behind with only a few of Levi’s men. But seeing as he had checked to make sure Reece wouldn’t see us leaving the underground, she should be all right without the extra protection. Even if Reece decided to invade Levi’s territory while we were gone, Isabel had been given an escape route to take if that should happen in our absence. Still, I didn’t think she would be using it. Reece had other plans in mind. He didn’t want to saunter in here and take over while we were all gone. He wanted us to fight, wanted us to lose against him.

            As we walked down the narrow street that would lead us out of the underground, Levi took hold of my hand, catching me completely off guard. My head whirled around in his direction as disbelief washed over me. Since we had started this relationship, he had kept it well hidden from most of his men, never showing any affection toward me around them. So, the fact that he was holding my hand in front of all of them nearly sent me into shock.

            “I don’t care if they know,” Levi said, answering my unspoken question. “We could die tonight. Why should I keep my feelings for you a secret with that possibility hanging over our heads?” He looked at me with a softness in his eyes that made my heart ache. Then he slipped his free hand beneath the collar of his dress shirt, pulling out the key I had given him months ago. “I’ve always wanted to ask you why you gave this to me.”

            I gazed at the brass key he was holding. “It was supposed to serve as a reminder of me, to show you that I wasn’t going anywhere.”

            “I don’t need this to remember you by.”

            “You say that now,” I said. “Back when I gave it to you, it seemed like you just wanted me out of your life.”

            He slid the key beneath his shirt again. “Don’t be stupid. Even back then I was trying to protect you. But you were a persistent little shit.”

            “I still am.”

            “I know.” He laced his fingers through mine, tightening his grip. “Promise me something.”

            “Anything.”

            “If it comes down to you needing to kill someone to escape, then I want you to do it without hesitation. Can you do that?” He made eye contact with me, a silent plea. “I know it’s a selfish thing for me to ask of you, but, for me, no one’s life is worth as much as yours.”

            “I…” Could I kill someone to save myself? It went against who I was, and the only life I wanted to end was Reece’s, but I knew I would do anything to get back to Levi. “I can do that.”

            At one point in time, he released my hand, moving off to the right without a word. Several of his men followed after him, including Farlan, Auruo, Erd, and Gunther. They wouldn’t be arriving at the ball like Hanji and I would be, so this was where we parted. I kept my eyes fixed on him until he was nothing more than a blur of color in the distance.

            “Why the long face?” Hanji asked, wrapping her arm around my shoulders to direct me toward her car, which was an older red Corvette. “Everything will turn out all right. Levi is a survivor—always has been. He’ll make it through the night.”

            I could only hope that she was right. “How many people won’t, though?”

            “There’s no point in thinking about all that. You won’t be able to change anything by worrying yourself silly. Besides, this is necessary. If it weren’t, Levi wouldn’t put so many of his men’s lives at risk. You know that.”

            “Yeah, I do.”

            I got into the car, trying not to think about everything that could go wrong. Hanji was right: There was no point in dwelling on things that I couldn’t change. All I could do now was carry out the task that had been given to me. If I focused on anything else, I would fail.

            Driving through Trost brought back too many memories of friends that I hadn’t seen in a long time. I wondered what Armin and Mikasa were doing tonight, and if they had any idea what had become of me. If either of them ever found out that I was living in the underground, I wouldn’t put it passed them to try to smuggle me out.

            It was best that they remained in the dark about my whereabouts. There was no reason to bring them into all this.

            “Her name is Krista,” Hanji said.

            I turned in my seat to look at her. “Who?”

            She kept her attention on the road. “Erwin’s daughter. Well, she isn’t really his daughter. Erwin adopted her when he left the underground. She used to live there, as well. He couldn’t bear to leave her behind, but that didn’t stop him from abandoning everyone else.” Her hands tightened around the steering wheel. “He has so much money, yet he won’t even lift a finger to help the people who once depended on his leadership.”

            “Why is that?”

            “Beats me, kiddo,” she murmured. “Maybe having all that money got to his head. But that still doesn’t explain why he left without saying a word to Levi. They were very close.”

            The word _close_ could mean many things.

            “Close as in…?” I trailed off, hoping she’d pick up on what I was suggesting.

            She laughed. “Not like that. You’d be surprised at how much Levi dislikes exchanging bodily fluids, if you catch my drift. You can count how many people he’s slept with on one hand.”

            “Really?”

            “Yeah, really. Does that surprise you?” She glanced at me, grinning. “It does, doesn’t it? That doesn’t surprise me any. He seems very…touchy with you.”

            I was glad that the mask covered my face, because it was unfair how just the mentioning of Levi’s name could have me blushing like the virgin I was. If you would have told me that I would fall head over heels for some famous thug in the underground city, I would have laughed, then punched you in the face. This was so unbelievable. I never knew I was capable of feeling this way for anyone.

            “We’re almost there,” Hanji announced, leaning forward over the steering wheel to gaze out the windshield. “Just be yourself. If you try to be someone your not, Erwin will be able to pick up on it.”

            I nodded. “What does this Krista girl like, anyway?”

            “Oh, don’t worry about that. She’ll do just about anything to get out of the ballroom. She doesn’t like this kind of thing, but Erwin likes showing her off. In all honesty, he tries too damn hard to play the millionaire man he’s become. He doesn’t know how to go about it. I mean, who throws masquerade balls anymore?” She shook her head, laughing.

            “Are you and him friends? Levi told me that he would kill him without hesitation. Is that true?”

            She sat back. “Oh yeah. He’d kill Levi in the blink of an eye. Not because he hates him, but because he doesn’t take kindly to anyone threatening what he has accomplished. No one likes living in the underground, Eren. Erwin doesn’t want to be reminded of his days there. The only reason he keeps in contact with me is because I got out of there just like him.”

            “You lived there?”

            “Born and raised,” she said. “I was very fond of science. That’s what led me to venture my way out into the real world. It was different, but I managed okay. It took me awhile to get the hang of things and land myself a job, but I made it.”

            I looked out the window, watching the trees move passed us in a blur of color. “Why can’t Levi do that?”

            “He’s tried before. The police picked him up every time. They don’t like dealing with him, because they know who he is, so they just toss him back in the underground. Eventually, he gave up.”

            I clenched my hands, dropping my head. He had tried to get out of there and they wouldn’t let him escape the confines that he had been born in. No matter what happened tonight, I would make sure to survive, because I would get him out of the underground no matter what. I wasn’t going to let him live out the rest of his days there. He deserved better—they all did.

            Tonight, I would do what was required of me. Even if it meant hurting someone, I didn’t care. Erwin had to hear us out. He had plenty of money to supply us with the weapons we needed. All he had to do was give us fifteen minutes of his time to explain everything. That shouldn’t be too much to ask for. How could he sit there on his throne of luxury while the people he left behind were still suffering?

            “That’s quite an expression you got going on,” Hanji said, eyeing me. “I know what you’re feeling. Levi, and everyone else who lives in that place, has been through a lot. Yet no one out here will give them the time of day. They won’t give them the opportunity to try and improve their lives. I’m not for killing people, but that’s what it comes down to when you live there—it become instinctual, a means to survive. That’s why I’m helping with this mission, because I’m tired of this all.”

            As she turned onto a cobblestone road, I realized that this would lead us to Erwin Smith’s house. I could see the mansion looming in the distance, surrounded by a tall, wrought iron fence. It looked like a house straight out of a James Bond movie. Erwin had really gone the extra mile when it came to spending his money.

            Who needed a house this big?

            “And so the night begins,” Hanji said when she reached the main gate. There were two security guards standing by, watching her with rapt attention as she punched in a four-digit code that would open the gate.

            As it slowly swung open, I prepared myself for what the night had in store for us.

            As of right now, anything could happen.     

             

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did any of you guess who was Erwin's "daughter"? Tbh, the only reason I picked Krista is because she's blonde and has blue eyes (like Erwin), even though she's not really his daughter. He brought her out of the underground not only because he wanted to help her, but also because she could pass as his child. (I'll explain more in later chapters, I promise.)
> 
> Anyhoooo, thank you for reading and commenting! 1,000 hearts go out to you!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is the longest it has taken me to update, but I came down with the flu and I'm barely recovering from being sick. Also, this mission is dragging out, but there will be a lot of action in the next chapter. 
> 
> Thank you guys for supporting me. It means a lot, and I'm grateful to everyone who is reading this and sticking to it. :)
> 
> Now go on and read.

The interior of Erwin’s mansion was just as grand as the exterior. The décor was fit for royalty, and the second I passed the threshold, I felt out of place. Everyone walking about looked at ease in their fine gowns and tuxes, while I kept tugging at my bow tie to loosen it around my neck. I couldn’t be more uncomfortable.

            How was I ever going to make it through the night without sticking out like a sore thumb?

            Hanji must have sensed my uneasiness, because she looped her arm through mine as we walked through the crowd, smiling at everyone who passed us. She had put on her mask before we entered the house. It went over her eyes and was a champagne color that sparkled under the fluorescent lighting above. It also matched the shade of her dress.

            “Are you comfortable in that?” I whispered to her, knowing that she preferred jeans over a skirt any day.

            “Are you kidding me?” she mumbled under her breath. “I want to tear out of this thing like The Incredible Hulk, but I have to look the part—just like you.” She scanned the folks that moved by us. “Erwin probably doesn’t even know half of the people here. They’re just high-class morons who want to dress elegant and chat amongst themselves about the ‘hardships’ of having too much money.”

            I looked around, glad to see that no one was paying us any attention. “Does he host stuff like this often?”

            “More than you care to know. Speaking of the devil. There he is.” She subtly jerked her chin to the right and I followed the direction with my eyes.

            Standing in the entryway to the ballroom was a tall man with blonde hair. He had an undercut like Levi, but was big everywhere Levi was small. They were exact opposites, yet they were both capable of leading a large group of men in the underground. I knew there was a lot more to Erwin Smith than meets the eye. To treat him like anything other than what he was would be a mistake on my part. I had to be on my guard around him at all times.  

            “There’s Krista beside him,” Hanji said.

            There was only one person standing next to Erwin and she looked every bit like a Daddy’s princess as Levi had informed me. Though there was something about her that told me she wasn’t as sweet as she appeared. Whenever she thought no one was looking at her, she would get this gleam in her eyes, like she couldn’t stand the fact that she was being forced to greet guests in a pale-yellow gown that dipped off her slender shoulders.  

            “She looks miserable,” I noted.

            “She is. I told you she doesn’t like these types of things, but Erwin makes her attend all the shenanigans he throws. Now”—Hanji pulled me toward them—“let me introduce you.”

            There was no going back now. I was in this for the long run. I couldn’t afford to make any mistakes, because now they could put many lives in danger, which meant I couldn’t think about Levi. If I thought about him, I wouldn’t be able to focus on the task at hand. Right now I had one thing to do: Get Krista out of the ballroom once the festivities started. Once I did that, I could worry about whether Levi had succeeded or not.

            As we approached Erwin, he caught sight of us, a huge smile lifting the sides of his mouth. He had on a white mask that covered one side of his face, giving him a resemblance to the villain of _The Phantom Of The Opera_. This whole night was so cliché. It almost felt like he was taking outfits straight out of movies. In fact, I would bet on it.

            “Who’s this?” Erwin questioned when we finally reached him, his vivid blue eyes settling on my face.

            “This here is Eren,” Hanji said, throwing her arm over my shoulders to pull me closer to her. “I’ll be babysitting him for the night. Isn’t that right?” She grinned at me and I nodded, hoping that I came off as some clueless teen.

            “Eren, is it?” Erwin peered at me in a way that made me feel as though he could see right through my façade, but I forced myself to keep eye contact with him. “How do you know Hanji?” It was a simple question, but I knew he wasn’t asking out of curiosity. He knew Hanji had connections with Levi and I was a complete stranger to him. So he was taking precautions, trying to see if I actually was just some boy Hanji was watching over tonight.

            I shrugged, feigning disinterest. “She’s friends with my mom.” I didn’t want to give him any type of detailed answer, because then my lie would be far too easy to spot. Also, if I were a normal teenager being forced to come to some ball, then it would be natural for me to act this way.

            He stared at me for a couple seconds before he placed his hands on Krista’s shoulders, moving her forward. “Allow me to introduce you to my daughter Krista. You seem to be around the same age as her.”

            Krista lifted her hand up in greeting, but when that didn’t satisfy her father, she curtsied. “Good evening.”

            “Good evening,” I responded, meeting the fire in her blue eyes as she straightened up. Her blonde hair was pinned up in an elegant bun, strands of it falling in spiraled curls on either side of her face.

            “Let’s head inside,” Hanji said in an ecstatic voice, dragging me into the ballroom. Erwin and Krista were quick to follow us in, keeping in stride with us as we made our way through the immense crowd. “He suspects you.”

            I gave Hanji a quick glance before I returned my gaze to the many people in front of me. “How do you know?”

            She steered me to the left, heading towards a mini bar. “It was the way he was looking at you. Just try to act casual, and stay away from Krista until I have him distracted. Got it?”

            “Got it.”

            “Now go make conversation with strangers. Don’t keep tabs on them. Right now they’re keeping their eyes on you and you need to seem like you don’t give two shits about them.”

            I slowed my pace until she was in front of me, then I merged in with the crowd, passing a sea of masked faces that held no expression. This wasn’t going to be as easy as I thought it would be. Once again I overestimated my abilities. Krista didn’t seem the least bit interested in interacting with me, and that’s what needed to be done if I was going to convince her to get out of the ballroom, away from her father’s prying eyes.

            About now, Levi and his gang would be sneaking into the mansion. They were somewhere in this monstrosity of a house, which meant that time was ticking. I didn’t have the entire night to whisk Krista off her feet. There had to be something I could do, something I could say that would get her to follow me out of here. After she was away from everyone, I could use force to get her into the room Levi had picked out. Then she would be taken off my hands and my duty would be over.

            With all these thoughts racing through my mind, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going, but it still startled me when I bumped into someone, nearly knocking them over. I reached out and caught the girl by the arm, steadying her.

            “I’m sorry,” I said, releasing her slender arm.

            The girl sneered at me. “Watch where you’re going, dumbass.”

            I blinked several times, processing what she had just said to me. As I did, she glared at me, crossing her arms over her chest with an unfathomable expression on her face. Why did I get the feeling that running into her wasn’t merely an accident? She wasn’t going anywhere, which struck me as odd. Shouldn’t she be on her way?

            “Will do,” I muttered, moving passed her, but she snatched my wrist up, yanking me towards her.

            “Where do you think you’re going, sunshine? You almost knocked me on my ass. The least you could do is dance with me.”

            Before I could protest, she swung us into the crowd in time with the soft music playing overhead, pulling me against her. She smiled at me in a malicious way when I shoved her, trying to unlock her hold on me, but she was strong—a lot stronger than she looked. She kept me in place with ease, moving me around like I was nothing more than a puppet doll.

            “What the hell is your problem?” I snapped.

            “Oh, it bites.” She laughed, and I had half a mind to yank the green Venetian mask off of her face, but that would encourage her to do the same to me, and I couldn’t reveal what I looked like. “I saw you come in with Hanji.”

            “So?” I shot back. For the time being, I let her whirl me around the dance floor. I had to think of a way to get away from her. With how she was acting, she must be working for Erwin.

            How was I going to be able to follow through with getting Krista out of here with this girl getting in my way?

            She leaned in close to me, her red hair obscuring her golden-brown, intimidating eyes. “I know who you’re working for.”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I once again tried to pull away from her, but to no avail. She wrapped her arm around my waist, keeping me pressed up against her.

            “You know exactly what I’m talking about. You work for Levi Ackerman. Krista and I are on your side, smart stuff, so shut up and listen to what I have to say. If you don’t, this may very well be the last night of your life. Erwin is onto you. He doesn’t trust Hanji, and that’s who you came with.”

            Shit. This girl knew about Levi. Should I keep on playing dumb? Or should I listen to what she had to say? Even if I didn’t confess that I was, in fact, working for Levi, I had a feeling that she would tell me everything she had to say. So it was best that I kept my mouth shut for the time being.

            “Hanji is just a friend of my mom’s,” I said, sounding irritated. “You’re out of your mind. Let me go already.”

            She laughed. “So you’re going to play hard to get, are you? I have ways of convincing you.” Something pressed against my stomach as she spoke the last two words and I couldn’t pinpoint what it was by just the feel of it, but when I glanced down, I saw the barrel of a gun. “Willing to listen now?”

            I glared at her, anger overwhelming me. “No. Who the fuck do you think you are?”

            “There it is,” she said, her eyes lighting up with excitement. “There’s the fire that Levi likes. I can see why he let you in his gang in such a short amount of time.”

            I moved closer to her, feeling the barrel of the gun press into my skin as she used it to hike up my shirt. “Who are you?”

            With how close we were to one another, the people surrounding us couldn’t see the pistol she was using to threaten me into submission. But would she really shoot me in front of everyone? Or was it all talk? If it was, I could attempt to escape. Maybe then I stood a chance at getting Krista out of the ballroom. I had to do whatever it took to complete what I came here to do.

            I couldn’t let Levi down. He was counting on me. So many people were counting on me…

            “My name’s Ymir,” the girl said, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Listen, I know there’s no reason for you to trust me, but if you don’t, a lot of people will die tonight. Erwin knows all about Levi’s plan. He has a spy in the underground that keeps tabs on him. He knows everything.”

            I clenched my teeth, narrowing my eyes at her. “You’re right. There _is_ no reason for me to trust you. Why should I? You’re at Erwin’s ball, and you bumped into me after he suspected me.”

            “I don’t have time for this.” Without any warning, she grabbed my arm, using her hold on it to whirl me around so my back was facing her front. She pinned my arm behind my back, causing me to wince as she shoved me forward through the crowd. “I didn’t say I was going to give you a choice, princess.”

            Struggling against her, I asked, “Where are you taking me?”

            “Somewhere that you can talk to Krista in private. Now stop moving around. You’re drawing attention to us.”

            Ymir was right. There were many people looking our way, so I stopped fighting her, letting her restrain me and push me forward.

            The only advantage she had right now was the fact that she had a weapon. Even if I were to get her alone, a knife stood no chance against a gun. I would have to be tactful, but would I survive a confrontation with her? She was strong, and was easily keeping hold of me, which royally pissed me off. What was the point of training every day if I was going to have my ass handed over to me by the first enemy I came across?

            No. I wasn’t going to accept defeat. I had to fight.

            Without much thought, I threw my head back, feeling it smash against her face. When her grip loosened, I took the chance to spin around, taking out the knife that was hidden in my back pocket. Knowing that she would chase after me if I let her go now, I struck her in the leg with it, feeling the blade sink into her flesh. She didn’t cry out, merely gritted her teeth as I yanked the knife out, the blood that spilled out staining her emerald-colored gown.

            “You idiot,” she snarled, clutching her wounded leg. “You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.”

            “I can’t trust you.” With anger fueling my every move, I snatched the gun out of her hand, sliding it into the waistband of my slacks. “I’m going to finish what I came here to do.”

            I was grateful for the loud music that had muffled the sounds of our tussle. There were some people looking at us in confusion, but I couldn’t be bothered with them. As it was, they weren’t doing anything to help out, just staring. So long as they didn’t cause a scene, I could get out of here undetected.

            Leaving Ymir behind, I forced my way through the crowd, heading toward the last spot I had seen Krista. She was coming with me whether she liked it or not. I didn’t have any more time to waste. Levi’s men would be heading for the room I was supposed to be in soon, and I had to be in there with Krista when they reached it.

            The weight of the gun reassured me that I could take out anyone who got in my way with ease. I had told Levi that I would kill if it came down to it, and I would. I was going to make it out of here alive, with the task that had been given me completed.

            Krista was standing near the punch bowl, sipping on a cup of it. When her eyes landed on me, they widened. I smirked at her, because her plan had fallen through. I wasn’t with Ymir and I was going to prove to her that I wasn’t someone to take lightly.

            “Eren?” she said, smiling. “Are you enjoying the ball?”

            “Cut the shit. Your little gal pal is back there with a cut open leg. Who do you take me for?”

            She put down the cup on the nearby table. “What did you do to Ymir?”

            “The same thing I’m going to do to you, if you don’t cooperate,” I said, grabbing her arm. I dragged her toward the doorway, uncaring how I looked while doing it.

            “You don’t understand,” Krista murmured as we neared the exit. “I want to help you. Erwin hasn’t been the same since we left the underground and he’s willing to hurt the people he once cared for. He _will_ kill Levi tonight. I’m trying to prevent that, but I won’t be able to if you’re going to go through with his plan.”

            I tightened my grip on her arm, feeling her skin grind against the palm of my hand. “Just shut up.”

            “Listen to me, dammit!” She reached for the gun hidden beneath my shirt, but I forced her up against the wall now that we were away from everyone. She stared at me, determination sharpening her features. “Levi doesn't stand a chance. There’s a spy amongst his men. Erwin knows all the details of tonight’s mission. He knows about you, knows that you’re Levi’s significant other.”

            I wrapped my hand around her neck, fury bubbling up within me. “What is Erwin planning to do to him?”

            Krista didn’t look frightened, even as my fingertips dug into her skin. “Hurt him. Send a message. But he’ll be able to do that a lot easier through hurting you.”

            “What?”

            “Right now there are four men waiting for us in the room you’re needing to get me in. Once we’re inside, they will attack and capture you. They’ll use you against Levi.”

            I looked into her eyes, but all I saw there was sincerity. Could she be telling me the truth? Could I trust her?

            “Eren,” she said. “Please. Let me help you.”

            “How can I be sure that I can trust you?”

            She put her hands against her chest. “Tie me up and take me into any room you’d like. Just not the one that Levi picked out.”

            “What about the men that are going there? They’re my friends.”

            “You either save them, or you save Levi. There are no other options.”

            I couldn’t save everyone. It was best that I accepted that now.

            “Turn around,” I muttered. She did so without hesitation, putting her hands behind her back. Undoing the bow tie from around my neck, I used it to tie her wrists together. I made sure that it was tight, that there would be no leeway for her to slip her hands out. “If this is a trap, I’ll make sure that I kill you.”

            She looked at me over her shoulder. “This isn’t a trap.” Her eyes moved down, locking on the grip of the gun. “That’s a .44 magnum revolver. It holds six bullets and is a very powerful gun. If you’re planning to use it, just know that whomever you’re shooting will be dead with one shot. Do you know how to work it?”

            “Not a clue.”

            “Take it out,” she instructed, and I did what she asked of me. “Hold it with both hands. The recoil will knock you back if you don’t.” I gripped the gun with both hands, holding my arms out straight. “No. Slightly bend your arms. Yes, like that. Good. You’re ready. Now tell me where to go.”

            “Go down the hall and into the third room on your left.”

            Krista began to walk forward, not once looking back at me. I aimed the gun at her back, hoping that I wouldn’t have to use it. Even when I was willing to kill to make it out of here alive, that didn’t mean I wanted to take a life.

            When we reached the room, I leaned forward to push the door open, making sure no one was around before we slipped inside. I flipped on the light, met with a bedroom that was just as extravagant as the rest of the house.

            “Sit down on the bed,” I ordered, keeping the gun trained on her. “How are you going to help me?”

            “Keeping you out of Erwin’s grasp is enough for now, but we’ll have to find Levi. We need to inform him about all of this. If you’re not where you need to be, then all hell will break loose. From what Erwin has told me, you mean a lot to Levi.”

            “Since Erwin knew about the plan all along, he wanted you to let me take you into that room, didn’t he?”

            She nodded. “Yes, but I don’t want any harm to come to any of Levi’s men. Before I moved out here, they were my family. They all took care of me. Erwin seems to have forgotten all about that. He’s become selfish and self-centered, and I refuse to be a pawn in his little game.”

            I breathed in, willing my body to stop trembling. This was becoming too real for me. I thought that I could handle all of this, but when it came to Levi’s life, I lost control. How much more could I take? What if something went wrong? There was only so much I could do on my own, but I didn’t know if that would be enough. With Erwin knowing about the plan, he had the advantage. He knew where all of Levi’s men were located. Where did that leave us?

            “Erwin is expecting me to follow through tonight,” Krista said. “Capturing you plays a big part in his strategy to detain Levi. We have a chance, Eren. But lives will be lost tonight—from both sides. There isn’t a way for us to change that.”

            Shaking the gun in front of me, I told her, “This won’t be enough. Six bullets won’t stand against an army of men.”

            “I know that. I have more weapons stashed in a closet upstairs. If we get up there unseen, we can get them.” She dropped her eyes, staring at the plush brown carpet. “How bad is Ymir hurt?”

            “She won’t be of much help. I injured her leg. She won’t be able to walk on it for a while, but she’ll be all right.”

            She sighed in relief. “We need to get a move on. Erwin’s plan will be in motion soon, and we need to be ahead of him if we’re going to stand a chance at gaining the upper hand. Are you ready?” She stood up, turning her back to me.

            “As ready as I’ll ever be,” I said, untying her wrists.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise it won't take me 5 days to update with Chapter 18. I'm feeling a lot better, which means I'll be able to write more. :)
> 
> I'm excited for the next chapter. A lot is going to happen.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading! ❤


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to start this off by saying that my stories were stolen by 2 user's on Wattpad. One took this fanfic and my completed one (even my one shot). The other just took my completed fic. But they were both taking credit and claiming my writing as their own, but since a lot of my IG followers (in fact it was one of my followers that informed me about it to begin with) were on my side, I was able to get them to delete the work they had taken without my permission. I just want to let you all know that my work is on no other sites. It's only on AO3, and if you ever see it elsewhere, please do not hesitate to let me know. I will submit a form for copyright infringement, because writing is hard work, and if you don't believe that, then please try it for yourself. (P.S. I am _not_ all right with my work being reposted on any other site. To do so is stealing, and I will take action.)
> 
> With all that said, I hope you guys' enjoy this chapter. I wasn't sure if I was going to update, due to what happened, but I want to complete this fic. Though now I will be keeping a watchful eye on other fanfic sites, because it truly hurt me to see someone else taking credit for my hard work. :(

Krista rubbed at her wrists as she walked over to the door, slowly pulling it open to peer out into the hallway. She looked back at me, giving a soft nod of her head before she went out, with me right on her heels. As of right now, I was at her mercy. I was aware that she could betray me at any time, but I couldn’t ignore the fact that she knew things about Levi’s plan that only the people involved should know. If I went through with my part in it, and what she said was true, then I would be signing Levi’s death warrant. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if that happened, so I was going to put my trust in someone who was the adopted daughter of Erwin Smith—our enemy.

            As we continued down the hall, she slipped out of her white heels, leaving them behind without a care. She also took off her mask, hiding it in a potted plant that was by the foot of the stairs. So far, we hadn’t run into anyone, which I couldn’t decide if that was a good or bad sign. This could very well be a trap that I was walking into. If so, I hoped that only I would die, and that Levi would be able to escape.

            “Do you love him?” Krista asked suddenly, hurrying up the stairs.

            I stared at her for a moment before I said, “Yes.”

            “I thought as much. I wouldn’t be helping you, if I didn’t.” She glanced back at me, a small smile on her face. “He did a lot for me when I was still living in the underground. If anyone deserves love, it’s him. I won’t sit back and watch Erwin take that away from him. He has no right to.”

            For our sake, I hoped that she was telling the truth, that this wasn’t all some setup. If it was, I didn’t know what I would do to get myself out of it. Most likely, they would have made prior plans for if I attempted to escape. And if that were the case, I was stuck. There was no going back; there was only the option of moving forward. Whether I was moving toward safety or danger, I had no way of knowing, but I was going anyway.

            For Levi—always for Levi.

            “We’re almost there,” Krista said, rushing up the last few steps. “Anything can happen from here on out, so pay close attention to your surroundings and be ready to shoot.”

            I ignored the shaking in my limbs as I brought the gun up to eye level. If I was going to make it through the night, I had to remain strong. Now was not the time to give into the apparent fear coursing through my body. I had desperately wanted to be a part of this mission, to prove that I was capable of handling my own in these types of situations. Tonight had taken a turn for the worst, and now there was a lot more expected of me, but I was going to do what I had to.

            Krista led the way down a spacious hallway that left no room for hiding. It was well lit, and if anyone showed up, we’d be seen right away. I didn’t like this one bit, but I kept walking, ready for just about anything.

            “Here it is,” Krista said, stopping in front of a narrow door. She opened it up, revealing numerous weapons. A smile appeared on her face as she bent down and retrieved a gun. “Uzi Pro. Holds up to twenty-five rounds.”

            “Thanks for the information, but I think we should get a move on.”

            She nodded, grabbing a variety of things that she slipped into a bag that had been hung up in the corner of the closet. Kneeling down, she wrapped something around my upper thigh. “It’s a holster for this.” She pulled out a mean looking knife that looked like it could stab straight through someone’s stomach. “You seem a lot more handy with knives than guns.”

            “Do you think we’ll need all of this?” I asked as she tucked it into the holster.

            “Unfortunately, yes.” She stood up, staring me in the eyes. “Have you killed someone before?”

            I shook my head. “No.”

            “Well, you will tonight. There’s no doubt about that in my mind. Even if you think you’re capable of it, you’ll never be prepared for the feeling of guilt and self-loathing that comes along with it, but you will need to keep going. Understand?”

            I glanced down at the knife, swallowing down the lump that had formed in my throat. “I understand.”

            “Okay.” She turned around, facing her back to me. “Unzip me. I won’t be able to run in this.”

            My initial reaction was to protest, but we didn’t have time for that, so I took hold of the zipper, pulling it down until it wouldn’t go any further. The gown pooled at her feet and she stepped out of it, naked from the waist up.

            Krista reached inside the closet, producing a white T-shirt and black shorts. After she dressed in them, she buckled a gun belt around her waist that held two pistols on either side of her hips. She had really prepared for this night and I had to wonder if I would make it through it all. This was my first mission. I had no prior experience.

            Did I have what it took to survive?

            “Come on,” she said, shoving her feet into knee-high combat boots. “The clock is ticking.”

            The second the words were out of her mouth, she was running, throwing the drawstring bag over her shoulder as she made her way back down the hallway. I darted after her, realizing where we were going. She was heading for the rooftop, knowing that was our best bet at finding Levi.

            “Let’s hope that Levi still operates the same,” she said, yanking one of the guns out of the holster at her waist. “If we can’t find him beforehand, then things are going to get messy.” She stopped as she reached the stairs. “Did he keep his location from you a secret?”

            “Yes.”

            “He really didn’t want you coming after him, did he?”

            I sighed, giving a little shake of my head. “No, he didn’t. He wanted me out of the mansion the instant I got you into that room. When he sees me with you, he’ll take you down.”

            “Oh, I know he will.” She chuckled. “But he won’t kill me. He doesn’t like needless death, after all.” She jerked her head to the left. “Come on. We still have two more flights of stairs before we’re up on the roof.”

            After that, we didn’t speak. My heart was racing inside my chest and it sounded too loud in my ears. I felt like I wouldn’t be able to hear someone approaching. Would they even take the time to restrain me? Or would they just shoot me down and clean up the mess later?

            Our feet smacked against the carpeted steps as we rushed up them. There were so many thoughts crossing my mind, but I couldn’t focus on a single one of them. The panic running through me was palpable, seeming to have a physical embodiment that was wrapping its arms around me, weighing me down to the point where I felt like every step I took would be my last. How was Levi capable of going on missions without losing his mind? When did he grow so accustomed to fear?

            When we reached the top of the last set of steps, Krista took hold of the door handle, making eye contact with me.

            “Here’s where it starts,” she said. “Either Levi is up here with his men, or, if Erwin suspects me, we’ll be greeted by a handful of _his_ men. Are you ready?”

            I didn’t think there was a proper response to that question, so I simply nodded, raising the gun up and putting my finger on the trigger. I counted out the seconds it took for her to twist the handle before she pushed the door open, dashing out onto the rooftop with her gun drawn. I followed after her, trying to follow her example, but my legs felt as heavy as bags of sand.

            “Levi?” Krista called, her voice sounding too loud in the silence that surrounded us. “I mean you no harm. I’m here with Eren. We both need to speak with you. Levi, if you’re out there, please give me some type of signal.”

            It remained silent, dark. There was no signal or response and the gun shook violently in my grasp. Maybe he wouldn’t answer if he just heard Krista. Maybe he would stay hidden unless he knew, without a doubt, that I was with her. I had to say something.

            “Levi,” I said in a trembling voice. “What she’s saying is the truth. She is not threatening me in any way. She wants to help.”

            Once again, we were met with silence and nothing more. He wasn’t here—no one was. We had to look somewhere else.

            As I turned to tell Krista this, there was a sudden movement to our right. She immediately turned toward it while I squinted at the shadow of a body in front of us.

            “Too tall,” I said. “It’s too tall to be Levi.”

            Without hesitance, she lowered her gun and fired. In the quiet that followed the loud bang of the shot, I heard muffled moaning. I walked toward the fallen man, sighing in relief when I saw that it wasn’t someone I recognized.

            “Shit,” Krista hissed. “It’s one of Erwin’s. We have to get the fuck out of here. There will be more men coming.” She took off running and I was quick to follow after her.

            “Where are we going?”

            “We’re going to have to sneak back inside. We can’t go back the way we came. There will be men there now.” She cursed under her breath. “I should have known that Erwin would predict my betrayal. The next set of men we come across won’t take it easy on us. What happened just now was a test. That was Erwin giving me a chance to turn you over, but I didn’t. Now he’s going to consider me his enemy and will treat me as such.”

            I tried to process her words, but couldn’t take it all in. Everything was happening too fast. “Does he already have Levi?”

            “I doubt it. You’d be surprised at just how perceptive Levi is. He’ll see this coming, and it wouldn’t surprise me if he caught on the moment he set foot in this godforsaken mansion.”

            I could only hope that she was right, and that Levi had foreseen this in time to do something about it. “What are we going to do once we’re inside?”

            “Get out while we still can.”

            I looked over at her, skidding down the roof tiles that were slick beneath my feet. “What do you mean ‘get out while we can’? We can’t just leave everyone behind.”

            “Whether you like to hear this or not, it’s everyone for themselves now. If we stick around, we’re going to get caught. What did Levi instruct you to do if things got serious?”

            Stopping, I squeezed my eyes shut, clenching my fists by my side. He had told me to get out, to save myself. But when had I ever listened to what someone had told me to do? Never, and I wasn’t about to start now. I wouldn’t leave him here to fend for himself. I may not be as skilled as him, but I would do anything within my power to help him out of here.

            “Go ahead,” I said. “Leave. I won’t stop you. But I’m staying back.”

            She stared at me for a long while before she took my hand in hers. “You really do love him.” She tightened her grip. “I’ll stay with you. We’re in this together. Whatever happens from here on out, happens. I can’t guarantee anything, but I’m pretty sure you knew that already.”

            I nodded once. “Where do we go from here?”

            “The basement,” she murmured. “That’s where Erwin would take anyone he’s found.” She dropped my hand, sighing. “This is such a shitty situation. The chances of us succeeding aren’t very high. We’d have a better shot at getting out of here, but I doubt we’d even be able to pull that off. By now, Erwin has probably already notified the front guards to keep an eye out for us.”

            A droplet of water landed on my cheek and I tilted my head back to look at the cloudy night sky. This truly was a shitty situation, but we couldn’t just give up and turn ourselves over. We had to keep on fighting until there was nothing left in us to fight.

            Krista stuck her hands up. “It’s raining. This is good. It can give us enough coverage to get back inside without being seen. Let’s go. We’ve been standing around for too long.” She ran up the sloped part of the roof, reaching back to help me. The shoes I was wearing were not giving me enough grip. When I made it to the top, she said, “The ball is still going on. I’m hoping that it will serve as a distraction for Erwin for some time. He won’t leave until the night is almost over. For once, his need to please his guests will come in handy.”

            We ran along the rooftop and the rain was making it hard to do it quietly. It splashed beneath our feet, serving to make the roof tiles slick. It was a miracle that I didn’t slip.

            “There’s a balcony just up ahead,” Krista said. “That’s our way in.”

            By the time we made it there, we were both soaking wet. The rain was coming down hard, but I was grateful for it, because it was masking the sounds of our decent onto the balcony. Upon landing, I felt Krista’s arm smack against my chest, moving me back into the shadows. She lifted a finger to her lips, her eyes locking on the floor to ceiling windows ahead of us.

            After a few seconds, she raised two fingers up and I could see the dark figures moving about in the room. There were two men that we would have to take out, but were there more that we couldn’t see? There was no way to tell for sure, and we didn’t have a lot of time to be standing around waiting.

            “If you don’t feel comfortable with the gun,” Krista whispered, “now’s a good time to grab the knife I gave you earlier.”

            I let out a long breath of air, giving a sharp shake of my head. “I’m sticking with the gun.” These men were serious and I couldn’t take it easy on them, if I wanted to make it out of here.

            “Fine. Once I open the door, take action. If you give them enough time to react, they will take you out.”

            “Understood.”

            It only took her a second to reach her hand out to pull the door open and even less time to enter the room with a swift speed that let me know she had some training under her belt. But before I could get caught up in my thoughts, I followed her inside; tightening my hold on the grip of the gun, ready to be attacked.

            In a flash, Krista darted forward. The two men caught sight of her, and one whirled around in time to receive a hard smack in the side of the head with the butte of her gun. He teetered to the right and as he did, I caught the other one by surprise, grabbing hold of his wrist and folding it inward. He let out a loud hiss through clenched teeth, and I brought my knee up, ramming it into his stomach and slamming my gun down on his head when he collapsed onto his knees.

            Krista took out the knife holstered at her thigh, bringing it down on the first man’s leg. Afterward, she reached into his shirt, yanking out a thin black cord that was attached to a mouthpiece.

            “Can’t have you contacting Mr. Smith about this, now can we?” she said, grinning as she leaned forward on her toes.

            The man growled in her face, slowly reaching for something behind his back.

            I brought the gun up, training it on his chest. “Don’t move.” The man at my feet rolled over onto his stomach and I kicked him in the side to keep him down. “We need some information, and you guys are going to give it to us.”

            “Take out the wire he’s wearing,” Krista said as she reached behind the man’s back to pull out the gun he was attempting to grab just a few seconds earlier. “Nice try, fucker.”

            I knelt down, pointing the barrel of the gun at the guy’s head. He didn’t move or attempt to stop me as I slipped my hand beneath his shirt, taking hold of the small wire to pull it out, disconnecting it in the process.

            “So, who’s going to be nice enough to tell me where Levi is?” I asked, my voice oozing false kindness. None of them gave a response, simply glaring at me with rage in their eyes, but I wasn’t about to let them get away with silence. “So that’s how it’s going to be. I see.” Slipping the gun in the waistband of my slacks, I slid out the knife from its holster, taking hold of the man’s hair, lifting him up by it to expose his neck. “Are you sure you want to play this way? I won’t show you any mercy—not when it comes to Levi.”

            The man grunted as I pressed the blade to his throat, but didn’t utter a word.

            “Hmm,” I murmured, applying pressure, feeling the blade sink into his skin. “I don’t think you take me seriously.” I gave a sharp swipe and the man let out a whimper. “If I keep going, I’ll slice right through your jugular. Is that what you want? Or do you want to tell me where Levi is?”

            I kept moving the blade until the man shouted, “Erwin’s got him!”

            “Where?” I stopped, but kept the knife where it was.

            “Up in his office,” he muttered. “He won’t do anything to him until he’s got you.”

            I removed the blade from his throat, just to stab him in the leg with it. “I can’t have you walking out of here, but thanks for the info.”

            “We’ll lock them in the bathroom,” Krista told me as I stood up. “There’s a key above each door. Just knock him out. It’ll make it easier.”

            The man in front of me went to get up, but I kicked him in the back of the neck, sending him flying. When he fell to the ground, he was out cold. I walked over to his limp body, hoisting it up into my arms. Then I went to the bathroom, nudging the door open with my foot to dump him inside.

            After we did the same to the other man, we cut up the wires, not wasting a second to leave the room. As we ran down the hallway, the news I had just heard finally hit me. Levi had been caught. Did Erwin trick him? Pretend that he had captured me to get Levi to come willingly? That’s the only thing that made sense to me. Otherwise I was sure that Erwin wouldn’t have been able to capture him.

            “Fuck,” I said.

            Krista gave me a sideways glance. “He’s still alive.”

            “For how much longer?”

            “Until you show up. There’s something else Erwin wants. Otherwise he wouldn’t have waited this long. There has to be some ulterior motive that I don’t know about. Judging by how things are going, I’m sure he’s taken my betrayal into account. It’s also strange that there aren’t more men coming after us. He knows that you won’t leave Levi behind. That’s probably what he’s counting on.”

            “What are you saying?”

            She sighed. “I’m saying that we shouldn’t walk right into his trap. We won’t do any good that way. I think we should come up with another plan, try to gather more of Levi’s men.”

            “We don’t know where any of them are,” I said. “We don’t have all night to be searching.”

            She stopped mid-stride, her hand whipping out to snatch the front of my dress shirt. “Don’t be a damn idiot. Didn’t you hear what that man said back there? Erwin won’t do anything until you arrive. Do you honestly believe that you rushing in there is going to save Levi’s life? Let me tell you this: It won’t. It’ll get both of you killed.”

            I shoved her hand away. “Levi’s men are probably grouped together somewhere, devising a plan. If you want to find them, then I suggest we start with the outer perimeters of the house.”

            “Funny you should say that,” a booming voice said from behind me. I recognized it at once. So did Krista, who spun around with wide eyes to face none other than Erwin Smith. “I thought the same thing, but his men are a lot smarter than I thought. Which is funny, you see, because they aren’t that smart to begin with. Neither are you, for that matter, or you would have listened to my little princess when she tried to get you to leave.” He turned his blue eyes on her. “Tsk-tsk, Krista. Why would you go behind Daddy’s back like this? I’m hurt.”

            She glared at him. “Why are you doing this?”

            “Now that’s a mighty fine question,” he bellowed, men showing up to form a line behind him. “And we’ll discuss that plenty once we get you two back up to my office. Now let’s go about this in a civilized manner, shall we? There doesn’t need to be anymore blood spilt tonight.”

            “If you put one finger on Levi, I’ll—”

            Erwin interrupted me when he stepped forward, taking a firm hold of the mask I wore. He tugged on it until the ribbon gave way, and then he stared at my face, smiling. “Ah, such a pretty little face you have. I can see why Levi has taken such a liking to you.” He laughed, tossing my mask to the side. “You should have seen him earlier. He’s so angry right now, because he thinks I have you. Well”—he shrugged—“that’s true now. Go ahead and grab them, boys’. And don’t be afraid to give them a little hit to keep them in line. I don’t need them making a scene. The ball is still going on, after all.”

            The men walked around him. They were all wearing black suits and sunglasses that reminded me of FBI agents. When one of them approached me, I stepped back, ready to bolt, but Krista shook her head and I knew she was telling me that it wouldn’t be of any use to run. Still, the instinct to do so was strong, even more so when the man took hold of my wrists, wrapping a large zip tie around them.

            “Don’t give me any trouble now,” Erwin said as he watched on with a gleaming smile. “I wouldn’t want to take out my frustration on Levi. Or would you like that?”

            I gritted my teeth, lunging forward, but the man restraining me pushed me back. “Fuck you!” I snarled. “I won’t let you get away with this.”

            He grinned. “We’ll see about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn. Another chapter and the mission is still going on, but next chapter it will be over and there might even be some smut.
> 
> (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) *cough cough* We'll have to wait and see how this all goes, now won't we?
> 
> I'm still a bit upset over what happened earlier, but if I let that get me down, then I wouldn't be able to share my work with the people who actually respect me as a writer. For those of you that do, thank you very much. It's you who keep me writing and you who are welcomed to read my work. For those that have stolen my work, I'd rather you didn't read my fanfic's any longer, though I cannot stop you. (I wish I could tbh)
> 
> Anyway, let's not make this depressing. As always, thank you for the comments and kudos. They make my day! :)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was done last night, but due to something scary that happened, I had to wait to post it until tonight. Anyway, let's not get into that, this chapter brings forth a new problem, but also is very sweet. The Ereri feels are strong. 
> 
> I hope you guys aren't expecting hot and steamy smut, because this is Eren's first time, so it's just sweet and cute (as it should be, in my opinion). I'm getting carried away, so go on and read, my lovelies. :)

As we walked down the hall, Erwin made a show of coming to stand next to me, reaching out a large hand to pet my arm in an almost adoring way. It made my stomach squirm in disgust. What game was he playing here? Whatever it was, I wanted no part of it.

            He _tsk_ ed as he crawled his fingers up to the collar of my shirt. “Such a shame. You’ve wrinkled your suit.”

            I glared at him, the tightness of the zip tie around my wrists reminding me that there was no means of escape. Even so, the urge to flee was tangible, pumping through my veins and making me cringe whenever his fingertips grazed any part of me. I didn’t like where this was going and I had a feeling that he would be using this tactic once we made it up to his office.

            He was aiming to provoke Levi, and with how he was acting now, I had no doubt that he would succeed. The bastard was going to use me against him, which made me want to lash out and stop everything before it even begun, but I had no way of doing that. I was utterly powerless as his men continued to drag me toward our destination.

            “That’s a nice expression,” Erwin said, trailing a finger down the side of my face. “It suits you.”

            I leaned away from him, ignoring the forceful tug one of his men gave me to keep me in line. “Fuck off.”

            He chuckled, completely undeterred by my remark. “It’s cute, really, how Levi fell for a little punk like you. I never saw it coming, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t appreciate you waltzing into his life.” He smirked at me, those intense blue eyes narrowing as they observed every inch of my face. “To be quite honest, you’ve made tonight’s operation rather easy.”

            It was the last thing I wanted to hear, but something I knew to be true. What had been the purpose of me coming tonight? I hadn’t accomplished anything I set out to do, and now I was going to be used against the one person that I didn’t want to see hurt. I racked my brain for anything that could possibly change Erwin’s mind, but there was nothing, and the surge of guilt and fear that overtook me in a flash of realization made my legs weak.

            This could be the end. I couldn’t prevent what was about to happen, and even if I attempted to escape, I was sure Erwin’s men wouldn’t let me get far. Plus, I would never leave without Levi. It was because of me that he was stuck in this mess to begin with.

            I bit down on my lower lip hard enough to draw blood, frustration mixing in with the rest of the emotions I was feeling. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. Everything should have gone smoothly, exactly as planned. So why had things turned out this way? I felt like a mouse caught in a trap, just awaiting my demise.

            “Hmm,” Erwin hummed, shooing the man behind me away. He grabbed hold of the zip tie restraining me and gave it a sharp tug, drawing my attention to him. “What is on your mind?”

            I bared my teeth at him. “I don’t have to tell you.”

            “You’ve got quite a mouth on you. What if I wanted to help you? Would you still be treating me so disrespectfully?”

            Was he serious?

            “You don’t want to help me,” I said. “If you did, you wouldn’t have put these on.” I stretched my arms out as far as they would go, pulling the zip tie tight until it dug into my skin.

            He slapped my wrist hard enough to make me relax my muscles. “You need to learn some self-control, or perhaps this behavior of yours is why Levi is so drawn to you. Either way, I won’t stand for it, so may I suggest some restraint on your part.”

            I peered up at him, waiting to see amusement light up his eyes, but he looked stern, serious. What was this all about? He had no intention on helping me, so what was he getting at? Was he trying to get a rise out of me? If that was what he was after, then I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

            “We’re almost there,” he said, steering me up a short flight of stairs that led to a door. When we reached it, he pushed it open, stepping inside and pulling me along with him. The first thing I noticed was the high ceiling and the enormous chandelier that hung down and lit up the well-sized room. Then, after the initial awe wore off, my eyes moved down to land on Levi, who was sitting in a wooden chair in front of a mahogany desk, hands tied behind his back.

            “Levi,” I whispered. His eyes found mine and there was so much pain in them that my heart plummeted. “I…” Words failed me. I wanted to apologize for being useless, for causing him nothing but trouble. If it weren’t for me, this wouldn’t be happening to him right now. He was the underground’s strongest thug, yet he had allowed himself to be captured for a stupid kid like me.

            “Don’t.” The softness in his voice made me glance up at him. “Don’t blame yourself for this.”

            “But—”

            He shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”

            Before I could say anything else, Erwin lugged me over to an empty chair that stood opposite of Levi’s. He forcefully shoved me down onto it, yanking my arms up to loop them behind the back of the chair, making me wince all the while. After I was settled, he patted my head, running his fingers through my hair.

            “So soft,” Erwin commented, his gaze moving over to where Levi sat fuming. “What’s with that face, Levi? Does this bother you?” He continued to stroke my hair, sighing in content, but I knew it was all an act. This was his way of getting him to react.

            I jerked my head away, the chair screeching in protest beneath me. “Don’t fucking touch me.”

            “Don’t be such a nuisance, Eren.” He leaned forward, gripping my chin in his fingers, keeping me from moving. “I’m only admiring you.”

            Why was he doing this? He had us right where he wanted. There was no point in him subjecting us to this nonsense. If he wanted us dead, then there should be no reason for him to draw it out.

            “What do you want?” I asked. “Stop with these games.”

            He smiled at me, leaning in. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking the questions? You snuck into my home, not the other way around.”

            “You had a spy in the underground. You knew we were coming and you know why we’re here. There’s something else you want. Otherwise you would have put an end to all this by now.”

            “Oh, you’re a lot smarter than I presumed.” He straightened up, clasping his hands behind his back. Pacing in front of me, he continued. “You’re right. I did have a spy in the underground. I could have stopped this before it even began, but you’re also right when you say that there is something else that I want.” Turning to Levi, he said, “I require your skills.”

            Levi narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “What are you talking about?”

            “Well, you see, I know of your situation. I know that Reece has become a burden and will continue to be one until you put an end to him. I am also aware that you need my help in order to do that, because although you’re strong, you lack weapons, and without them, you can do nothing.”

            “That still doesn’t explain what you want from me.”

            Erwin held up a finger. “I’m getting there. Be patient.” He turned to face me, bending to stroke my cheek. “It amazes me how you’ve fallen in love with someone this young, but if it weren’t for this kid, I would have never sent one of my men to spy on you.”

            “What?” I said, confused. “How did I have anything to do with that?”

            “The news of your mother’s death was very eye-catching. I recognized Reece’s work right away, but that didn’t explain why he was in Trost. So I dug around and found out all about what happened. It was quite intriguing, to say the least. It also gave me the advantage over Levi that I had been absolutely pining for, because I knew he wouldn’t work for me again unless I had something that he just simply couldn’t lose. And that something is you.”

            Levi glared at him in anger. “What the fuck—”

            “It’s Kenny,” Erwin interrupted.

            At that, Levi’s eyes widened. “What did you do?”

            “That’s none of your concern. The only thing you need to know is that I need you to settle some…business with him.”

            “You want me to kill him?”

            “Indeed.”

            “You say that as though it’ll be easy. You know how dangerous he is. You also know that he’s the one that trained me. He knows how I work.”

            Erwin waved him off, looking annoyed. “I’m not an idiot. I’m aware of all of that, but I also have nothing to lose. I have you in the palm of my hand and you can’t say otherwise. Or are you willing to see this boy die? Because if that’s the case”—he suddenly pulled out a sharp pocket knife from his coat pocket—“then let’s get this over with right here, right now.”

            Levi gritted his teeth, but was quick to respond with: “I’ll do it.”

            “As I knew you would.” Erwin pocketed the knife once again. “Of course if you succeed, I’ll provide you with all the weapons you’re in need of.”

            This whole time Krista had said nothing, but now she spoke up, her voice trembling in fury. “He won’t survive! You’re sending him to his death and you know it.”

            “Hush now,” Erwin murmured, running his pointer finger over his thick eyebrow. “He’s the only one who _can_ survive. Kenny has a soft spot for him.”

            My eyes flicked up to his face. “So now what?” I asked, voicing my thoughts.

            “Levi’s free to go as he pleases. You, on the other hand, will stay with me until the task that is required is complete. It’s very simple, or do I need to explain further?”

            So that’s it. This whole night had been one big set up and we had walked right into it…because of me. It was all because of me.

            “Untie me,” Levi demanded. “I’m not going anywhere tonight. If you’re going to be keeping Eren, then plan on me staying, as well. Direct us to a vacant room and then leave us the fuck alone. I’ve already agreed to what was asked of me, and I’m sure you have men stationed at every exit, so you have nothing to worry about.”

            Erwin smirked. “Oh, I know.” He jerked his chin and one of his men stepped up to Levi, cutting through the zip tie that restrained his hands. The instant he was free, he stood up, coming over to where I sat. “You haven’t even asked about the rest of your men. Aren’t you concerned about them?”

            Levi cradled my face when he reached me, running the pad of his thumb along my cheekbone as he stared into my eyes with concern. Then he held out his hand. “Give me your fucking knife.”

            “So demanding,” Erwin said, reaching into his pocket. “It’s funny how I know you well enough to know that you won’t even attempt anything.”

            “Shut the fuck up and hand it over.” Levi snatched the knife out of his hand, tired of waiting, and walked around to the back of the chair to cut me loose. “You shouldn’t feel so smug. I also know you well to know that you let my men go.”

            Erwin let out a hearty laugh. “I suppose the years we spent together in the underground can’t be erased from one’s memories. Though, if I were given the choice, I would remove them at once.” Lifting up his hand, he signaled for a few of his men to come over to where he stood. “Take them to the Sapphire Room. I want no less then twenty men guarding it, but there’s no need to disturb them. There are no windows in which they can climb out of.” He directed his gaze to Levi. “We’ll speak more of this in the morning.”

            Levi acknowledged him with a nod. Then I was being hauled away, my hand embraced by a gentle hold that made my heart ache. My brain was in a fog and I couldn’t think, couldn’t even begin to wrap my head around everything that had happened tonight. There was nothing I could do to fix any of this, and in the end Erwin had achieved exactly what he had been after, because I had made it easy for him.

            My surroundings were nothing more than a blur in my line of sight as I was led into a room. When the door shut behind us, Levi urged me to sit down on the edge of the massive bed directly in front of us. I did as he asked, sinking down into the soft material. Then it all hit me at once and I broke down, tears welling up in my eyes. I hated crying, hated it since the night my father died, but I couldn’t help myself.

            “Eren—”

            “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I’m really sorry.”

            “Look at me.” He took my face in his hands, forcing me to meet his gaze. “I told you earlier that this isn’t your fault. None of this happened because of you. Erwin would have found a way to get me to do his bidding no matter what.”

            I clenched my fists against my knees, shutting my eyes. “I wanted to help you, but I did the exact opposite. I wanted to come along so I could keep you safe.” I opened my eyes, staring into his. “I never want to see you hurt. I couldn’t bear it. I love you so much, Levi. I’m so in love with you.”

            “Shh.” He pressed a finger to my lips. “We’re both alive tonight. Things may not have turned out like we planned them to, but we aren’t dead. For tonight, we’re okay. Focus on that. Don’t think about all the things that went wrong. There’s no point in that. Just center your attention on the here and now. Can you do that for me?”

            I blew out a shaky breath, nodding, finally taking notice in how close he was to me. I could feel the heat emanating from his body, could smell the intoxicating scent that clung to his skin. His mouth was inches away from mine and I became immersed in the sight of his lips. If I leaned forward just a tiny bit, I could touch them with my own.

            My tongue flicked out to wet my bottom lip, and his eyes followed the movement. A completely new ache began to form, and with how he was looking at me, I was sure he knew what I was feeling.

            “Levi,” I said, my voice strained, sounding odd to me.

            He visibly shook at the sound. He swallowed hard, straightening up. “You’ve”—he cleared his throat—“had a long night, Eren. You should get some sleep.”

            “You told me to focus on the here and now. I am. Levi, I…want you.” The embarrassment that flooded me as the words spilled from my mouth caused a heat to rush to my face, but it was the truth. After tonight, there were no guarantees.

            “Your mind isn’t clear after everything that happened. Get a good night’s sleep. We’ll speak more—”

            “Levi,” I interrupted. “I love you. I want to be with you. You’re the only person I’ve ever wanted to be with like this. This isn’t me jumping at the chance. A whole year could pass by and I’d still want you.” I lifted my hand up to cup his cheek. “Being with you makes me happy.”

            He groaned low in his chest, a sound filled with defeat. “I wanted your first time to happen under different circumstances. We’re not even in our home. We’re at this bastard’s house, in a room that’s covered in silk.”

            “None of that even matters. All that matters to me is that I’m here with you.”

            For a moment, he looked pained. “God, Eren, I don’t deserve you. It amazes me how you don’t see that. I’m nothing and you’re”—he looked at me like I was the most precious thing that existed—“everything.”

            “That’s exactly how I feel about you.”

            He stared at me for a fraction of a second before his lips were on mine, claiming them with an urgency that made me melt against him, completely responsive and unreserved. I didn’t want to be embarrassed, or hide my reactions from him. We only had tonight and I would give him all of me.

            With a flick of his tongue, he deepened the kiss and I moaned into his mouth, needing him in a way that made me impatient. He had never once let me touch him, only ever pleasuring me, but never letting me do anything in return. Now he wasn’t holding anything back, kissing me with a desperation that was completely new to me.

            Needing to feel him, I brought my hands up, taking hold of the front of his shirt to be stopped by the many buttons that were preventing me from touching his bare skin.

            “Tear it open,” he whispered roughly between kisses.

            I gave myself no time to think, simply reacting and ripping apart the fabric. Buttons scattered to the floor below, but I couldn’t care any less, not when I could feel the taut muscles of his stomach beneath my fingertips. He was beyond perfect and I wanted him so badly that everything else just melted away. There was only him.

            I raked my nails down his back and he moaned in response, causing my cock to throb in its confines. With shaky fingers, I went to unclasp the button of his slacks, but he caught my hands in his, bringing them up to his mouth to press soft kisses to my knuckles. Before I could question what he was doing, he gently pushed me back onto the bed, crawling over me.

            “I love you, Eren,” he said, staring down at me. “No matter what happens after tonight, no matter how far apart we may be from one another, just know that my heart remains with you.”

            My breath caught in my throat, but it was released in a groan as he palmed my erection through the material of my pants. My eyes closed of their own accord, and all I could do was feel as he moved his hands up my torso to unbutton my shirt, bending forward to kiss every patch of skin he revealed, leaving no part of me untouched. I slid my fingers into his hair, tangling the long strands in my fists, shaking with desire.

            When I felt his tongue swipe against one of my nipples, I gasped, my back arching off the bed. Seconds later, I was sure I was going to rip his hair out, but he finally eased back and my eyes flew open in time to watch him slip off his shirt. I stared, completely captivated by the sight of his bare chest. I had seen it plenty of times before, but that didn’t make it any less attractive.

            Looking up at him, I ran my fingertips along his side, feeling the shudder that went through him. God, I would never be able to get enough of him, and the thought that I may not have a chance to after this made fear mingle in with the longing. What if this was our first _and_ last time together? The task Erwin had given him was a difficult one, one that he may not survive.

            Suddenly uneasy, I sat up, wrapping my arms around his waist, clinging onto him. “Let’s run away together. I don’t care about Reece anymore. Let’s just get away and—”

            “Eren,” he said, sliding his fingers beneath my chin to tilt my head up, “here and now.”

            “How can I focus on the here and now when—” He pressed his lips to mine, silencing me.

            “Don’t think about any of that, not tonight.”

            I lay back down, concentrating on him and only him. He undid the button of my slacks, grabbing hold of the waistband to slip them off. When I was naked before him, he sat back, his eyes scanning every inch of my body. Soon, his hands followed the path, then his lips and tongue, and by the time he undressed, I was so far gone that all I was capable of doing was staring.

            Every curve of his body was absolute perfection to me. I ogled every part of him, but when he chuckled, I forced my eyes up to his face.

            “What?” I asked.

            He dug out a small vile of lube from the pocket of his slacks. “Isabel gave this to me before we left the house. She slipped it inside my pocket and winked. I guess I owe her one.”

            “I think we both do.”

            Levi poured a good amount of it onto his fingers, leaning over me. I focused my gaze on his face, and when I felt the tip of his index finger at my entrance, I cupped his cheek, overwhelmed with emotion. I didn’t think I was a sap, but I couldn’t picture myself doing this with anyone else but him, and I was glad I was given the chance to have him in this way.

            As his finger slipped inside of me, I found myself pushing down onto it, welcoming the sudden invasion. After some time, he worked a second finger in, stroking inside of me until he grazed something that had me bucking off the bed, a shout tearing from my throat. Whatever he had touched had caused me to react and I propped myself up onto my elbows, looking down at him. He was observing my face with heavy-lidded eyes, but I lost all focus when he added a third finger.

            I was growing impatient, shaking with my desperation. “Levi,” I said, voice trembling. “I can’t… I need…” I couldn’t even form words, but he understood what I meant, because I felt him there, slowly pushing into me. He felt hot and heavy, going deeper and deeper, kissing and caressing me reassuringly all the while.

            When he was fully inside, he asked, “Are you all right?”

            I opened my eyes, unaware that I had closed them. I nodded, and then wrapped my arms around his neck, tugging him closer to me. He didn’t move, running his hand along my side in slow strokes, waiting for me to adjust. It felt strange, but it wasn’t unpleasant. After some time passed, I wriggled beneath him, signaling that I was okay.

            He rolled his hips in response and found a steady pace. Reacting to the sensation he was creating with each thrust, I dug my nails into his shoulders, draping my legs around his lean waist. The new angle caused him to graze that spot inside me, sending a bolt of pleasure throughout my body. Every jerk of his hips was met with incoherent moans on my part and my arms went limp, falling on either side of me on the bed.

            Through the haze, I forced my eyelids open to glance up at him. His expression was contorted in pleasure, black hair falling over his eyes and framing his face. He looked so sexy it hurt. I could look at him like that for forever, but the fire in my lower stomach was building and tightening and I could feel myself getting closer to my release.

            “Eren,” Levi moaned in a gruff voice, and the sound of it was my undoing.

            My back bowed off the bed, my orgasm so intense that I cried out, my legs tightening around him until I had no energy to keep them up. Everything was fuzzy in my afterglow, and the only thing I was aware of was that he was throbbing inside me and groaning my name. Somehow, that’s all that mattered to me.

            When he collapsed on top of me, I held him tight, kissing every part of his face I could reach.

            “Anything,” I said. “I’ll do anything for you.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sobs hideously* The feels. My babies. They're so precious to me, and I just read the latest chapter of the manga, so I'm even more emotional. Just…someone buy me a carton of ice cream and tissues. I'm in need.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading and commenting. You guys are truly amazing. I couldn't do this without your support. ~~(let me love you)~~


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Work has been making time fly by, and I don't know if that is a good thing, or a bad thing. By the time I realized that four days had passed since I last updated, I only had one page of this chapter written. Needless to say, I cracked down and put off watching the latest episode of Tokyo Ghoul and The Vampire Diaries to finish up this chapter. Do you see how I bleed for you guys? Haha I'm kidding. I love you guys, and love this fic, so I really wanted to update.
> 
> Anyway, I would say that I hope you like this chapter, but, um, I don't even like this chapter for many reasons. So…yes, go on and read.

The next morning I awoke to the feel of something gliding along my back. It took me a moment to place it, but when I did, I blushed violently into the pillow my head was lying on, the memories of last night flooding my mind. Levi kept running his fingers up and down my spine, stopping at my tailbone before making his way back up to my nape, completely unaware of my sudden bout of shyness. Though it was a light touch, it sent a fierce shiver through me, alerting him that I was now awake.

            “Good morning,” he whispered, leaning over to leave a trail of kisses along the same path his fingers once took.

            I swallowed, trying to think past the way his lips were causing me to make little embarrassing noises, but I was 100% sure that my brain was no longer functioning as it should be. All I could do was react, which in turn was making it harder and harder to find a reason to speak at all.

            When he sat up, I took the time to regain my breath, rolling over onto my back. He was looking down at me, and even though I had seen him with bed head multiple times before, it didn’t make it any less sexy. I had the urge to push him down and kiss him breathless, but then my eyes settled on the scratches that stood out against his pale skin.

            I bolted upright, running my fingers across a deep one that started at his left shoulder, and went down to the middle of his back. “D-Did I do this?”

            Levi gave the scratch a quick glance before his eyes moved up to my face. “I don’t mind.”

            “Do they hurt? They look like they do. Shit. I don’t even remember doing that. This is really embarrassing.”

            He gave me a crooked grin. “What _do_ you remember about last night?”

            “Uh,” I stammered, wishing he wouldn’t have asked me that, “well, I remember what we did, and that…” I trailed off, unable to go on.

            “And that?” he prompted, leaning in to kiss my neck.

            I breathed out, almost losing my train of thought. “And that it felt really…good.” This was _not_ the conversation I wanted to be having after our first night together. I’m pretty sure he knew how I felt about what we had done. I mean all he had to do was look at the evidence on his skin. I had been so far gone in pleasure, that I had unintentionally scratched him.

            “Did it?”

            My eyes darted to his in disbelief, but what I saw there stopped me from making my next remark. He looked insecure, uncertain. Did he doubt in himself that much? 

            Wrapping my arms around his neck, I straddled his lap. “It did. I wouldn’t lie to you about that.”

            “I know,” he said, resting his hands on my hips. “We should get dressed. Erwin has already sent someone up for us. He wants to discuss some things with me before I head back to the underground. I have to make sure my men know what’s going on, but I should be back within the next couple of days.”

            Knowing that he would be leaving later on today made me want to spend as much time with him as I possibly could. So, giving a little thrust of my hips, I said, “Let’s take a shower together.”

            A good while later, we dressed in a set of clothes Erwin had left for us with the doorman. He had given Levi casual wear, while I looked like a sad impression of some royal prince. It was by far one of the most ridiculous outfits I had ever worn, but it was clean, and that’s what mattered most—at least to Levi.

            He took my hand as we stepped out of the room. The second we were out the door, a burly man who equipped a large firearm directed us down the hall. We didn’t put up any type of resistance, just moved along until we reached a corridor that led us to a huge dining room. Sitting there at the head of the table was Erwin, who smiled wide when he noticed us entering.

            “Take a seat wherever you’d like.” He gestured to the empty chairs on either side of him. “After breakfast, I thought you and I could go into my study to further discuss my conditions, Levi.”

            “Yeah,” Levi said, pulling out a seat that was as far away from Erwin as the table allowed. He motioned for me to sit down and after I did, he took the chair right next to mine. “I couldn’t give two shits about your conditions. What I want to know is what you’re planning on doing with Eren once I’m gone.”

            At that, Erwin laced his fingers together, propping his chin up on them. “Absolutely nothing. He can roam my house freely until you’ve carried out your task.”

            “Is that so? Then what’s with the outfit you’re having him wear?”

            I glanced down at the white button down and black slacks. I had left the vest, suit jacket, and tie back in the room. There wouldn’t be a point in wearing them and I didn’t want to appease Erwin. Succumbing to his will was the last thing I wanted to do.

            “What’s wrong with the outfit I provided?” Erwin asked, eyeing me. “Though I see that some of the essentials are missing. Such a pity. The plum tie would have brought out the color of your eyes, which I must say are very beautiful. Much better than the gold you tried passing them off for last night.”

            Levi’s grip tightened around my hand and his jaw clenched as he spoke. “If you lay one finger on him, I’ll cut off both your hands.”

            Erwin threw his head back in laughter. When he recuperated, he said, “Oh, what a threat. But you don’t have to worry yourself. I won’t touch him. I gave him that outfit to wear, because I wanted him to look presentable in front of any guests I may have. If he’s going to be staying in my home, then he needs to uphold a certain appearance.”

            Even though the last thing I wanted was to look up to his class, I had to admit that this was a lot better than some of the other things I had been thinking of. Levi must have felt the same way, because he visibly relaxed, his fingers unclenching to rub soothing circles into the palm of my hand.

            “So,” Erwin piped up, “let’s eat.”

            Right after he spoke, two swinging doors behind him popped open and a young woman in maid attire came striding in with a serving cart full of different foods. From where I sat, I couldn’t make out her face, but when she turned around, I recognized her at once. It was Ymir, except her hair was no longer a deep red, but a dark-brown. She must have been wearing a wig last night.

            When she spotted me, her expression didn’t change. She simply picked up two plates at a time to lay them out on the tabletop. Once she was through, she excused herself and disappeared behind the doors she had come through earlier. So that’s how she had access to the masquerade ball last night, but what was her relationship with Krista?

            “Serving yourself,” Levi muttered. “That’s a shocker.”

            Erwin chuckled, his hand never faltering as he scooped some watermelon slices onto his plate. “Despite what you may think, I don’t like to be waited on hand and foot. There are things I still like to do by myself.”

            Levi made no further comments and I felt like I was caught in the middle of a tidal wave. There was nothing I could do but sit in silence and wait for one of them to say something else, but both of them kept quiet. Erwin seemed completely immersed in what he was doing, while Levi looked like he wanted to grab me and run, but I knew that wasn’t possible, so I had to do something, anything to stop this tension that was building up between them.

            Standing, I grabbed two plates and started shoveling food onto them. When there was enough on both, I sat back down and slid one in front of Levi, who looked down at the contents like they were contaminated.

            “Well, this doesn’t seem to be going well,” Erwin said, wiping his mouth with a linen napkin. “I’ve lost my appetite.” He pushed back in his seat, coming to a stand. “How about we just head to my study? I wouldn’t like to spend the rest of my morning like this.”

            Levi turned to me. “Wait for me back in the room. I’ll tell you everything once I get back, okay?”

            “Okay.”

            He kissed me on the forehead before he was up on his feet, striding out of the dining room with the man that I couldn’t quite figure out. I didn’t want to stay here any longer than necessary, so I quickly left, noting how there were no men following after me. They must’ve known that I wouldn’t leave under these circumstances, which aggravated me to no end.

            Erwin truly had us in the palm of his hand.

            As I rounded a corner, a hand shot out and clamped over my mouth. Before I could do anything, whoever was behind me dragged me into a small closet. When they released their hold on me, I whirled around, ready to attack, but it was Ymir.

            “What the fuck?” I bit out.

            She leaned back against the wall. “Shut up. You have no room to talk. If it weren’t for you, Krista wouldn’t be locked up in her room right now.”

            My eyes flicked to her leg. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

            “I know that,” she said, “but still, you’re a shit for what you did. Do you even realize how hard it is to walk normally with a fucking gaping wound in your upper thigh? It’s not easy, but it’s what I have to do, because Erwin can’t know about my involvement in last night’s affairs.”

            “He doesn’t know about you?”

            “Nope, and we have to keep it that way, too, because for some damn reason, Krista still wants to help you. There’s more to Erwin’s little plan that we don’t know about, but we’re going to change that.”

            “How?” I asked. “It doesn’t seem easy to figure this guy out. It wouldn’t surprise me if he knows about you and is just keeping quiet until the right moment presents itself.”

            She clenched her hands at her sides. “Listen, if you want to help, then keep your mouth shut and hear me out. Erwin isn’t planning for Levi to make it out of this alive. Kenny is dangerous. I think what Erwin wants to do is kill two birds with one stone. Get rid of them both at the same time, and keep you as a prize.”

            “Me?”

            “Don’t look so surprised. If you haven’t noticed, Erwin isn’t straight, and he likes the finer things in life. That includes beautiful boys with exotic eyes.”

            I wanted to vomit. If he even attempted to touch me, I would kill him. I wouldn’t stand for any of his games, and if it came down to me needing to find a way out of here, I would.

            “What’s the plan then? You obviously have one,” I said.

            Ymir pushed aside some stuff on a metal table behind her so she could lift herself up onto it. “We have to find a way to get a hold of Kenny. When he finds out what Erwin is up to, there’s no doubt that he will put an end to him, and then both you and your little boy toy will be safe.”

            She made it sound so easy, but judging by her expression, it would be anything but. “How do we contact him?”

            “Don’t know,” she said simply. “That’s why I said we have to find a way, and if we want to save your boyfriend’s ass, we need to do it as quickly as possible.”

            “Just tell me what to do then.”

            She sighed, letting her head fall back against the wall. “You won’t like it, but if we’re going to succeed in this, then you’re going to have to swallow that damn pride of yours and do it anyway.”

            I didn’t like the sound of that. “What do I have to do? Spit it out already.”

            “Seduce Erwin. Get him wrapped around your little finger.”

            My response to that was immediate: “Fuck that.”

            Even with an injured leg, she was quick, jumping down from the table to grab the collar of my shirt in the blink of an eye. She shoved me until my back made contact with the wall behind me. “Listen, you fuck. I don’t want to help you. If Erwin finds out about Krista helping you, there will be dire consequences, so I suggest you shut up and do as I say. If you don’t want to, then go ahead and sit back and watch Levi die.”

            I flinched at her words, knowing she was telling me the truth. There was no reason for Krista to go out on a limb to help me, yet she was, which could only mean that she knew the way things would turn out. If Levi carried out Erwin’s request, then he would die in the process. But how could I bring myself to seduce a man that absolutely revolted me?

            “Hey,” Ymir said, releasing me. “I know this entire situation sucks. I know you don’t want to do this, but if you go through with it, and you get Erwin to want you more than he already does, then that will make him weak and give us an advantage.”

            “I don’t even know where to begin. Levi is the first person I’ve ever been with. I don’t know how to be seductive.”

            She put her hand on my shoulder. “You won’t have to try hard. Use that body of yours. Krista and I know what stirs Erwin up.”

            I cringed. “Ugh.”

            “Yep. Now we have to get out of here. I’ve been gone for too long. I’ll snag you again tonight to touch base.” She reached for the door handle, looking back at me over her shoulder. “Stay in here for a couple minutes, then head back to your room.”

            “Yeah.”

            After Ymir left, I sagged down until I was sitting on the floor. Seduce Erwin. That’s what it came down to. It disgusted me to think about him putting his hands on me. I couldn’t deal with it, and if Levi ever found out, he would lose his trust in me. But it was the only thing I could do to help him, so I would do it whether I liked it or not.

            Several minutes passed by before I made my way out of the closet, and then I walked back to the Sapphire Room. I shut the door behind me once I made it inside, clenching my hands and hitting my forehead with them. Fuck! Fuck all of this! This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. We were supposed to get help from Erwin, so we could put an end to Reece, but instead we had made an even worse enemy.

            “Shit,” I muttered, collapsing onto the bed. “ _SHIT!_ ”

            Trembling, I ran the tips of my fingers along my lips, remembering last night. Levi and I had only been together once and now we were being torn apart. Somehow, this all led back to me. It hurt me to know the things I would have to do to keep Levi safe, but in the end, I was willing to do it. Maybe this was my punishment. Maybe I wasn’t allowed to be happy. But my happiness didn’t matter so long as Levi remained protected.

            By the time he came into the room, I had made up my mind. It would kill me to carry out Krista’s plan, but I would do it anyway.

            “Hey,” Levi said, lying next to me on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

            I shook my head, keeping my eyes shut. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him right now. “It’s nothing.”

            “Don’t lie to me.” He brushed my hair away from my face. “Look at me, Eren.” I forced my eyes open. “I know this situation has gone to shit, but I’ll fix it. I’ll go through with what Erwin has asked of me, and then I’ll get you out of here. Don’t worry about anything.”

            My heart clenched in my chest as pain overtook me. “I’ll always worry about you.”

            “Don’t,” he said, kissing the side of my mouth, killing me softly. “Everything will be all right. I won’t let Erwin hurt you.”

            “It’s not me he wants to hurt.”

            “I’ll manage.”

            I looked up at him, committing his face to memory. “Will you?”

            “Yes. Believe in me.”

            “I do,” I said. I believed in his abilities, but I also knew that Erwin was a mastermind and had already taken those abilities into account. If he wanted Levi dead, then he would achieve just that.

            “Then don’t worry.” He kissed me, looking into my eyes. “I’ll take care of everything.”

            I nodded, not trusting my voice, and then I looped my arms around his neck, drawing him closer to me. “When do you have to leave?”

            “Soon. Hanji’s coming to pick me up.”

            “When will you be back?” I asked.

            “I don’t know for sure, but it should be within a few days. Erwin wants to come up with a detailed plan before I make my move, but Hanji’s going to be swinging by every day to check up on you, so if Erwin tries anything, you tell her and I’ll come right away.”

            I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat, because it would be me that tried something. “Okay.”

            “Eren, are you all right? I don’t have to leave tonight. I—”

            I pressed my finger to his lips, managing a small smile. “I’m fine. We’ll get through this together, right?”

            “Right.” He kissed me then, and my entire body shook beneath him as the fear I felt settled in.

            I had never asked for any of this. The day I saved Isabel, I had snuck into the underground to buy some herbs to help my mom get better from a cold. But in the end, that one course of action had caused a domino effect that has led me here. The only good I had got out of this all was the man kissing me like he couldn’t stand the fact that he was going to have to leave me here tonight.

            The knock at the door broke us apart and Levi didn’t say good-bye as he got out of bed. He gave me one last glance before he slipped out and left me alone in my turmoil. The pain that shot through me was so intense, that I began to cry, but I let the tears fall. I would give myself this moment to feel it all, because come tomorrow, I would have to betray the love of my life.

            I don’t know how much time passed, but when I finally recovered, the door flew open, emitting a very stealthy Ymir. She gave me one look before she came to sit on the edge of the bed.

            “Do you need a minute?” she asked.

            “No.” I sat up. “Tell me what I need to do.”

            She sighed. “As much as we’re in a hurry, we can’t rush this. You’re going to need to take things slow. You can’t suddenly like him. That will cause him to be suspicious of you, and then we’ll have no hope of getting him to trust you.”

            “Then? How are we going to go about this?”

            “Ignore him,” she said. “He’ll go out of his way to try to get your attention and then you’re going to confront him. Let all your anger out. Afterwards, he’ll probably give you some shit apology and you’ll ask him for one thing. It can be anything really, but something big enough that you can pretend that he’s won you over a little. Then we’ll go from there.”

            I dropped my head in my hands. “Will he ever come to trust me enough to spill information about Kenny?”

            “No. But he’ll trust you enough to drop his guard a bit. That’s all we need.”

            “I’m not so sure about that.”

            “Do you have a better plan?”

            “No,” I admitted. “But if this doesn’t work out, then I’ll use what little trust I’ve gained to catch him off guard and kill him. Hell, I may do that anyway.”

            She glared at me. “That won’t solve anything. Erwin is the definition of thorough. If anything happens to him, he'll have a back up plan to account for his death. Why do you think Levi hasn’t tried anything?”

            “Because of me.”

            “Wrong. I don’t think you realize how much Levi wants to put an end to all this, but he knows Erwin well enough that he didn’t even attempt it. Why do you think that is?”

            I groaned, because she was right. There had to be a reason behind Levi not trying anything against Erwin. “This seems impossible.”

            “Our plan is the best bet, so get some sleep, because tomorrow is going to be one hell of a long day for us.”

            For me especially.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH, please don't hate me (and please no hurtful comments). I understand that this turn of events is less than favorable, but don't worry, I have it all planned out. I know that doesn't help you any, but shh, leave it up to me. Trust in me (all I picture when I say that is the snake in Jungle Book lol)
> 
> Buuuut, as per usual, thank you for the comments and kudos. I feel the love. ❤
> 
> If you would like to chat, or have any questions, you can find me on [Tumblr](http://warriorflesh.tumblr.com) and [Instagram](https://instagram.com/levi.eren_/) (I'm a lot more active on my IG, btw)


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to start this off by saying that the beautiful Rosanticis drew me fanart. You can see it [here](http://rosanticis.tumblr.com/post/113781293539/based-on-the-thug-over-on-a03). 
> 
> I fangirled over it for a good 5 years. OMG! I can't thank you enough for it. I was so overwhelmed with joy. Gah, excuse me while I go stare at it some more.
> 
> So go on and read. :)

Ignoring Erwin was proving to be pointless. Two days had passed and we weren’t getting anywhere. Not once did he try to reach out to me like Krista and Ymir assumed he would. He kept his distance, and seemed perfectly fine with me not paying any attention to him. Our plan of getting him to chase after me had failed miserably, so today we were moving on to plan B, which meant we were skipping straight to the game of seduction.

            Up in my room, Ymir held up a pair of dark-blue swim trunks for my observation. When I got an eyeful of them, she tossed them onto the bed, coming to stand in front of me. Then she cut me a sideways glance, eyes taking in my disapproving expression.

            “What?” she muttered. “I could have given you a speedo. Be glad that I chose something modest that will cover up your gross man junk.”

            I scowled at her, picking up the discarded swim trunks. “Do I really have to go swimming? We don’t even know if Erwin will be at the pool today.”           

            “He always goes to the pool on Tuesday’s.”

            “This won’t work,” I said, clamping my hands down on the material between my fingers. “I think it’s obvious that he isn’t interested in me sexually. If he were, he wouldn’t have gone the last two days ignoring _me._ ”

            Snatching the trunks out of my hands, Ymir motioned for me to stand up. After I did, she clutched the front of my jeans, yanking the fly open. “We won’t find out with you sitting around, now will we? So shut up and get these on.” She shoved the bathing suit in my face before striding out of the room, leaving me alone with a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

            Sighing, I undressed in silence and hurriedly put on the offending material that left half my body exposed. It shouldn’t have been a big deal to roam the mansion shirtless, but knowing what I was about to do made me feel like I was completely naked. I wanted to go back into the Sapphire Room and wait there until Levi returned, but instead I forced myself to keep walking until I came upon the double glass doors that Ymir had told me about earlier.

            The pool was indoors and before I even entered, I could make out Erwin’s large frame sitting on a lounge chair on the other side of the massive room. Lifting my hand up, I took hold of one of the door handles, but then my body froze and I stood there paralyzed. I couldn’t go in there. Everything in me was screaming for me to stop, to turn back around and approach this in a different manner, because betraying Levi was unacceptable.

            “Hurry it up,” Ymir hissed from beside me, startling me enough to make me jump up a little. I didn’t have to look to know that she was well hidden from view. “We don’t have all day.”

            “I can’t do it.”

            She exhaled long and hard. “Yes, you can. Get in there and swim like you were born a goddamn mermaid. Strut your stuff, and at some point in time, get out and shake your hair in that fucking ridiculous way actor’s do in movies.”

            I had to refrain myself from glaring at her—unless I wanted to give away her position. “There’s no way in hell that I’m doing that.”

            “Suit yourself, but get your ass in there already. Stop stalling.”

            Removing my hand from the handle, I said, “No. This can’t be the only way to go about this. I can’t, and _won’t_ , betray Levi. He means everything to me.”

            It took Ymir a moment to respond, but when she did, her words weren’t what I had been expecting to hear. “Fucking dammit, fine. I won’t make you do this. Just get back to your room. We’ll talk there.”

            I watched as she slinked out of the corner she had been hiding in, moving stealthily to disappear from sight. Then I sighed in relief, glad that I hadn’t gone through with something I knew I would regret. Levi trusted me, and in return had asked me to do the same, so that’s exactly what I was going to do. I was going to put my trust in him and tell him all about our plan.

            I was in the midst of turning around when the door behind me opened up. Caught off guard, I stumbled back, stopped by a powerful arm wrapping around my waist. My eyes flicked up to Erwin’s blue ones and I shoved against him, needing to get away, but he didn’t loosen his hold on me.

            “Planning to go for a swim?” he asked, his fingers roaming down my stomach to flick the drawstring of the swim trunks I was wearing.

            Appalled, I lifted my foot up to slam it down onto his toes, but he didn’t so much as flinch. “Don’t fucking touch me!” I dug my nails into his beefy arm, hoping he’d release me, but he didn’t budge.

            He chuckled low in my ear. “Oh, you’re truly feisty, aren’t you? A boy that can’t be controlled by anyone yet succumbs to the will of Levi. How interesting.”

            “Let go of me.” I gritted my teeth, lifting my foot up once again, but before I knew what was happening, he had me pinned up against the wall. “You fucker! If you don’t let me go, I’ll—”

            “You’ll what? Hmm?” he interrupted, keeping my arms restrained by my sides as he slowly lifted me up off my feet. My instinct was to kick him in the balls, but he raised his knee up to press it against my groin, causing me to snap my legs shut. “How did he do it, huh? How did he tame you, Eren? Or did he tame you at all?”

            I squirmed against his hold on me. “I’ll kill you!”

            “I have no doubt that, if I ever gave you the chance, you _would_ kill me. But you’ll never get that chance, Eren.” He leaned forward to run his lips along my jawline and it felt so wrong that I was overcome with nausea. “You’re not even afraid right now, are you? You’re angry, furious. That’s what I expected of you. You didn’t disappoint me.”

            “You fucking disgust me,” I snarled.

            “I’m aware of that, but I have more planned for you then you know, so this was a necessary act. You see, I needed to find out if your body would respond to someone else’s touch.” He rubbed his knee against me, scrutinizing my expression as he did so. “But you don’t react. That’s good. That’s very good.”

            I glared at him, confused. “You don’t make any sense.”

            He laughed, finally releasing me. “As of right now, I don’t need you to know why I’m satisfied with this outcome.” Stepping away from me, he readjusted his shirt and added, “Oh, and by the way, you and Ymir can stop having your little meetings. You’re fooling no one—especially not me.”

            With a grin on his face, he turned around and left me alone in the hallway. He had known about Ymir all along. I knew it! That meant he bugged the Sapphire Room and was listening in on our conversations from the very beginning. Shit. He knew about everything, which would explain why he had been thoroughly ignoring me from the start.

            I had to find Ymir to relay this information to her.

            Pushing off the wall, I ran toward my bedroom, hoping she would be in there waiting for me. Erwin hadn’t done anything to indicate that he would try anything against her, but then again, he was very hard to read. For all I knew, he could have already sent some of his men after her.

            Fuck. I should have followed my instincts long before today. There was something very wrong about this whole situation. Why had he waited so long to put an end to our secret meetings? And why had he said that me being unresponsive to his touch was a good thing? What in the hell was going on?

            When I made it back to the Sapphire Room, I threw the door open, moving inside to shut and lock it behind me. Then I whispered, “Ymir?”

            She appeared from the bathroom, eyeing me like I was stupid. “Why are you whispering? And what the fuck took you so long?”

            “He knows. He knows about everything.”

            “What?” Her eyes widened a bit before she shook her head. “Wait, tell me exactly what happened after I left.”

            I swallowed down a gulp of air. “I was getting ready to leave when he came out of the pool room and…touched me. He told me that he was glad that I didn’t respond to his touch. I don’t really know how to explain it better than that. None of this makes any sense, but he knows about our meetings.”

            She chewed on her lower lip. “He’s up to something, and judging by what you just told me, he’s planning on using you. I don’t know for what, but there has to be a deeper meaning for him being glad that you didn’t respond to his antics.” In a fit of rage, she leaned over and swiped her hand across the cheery wood dresser, knocking over a vase full of flowers that bounced unharmed when it hit the carpet below. “Goddamn him.”

            I opened my mouth to say something, but she stepped forward to slap her hand over my lips, keeping them shut. Then she jerked her head to the right, releasing me to stride over to the double doors that led out to a balcony that overlooked a hedge maze. I followed after her, not even questioning why we were going to sneak out of the room. Erwin could hear us in here, so we had to find a place that was away from the house—a place that we could speak in private.

            To my surprise, Ymir was as agile as a cat—hopping onto the railing before jumping down onto a platform that was so small it was almost nonexistent. When she leaped down to the ground below, she looked up at me, rolling her eyes.

            “Jump, you wimp,” she said.

            I flipped her off, and then hoisted myself up onto the railing. The platform stuck out just enough that I’d be able catch it if I lowered myself down. That’s how I was going to approach this, because if I tried to jump onto it like Ymir had, I was sure I would miss and fall. The last thing we needed was for me to break my leg attempting to show her up.

            Turning around, careful to keep my footing, I grabbed hold of the railing and leaned away from it until my legs dangled beneath me. I should’ve put a shirt on, because right now my chest and stomach were getting brutally treated, but I could worry about that later. Right now I focused my attention on placing my feet on the platform. Once I could feel the sturdiness of the platform beneath them, I let go of the railing and quickly turned around to hop down next to Ymir.

            “Took you long enough,” she said, arms folded over her chest. “My grandma could’ve done it faster.”

            I gave her an _oh-come-on_ look. “Just shut the fuck up and lead the way.”

            She smirked as she passed the entrance into the maze. I hoped that she knew her way around this thing, or we were going to be in here for the rest of the day. Either way, staying out here would be better than being up in that room where Erwin could hear my every move. Did he have cameras installed, too? I cringed at the thought. I really didn’t want to know, because if he did, he saw a lot of things that weren’t meant for his eyes.

            “How far in are we going to go?” I asked, needing to distract myself from my thoughts.

            Ymir reached her hand out to run it along the tall hedges. “Not far. My leg is killing me. I won’t be able to walk on it for much longer; not after that jump back there.” She glanced at me over her shoulder. “Thanks for that.”

            I sighed, feeling bad. “I already told you I’m sorry.”

            “I know. I’m just giving you a hard time, because I’m trying to sidetrack myself. I’m not kidding when I say my leg is killing me.”

            I picked up my pace to catch up to her, not hesitating to loop my arm around her waist to bear most of her weight on me. “Has anyone looked at it?”

            She wrapped her arm around my neck to gain her balance. “You mean like someone professional? Nope. I couldn’t let Erwin find out about my involvement in that whole shit fest on the night of the masquerade ball, remember?” She scoffed. “Even though my efforts were useless, because the bastard knew all along. Jokes on me.”

            “You probably need stitches. It was pretty deep, right? Damn. Have you at least disinfected it?”

            She shot me a glare. “Don’t go all mama on me. _Yes_ , I disinfected it. Do I look like an idiot?”

            “Do you really want me to answer that?”

            “Fuck you,” she said, smiling. “Turn here. There’s a bench that Erwin put up a couple years back. I need to sit down for a bit.”

            Helping her round the corner, I eased her down onto the stone bench until she released her hold on me, and then I sat down next to her, finally taking in her attire. She wasn’t in the usual maid outfit she wore around the mansion. Today she was in a simple pair of faded jeans and a navy-blue T-shirt.

            When she saw me staring, she said, “Today is my day off. I live here, down in the ‘servants’ quarters’.”

            I waited for a minute to see if she was joking, but when she remained serious, I murmured, “Erwin is taking this whole rich thing too far.”

            She shrugged. “When you’ve lived in poverty all your life, and one day you come into money, it tends to change you. Erwin doesn’t take all of this for granted. He remembers all too clearly how it felt to live in the underground, to starve for weeks at a time. That’s why he’s willing to do just about anything to keep his fortune.”

            “You make it sound like his fortune is being threatened.”

            “I’m beginning to believe that it is,” she said. “He’s taking this too far. Bringing Levi into his affairs is…odd for him. He normally doesn’t like anyone getting involved in his personal business. I thought it was strange from the start, but I still don’t know why he’s doing all this. If he really wanted to, he could take care of Kenny himself. He has the capacity to, so it doesn’t make much sense why he’s asking Levi to take care of his dirty work, and I’m not buying that he thinks Levi is the only one that can pull it off.” She dropped her head in her hands, sighing. “What am I not getting here?”

            I glanced down at her injured leg, noting the bulge beneath the fabric of her jeans. She must’ve tied something around it, but it needed to be looked at before it got infected. “We need to call Hanji. She can get Levi down here and also stitch up your leg.”

            “There’s one big problem with that suggestion: Erwin doesn’t have phones hooked up in the house. Krista got her cell phone taken away, so we’d literally have to ask him for his. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think he’d be willing to lend us a hand in this situation.”

            I groaned. “Can this get any worse?”

            “I know that was a rhetorical question, but yes it can. We have to go back in there eventually. It’s not like we can camp out here.”

            “I’m about to,” I admitted. “He has the room I’m staying in bugged.”

            “Just tell your boyfriend about that when he comes. He’ll cut off his dick for that.”

            “Good.”

            We lapsed into silence and I longed for time to speed up. It had already been two days and Levi still hadn’t returned. I needed him here. We had to tell him about everything we’ve learned, and how Erwin had touched me and bugged the Sapphire Room.

            Dammit! Why was I stuck here? And wasn’t Hanji supposed to drop by to check up on me? Right now was a good time to do just that.

            “Let’s get back,” Ymir said. “For right now, we can’t do much. It’s best to just go about the rest of the day like we would normally. I’m sure Erwin has plenty planned for me, but I’ll deal with that when the time comes.” She stood up and I reached up to grab her wrist. Her eyes lowered to my face. “What?”

            “You’re not alone in this. You’re helping me and I will do the same for you in return.”

            She stared at me for a long while before she nodded once. “Come on.”

            Standing up, I followed her out of the maze and back out into the spans of the backyard. I wasn’t ready to go back inside just yet, so I signaled for her to go ahead without me. Being out here alone would do me some good. After everything that happened today, I was in need of some time for myself.

            While I wandered around, I couldn’t help but think about Levi’s past and how Erwin had once been his leader. How was it possible to put so much trust in a man that had up and abandoned his people without a backwards glance? Was Erwin different back then? Did coming into money really change him that drastically?

            Kicking at a pebble that was on the cobblestone walkway, I looked up at the mansion before me. How could something material, something _temporary_ cause someone to forget about everyone they had once cared for? Did Erwin ever once consider how him leaving the underground would affect the people who depended on his leadership? Judging by how he was living his life nowadays, he didn’t care much for the men he left behind.

            As I was getting closer to the back double doors, they suddenly swung open and the last person I wanted to see came strolling out with a huge smile plastered on his idiotic face. I sneered at him, turning away and walking in the opposite direction. I should’ve known that Erwin would follow after me, but this time when he laid his hands on me, I was ready. I whirled around and brought my fist up, but at the last second he caught it in his own, effectively blocking my punch.

            “What the fuck do you want now?” I snapped. “I want to be left alone.”

            “All in due time.” He tugged at the sleeves of his suit jacket before he straightened the collar of his white button-down shirt. “I need you to go back up to the Sapphire Room to get changed. You can’t keep walking around shirtless.”

            I stepped away from him, putting space between us. “I don’t have to take orders from you.”

            He sighed, rubbing at his temples as though he were beyond annoyed with me. “For once could you just listen? Why do you have to be so troublesome? If you don’t want to go change willingly, then I’ll be more than happy to throw you over my shoulder and carry you up there myself. Is that how you want this to happen?”

            “Why do I have to get dressed? I’m going to be staying in the room, anyway.”

            “So you think,” he said, giving a quick glance at the gold wristwatch he wore. “Hurry along.”

            “Fuck off.” I walked passed him, making sure to bump into his arm along the way.

            When I was back in the house, I quickly made my way up to the Sapphire Room, locking the door behind me. Once I was alone, I grabbed a plain white T-shirt and blue jeans. I wasn’t going to be dressing up to Erwin’s liking. I wasn’t his little toy to play with.

            After getting dressed, I sat down on the edge of the bed, throwing myself back onto it. I wasn’t hungry. Erwin always sent one of his men to come fetch me for dinner, but I wouldn’t be joining him today. Normally I did, because it gave me the opportunity to see Krista and Ymir, but I doubted that would happen tonight, not after he admitted that he knew about our secret meetings.

            I was falling asleep when the knock at the door came. I rolled over onto my stomach, burying my face in the pillow in front of me. “Go away!”

            To my surprise, I heard the door open up. I lifted my head up to see Erwin standing in the doorway, holding up a silver key.

            “What the hell do you want?” I said.

            Instead of giving me an answer, he came toward me before turning around to face the door once again.

            What was he doing now?

            “Come in,” Erwin bellowed, waving his hand at someone that I couldn’t make out from where I lay. I sat up, wondering who he could be calling in here. “This is the boy I was telling you about. What do you think of him?”

            A tall man came walking in, taking in his surroundings before his small, piercing eyes came to settle on my face. A smile upturned his lips as he kept his gaze on me, and then he removed the bowler hat that he wore to bow in a sarcastic manner. When he straightened up, he said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

            “I can’t say the same,” I said bitterly. “Who the hell are you?”

            Instead of being taken aback by my tone and rudeness, the man seemed pleased. “You can call me”—he smirked, moving closer to the bed—“Kenny.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh, Erwin is a sneaky bastard, let me tell you. I will be explaining his little plan in the next chapter. Yes, he's an asshole. 
> 
> But this is my first cliffhanger in this fanfic. I congratulate myself, because in my last fic, I had so many cliffhangers. xD They just happened. 
> 
> Anyway, before I ramble on and on, thank you for reading and leaving me precious comments. I read them all and I'm so sorry for not getting back to all of you. Work has been a bitch lately, which is why it has taken me 5 days, yet again, to update. Ugh, forgive me.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I managed to update faster than I have for the last two chapters! YES! I had a lot more time this week, which made all the difference. My writing skills suffer when I'm rushed, so I'm happy to say that this chapter isn't total trash lol. Not that any of you said that my writing was bad in the last chapter, but I know I could've done a lot better, which sort of makes me sad.
> 
> I'm getting off topic. As usual. 
> 
> So go on and read! :D

I stared at Kenny for several seconds that stretched on to feel like hours. Then, when I snapped out of my initial shock of learning who he was, I bolted out of bed, only to be stopped by Erwin’s quick reflexes. His large arm snaked around my waist, preventing me from going anywhere. He held me close to him, lifting his hand up to run his fingers through my hair.

            “He has quite a temper,” Erwin said with a slight chuckle, still petting my head with soft strokes, treating me as if I were his pet.

            It sickened me.

            Kenny put his hands on his hips, leaning forward to stare into my eyes. “So I see. Can’t say that I disapprove of it, though he will need to learn some manners.”

            “Of course he will. Why don’t you go on down to the dining room for now? I’ll be right there with you after I speak to Eren.”

            Kenny smirked, straightening up to his full height. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t keep me waiting for too long. You know I hate that.” He left the room without another word, shutting the door behind him with a definite _click._

            Erwin didn’t waste any time in turning me around to slam me back down onto the bed. He crawled over me, placing his knees on either side of my hips. Then he wrapped his hand around my neck, staring down at me with a look I couldn’t fathom.

            “Earlier,” he said, “I told you that I had more planned for you. This is it. Kenny has a taste for young boys like you—boys that can’t be easily controlled, boys with haughty tempers. You see he and I came upon an agreement a few weeks ago. In exchange for my freedom, I had to give him you. It wasn’t easy, at first. But after I learned of Levi’s plan, everything became clear to me. He left you here thinking I would cause you no harm, because he truly believes that I need him to take care of Kenny. Little does he know that I just needed him out of the way.”

            I glared at him, gritting my teeth in anger. He never needed Levi at all. His entire plan had relied on Levi believing in him. Erwin had manipulated the both of us, and now there wasn’t anything I could do to escape his clutches, but that didn’t mean that I wouldn’t try. I would fight until I couldn’t fight anymore.

            “You bastard!” I shouted, thrusting the heel of my hand up into his throat.

            “Do you think this will get you anywhere?” He seemed completely unfazed by my attack, moving his hands up my arms to pin my wrists up above my head. “I’m a lot stronger than you, but I’d rather not waste any more time restraining you. After tonight, you’ll be leaving with Kenny and all my troubles will go with you. Of course I’ll have to deal with Levi, but that shouldn’t be too hard. After all, Reece is more then willing to help me and he won’t be thinking clearly after he learns what I did with you.”

            Using all my strength, I pushed my arms up, trying to break his hold, but he held fast, watching my attempts at escaping with amusement in his eyes.

            “Had enough?” he asked.

            I went to move my leg, but he was quick to restrain it under his own. “You selfish piece of shit! Does living in this mansion make you that happy to betray everyone who trusted you? The people who you abandoned without a care would have willingly laid down their lives for you and you don’t even care.”

            “You’re quick to judge me because you haven’t lived there for very long. Tell me, Eren, have you felt hunger pains so strong that you can’t even get out of bed? Have you ever done things—unspeakable things—to get food? You haven’t, have you? You don’t know the things that I’ve done throughout my life to survive, the things that I _saw_ down there. Yet you sit there and have the audacity to tell me that what I’m doing is selfish.”

            “It is,” I said. “Levi would never abandon his people for money.”

            He chuckled, leaning back a bit to brush a strand of hair out of my eyes. “Perhaps not. But he would abandon them for you. He’d leave them all behind for your sake.” He kept quiet for a moment and then chuckled. “You have nothing to say? How rare. Or is it because you know it’s true?”

            “Shut up!”

            “It’s a shame that you had to be the one that caught Kenny’s eye. I honestly would have preferred it to be anyone else, but you have that spark that he likes so much. It also doesn’t help that you are Levi’s.”

            “So that’s it?” I said. “You’re just going to hand me over to Kenny without batting an eye? And what is he going to do to me?”

            He released my wrists to get off the bed. After he straightened his shirt, he responded with: “Anything he wants.”

            Without acknowledging my presence, Erwin strode over to the door, grasping the door handle with a firm grip.

            As he pulled it opened, I said, “You’re the worst kind of person.”

            He went stiff, shutting his eyes for a brief moment before exhaling a drawn out breath of air. “Perhaps you’re right.” He stepped out into the hallway. “Be down in the dining room within the next few minutes, or I’ll send some of my men to come and fetch you. Let’s not let it come to that.”

            After he left, I pulled my knees up to my chest, burying my face against them. Even if I managed to get out of the Sapphire Room, there was nowhere I could go. Erwin had men stationed everywhere. There was no chance of me getting into contact with Levi before the night ended, and Ymir had probably been detained by now.

            “Fuck,” I mumbled.

            Unhooking my arms, I slid off the edge of the bed, refusing to accept any of this. Even if I couldn’t get away, I wasn’t about to do any of this willingly. I’d fight tooth and nail to give Erwin the hard time he deserved. I was going to prove to him that taking me down wouldn’t be an easy task.

            Unlocking the doors that led to the balcony, I stepped out into the cool night. There was no time to be careful, so without hesitation, I lifted myself up onto the railing, taking in a deep breath before I leaped down. My feet barely landed on the ledge of the platform below. When I was steady, I jumped down, running into the maze the instant my feet were on the ground.

            I didn’t know my way around this thing, but getting lost would be better than dining with Erwin and Kenny. They could go fuck themselves, if they thought that I was going to bend to their will. I wasn’t about to sit down and look pretty while they discussed their deal to kidnap me. The last thing I wanted to do was satisfy either of them.

            I’d make Kenny regret choosing me.

            Running, I winded through the many twists and turns of the maze. When I was out of breath, I sunk down to my hands and knees, wishing, against all reason, that someone either than one of Erwin’s men would find me out here. Maybe Ymir hadn’t been caught. Maybe she was searching for me right now. With her help, I had a better chance of escaping.

            But I was all alone out here, and the only sound I could hear was my ragged breathing. There was no one I could call for help, and going back to the mansion meant Kenny getting his way. But how long would I be able to stay hidden in the maze before someone came searching for me? Erwin was probably already fed up with waiting and had sent up one of his men to the Sapphire Room.

            I sighed, sitting back on my heels to tilt my head back to gaze up at the sky. It was dark out here and I could make out so many stars. They were so clear, no city lights to obscure their shine.

            “Levi,” I whispered, a feeling of loss and pain accompanying the sound of his name.

            Would I ever see him again?

            The sound of footsteps snapped me back into the present and I stood up in one fluid movement, preparing myself for anything. Whoever it was, they were going to have a hard time catching me. I wouldn’t give in to anyone.

            Several minutes later, a dark figure appeared a few feet away from me. I couldn’t make out who it was, but when they didn’t say anything to me, I took several steps back, ready to run.

            “Stay still,” they whispered. “They’ll hear you.”

            I dropped my hands, easing up from my fighting stance. “Krista?”

            “Shh. They are coming. We have to move.” In a flash of movement, she was at my side, taking a hold of my arm to prompt me to start running. I fell into step with her, following her down another long passage.

            “How did you manage to get out of your room?”

            She gave me a sideways glance. She was dressed in a black jumpsuit that clung to her body like a second skin. “Ymir. She was able to get one of the other workers to let me out. I’ve been hiding for the last three hours.”

            “How is that even possible? Hasn’t Erwin sent anyone to come check up on you?”

            “Apparently not. Do you mind filling me in on why that is? The only reason I saw you come into the maze was because I was hiding in the maintenance shed out back. There are several of Erwin’s men after you. It was a miracle they didn’t spot me, but there has to be a reason that they’re coming after you.” She took a sharp right turn and I skidded as I followed after her.

            “He’s been lying this whole time,” I explained. “He never wanted Levi to help him. He wanted him out of the picture, so he could bring Kenny here.”

            She looked confused as she registered this new information. “Bring Kenny here? But why?”

            “Because Kenny wants me, and in order for Erwin to hand me over to pay his debt off to him, he had to get Levi out of the way.”

            Silence ensued and we kept on running. I didn’t know where she was leading me, but I trusted her enough to not ask any questions. It’s not like it mattered much, anyway. Escaping this place would be tough whether she chose to betray me or not. Though I didn’t think she was the type of person to side with Erwin on anything—especially this.

            “It makes sense,” she finally said. “Although I have no idea what debt he would have to pay off to Kenny. He has plenty of money to settle any dispute they may be having.”

            “I think Kenny has some kind of control over his money. At least that’s what it seems like to me, because Erwin said in exchange for me, Kenny would grant him his freedom.”

            She shook her head, stopping in front of one of the tallest hedges that made up the maze. “I don’t care to know the reason.” She bent down, pushing her arm through the leaves and branches. I watched her move her hand about until a look of satisfaction lit up her eyes, and then she stood up straight, clutching a phone in between her palm and fingers. “A few weeks back, I had Ymir hide a cell phone out here. That’s when Erwin sent one of his men to go spy on Levi. I wanted her to put it here for safekeeping. I suppose it came in handy. Here.” She tossed it to me. “Call Hanji, and make it quick. We can’t stand around forever.”

            “Got it,” I said, catching the cell. I dialed Hanji’s number, glad that I had it memorized. I listened to the other end ring and ring, and when it went to voicemail, I hung up and tried again, only to get the same results. “She’s not picking up.”

            Krista walked toward a large square pot that harbored an outdoor plant. She hoisted herself up onto it, looking back at me. “If you boost me up, I can make it over the top. You’re tall enough to get over it by yourself.”

            “What’s on the other side of the maze?” I asked, shoving the cell phone into my pocket to step up next to her. I knelt down as best I could, interlacing my fingers so she could use my hands as a makeshift step.

            As she slid her right foot into my hand, she said, “More of the backyard, but if we keep going, we’ll reach a brick wall. If we can make it over that wall, we’ll be off Erwin’s property. It’ll take a while to reach the main part of the city, but that’s something we can worry about afterwards.”

            “Yeah.” I boosted her up, watching her scramble over the top of the hedge. She was light enough that it barely dipped under her weight, but what I was worried about was how she was going to get down to the other side.

            “There,” she said, sitting on the top. “It’s a bit of a ways down, but I know how to land without causing any harm to my ankles. Do you?”

            I shook my head. “I’ll manage fine, though. Go on.”

            Bracing herself, Krista jumped off the hedge. I listened for her landing and waited for her to give me some type of indication that she was all right.

            “Your turn,” she said just loud enough for me to hear.

            Pushing up the sleeves of my shirt, I moved my left leg over the top, making sure it was steady before I raised myself up onto the hedge. When I was settled, I looked down, noting that it was a good drop. If I injured my leg, I would hold Krista back and wouldn’t be able to help us get out of here.

            “Don’t put any weight on your ankles,” Krista advised. “When you land, quickly roll forward so that your weight is taken off of your legs and evenly distributed throughout your body.”

            “Sounds easy enough.” I knew it wasn’t, but I wanted to relieve some of the uneasiness I felt.

            Moving my hands to either side of me, I readied myself for impact, and then hopped off. Wind rushed passed me as I descended, and then my feet hit the ground, but the second they did; I rolled forward as I was instructed to do. To my surprise, I managed to land unscathed.

            “Get up,” Krista said. “We have to put space between us and Erwin’s men. It shouldn’t take them long to figure out that we’re no longer in the maze.”

            I rose to my feet. “Let’s go.”

            From where we were, I could see the brick wall she had been talking about earlier. It was too tall to make it over. We would have to find something to climb up onto if we were going to stand a chance at all. Considering how much stuff was in the backyard, it shouldn’t be that hard. Krista must’ve known that if she suggested this.

            “What about Ymir?” I asked as we ran. She was still back at the house, and that alone made me want to turn back around. She had helped me in so many ways, yet I was leaving her behind. “Will she be safe?”

            “Yes. She’s been a staff member of Erwin’s for the past three years. There are too many people that know about her for him to kill her. He’s just going to discipline her, but I know she can handle that—not that I like the idea of him laying his hands on her, but I haven’t been given much of a choice.”

            Worrying about Ymir wouldn’t do her any good. Once I made it out of here in one piece, then I could devise a plan that would get her out and away from this damn mansion—away from Erwin. The man was nothing but trouble and I doubted he would let us get away with any of this, but I couldn’t focus on that yet. I needed to pay attention to what was happening right now if I wanted to get out of here.

            “We’re almost there,” Krista announced, speeding up. “Look for anything we can use as a step.”

            I scanned the areas around us, but saw nothing that could be used. It made me wonder if Erwin had planned for this ahead of time, or had simply seen this as something that could happen and removed anything that could be of any use to help anyone scale the wall. Whether this was his doing or not, there was nothing out here that would get us over it.

            When we came upon the blockade, Krista turned around to face me, putting her hands on my shoulders. “I’ll boost you up,” she said.

            “No. I wouldn’t be able to reach down far enough to help you up.”

            “That doesn’t matter. Right now I’m in no immediate danger, but you are. If Kenny gets his hands on you, that’s it. So stop thinking about it and come on already. You’re wasting time we don’t have.”

            Unable to meet her eyes, I nodded, waiting for her to lace her fingers together. Then I placed my foot in her hands, ignoring the need to stop. She was right. Erwin wouldn’t bring her any physical harm, but if Kenny took me away tonight, there would be no more hope for me. So this was what I had to do, even if it went against everything I believed in.

            Krista was surprisingly strong for being so petite. She had no problem lifting me up high enough for me to be able to grab the top of the wall. When I had a good, steady hold, I lifted myself up, throwing my leg over to ease my way into a sitting position.

            “Go,” she called from below me. “Once Erwin’s men know that you made it over, they’ll come after you. If you know of anyone else you can call that can give you immediate assistance, then do so without hesitation.”

            “Okay. I’ll…” How could I tell her that I didn’t plan on leaving her and Ymir here for much longer? I wouldn’t allow Erwin to keep them trapped in his mansion against their will. “I’ll come back for you.”

            She smiled. “I know. Now go.”

            Shifting so that now both my legs were on the other side of the wall, I flipped around onto my stomach, gripping the ledge to slowly ease my way down as far as I could go. Then, I released my hold, hoping against all odds that I wouldn’t sustain an injury when I landed. But when my feet hit the ground, my right ankle took most of the weight and bent at an unusual angle that sent a shock of pain throughout my leg.

            “Shit,” I hissed, collapsing onto my knees.

            Taking one look at my ankle confirmed that I had twisted it. I wouldn’t be able to apply much pressure to it, but I could still walk on it if I was careful. Even though I would be slowed down, I still had to get up and go as far away from here as I could. If I stayed put, Erwin’s men would easily track me down.

            Standing up, I ignored the bolt of pain that made me grit my teeth together. My ankle was in agony and more so with each step I took, but I forced myself to make it down the dirt path that led me through a dense forest. Hopefully I wouldn’t come across any wild life. If that were to happen after I succeeded in making it out of Erwin’s mansion that would be something else.

            As I got further and further away from the brick wall, I dug my hand into my pocket, pulling out the cell phone Krista had given me. With how my ankle was, there was no way that I would be able to make it to the underground before Erwin’s men caught up to me. I had to contact someone that could help me.

            Dialing Hanji’s number once again, I held the phone to my ear; listening to the endless ringing that told me she wouldn’t be answering. If I couldn’t get ahold of her, then I was going to have to try someone else, and the only person that came to mind was someone that I trusted completely, but didn’t want to get involved in all this mess. But if I didn’t call him, I would be dragged back to the mansion, and I couldn’t stand the thought of that happening, so I punched in the number that I knew by memory.

            The other end rang two times before I heard a soft, “Hello?”

            I breathed out a sigh of relief, almost laughing with it. “Armin.”

            “E-Eren…is it—is it really you?”

            “Yeah.”

            I heard a muffled sob, followed by a sniffle. “I thought you were dead. Where are you? What happened? Your mom…”

            “I have a lot to explain,” I said, “but right now, I really need your help. I’m in trouble. I can’t even begin to tell you how much trouble, but I’m going to need you to trust me for now. Can you do that?”

            “Of course I can. You’re my best friend, Eren. Just tell me what you need.”

            I stopped to rest my leg, leaning up against the trunk of a pine tree. “I need you to come pick me up. I have a sprained ankle. I can’t walk on it for much longer.”

            “Tell me where you are,” he said right away. “I’m already heading to my car. Just tell me where to go and I’ll be there as fast as I can.”

            I shut my eyes, smiling. “God, I’ve really missed you.”

            “I could say the same about you, but we can talk about that once I get there. Tell me what I need to know.”

            I nodded, even though I knew he couldn’t see me. “There’s a mansion at the edge of Trost. I’m behind it. It looks like I’m in a forest, but I don’t know how close I am to the main road. I’ll keep on walking until I get there.”

            Armin exhaled. “I hope you’re okay. You don’t sound it, but I think I know what mansion you’re talking about. I’ll be there soon. I’ll call you once I reach that area, okay?”

            “Okay.”

            “And Eren?”

            “Hmm?”

            “Don’t disappear again.”

            I laughed. “I’ll try not to.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally get to bring our blonde baby into this fic--after 21 chapters. *sobs* But at least he's here now, right?? Yes!
> 
> Anywho, I can't thank you guys enough for all the nice comments and feedback you've given me thus far. I can honestly say that I wouldn't keep writing if it weren't for the nice souls I've met in this beautiful fandom. So, thank you. (Yes, I'm going sappy. Please forgive me.)
> 
> But, once again, thank you for reading and commenting. ❤


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me six days to update. UGH. U to the G to the H. I was planning to update this last night, but then my internet picked the perfect (horrible) timing to go out and by the time it was fixed, I got a call from my mom telling me that my older sister was going into labor. So today was a loooong day, and I'm ready to go to bed. It's almost six in the morning here and I haven't been to sleep yet.
> 
> I'm rambling. Anyway, I hope you like this chapter. :)

By the time I reached the main road, my ankle was in agony, but that didn’t matter to me, because I had made it. Relieved, I sagged to the forest floor, pulling out Krista’s cell phone from my back pocket. Armin told me he would call when he was nearby, so I could be ready to get into his car.

            I had to believe that everything would work in my favor from here on out.

            Sitting back, I stretched out my legs in front of me, slipping my hand underneath my right knee to coax it up toward my chest. Then, I took hold of the bottom of my pant leg, rolling it up to reveal my ankle. I only had to take one look to see that it had swelled to twice its normal size, and when I ran my fingers across the bulge, it hurt like hell. It wouldn’t surprise me if I wouldn’t be able to walk on it for weeks to come.

            As I examined my injury, Krista’s cell phone vibrated against the palm of my hand. I glanced down at the screen before I answered it.

            “Armin? Where are you?” I asked.

            “I just turned onto the street behind the mansion.”

            I smiled, moving onto my knees so I could come to a stand. “I’ll be by the side of the road.”

            “Eren, when you said you were in a lot of trouble, does that mean you’re in danger?”

            The smile vanished from my face. “Listen, the less you know, the better. It’s for your own safety.”

            “So it’s as I thought: You’re not going to tell me anything.”

            I sighed, walking forward as best I could. My ankle was no longer cooperating with me. It had dealt with enough of my shit for one day. “A lot has happened, Armin. Things will never be the same for me, and if I get you involved, they won’t be the same for you either. I wouldn’t have called you tonight, if it wasn’t my last option, because mixing you in this mess is the last thing I want to do.”

            The other line stayed silent for a long while, and then Armin surprised me when he began to laugh. “You haven’t changed one bit,” he said. “You’re always taking everything upon yourself when there are so many people willing to help you. I know that you don’t want me to get involved, but that isn’t your choice to make. For the last several months, I thought my best friend was dead, and now I have you back. Do you really expect me to let you go again?”

            “It’s not that simple—”

            “I can think for myself. If things were switched around, and I was in your position, you wouldn’t let me deal with this alone. So stop arguing with me.”

            If I hadn’t seen his headlights in the distance, I would have done just that. I knew that he wanted to help me, but he didn’t know what he was getting himself into. Once he dropped me off near the underground, I would lose contact with him and that was for the best. He couldn’t be in my life until everything had been taken care of.

            But would that ever happen?

            “You’re almost to me,” I said, opting to change the subject.

            “Yeah, I see you.”

            I hung up, tossing the cell phone over my shoulder. If I kept it on me, Erwin would be able to track me down, and I couldn’t risk him catching up to me before I made it back to Levi.

            A few minutes later, Armin pulled off to the side of the road beside me. He rolled down his window, and I drank in the sight of him, wishing that I could see him as often as I used to. I really had missed him, but given the situation I was currently in, seeing him after tonight would be impossible. 

            “Do you need help?” he asked, already opening his door.

            “I’m fine. I got it.”

            He stepped out of his car anyway, rushing over to where I stood. I let him slip his arm around my waist to help me walk around to the passenger side. “You’re not fine. What exactly have you been through these last few months?”

            I didn’t give him an answer right away, instead easing myself into the passenger seat after he opened the door for me. “It hasn’t been all bad.”

            Despite everything that had happened to me since the day I saved Isabel, there were a lot of good things that had come into my life. I had found Levi, and that in itself was worth every second of agony I had endured at the hands of our enemies. I couldn’t even imagine my life without him.

            “You’re not just saying that, are you?” Armin asked, looking me in the eyes.

            I shook my head, smiling. “No. I met a lot of good people.”

            “Well, at least you got something out of all this.” He leaned back to shut the door, and I watched him round the hood before he got back into the car. When he was settled in his seat, he asked, “Where am I taking you?”

            I didn’t want him to take me directly to the underground. That was far too risky for him for my liking. I’d have him drop me off a couple of streets away, even if that meant I would have to walk on my sprained ankle the rest of the way to Levi’s house. But that would be my problem to deal with, and I wouldn’t think about it until the time came.

            “Sina Street,” I said.

            Armin gave me a dubious look, but nodded his head in understanding. Then he put his car in drive and did a U-turn to go back the way that he had come from. While he focused on the road ahead, I allowed myself to relax a little. The walk through the forest had left me exhausted.

            “I’m not taking you to Sina Street,” Armin murmured after a few minutes passed by.

            I sat up straight, wincing when my ankle brushed against my leg. “You have to.”

            He turned his head to look at me. “I don’t have to do anything. You’ve been gone for months. Your mother was murdered. Do you think me and Mikasa just sat back and did nothing? We knew something wasn’t right, that you were hiding something from us. So we didn’t believe the police officer’s who told us you were dead.”

            “What are you talking about?”

            “I’m saying that we looked for you, Eren. We didn’t have any leads, but that didn’t mean we gave up. When we couldn’t find you in Trost, I hacked into your Verizon Wireless account and looked at the calls you made the day of your disappearance.”

            I racked my brain, but couldn’t remember if I had called someone or not. Even if I had, I doubted that it would lead them to me in the underground.

            Wait! Levi had asked to borrow my cell phone the day Reece showed up at my house to threaten my mom. Who had he called? Obviously it was someone that would link me to the underground.

            “And?” I prompted.  

            “And that’s how I found Hanji. She was reluctant to give me any valid information at first, but after Mikasa and I went to her house, she was a little more willing to talk to us.”

            “So you knew where I was this whole time? If that’s the case, then why did you say that you thought I was dead?”

            He let out a long breath. “Hanji didn’t tell us everything. She only told us that you were alive and living in the underground. She said if we wanted updates on your well being, that we’d have to keep our mouths shut about the information she gave us. We were all right with that, but we were furious when one of her conditions was that we could in no way contact you, or let you know that we knew where you were if you ever contacted us.”

            “Then why did you tell me all this?”

            “Because,” he muttered, pounding the steering wheel with his fist, “she promised us that you wouldn’t get hurt! She broke her end of the bargain, so why should I hold up mine?”

            I took a moment to absorb this new information. They had known about my whereabouts this entire time and hadn’t called the police. Also, Mikasa hadn’t just randomly showed up in the underground. Knowing her, that’s the first thing she would have attempted. So why didn’t she?

            There was more to this that Armin wasn’t telling me.

            “If you’re not taking me to Sina Street,” I said, “then where exactly _are_ you taking me?”

            He turned onto the highway, avoiding my question for several minutes before he finally relented. “Hanji’s house. I figured since she knows all about your situation, that she should be able to help you.”

            “Okay, that’s fine with me. But right after you drop me off, I want you to leave. You can’t stick around for long.”

            His grip on the steering wheel tightened and an expression of anger settled on his face. I had never seen him like this before. It was like he couldn’t control his emotions, which was unusual for him. Normally he didn’t have any trouble keeping calm in any given situation—he was always the voice of reason in our group.

            “Why?” he asked, keeping his eyes on the road.

            I sighed. “I can’t tell you why.”

            “Eren, do you trust me?”

            “Yes.”

            “Then let me help you. I don’t have to come along with you everywhere, but please tell me what’s happening. There has to be a way that I can help you. Stop leaving me in the dark.” When we stopped at a red light, he dropped his head forward. His next words left him in a whisper. “Do you even know how painful it was to lose you? We’ve been friend’s since we were kids, Eren.”

            I reached over to put my hand on his shoulder, hating how he was hurting over me. “I’m sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen.”

            “I know, and that’s why I’m determined to set things straight. You won’t even be able to graduate with Mikasa and me now. I know that’s probably the last thing on your mind, but whatever you’re going through is gradually ruining your life.”

            Graduation, huh? It was true that school had never once crossed my mind. With everything I was dealing with, I didn’t have time to linger on things that could’ve been. None of that mattered anymore, and as much as I wanted to change that, I couldn’t. Everything I had experienced had changed me. Even with Erwin and Reece out of the picture, I didn’t think I would be capable of returning to Trost.

            “I’m in love with someone,” I blurted out. “I know you think that what I’m going through is horrible, and in so many ways it is, but I found someone. I don’t want to return to Trost, to live out my life like none of this ever happened, because it did.”

            The light turned green, but Armin didn’t take off. He sat there staring at his hands, which were bunched up on his lap. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. To him, a big part of his daily life had been torn away from him—for me, as well. But unlike him, I didn’t want everything to go back to the way it was before I had met Levi. Still, that didn’t mean that I didn’t want him in my life.

            “Armin,” I said, “I want to graduate. I still want to do all the things we planned to do together, but I can’t act like everything is normal.”

            He nodded slowly, bringing his hand up to wipe at his eyes. “I understand.”

            After that, we stayed quiet.

            Even though it hadn’t been my plan to go to Hanji’s, it wasn’t a bad idea. She could drive me to the underground and Armin could stay far away from it. Once I was with Levi again, we could decide what our next step was. Reece wasn’t our only foe now. We had Kenny and Erwin to think about.

            “What are they like?” Armin asked, filling the silence. “The person you’re in love with, I mean.”

            I grinned. “Remember the stories we heard about the strongest thug in the underground?”

            His head whipped in my direction. “Levi Ackerman? _That’s_ who you’re with? Mikasa is going to flip when she finds out.”

            “I have no doubt about that.” I laughed, because I could just envision her reaction. Damn. I had been so caught up in my problems that I had almost forgotten how much I missed the both of them. “He’s not a bad guy, though.”

            “I’d like to meet him some day, if that’s all right with you.”

            “Of course it is.”

            He smiled. “We’re almost to Hanji’s house.”

            Though this day had brought with it terrible news, I was glad that I had been given the chance to spend some time with my best friend. When he was gone, I would be forced to see how things really were, how I was wanted by Kenny, how Erwin would do anything to get his hands on me to pay off his debt and keep his fortune.

            “Here we are,” Armin announced, pulling into the driveway of a two-story house. He turned his head to look out his window and his fingers tapped restlessly at the steering wheel. “No matter what you say, I can’t just sit back and do nothing for you. I will find a way to help you, Eren. This isn’t going to be the last time we see each other. I need my best friend back.”

            I didn’t feel like arguing with him, so I just nodded and then slowly got out of his car. I limped up the walkway that led to Hanji’s door, hoping she was home. Earlier, she hadn’t answered her phone. She could be busy with something else. Actually, now that I thought about it, it was strange how she had never dropped by Erwin’s mansion like Levi said she would.

            Mulling over this, I rang her doorbell, listening for any indication that she was home. After a couple of minutes ticked by, I lifted my hand up and knocked on the door. She had to be home. If Armin didn’t see me go in, he would insist on taking me somewhere else.

            Just when I was about to try the doorknob, the door swung open. Hanji took one look at me before she slammed her hand down onto my shoulder, pulling me into the entryway. Then she shut the door behind us, yanking out her cell phone from her front pocket.

            I opened my mouth to say something, but she slapped her hand over my lips, shaking her head.

            “Now where did I leave that?” she said, immediately ending the call with whomever she was speaking to after that.

            Grabbing my wrist, she attempted to drag me forward, but I only took two steps before my ankle gave out beneath me. When I collapsed, Hanji glanced down at me and I pointed to my injury. She wasted no time in scooping me up into her arms, walking through her kitchen to get to the garage.

            Setting me down near her car, she opened up the back door, all but shoving me into the backseat. I didn’t even have time to ask where we were going before she was backing out of the driveway. When we were far from her house, she finally spoke.

            “Erwin bugged my house,” she said. “He wouldn’t let me come visit you. When he didn’t, Levi came up with a plan to go and get you, but it seems you saved us the trouble. Judging by your ankle, I’m guessing that getting out wasn’t easy.”

            “It wasn’t, but that’s over and done with. Where are we going?”

            She blew a red light, making me reach for my seat belt. “A hotel. For now, that’s where we’ll be staying until Levi comes and gets you.”

            “How will he know where we are?”

            “Remember that phone call I made back at the house? I called him. A couple of days ago, I gave him an old cell phone of mine, so that we could keep in contact with each other.”

            “So when you said ‘Now where did I leave that?’ you were telling him to go to the hotel you guys picked out?”

            She nodded. “Yes. Since Erwin bugged my house, we had to come up with a catch phrase that sounded natural.”

            For the rest of the drive, we didn’t talk. Today had stretched on to feel like a small eternity and I was beyond exhausted at this point. There was too much to think about and I just wanted to shut off my brain for the rest of the night.

            When we reached the hotel, which wasn’t anything fancy, Hanji helped me out of the car. She thoroughly ignored the stares we got as we made our way to the front desk, and didn’t even spare a glance at the clerk when she told him what kind of room she wanted to rent for the evening.

            After she paid, we walked to the nearest elevator to get to the third floor. By now, my whole body was in desperate need of rest. I could only hope that it wouldn’t take Levi long to get here, because I wanted to see him. I needed to hear his voice after a day like today. I had to have confirmation that everything was going to be all right—even if it was a lie, because everything was adding up and we were only two people; two people against an army.

            When the elevator arrived at our floor, Hanji and I headed straight for our room. Once we were inside, she led me to the bed, instructing me to sit on the edge of it. I did as I was told, watching her lift up my leg to examine my ankle.

            “At least it’s not broken,” she said, “though it’s one hell of a sprain. I’m going to go grab some ice for it. Do not, under any circumstances, get up. If someone knocks on the door, you wait until I get back. Understood?”

            “Yes.”

            “Good. I’ll be right back.”

            As soon as the door closed behind her, I threw myself back onto the bed. Why did I have to hurt my ankle? This put me in a position that I didn’t want to be in. There was no way I’d be able to fight with this injury, and I would have to wait until it was healed before I could be of any help to Levi. He was going to have to handle things on his own for several weeks, which royally pissed me off.

            Fuck Erwin. Instead of providing us with weapons, like Levi had hoped he would, he had only added to our problems. How were we going to proceed from here? We wouldn’t be safe in the underground because of Reece, and now, if we stepped foot in Trost, we ran the risk of Erwin tracking us down.

            While I thought of all this, Hanji slipped back into the room, carrying a small bucket of ice. She went into the kitchenette to fetch a hand towel, and then came to kneel in front of the bed, dumping several ice cubes onto the towel she had laid out beside her. When there were enough to satisfy her, she lifted up the bundle of ice and pressed it to my swollen ankle.

            “Hey,” she said, waiting for me to look at her to continue, “don’t think about anything for tonight. For right now, all you need to focus on is getting a night’s sleep, okay?”

            “Yeah.”

            I bolted upright when someone began to hammer on the door right after I spoke. Hanji stood up in one fluid movement, ambling to the door to pull it open. Levi didn’t waste a second to shove her out of the way, quickly crossing the space between us.

            “Are you hurt?” he asked, his eyes roaming over every last inch of my body.

            “Just my ankle.”

            His gaze wandered down to said ankle and an expression of sheer hatred contorted his facial features. “I’m going to kill him.”

            “I’ll help.”

            “No you won’t,” he said. “After tonight, we’re going to use what money we have to get you out of Trost. Once you’re gone, I’ll take care of Erwin.”

            “It’s not just Erwin,” I informed him. “It’s Kenny, too. And if you think I’m going to allow you to dump me miles away from here, you’re wrong. I’m not going anywhere. This involves me too.”

            He grabbed my chin, coaxing my face up. “This has nothing to do with you. Erwin wanted me to take out Kenny, but that’s not going to happen anymore—not after what he did.”

            “That’s not what I meant.”

            “Then explain yourself.”

            I dropped my eyes. “Erwin was planning to give me to Kenny tonight to pay off some debt he owes him. That whole thing about him wanting you to take care of his dirty business was a lie. He just wanted you gone, so that I could be alone in his house, because he knew you wouldn’t leave me any other way.”

            Levi’s jaw muscle twitched as he clenched his teeth. “That bastard is going to die, and soon, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re not staying here.” He pointed to my ankle. “That will take weeks to heal. We don’t have weeks.”

            “You can’t do this alone. I won’t let you.”

            He sighed, cupping my cheeks to press his lips to my forehead. “I won’t be alone, so don’t worry about that.” When I didn’t say anything, he leaned back to peer at me. “Don’t give me that face. My mind is set.”

            “I’m going to run to the store real fast,” Hanji said, interrupting our conversation, but I knew that she just wanted to leave us alone. “Eren is going to need a brace for his ankle and I doubt there’s any food in this damn hotel.”

            Levi turned to her. “If you’re followed, call me.”

            “Will do, short stuff.” With that, she left the room.

            Falling back onto the bed, I threw my arm over my face, festering. How could Levi plan to send me away at a time like this? Even if I _was_ injured, that didn’t mean he had to get rid of me. I was just as involved in this as he was.

            “Don’t sulk,” he said, crawling over me.

            “I’m not sulking.”

            “Yes you are.” He leaned in and I could feel his warm breath on my neck. “I’ve died a thousand deaths in these last few days. Not knowing how you were was something I couldn’t handle, Eren. That’s why you can’t stay here, because when you’re with me, I’m weak.”

            I lifted my arm up, looking at him. “But—”

            “No ‘buts’. Like I said earlier: My mind is made up. Now stop moping, because I need you to be here with me in the present.”

            “I am here with you,” I said.

            “Then don’t think about anything else.” He ran his hands up my stomach and chest, leaving a trail of opened-mouth kisses along my neck. “Just think of me.”

            I always thought of him, so that was why I was going to find a way to stay with him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry. This isn't the last we've seen of our blonde coconut. Armin isn't about to listen to Eren when it comes to this. He will be back!
> 
> GAH, I'm too tired to write more. So, thank you for reading!


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 11 p.m. here. I wanted to update on Eren's birthday, but I guess that's not happening. But still, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EREN! You precious baby. (It's the 30th in other countries anyway)
> 
> I'm a bit sad that I couldn't really write a birthday special, because it wouldn't fit in with the plot of the story, but this is a happy chapter. There's no way I could've written a depressing chapter so close to our babe's birthday.
> 
> So go on and read! :)
> 
> (FYI: SMUT WARNING! hehe)

Even though I had been exhausted, I only managed to sleep for a few hours. I woke up to the sound of Hanji’s snoring. She had taken up residence on the tan chaise chair pressed up against the foot of the bed. As I sat up, I saw that she was spread out on it, one leg hanging over the side. How she could sleep so comfortably like that, I would never know.

            Lifting the comforter up, I slipped my legs out from beneath it, grasping onto the headboard with one hand to ease myself up onto my feet. Carefully, I walked to the bathroom, putting as little weight on my injured ankle as possible. I couldn’t risk making it worse.

            Before I pushed open the door that led to the bathroom, I turned around to look at Levi, who was still lying fast asleep on the bed. In the light of the moonlight, I could make out his face and I smiled in the darkness. There were too many questions I could ask as to why we were facing so many problems when we hadn’t done anything to bring them on, but there wasn’t a point to dwell on things I couldn’t answer. I had faith that, if we stuck together, we could get through everything we were up against. That’s why I had to convince Levi to keep me here by his side.

            Stepping into the small room, I flipped on the light switch and was bathed in a white light that took me a moment to adjust to. Once I did, I gazed at my reflection. My hair was sticking up every which way, thick locks falling over my eyes. I sighed, noting how my complexion had grown a bit pale. Had three days at Erwin’s mansion caused this? I had to admit that I hadn’t eaten much while I was there, and rarely slept for more than a couple of hours a night, but still, I didn’t think it would have this affect on me.

            I chuckled, shaking my head. I wasn’t invincible, which was something I needed to get through my head.

            Undressing, I stepped into the tub, leaning down to turn on the water. When it was warm enough, I switched on the showerhead, stepping into the cascade of warmth that soothed the aches in my limbs. But despite the fact that I was here, safe in this hotel room, I couldn’t relax.

            Levi wanted to send me away. I knew why, but it still frustrated me. From the very start, I wanted to stand side by side with him as his equal. How would I ever be able to do that if he kept pushing me away?

            The sound of the door opening and closing interrupted my thoughts.

            I stood still, trying to hear anything over the sound of the shower running. “Levi?”

            Instead of giving me some type of response, he pulled aside the shower curtain, gazing at me with a softness in his eyes that reminded me that I was his first love. He wanted to keep me safe at all costs, protect me from anything and everything. He thought that in order to do that, he had to keep me far away from Trost and the enemies that threatened to take me away from him. But couldn’t he see that I was capable of handling my own? That I wanted to protect him as much as he wanted to protect me?

            “Hey,” he said at last, leaning up against the wall. “How’s your ankle feeling?”

            I looked down at it. It was now deeply bruised and was as big as a tennis ball. “Better.”

            “Liar.”

            I shrugged. “It’ll heal.”

            He was getting wet, and it surprised me that he didn’t step away from the droplets of water that bounced off the tile wall and hit him in his face. Stepping forward, I ran the pad of my thumb over his closed lips, watching him react to my touch. His eyes were hooded, his long lashes downcast, but I heard his breath catch in his throat, and something inside me woke up.

            It was painful looking at him, knowing that our days together were numbered. It had been like that since the moment I met him. There had always been obstacles in our way, and I was getting tired of it.

            “Stop pushing me away,” I said softly. “I want to fight alongside you. I want you to be able to depend on me. Making me leave Trost won’t solve anything. Can’t you see that?”

            His eyes moved up to lock onto mine. “Before you came into my life, I managed—”

            “Stop right there. You keep saying that: ‘before you’ this and ‘before you’ that. This isn’t before me, Levi. I’m here now, and here is where I’m going to stay, because I don’t belong hundreds of miles away from you. I belong right here, by your side.”

            He stared at me for a long time, and at one point he opened his mouth as if to say something, but no words ever broke the silence that had settled between us. Finally, with a sigh, he said, “Finish up your shower. We have a lot to discuss with Hanji this morning.” He turned around to walk away, but I wasn’t about to let him leave when this was still unresolved.

            Reaching out, I snagged the back of his shirt, using it to pull him back, uncaring that I was stretching out the fabric. “You keep doing this, like I’m some fragile bird that you want to lock up.”

            He turned around, but kept his eyes on the floor. “How could you say something like that? I’m only trying to protect you.”

            “I know that,” I said. “So why can’t you understand that I want to do the same for you? All I want is for you to stop treating me like I’m incapable of helping. What happened last night has everything to do with me, yet you want to fight _our_ battles on your own? Look at me.” Reluctantly, he met my gaze head on. “We can do this together.”

            Silence came over us like it was a physical being and I could feel him slipping away from me, putting up walls between us, because he would rather ruin what we had between us, then put me in danger. But I wasn’t going to let that happen. I wasn’t going to let him slowly tear us apart.

            Placing my hand on his cheek, I said, “Before I met you, I always felt alone—even amongst my closest friends, because there was something that separated us. After I lost my dad, it was like an invisible barrier had been put up around me and I didn’t dare let anyone in. I didn’t want to think about losing anyone else, so I protected my friends with every fiber of my being. But with you, it’s different. With you, I feel safe. With you, I can let my guard down.”

            “Eren—”

            “I love you, Levi. You broke down that invisible barrier around me without even trying, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let you put it back up.”

            For a second, I thought he was going to continue to resist, but then he let out a sigh of defeat and said, “Fine. We’ll find a safe place to stay until your ankle is healed, and then we’ll figure out a way to go about this together.”

            I smiled wide, so happy that I completely forgot that I was in a wet tub. I would’ve slipped and fell on my ass, if Levi hadn’t reached out to steady me, getting the sleeves of his shirt wet in the process.

            “Just get in,” I said, not waiting for him to agree before I grabbed the hem of his shirt, yanking it up and over his head.

            He rolled his eyes at me, but continued to undo the belt from around his waist, pushing his jeans down until they pooled at his feet. “You didn’t stay mad for long.”

            “Huh?” My eyes darted to his face and I gave him a wicked little grin. “Why should I? We came to an agreement and I haven’t seen you for the last three days. I don’t want to waste any time being angry. Plus, how could I possibly stay mad at you when you’re standing in front of me naked? I mean, you have to put two and two together, baby.”

            He playfully shoved my shoulder. “Shut up and move aside.”

            I did as he told me, stepping sideways so he could climb in next to me. Then I wrapped my arms around his neck, leaning down a bit to press my lips to his. “See, this is nice.”

            “Yeah. Now tilt your head down.”

            “Mkay.” I angled my head down, and Levi reached over to grab the bottle of shampoo Hanji had bought on her shopping trip yesterday. He squirted some onto his hand, lathering it up in between his palms before he worked it into my hair. I relaxed under his gentle touch, looping my arms around his slim waist. “I want this—you and me—for forever.”

            He chuckled. “Was that a proposal?”

            “Yeah, let’s grow old together. I’ll tell tales about how you were once an infamous thug in the underground, but now, in your old age, you’re reduced to having someone else wipe your ass.” To my surprise, he busted out laughing, and I looked up in a hurry, wanting to see his face. It was so cute that I grinned at him like an idiot.

            “I see my toilet humor has rubbed off on you,” he said when he recovered.

            “Maybe a little.”

            He kissed me, and then leaned back to whisper: “I could do forever with you, kid. Now rinse out your hair. The water is starting to get cold.”

            After we washed up, we quickly got out and dried off, but as we did I remembered that the spare clothes Hanji had bought us were still out in the room.

            “Let me go get our clothes,” I said, wrapping the towel around my waist just to have Levi take it right back off. “What are you doing?”

            Giving me no response, he grabbed my hips, using his hold on them to lift me up and sit me down on the edge of the sink. I stared at him in confusion for half a second before I realized what he was getting at. I shook my head, eyes going wide. Then I pointed to the door, desperately trying to convey my message.

            “Hanji,” I hissed.

            “What about her?” He leaned down, leaving a trail of kisses along my inner thigh, breaking my concentration. His lips felt so soft against my skin.

            I bit down on my bottom lip, trembling under his ministrations, but still determined to put a stop to this. “She’ll hear us.”

            “Your point is? If she’s smart, she’ll avoid using the bathroom until we’re done.”

            “L-Levi, wait.”

            He sucked hard on the junction of my thigh and hip, stealing away any words of protest I was going to say. “You don’t want this? Well, I suppose it can’t be helped.” He went to move away, but I twined my fingers in his hair, keeping him in place. “As I thought. Now start cooperating.”

            “You’re the worst,” I grumbled, not meaning it.

            He raised an eyebrow, keeping eye contact with me as he continued to kiss every inch of my thigh. When his lips neared the spot I wanted him to touch the most, he leaned back a bit, sliding his hands beneath my knees to spread my legs apart. I put my feet on the cool surface of the counter, embarrassed that I was completely opened to his viewing.

            “You, um…why,” I fumbled, unable to go on.

            “Don’t be self-conscious.”

            “How can I not be? You kind of have me on display here.”

            He smirked, leaning down to nip at my inconveniently exposed ass. “I want to see you. And I need you this way in order to do this.” He pulled my cheeks apart and I let out a sound that could’ve been passed off as someone dying of a heart attack, but it quickly turned into a loud moan when Levi pressed his tongue to my entrance.

            My head snapped back, and my fingers slid into his hair to grasp handfuls of it. I couldn’t stop the noises I was making, so loud and desperate. It was embarrassing to be reacting so shamelessly, but I couldn’t help it. It felt so good, and with each lap of his tongue, I became more unraveled. The heat coursing through my body was intense and I just wanted to melt into it.

            My mind was so clouded with lust that I barely registered Levi leaning to the side to retrieve something from on top of the counter. It was a small bottle of oil that I was pretty sure was Hanji’s, but I couldn’t care less, not when he was pouring some into the palm of his hand.

            With slick fingers, he entered me, gently pumping until I was squirming with each beckoning movement. I needed more, and with this thought burning a place in my mind, I began rocking my hips forward, taking his fingers in deeper until they rubbed against my prostrate. My whole body shuddered and I cried out, moving my hands down to grasp onto his shoulders for leverage.

            “Levi. Levi,” I chanted his name like it was the only word I knew.

            When his fingers left me, I forced my heavy eyelids open to look at him. He appeared just as desperate as I felt, and when the head of his cock pressed against the tightness of my entrance, I wrapped one hand around the back of his neck, pulling him into a deep kiss.

            He began with shallow thrusts, slowly working his way into me, but I wanted him inside me now. So I reached down and dug my nails into his ass, jerking his hips forward forcefully, pushing him deeper and deeper.

            “Fuck,” he groaned, stilling the movements of his hips.

            “No, don’t stop. I—”

            He didn’t allow me to finish, cutting off the rest of my sentence as he began to thrust into me with reckless abandon. I gave up any hope of controlling my reactions long ago, so the unrestrained moans and cries that spilled from my lips didn’t surprise me. I didn’t even care if anyone heard us anymore, because I was too lost in the pleasure that Levi was creating.

            Lifting my legs up, I positioned my calves on his shoulders, seeking the perfect angle…

            _Fuck! Yes!_

The tip of his cock brushed against that spot inside me with each thrust and it was driving me crazy. I couldn’t take much more. My resolve was beginning to crack and even more so when I felt his hand wrap around my swollen length. All it took was a couple strokes for me to come undone completely.

            I screamed out, shaking with my release, and Levi kept stroking me, kept moving inside of me until I couldn’t hold myself up anymore. But he kept me upright, looping his arm around my waist to steady me, and even though my limbs were heavy and I was exhausted, I forced my eyes open.

            Looking at him, at the expression of pleasure when he reached his peak, intoxicated me.

            I would never get enough of him.

            Afterwards, as we regained our breath, I leaned up to wrap my arms around his neck, resting my cheek on his shoulder. We stayed like that for a while, clinging onto each other until the insistent knock on the door broke us apart. I immediately tried to jump off the counter, but Levi’s tight grip on my waist stopped me from moving.

            “She won’t come in,” he said, pulling out of me. “And you can’t hop down when you have a sprained ankle. Just wait here. I’ll go get a clean washcloth and our clothes.”

            Once he wiped himself off as best he could, he left the bathroom, quickly shutting the door behind him. If I hadn’t been so tired, I would have rinsed off in the shower, but I couldn’t even think about moving. My legs probably didn’t even work.

            Wow. That was embarrassing.

            When Levi came back in, he walked to the sink and turned on the faucet. He put the white washcloth he had in hand beneath the torrent of water until it was soaked, and then began to clean me up. I ran my fingers through his hair all the while, smiling when he made a sound of content.

            “Hanji went to go pick up Isabel and Farlan,” Levi said. “Last night I instructed them to leave the underground without telling anyone. There are only a certain amount of my men that I trust completely. Until we find out who Erwin’s spy is, this is how we’ll have to go about things.”

            I sighed. “Erwin’s a dick. I don’t see how he was once your leader.”

            Levi set aside the washcloth, putting his hand on my hip. “He was a lot different back then. When he left the underground without a word, it surprised all of us. But the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. He never enjoyed the responsibility that came with being a leader.”

            “That’s no excuse to abandon his people.”

            “For him it was,” he said. “But none of that even matters anymore. Despite everything that happened after he left the underground, I never wanted him as my enemy. In a way, I understood why he left. But now that he’s hurt you, there is no going back. I won’t be satisfied until he’s dead.”

            I slowly climbed down from the sink. “How do you know Kenny?”

            Levi’s eyes shot up to meet mine. “That’s not something I want to discuss—at least not today.”

            “Why?”

            “It’s a long story, but if Erwin was willing to hand you over to him, then that confirms that he doesn’t care about anyone but himself, and that makes him dangerous. Kenny…” He furrowed his eyebrows in an expression of anger and hatred, and then his hand shot out to the side. A loud smacking noise sounded as he punched the wall. “I don’t even want to think about the things Kenny would have done to you if you were with him right now.”

            I ran my hands down his back in a soothing motion, hoping to calm him down. “Don’t think about that. I’m not with him. I escaped and now we’re together. That’s all that matters, right?”

            He let out a long breath. “Yeah. Let’s go get dressed.”

            By the time we were decent, the others had arrived. The second Isabel came into the room, she made a beeline to where I stood, throwing herself into my arms. I stumbled back, a shock of pain shooting through my ankle, but I ignored it.

            “Hey,” I said, laughing. “It’s nice to see you too.”

            Her grip around my neck tightened. “Shut up. I was so worried about you. I thought Erwin was going to hurt you—that filthy, ugly bastard. I’m going to twist his nipples off.”

            “It’s fine. I’m okay.”

            She leaned back to look at me, flicking me in the forehead. “Don’t ever worry me like that again.” Her eyes narrowed as she scrutinized my expression. “Why do you look so happy? You’ve been through hell. Hanji told me that you hurt your ankle escaping that bastard’s house. So what’s up with that smile…” Her eyes popped open. “OH MY GOD! DID YOU AND LEVI HAVE SEX?”

            “I-I… What are you talking about?”

            She let go of me, jumping up and down. “You guys did! Ah, just get married already! I’ll be your flower girl.”

            Farlan walked up to her, putting his hands on her shoulders. “Uh, Isabel, that’s a private matter.”

            “Private!” she shouted. “No, you don’t understand. I am _invested_ in this relationship. Eren makes Big Bro so happy. I need them—”

            Farlan lifted her up into his arms, giving me an apologetic look as he carried her out of the room. I sagged in relief when they disappeared behind the door. I had almost forgotten how Isabel could be with things like this, but I couldn’t bring myself to mind. It was nice to have her and Farlan here. They were Levi’s family, and now they were mine, as well.

            “Well,” Hanji said, clapping her hands together, “we have to get going. Where we’re going is two cities down. There’s a town house you guys will be staying in until you’re all healed up, Eren. It’s under my friend’s name, so there’s no way Erwin will be able to track you down. So”—she turned to Levi, who was standing a few feet from me—“shall we get going?”

            He nodded. “Let’s head out. The sooner we’re out of Trost, the better.”

            “Fine by me. I’ll go check out.”

            Levi took my hand. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

            I moved closer to him, lacing our fingers together. “When we come back to this city, we’ll be ready. Together.”

            “Together,” he confirmed.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I needed this chapter. After everything that happened, and everything that's going to happen, our boys needed a little time for themselves. 
> 
> Stupid Erwin.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading! Also a special thank you to those that congratulated my sister. She had a baby boy. And if you're birthday is coming soon: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I love you! ❤


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sigh* I'm sorry it took me quite a while to update. I've been going through a tough time recently, so I really didn't have any motivation to write. I'm doing a lot better now, so hopefully next update will happen a lot sooner.
> 
> Also, I wanted another peaceful chapter. You can say that this is the calm before the storm, because as you know, a lot of shit is going to go down soon. 
> 
> So, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. :)

As our time at the town house was coming to a close, I decided that I was going to make the most out of the last couple of weeks we spent here. Once we returned to the underground, I didn’t know what would happen to any of us, so I wanted to take advantage of these peaceful moments together, because, for all I knew, they could be our last.

            So, on a Saturday morning, I had Hanji drive me to the nearest store. She didn’t know why I wanted to go, but she didn’t ask any questions as we got out of the car in front of Bed Bath & Beyond. There was something in specific I was looking for and Farlan had told me that they carried it here. If they didn’t, I would have to go to another store, because I was determined to get it.

            “What are we looking for?” Hanji asked as we stepped through the automatic doors.

            I grinned. “A Roomba.”

            Her face lit up. “You are the absolute cutest boyfriend in the world. Levi is going to love it. You’re getting it for him, right?”

            “Yeah. Farlan told me he’s been wanting it for the longest time.”

            “He has, though he’ll try to act like good old fashioned sweeping is the best method for cleaning.” She grabbed my hand, tugging me through the store until we made it to the vacuums section. “I can’t wait to see his face when you give it to him. Or are you going to give it to him in private?”

            I hadn’t really thought about it, but I wanted some alone time with him. For the past few weeks, he had been planning for our return, making arrangements with Erd, who was one of the only people in the underground who knew of our whereabouts. So far, him, Auruo, and Gunther were the only ones we could put our complete trust in.

            “I was thinking of giving it to him in private,” I said.

            Hanji smiled, throwing her arm over my shoulders to pull me against her. “You’ll probably get some action for this, but we’re going to have to get him a top brand. I’ll pitch in some money.” I gave her a face, but she waved it off. “Don’t refuse my offer. I won’t even give you a choice, so let’s pick one out.”

            I turned toward the items on the rack, running my fingers along the boxes. There were a lot to choose from, but most of them were pretty high in price. Even so, it didn’t matter to me. I still had some money left over from what my mom had left me in her bank account, and I knew she wouldn’t mind if I spent it on someone that I loved.

            “How’s this one?” Hanji asked, pulling a box off the shelf. “It has a 4 ½ star rating.”

            “It’s seven hundred dollars.”

            She slid the box under her arm with a grin. “Don’t worry about the price tag. I’ve got your back.” I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could get a word out, she grabbed my hand once again, lugging me down the aisle. “We should get a gift bag. Come on.”

            Half an hour later, I was holding several bags in my hands as we made our way back out to her car. She hadn’t even taken the money I offered her, instead putting it all on her credit card. I couldn’t believe she had done that for me. Before I left the town house, I would find a way to pay her back.

            “Do you want something to drink?” Hanji asked, opening the trunk up for me. “I feel like coffee. Yeah, let’s stop by Starbucks.”

            “I’ll pay for my own drink.”

            She waggled her eyebrows at me. “We’ll see. Now get in the car.”

            After we stopped at Starbucks, Hanji drove us back to the town house. When we pulled up in front of it, I saw that Levi and Farlan were out on the front porch. Once I caught sight of him, my heart fluttered in my chest. It was always like that when I was with him and I was surprised that the feeling hadn’t dulled down since our first meeting.

            I hoped it never would.

            The second Hanji parked the car, I threw my door open, stepping out onto the driveway. But before I could even make it to the trunk, Levi was at my side. I smiled at him, blushing fiercely when he slid his hand beneath my shirt, rubbing circles on the small of my back.

            “Where did you go?” he asked, moving closer to me.

            “Um…”

            “I asked him to come along with me on a little shopping trip,” Hanji provided as she opened up the trunk. She pulled out all the bags, mouthing, “I’ll leave it in your room.”

            I nodded, and then I took Levi’s hand to keep his attention away from her. “Let’s go inside. I’m a bit hungry.”

            “Have you eaten today?”

            “No.”

            He gave the back of my head a soft smack. “You need to eat. If you don’t keep up your strength, I’ll leave you here while I go back to the underground.”

            “That’s not going to happen,” I said. “I wouldn’t let you leave me behind even if I was as thin as a stick.”

            As we walked into the house, we were confronted with a sobbing Isabel. She ran right up to me, throwing her arms around my neck. I stared at Levi wide-eyed, but he just shook his head in response, and then jerked his chin in the direction of our room. Did he want me to go talk to her about something that happened while I was out? I had to assume that that’s what he was wanting of me.

            “Hey,” I said. “Let’s go into my room to talk, okay?”

            She leaned back while nodding. “Yeah, okay.”

            I led her down the hallway, preparing myself for what was about to come. I tried to think of any reason she could be acting this way, but my brain was drawing a blank. What could have happened while I was gone? Did she get into a fight with Farlan? That could explain her sudden outburst. He was the only one that could draw this type of reaction from her.

            When we reached my room, I pushed the door open, letting her go inside first. She instantly went over to my bed, throwing herself down onto it. I followed after her, sitting next to her lying form to rub her back soothingly.

            “What’s wrong?” I asked.

            She turned her head to look at me. “I give up.” That’s all she supplied me with and that wasn’t much to go on.

            “On?” I prompted.

            “On Farlan.” She rolled over onto her back. “He’ll never see me as anything more than a little sister and I’m done with it. We still have two weeks left here and I’m going to find a boy in that time. I don’t care who it is. I’m determined to lose my virginity, because once we’re back in the underground, everything is going to go to shit.”

            “You don’t know that.”

            She looked at me. “Eren, even if we make it out of this, do you know how many people are going to die? Tons. I could lose my family, so before that, I’m going to have my way with some hot kid.”

            I wanted to reassure her that everything would turn out okay, but I couldn’t guarantee that, so I kept quiet. There were a lot of things that could happen when we went up against our enemies, and she was right, we were going to lose a lot of people in doing so. Still, that didn’t mean she had to run off and get with the first boy she came across. She was just upset about Farlan.

            “I won’t let you do that,” I said. “You’ll end up regretting it.”

            She scooted off the bed, standing up. “Like hell I will. I can’t sit here and go about things like we have nothing to worry about. I’m not just some normal high school girl looking for a crush, Eren. I’m on a time scrunch.”

            “Even so, you shouldn’t go off and hook up with some random kid. Sex isn’t just about pleasure, Isabel. Do you really want to give yourself to someone who doesn’t even love you? Who may not even respect you?”

            For a long time, she stood there with her back to me, and then she let out a sigh of defeat. “I hate this. He won’t even give me the time of day. You would think that he would at least hear me out, but no, he won’t even do that. It’s like he doesn’t want to accept that I see him as more than just a friend.”

            “Or maybe he’s scared of letting you reveal your feelings to him.”

            I’d seen the way he looked at her. I didn’t know why he hadn’t tried making a move on her, but I knew that his feelings towards her were more than just a little friendly, and maybe that’s why he was holding himself back. I knew him well enough by now to know that he would want her to have the best, and that he didn’t consider himself that for her.

            “What are you saying?” Isabel asked, turning around to face me.

            “He really cares about you. He knows that you want to get out of the underground, and that there’s no way you’ll be able to do that if you stick around with him.”      

            Her eyes narrowed in contemplation before they widened. “Oh, my god. You’re right! All I’ve ever done is complain about living in the underground, and how I want to get out of there the first chance I get. Of course! It all makes sense now.” She ran over to where I sat, throwing her arms around me. “Thank you. I’m going to make him listen to me whether he likes it or not.”

            “Well, go on. He’s outside. Probably moping about.”

            She kissed my cheek. “Okay, I’m going. I’ll let you know how it all goes.” She darted out of the room without another word and I collapsed back onto the bed. It was only a few seconds later that the door opened up again.

            “Did you forget something?” I asked, sitting up, but it wasn’t Isabel.

            Levi crossed the room to come sit next to me, handing me a mug of tea. “So you convinced her to go talk to him?”

            “You knew what this was all about?” I took the mug he offered me, smelling the leafy scent of his favorite black tea.

            “Yeah. I’ve known about it for a long time.”

            “So,” I started, “does Farlan have feelings for her?”

            He took a sip of his tea before answering me. “Yes.”

            I smiled wide, wanting to go relay the news to Isabel, but I was sure that she would know soon enough. At least I hoped she would. “Do you think things are going to work out between them?”

            “I’m sure they will. If there’s anyone I trust with Isabel, it’s Farlan.”

            I nodded in agreement, lifting the mug up to my lips to take a drink of tea. To my surprise, it was sweet. Levi had added sugar for me, which was a shock. Usually he tried to convince me that tea tasted better without adding anything to it. “It tastes good.”

            He clicked his tongue. “I might as well just serve you sugar next time.”

            I laughed, setting the mug down on the bedside table. Then I took his, placing it next to mine. “I bought something for you.”

            “Is that so?”

            “Mhm.” I stood up, walking around the room until I found the gift bag Hanji had placed beside the dresser. Picking it up, I went back over to him. “Here.”

            He took it from me, not meeting my eyes as he sat it down on his lap. With no expression, he opened up the bag, a look of surprise taking over his features for a couple of seconds before he recovered and his look of nonchalance returned. He pulled the Roomba out, a dusting of pink covering his cheeks.

            He was blushing and it was the cutest thing ever. I would never be able to see it enough in my lifetime. It was a rare sight.

            “What do you think?” I asked when he remained silent. “You’ll be able to use it a lot more once we go back home.”

            Setting the box down next to him, he turned to face me, leaning forward to kiss me softly. I knew that this was his way of thanking me. He wasn’t good at expressing himself with words and preferred to use small gestures of appreciation like this. I didn’t mind whatsoever, so long as he was happy with what I had given him.

            “That place won’t always be our home,” he whispered. I leaned back to gaze at him. “We’ll leave that place one day. Now give me your hand.”

            “Huh?” Instead of waiting for me, he picked my left hand up, sliding something onto my ring finger. I stared down at it in bewilderment. “I-Is this what I think it is?” I glared at the silver band as though I could decipher its meaning.

            “It’s a promise ring, Eren. Once we get through everything, then it’ll be something more. That is, if you want it to be.”

            My eyes darted up to his face in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? Of course I want it to mean something more. Is this like…half of a proposal?”

            “Calm down. You’re going to start hyperventilating.”

            “I don’t care. I’m really happy.” He stared at me for a number of seconds before he took the ring back off my finger. “What? No. You can’t take it back just like that.”

            “Be quiet,” he said, dropping down onto his knee. “You can’t sit there and say that my half-ass proposal made you happy. It makes me want to do it properly, so be quiet for a minute before I change my mind.” I shut my mouth so fast, my teeth clanked together. He rolled his eyes at me, but grabbed my hand once again. “Eren Yeager, will you marry me?”

            I never thought that I could become an emotional mess over six words, but there I was with tears running down my face. I was so overwhelmed with emotion, that I could hardly form words, but I wrapped my arms around his neck, whispering, “Yes.” Yes one thousand times over.

            He slid the ring onto my finger again, pecking my hand before leaning up to kiss me. “We’ll make it through this. I’ll make sure of it.”

            “I know.”

            Suddenly the door flew open and Isabel came running in. “I’m sorry if you guys were about to get down and dirty, but I need to talk to Eren. It’s important— _oh my fucking god is that a ring_?” She snatched my hand up, looking from me to Levi. “Is this…? Did you…? I’m about to scream at the top of my lungs.”

            “Spare me,” Levi said, leaning over me to pick up his mug. “I’ll leave you two alone so you can talk. I’m sure Farlan is in need of a pair of ears, anyway.”

            After he left, Isabel sat down next to me, still staring down at the ring. “I can’t believe this. He actually proposed to you.” She dropped my hand to bring both of hers up to her face. “We have to make it out of this shit alive. Levi just proposed marriage to you and Farlan finally accepted my feelings. I’m willing to sell my soul if it will guarantee us our safety.”

            “What?” I grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her. “He accepted your feelings? Tell me what happened.”

            She dropped her hands down to her lap with a smile. “I explained to him how it didn’t matter where I was, that it wouldn’t mean a single thing to me if he wasn’t there with me. That all those times that I was talking about getting out of the underground, I meant with him.”

            I smiled. “I’m guessing he took it well.”

            “Yeah. He”—she dropped her eyes, her cheeks going a deep shade of pink—“told me he loved me, too.”

            I pulled her into a hug. “That’s great, Isabel. I’m happy for you guys. Really, I am.”

            “And I’m happy for you. I can’t believe Big Bro is going to marry you some day. But it’s right. Nobody else would do.” She sat back. “So, now that we got that out of the way, I need you to tell me all about sex.”

            I sputtered at the sudden change of subject. “Uh, I’m pretty sure that I can’t do that.”

            “And why not?”

            I waited for her to catch on to what I meant, but when she didn’t, I sighed. “Well, because, I’m a guy and I’m with another guy.” She gave me a blank stare. “Isabel, come on.”

            “Gay sex can’t be that different from straight sex. Just tell me everything that goes down and we’ll go from there.”

            “You’re killing me.”

            She put her hands on her hips, but before she could say anything, Hanji came into the room.

            Did anyone know how to knock?

            “There’s something we need to talk about,” Hanji said to me.

            Isabel groaned. “Does it have to happen right now? We were sort of in the middle of an important conversation.”

            “What is it?” I asked, glad that I wouldn’t have to explain to Isabel how gay sex worked.

            Hanji chuckled nervously. “Well…” she trailed off, taking a step away from the door to let someone in. That someone was none other then my best friend Armin, but it didn’t end there, because Mikasa was right behind him.

            “What the hell is going on?” I said in shock, standing up. “They can’t be here. Do you know how dangerous it is for them to be associated with me? If Erwin finds out, he’ll use them against me. They have to leave.”

            Mikasa crossed her arms over her chest, giving me her all too familiar glare. “Stop talking about us like we’re not right in front of you.”

            “You won’t be in a minute,” I muttered, angry that Hanji had let this happen. They couldn’t have found me here without her help. What the hell was she thinking? “You guys have to leave right now.”

            “Wait just one minute,” Mikasa said, coming to stand in front of me. “We’re not leaving until you hear us out.”

            “That’s not going to happen.”

            “Shut up for a second!” Armin yelled, startling all of us into silence. When he had our attention, he cleared his throat, blushing a little as he straightened his shirt. “We know how dangerous it is to be here, but we came anyway. And you want to know why? Because we love you, Eren, and we want to help you. I told you that I would and I think I finally can.”

            Mikasa put her arm around him protectively. “So will you listen to us?”

            I didn’t want them to stay here longer than necessary, but if they had something important to tell me, then I would talk with them. “Yes, but let’s go out into the living room.”

            I walked passed them, directing them back down the hall until we reached the living room. Then I gestured to the couch, waiting for them to take a seat before I sat down across from them. Hanji and Isabel had followed us, and after a few moments, both Farlan and Levi came in, as well. Everyone was here, so if they had something to tell me, now was the time.

            “What do you want to discuss with me?” I asked.

            Armin scooted closer to Mikasa, a look of unease on his face. “The day that you called me, you had me pick you up right behind that mansion. There were no other houses nearby, so I assumed that that’s where you were coming from. I did some research and found that it was owned by Erwin Smith, a former thug in the underground.” His blue eyes settled on Levi before he hurriedly looked away.

            “So you found out about Erwin?” I said.

            He nodded. “I found out a lot about him. Within the first couple months of him inheriting a large sum of money, he invested it all on a business that went under a year or so later. Due to this, he lost a lot of his inheritance and began to get behind on his bills. In fact, he was in the process of losing his house when suddenly he paid it off in full. That seemed suspicious to me.”

            “And?” Levi prompted when Armin went silent.

            Armin jumped up a little, but pulled out a folded piece of paper from his back pocket. He spread it out on the coffee table between us, pointing to the top of the page. “Everything Erwin owns is no longer in his name. It’s in the name of a man known as Kenneth Ackerman.”

            I looked up at him in confusion. “I don’t understand how this will help us. We already knew he was connected to Kenny.”

            “Let him finish,” Mikasa snapped.

            Armin put his hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay, Mikasa.”

            “No, it’s not,” I said. “I’m sorry. Go on.”

            He nodded. “I had to hack into Kenny’s personal computer to find out this information, but it seems that he has a legal contract with Erwin. To put it simply: Kenny basically owns him. Erwin can’t do anything without consenting him—that’s including leaving his own home.”

            Levi sat up at this new information. “Come again?”

            “Um,” Armin stammered, “it’s as it sounds. The one time Erwin tried to escape, Kenny had him beaten. He sustained a number of injuries that were life threatening, but somehow he pulled through. From that point on, he hasn’t done anything to act against Kenny. He’s his puppet.”

            Levi clenched his fists in anger. “That changes everything.” He stood up, turning to Farlan. “Contact Erd. I have a task for him and Auruo.”

            Farlan gave a quick nod of his head. “Okay.”

            “Wait,” I said. “What are you planning?”

            Levi glanced down at the ring he had just given me before he turned away. “There’s something I have to do, and I’m going to need your little friend’s help.”

            Mikasa shook her head. “No, absolutely not. You have to explain to us what you want before we’ll agree to anything.”

            “Will it help Eren?” Armin asked, dropping his head to look at his hands.

            “Yes,” Levi confirmed.

            “Then I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever you ask of me.”

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is why I couldn't bring myself to hate Erwin--despite everything he's done, because, as you can see, it wasn't of his own free will. I cry. The true enemy here is Kenny. And, well, Reece, but forget about that douche bag for right now.
> 
> Feel free to tell me your thoughts. I love reading the comments you guys leave me. 
> 
> Also, I know Levi's proposal wasn't the least bit romantic, but I'll make up for that in later chapters. ;) x50
> 
> Thanks for reading! <3


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am still emotionally fucked up from the 2nd part of ACWNR. I mean, damn. If you haven't watched it, then stop right here, because spoilers are about to happen.
> 
> When Levi was killing the titan that had killed both Farlan and Isabel, I just… I broke down. MY BABY! NO! 
> 
> I'm so glad that I can include those two in this fanfic, because I love them and they need to keep on living in some way. They're too precious not to.
> 
> Excuse me while I go roll around in my emotions, so go on and read. (o TωT)o

As Armin went to stand up to follow Levi out of the room, Mikasa’s hand shot out to prevent him from going anywhere. She snatched a handful of his shirt, using the fabric she had grasped to yank him back down onto the couch. With a glance in his direction, she gave a quick shake of her head. It took me a moment to realize that she wasn’t going to let him leave.

            Even though I knew that Armin would be safe with Levi, I couldn’t deny the fact that I would react the same way if I were in her position. She didn’t know anything about Levi, so I couldn’t expect her to trust him just like that. If this was going to work out, I would have to convince her that there was nothing to worry about, but that was easier said than done.

            “Mikasa,” Armin said in a reassuring tone, “I’ll be fine.”

            “Why can’t we discuss what you want to talk about with Armin right here?” Mikasa asked, staying calm. It surprised me that she wasn’t losing her cool about the whole thing, but then her eyes darted down to my left hand, and everything made a little more sense.

            She had seen the ring. Was she putting forth this effort to be nice on account of me?

            “I’m the worst friend,” I grumbled.

            It had been months since I left Trost without so much as a good-bye, yet here they were, putting themselves in danger in order to support me. How could they even consider helping me when I hadn’t even bothered to contact them? Of course I was trying to keep them out of this at all costs, but still, I should have found a way to keep them in my life—just like they were striving to find a way to keep me in theirs.

            “What?” Armin and Mikasa said in unison, immediately coming over to sit on either side of me on the couch.

            “You aren’t the worst friend,” Mikasa said, putting her arm around my shoulder. “Why would you think that?”

            “Because you guys are sitting here trying to help me, and I haven’t even given you an explanation as to why I’m in this mess to begin with.”

            “It doesn’t matter how you ended up in this situation,” Armin said. “We want to help you in any way we can, Eren. Don’t feel bad. You’ve obviously been through a lot, and have shouldered it all by yourself this whole time.”

            I smiled softly, looking down at my ring finger. “Not all by myself. From the beginning, I’ve had help. I wouldn’t have been able to make it through any of this without Levi.”

            Mikasa turned her head to gaze at said man. “I don’t know you, and I’m not even sure if I like you for Eren, but…thank you. Thank you for keeping him safe up until now.”

            “I haven’t done much,” Levi said, dropping his eyes to peer at my ankle—the ankle that was almost completely healed. “He’s very much capable of taking care of himself. He proved that when he escaped Erwin’s mansion without any of my help.”

            I may not have had his help, but if it weren’t for Krista, I wouldn’t have escaped that night. The reason why I was here right now, safe in the town house, was because of her. And how was she? I had no way of knowing that. I could only hope that Kenny hadn’t taken anything out on her, because she had nothing to do with this.

            “I didn’t do it alone,” I murmured. “Krista helped me since the night of the masquerade ball.”

            “Krista?” Armin said, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “Krista Lenz?”

            I looked over at him and noticed the concerned expression on his face. “You know who she is?”

            “Not exactly. I—after Erwin’s accident she—”

            “Wait, hold on a minute.” I held up my index finger to signal him to stop, which he did right away. “Erwin’s accident? What are you talking about?”

            He and Mikasa exchanged glances when Levi came to stand in front of them. They both glanced up at him as he leaned in and said, “You need to tell us all the information you have, because it’s obvious that you still haven’t told us everything.”

            Armin averted his eyes as he began to speak. “I’d say a week after Eren escaped, Erwin was in a severe accident. It made local news. That’s where I saw Krista with that man—Kenny. According to him, and the reports, she was going to be moving in with him because of Erwin’s grave state.” He exhaled, noting how Levi had gone rigid. “I’m sorry. I really thought you knew.”

            “Is he dead?” Isabel asked, speaking up for the first time since they had arrived.

            “No,” Mikasa said. “We don’t know all the details, but the last thing that was announced on the news was that he was stable and in the process of recovering. I don’t think he’ll be a problem for you anymore, because he’s paralyzed from the waist down.”

            The news she had just uttered hit me like a rock to the face.

            The last image I had of Erwin was of him walking out of the Sapphire Room. When I had told him that he was the worst type of person, he had paused for a moment. Why? Was this truly any of his doing? If I was his last hope of freedom, then why had he left me alone in that room long enough for me to escape? Something wasn’t adding up.

            “We have to talk to him,” I said, standing up. I couldn’t sit for another second. There had to be more to this that we didn’t know, and the only way we were going to find out was if we spoke to him.

            Levi walked around the coffee table to come stand next to me. He grabbed my hand, waiting until I made eye contact with him to speak. “That isn’t possible, Eren. The mansion is heavily guarded. We wouldn’t be able to get in without being spotted. I’m not going to risk our lives to spend a few moments with him.”

            “But he can have important information,” I explained.

            “I don’t care what information he has. It’s not worth the risk.”

            “Then what are we going to do? Krista is in danger, and I don’t even know what happened to Ymir. I told her that I would come back. We can’t just abandon them.”

            Mikasa’s posture stiffened in response to my words. “Eren, I don’t know everything about this, but I do know that Kenny is dangerous. Or has the fact that we share the same surname slipped your mind?”

            Levi turned around to face her. “You’re an Ackerman?”

            “Yes,” she said. “I don’t know much about Kenny, but I’m pretty sure we’re related.”

            “If that’s the case, then you and I are related, as well. Kenny is my uncle.”

            My head whipped in his direction, because that was brand new information for me. All this time, he had never spoken about Kenny, and whenever I asked any questions about the man, he would evade them like it was his life’s mission. “What?”

            He gave my hand a gentle squeeze, ignoring Mikasa’s glare that was trained on him. “It’s not important. He wasn’t much of an uncle anyway, and he’s the reason that I ended up becoming a thug in the first place.”

            “But then he met us,” Isabel said, shooting up from the place she sat to run over to us. She threw her arms around our shoulders, pulling us against her. “We’re you’re family now, right Big Bro?” She waved her hand at Farlan. “Get over here, you big dummy. You’re a part of this. You too, Hanji.”

            “And so are you guys.” I held my free hand out to Mikasa and Armin. They looked at it for a moment before reaching out to take it. This was my family and I would do anything to keep them safe. All of the people in this room meant everything to me.

            “On a serious note,” Farlan said, taking a place behind Isabel, “what are we going to do now? I already called Erd. He and the others should be here soon.” His eyes moved down for a second, a nervous look passing his face right before he wrapped his arms around Isabel’s waist. Her eyes popped open in surprise, a blush coloring her cheeks, but a huge smile lit up her face and I knew she was happy.

            Levi grinned at them as he laced his fingers through mine. “We’re going to have to find out a way to contact Erwin without alerting Kenny. I think Eren’s friend will be able to help us do that. He hacked into Kenny’s computer, after all.” He eyed Armin. “Do you think you could do the same to Erwin’s personal computer?”

            Armin nodded. “Yes. Are you intending to leave him some type of message that way?”

            “That’s the plan, but you’re going to have to be careful that you don’t leave a trace of information behind,” Levi said.

            “That won’t be a problem. If you have a computer, I could get started right away.”

            Hanji jumped at the opportunity as if it would disappear in the blink of an eye. “There’s a computer in my room. Let’s go.” She grabbed his hand, startling him as she began to drag him out of the living room. He shot a worried stare over his shoulder and Mikasa immediately reacted to it, trailing after him with a determined stride.

            Levi turned to me, pressing a soft kiss to my cheek. “I’m going to go in there or else Hanji will eat him alive.”

            “Should I come too?”

            He shook his head. “No. I’m going to ask Hanji and your other friend to leave the room. There are some things I’d like to discuss with Armin alone.”

            “Mikasa probably won’t leave.”

            “I’m aware of that, which is why I plan on telling her that you need her out here.”

            I smirked, wrapping my arms around his neck and leaning into him. “Sneaky.”

            “Get a room!” Isabel hollered, putting her hands on her hips as she stared at us with amusement in her eyes. “We don’t want a show.”

            I laughed, but it caught in my throat when Levi kissed the corner of my mouth. I could feel the heat rushing to my cheeks, but he didn’t give me any time to return the affection, because he left the room right after.

            Isabel came striding over to me, bumping her shoulder into mine. “I’m still your favorite, right? Even with your friends here.”

            “I love you just the same,” I told her.

            “That’s not the same thing.” She pouted.

            I ruffled her hair. “It is. But”—I looked from her to Farlan—“how are _things_ going?”

            “Good,” she squeaked, flushing at the sound of her own voice. Then she leaned in closer to me to add, “Did you see him wrap his arms around me earlier?”

            “I did.” I playfully jabbed my elbow against her arm a few times. “You’re moving on up.”

            She gave me a  _you did not just say that_ look, but was still grinning like a fool. “So, do you think Erwin is going to be of any help? I have my doubts. He’s paralyzed. What’s to say that he won’t turn you in to prevent Kenny from causing him anymore harm?”

            “I don’t know what he’s going to do when he discovers Levi’s message,” I said. “I just hope that he gives us some valid information that will help us take Kenny down. With him out of the way, we’ll be able to focus on Reece. Then, once he’s gone, we won’t have anything to worry about anymore.”

            She propped her arm up on my shoulder. “Yeah, I’m looking forward to that. Then we can plan your wedding.”

            Mikasa chose that exact time to come walking in, her eyes narrowing as she heard the last string of words Isabel had said. Talking to her about my engagement with Levi was the last thing I wanted to do, because I knew that she wouldn’t understand. All she would choose to see is how I was still sixteen, but age wasn’t even a factor in my relationship with Levi. I knew that what we had would last, and it wasn’t like we were planning to get married right away.

            “I’ll be over here,” Isabel said, jerking her thumb over her shoulder. She dashed toward Farlan, looping her arm through his to lug him out of the room. He didn’t seem to mind.

            Of course he didn’t. Mikasa looked like the human form of a storm.

            “Hey,” I said to her as she approached me with a sneer. So far, she had been able to keep her emotions in check, but I knew her patience was wearing thin. Unlike Armin, she would demand an explanation from me. “What’s up?”

            She ignored me, then, as we came face to face, she grabbed the collar of my shirt, shoving me back against the wall. “I’m going to give you until Armin comes back to explain everything to me. He made me promise that I wouldn’t do this in front of everyone, and I didn’t, but now none of them are here, so give me the explanation I deserve.”

            It was true that she deserved more than I had given her, but I still wasn’t sure how to brush up on the subject of how I ended up living in the underground. It was a long story.

            “Well?” she demanded.          

            I took a deep breath, preparing myself for what was about to come. “Let’s sit down first.”

            She stepped back from me, releasing her hold on my shirt to cross the room and sit down on the couch. I followed her, taking the empty spot next to her. She watched me the whole time and I was sure that she was on the verge of just throwing me down.

            Once I was seated, I said, “Do you remember when my mom was sick?” She nodded, her expression of anger melting away to one of concern. “Well, that’s how it all started. I went down to the underground to buy herbs that would help her. They weren’t available in Trost, so I figured it wouldn’t be a big deal if I went and got them for her.”

            “But it was a big deal,” Mikasa whispered, putting her hand over mine.

            “Yeah, it was.” I glanced down at my feet, remembering how I hadn’t been thinking about anything but my mom. It had never occurred to me that there could be consequences for going to the underground. “I was on my way out when I came across Isabel—the girl with the red hair you met earlier. She was being hassled by two guys and you know how I can get.”

            Her fingers tightened around my hand. “You fought them, didn’t you?”

            “Yes. But at the time I wasn’t aware that one of them was the leader of a gang.”

            “Would knowing that have stopped you?”

            I laughed, shaking my head. “No.”

            “That’s what I thought,” she muttered. “So you got yourself mixed up in all this mess because you had to try to be a hero.”

            Her dark eyes flicked up to mine and I could see that she wasn’t about to let me drop the subject. But what else could I tell her? Giving her a thorough, detailed explanation wouldn’t help us in any way. And I knew that it would only serve to make her angry with the people I had come to love and care for.

            “None of that matters anymore,” I said. “We’re going to figure this all out—”

            “You won’t,” she interrupted. “That’s why I’m getting you out of here. I’ve been saving up for quite a while now and I have enough money in my bank account to buy us some plane tickets to a place far away from here. We won’t come back until all this is long forgotten.”

            I stared at her as though she had gone crazy. “I’m not going anywhere, Mikasa.”

            “Yes, you are. I figured we’d leave by—”

            “Mikasa,” I said, exasperated. “When I say I’m not leaving, I mean it. As much as you don’t like this, I am a part of it. I can’t leave the people I care about behind.”

            She chewed on her lower lip, turning her head away from me. “This is because of him, isn’t it? Is he manipulating you in any way? Eren, you know you can tell me if he is. We’ll leave right now. I’ll go get Armin and we can get the hell out of here.”

            I held both my hands up, willing her to calm down. “Mikasa, look at me.” I grabbed her by the shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze of reassurance. “No one is manipulating me to do anything—especially not Levi. I’m in love with him, and I know you don’t believe that, or maybe you think I was forced into it somehow, but I wasn’t. I really do love him.”

            Silence settled over us and I watched as her eyes moved down to the ring on my finger once again. “Oh,” she said at last. “I see. So you’ve just forgotten all about the people who were in your life before all this happened.”

            “That’s not true. I haven’t forgotten about you or Armin. I didn’t want to get you guys involved. That’s why I lost all ties with you.”

            She stood up, pacing in front of me. “So it’s all right for you to try to protect us, but not the other way around? You’re such a hypocrite, Eren.”

            This wasn’t a conversation I wanted to be having with her. What was the point of arguing about this? I wasn’t going to leave. It wasn’t up to her to decide what I did, and maybe it was time for me to do the same. Even though I didn’t want her and Armin to get hurt, it was their decision to be there and I was done trying to stop them.

            “I’m not leaving,” I said. “But if you want to stay here and help me, then that’s completely up to you. You have to understand that this is a dangerous situation I’m in, though. So there are a lot of things that can go wrong.”

            For a long while, she just continued to pace. Then, with a sigh, she sat back down next to me. “Does he love you?” she asked.

            “Yes.”

            “Does he make you happy?”

            “More than you’ll ever know.”

            “And you accepted that ring of your own free will? You didn’t feel pressured to take it or anything?”

            I shook my head. “No, Mikasa. I wasn’t pressured into it.”

            “Okay,” she whispered. “I won’t try to get you to leave this place, but don’t expect me and Armin to leave either. You are a part of our life, Eren. If you think we can go on living like everything is normal when we know you’re in this type of danger, then you’re absolutely wrong.”

            I pulled her into a hug, knowing that she needed it. “I’m sorry.”

            “For what?”

            “For keeping you guys in the dark so long. For making you both worry so much that you went out of your way to find me.”

            She dropped her head onto my shoulder, her arms snaking around my waist. “You would do the same for us.”

            I would. If one of them had suddenly disappeared, I would’ve dropped everything until I found them, so perhaps it shouldn’t have been hard for me to understand that they were willing to do the same for me. They had been my friends for as long as I could remember, and I was planning to keep it that way. I was going to stop pushing them away, because not only would it not do me any good, but I also needed them.

            Someone rang the doorbell, pulling us back into the present. I stood up, signaling for Mikasa to stay put as I crossed the room to head down the hallway that led to the entryway. By the time I reached it, Farlan was already pulling the door open. Erd was on the other side of it, along with Auruo and Gunther.

            “Miss me?” Auruo asked once he stepped inside, not waiting for us to reply before he added in a low tone, “Of course you did.”

            I rolled my eyes, because I _had_ missed him, but I wasn’t about to admit that. “No one missed you.”

            He didn’t look offended, smirking smugly. “Don’t try to cover up the intense emotion you must be feeling with crass words, Eren.”

            “You are still annoying,” I said with a laugh.

            “And you’re still a brat.”

            “Good,” Levi said from behind me, shutting us both up in an instant, “you guys are here. There’s a lot we need to discuss, so let’s go into the other room to catch up. As for you”—he stepped up to me—“go fill your friends in on everything that has happened up until now. They need to know about it all if they are going to be sticking around.”

            I met his eyes with my own. “You don’t mind if they stay?”

            “No. If you want them here, then I’m not against it, but you should warn them of the danger they’ll be in if they choose to get more involved than they already are.”

            I nodded. “I will. Even though I’m sure they already know.”

            Gazing up at me, he cupped my face in his hands. “It’s up to you, Eren. If you don’t want them to stay, then I’ll make them leave. I’ll be the bad guy.”

            “That’s okay,” I said, offering him a small smile. “I have things under control.” I leaned down to press my lips to his ear. “Plus, I don’t want them to think bad of you when you’re my fiancée.” When I stood up straight again, I saw that he had turned his head to the side to hide his flushed cheeks from the men that were waiting patiently behind us. I smiled at him. “You’re really cute when you blush.”

            The shade of his cheeks deepened to a soft scarlet. “I—you—Just go talk to your friends.” He rushed down the hallway and the boys followed after him. Farlan grinned at me knowingly as he passed me, giving my shoulder a few pats before he disappeared with the rest of them.

            I wasn’t sure how we were going to fare against Kenny and Reece, but I knew that I would do anything to protect my little family—even if it cost me my life.

           

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is where the action begins. I'm ready. Yet at the same time, I'm not, because I like writing realistically and you know some of Levi's men have to die but…no. I don't want to.
> 
> We'll see how it all goes down. 
> 
> As always, thank you for reading, commenting, leaving kudos, and subscribing to this work. I LOVE YOU! ( ˘ ³˘)❤


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say there was going to be action in this chapter? *coughs dramatically* I meant next chapter. :D
> 
> Sorry, but seriously speaking here, next chapter is where it all begins. 
> 
> But I hope you still enjoy this chapter. :)

A week after Armin hacked into Erwin’s personal computer, he returned Levi’s message in the form of a New Event on his calendar. He had written the following:

 

_Plaza Café_

_10 a.m._

 

            I stared at the short message for a long time, my eyes taking in the date he had marked it for. Tomorrow. He wanted to meet Levi tomorrow.

            We couldn’t trust him. For all we knew, this could be his way of getting back into Kenny’s good graces. There had to be an ulterior motive for this meeting. It couldn’t be to help us. He had already proven that time and time again. Maybe he wanted to capture Levi, so he could figure out where I was. After all, I had been his ticket to freedom.

            “No,” I said, grabbing onto Levi’s hand as though I would be able to keep him by my side with that simple connection between us. “You’re not going, right?”

            He looked at me, but only for a moment. Then his eyes moved back to the computer screen. “I have to, but I’m not going to let my guard down, Eren. Erd and Auruo will scope out the surroundings beforehand, and Farlan and me will follow Erwin from his mansion to see if he’s coming with anyone else.”

            “But won’t he expect that much of you? If he’s already shown Kenny your message, then they could have been planning this out for a week straight. They have the advantage here, Levi. Why don’t you write him back, and tell him to meet you at a different spot—one that you picked out?”

            He sat down next to me on the bed and everyone else in the room went quiet as we gazed at each other. I couldn’t do this in front of them. This was a personal matter—one between him and me. So if we were going to discuss this, then it would have to be in private.

            Without a word, I stood up and left the room, giving Mikasa a meaningful look as I did. I didn’t want her following me. It was bad enough that her and Armin had practically ran away from home to help me. They had stayed at the town house for the past week, lying to their parent’s about where they were spending their Spring break.

            When I reached the back door, I threw it open, feeling more frustrated than I had in a long time. I knew that this wasn’t just about what happened tonight. This was about everything. This whole situation we were in was unfair. Getting passed it seemed impossible.

            I kept walking until I reached the fence, and then I just stood there, staring off into the distance.

            “Eren,” Levi called from behind me. The backyard wasn’t that big, so I knew he would reach me soon.

            I didn’t turn around to look at him as I spoke. “Not once in my life have I ever wanted to run away from my problems. But if I were given the chance to right now, I would, because I don’t want to lose anyone Levi. I don’t want to see people I love die, and I don’t want to see them lose everything they fought to keep.”

            “I…”

            I held my hand up and shook my head. “It’s okay. You don’t have to comfort me. None of this is your fault, and you’re going through a lot more than I am.”

            “I don’t want to see you this way,” he said as he reached me.

            “I’ll be okay.”

            “Will you?”

            To be honest, I wasn’t sure if I was going to be all right. This past week had been one of the most stressful weeks of my life. I kept on imagining the worst-case scenario happening, my mind supplying me with gory images of my friends dying at the hands of our enemy. There would be so many of us that would lose our lives.

            “I don’t know,” I confessed. “How can I know when the outcome of this looks bleak?”

            “None of us can predict the outcome.” He grabbed my arm, prompting me to turn around and face him. When I did, he lifted his right hand to cup my cheek. “I don’t know how this will turn out. I don’t know how many lives will be lost. But I do know what I’m fighting for.”

            I leaned into his touch, shutting my eyes. “I do, too.”

            “If I could stop this from happening, Eren, I would. But I don’t have that kind of power, and I know that neither of us can run away from this, even though we want to.”

            “I know,” I whispered.

            “The odds are against us, and there’s no guarantee that we’ll make it out of this alive, but I need you to know that…you’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”

            “Levi—”

            “Shh,” he said. “It’s true. I’ve never loved anyone the way that I love you.”

            I turned my head to the side, opening my eyes for the briefest of moments before I brought my hands up to cover my face. “Life is really unfair, isn’t it? It’s people like Kenny who deserve this to happen to them. Not us. Not us, Levi.”

            He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against him. “Unfortunately, we don’t have a choice.”

 

* * *

 

The next morning, I had to say good-bye to my two best friends. We stood together on the front porch and Armin was the first to break down in tears. Mikasa grabbed his hand when he reached for hers, never once looking up from her feet as she did. She hadn’t looked at me the entire morning.

            “Mikasa,” I said.

            She shook her head slowly. “Don’t say good-bye. We’ll see each other again.”

            Armin nodded right away. “Yes. Make sure you call and tell us what happens. If you don’t, I swear we’ll come right back.”

            “I’ll call,” I told him.

            Hanji started waving them over from where she stood by her car. “We have to get going, you two!”

            They stepped closer to me to embrace me for what could be the last time, but I didn’t want to think about that. I had to have hope that I would make it out of this, that we would all make it out of this.

            “See you,” Armin mumbled before he darted down the porch steps without a backwards glance in my direction. I was glad that he didn’t look back, because he needed to go home. They both did.

            They would be safe there.

            Once he was in the car, Mikasa grabbed the sleeve of my shirt, giving it a gentle tug. “I…” She worried at her bottom lip, which was a nervous habit of hers. “Please don’t die.”

            “I won’t. Mikasa, look at me”—I put my hand on her arm—“I won’t die.”

            She nodded once, and then threw her arms around me, holding onto me as if I was the only thing keeping her upright. Then, giving me one last peck on the cheek, she turned around to walk down the pathway that led to the sidewalk.

            This wouldn’t be the last time I would see them. I’d make sure of it.

            After Hanji’s car disappeared down the road, I went back inside, walking through the town house until I reached the backroom where everyone was gathered. It was seven o’clock, which meant we didn’t have a lot of time before we would be heading out, so Levi was going over the plans again to make sure everyone knew what was expected of them.

            I would be riding with him and Farlan to Erwin’s house. From there, we would keep track of who came in and out of the mansion. If we saw anyone other then Erwin leave the house, we wouldn’t go to the café. Levi wasn’t willing to take the risk, and neither was I.

            When I walked into the room, Isabel came to stand by me, looping her arm through mine. She had a worried expression on her face, her eyes darting to Farlan every few seconds. While we went out, she would be staying behind with Hanji. She wasn’t happy about it, but agreed without complaint, because she knew that she didn’t have the proper training to keep up with us in case we should wind up in any trouble.

            “I don’t like this,” she whispered.

            “Neither do I.”

            She sighed, leaning her head against my shoulder. “Be safe, okay? Don’t try anything stupid, and if anyone even approaches my Farlan, make sure you stab a bitch.”

            I chuckled, reaching up to ruffle her hair. “He’s a lot more street smart than me, so he’ll see a threat coming long before I do.”

            “Don’t sell yourself short. You’re pretty good at sensing danger as well, and make sure you listen to your gut instincts. If something tells you to run, you run. You hear me?”

            “I hear you, but in return I want you to not worry so much. We’ll be okay.”

            She tugged me closer. “I’m counting on that.”

            As Levi finished up talking, Farlan came up to us, and I gave Isabel a kiss on the forehead before I nudged her forward. She offered me a small smile as they left the room together. Then I went over to stand next to Levi, who immediately reached down and took hold of my hand.

            “Is everyone clear on what’s going on?” Levi asked, his eyes moving from face to face.

            “Crystal clear, boss,” Auruo remarked, looking as smug as ever. Erd and Gunther nodded, and then gave Auruo a look that made him furrow his brows in confusion. “What?”

            Erd rolled his eyes. “Let’s give them some room.”

            Auruo smacked his hand down on my shoulder; giving it a firm squeeze. “I knew that.”

            Once we were alone, Levi turned to me, putting his hands on my hips. “Are you ready?”

            “Yeah.”

            “Eren,” he said, swaying my hips back and forth, “really?”

            I sighed, resting my head on his shoulder. “I have to be ready, and I will be. I’ll follow any orders you give me and I won’t get in the way.”

            He kissed the top of my head. “That’s not like you. I don’t want you to put yourself in any unnecessary danger, but I also want you to have a mind of your own out there.” After he finished his sentence, he snorted, and it took me a while to realize that he was holding back laughter.

            “What? What’s so funny?”

            “It’s nothing,” he said. “I just think it would be impossible for you to follow my orders if it goes against something you feel strongly about.”

            I leaned back, narrowing my eyes. “I could follow your orders.”

            “Really now?”

            I scoffed. “Yes. Maybe. I mean…I could if I really wanted to.”

            “Don’t strain yourself.”

            “Shut up. I am not straining myself.” I shoved him back, but he held onto my waist, laughing into the crook of my neck. “When we get back from this, I’m not putting out for a week.”

            “Oh?” He slipped his hand beneath my shirt, fingertips grazing along my spine. “Want to make a bet?”

            I stood up straight, determined to keep my dignity. “What is it?”

            “I bet that if we come back from this, you could not put out for a week, and I wouldn’t mind, so long as I got to see your face every day from here on out.”

            I deflated, sagging against him. “That’s not how you make a bet.”

            “Mm,” he hummed in confirmation, and then added in a softer tone, “We have to go.”

            “Okay.”

            He grabbed my hand and we walked out of the room together. Everyone was already in the entryway, talking amongst themselves until their eyes settled on us. They went quiet, waiting for Levi to give them the go ahead. He did with a simple nod of his head, and I watched as everyone filed out of the house.

            Farlan and Isabel lingered back, and when they leaned in toward one another to kiss, I tugged Levi out onto the front porch so they could have their privacy. They deserved a few minutes alone.

            “So,” Auruo said the second I stepped outside, slinging his arm around my shoulders, “are you ready to put your training to use?”

            “I kind of have to be.”

            He surprised me by punching me in the arm hard enough to make me clench my teeth. “Come on. That’s not the type of attitude I want to see today. You’ve trained with Erd and me for a long time. You’re strong and capable of handling yourself, if any trouble should occur. So I’m going to ask you again: Are you ready to put your training to use?”

            "Yes,” I said, feeling a little more confident in my abilities. “I’m ready for anything.”

            “That’s more like it.” He clapped me on the back. “Just remember that out there, and keep fighting, even when you think you can’t fight anymore.”

            After Farlan joined us on the porch, Levi directed us to the two cars Hanji had rented. It was while we were walking down the pathway that suddenly a black car pulled up next to ours. Levi was immediately on guard, stepping in front of me with a grave expression on his face.

            “Who is it?” Farlan asked, moving to stand beside me.

            “Don’t know,” Levi said, “but if they attempt anything, then don’t hesitate to act.” Slyly, he pulled out a large pocketknife from his back pocket, flipping it open so the blade was out. Farlan did the same.

            What was going on? Could Erwin have discovered where we were? If he had, then Isabel was no longer safe here at the town house. We would have to find another place for her to stay.

            “Stay back,” Levi instructed me as the person in the car opened up the driver’s side door. A man with light-brown hair stepped out onto the sidewalk, wearing a similar expression as Levi’s. “Who are you, and what do you want?”

            The man didn’t answer him right away, instead sizing him up with eyes as cold as ice. “Call me Flagon, and I’m here because Hanji sent me. By the look on your face, this is an unexpected turn of events. So if you don’t believe me, go ahead and give her a call. I’ll wait.”

            “I wouldn’t put it past her to pull something like this,” Levi said, turning to Farlan, “so call her.”

            Farlan pulled out a cell phone from his front pocket, never taking his eyes off Flagon as he did. A minute or so later, he said, “Hey, Hanji. It’s Farlan. I just called you to figure out if you sent a man named Flagon over to the town house.” He paused, giving a quick nod of his head. “Got you.” Ending the call, he stated, “She sent him.”

            Flagon crossed his arms over his chest in response. “Now can I tell you why I’m here?”

            “It’s not like we have much of a choice,” Levi muttered. “So get on with it.”

            With a smirk, Flagon turned his back toward us, walking to his vehicle. He popped open the trunk, gesturing for us to come over and take a look. I stepped off the curb to get an eyeful of weaponry. “Well?”

            “What is all this?” I asked.

            Flagon’s eyes shot over to where I stood. “What does it look like? It’s weapons you can use, if anything should happen today. Knives aren’t going to cut it. Guns will, and so will cross bows and—”

            “Are those grenades?” I blurted out, unconsciously interrupting him.

            “Yes, and they may come in handy.”

            “That won’t be necessary,” Levi remarked, grabbing hold of my arm to tug me back onto the sidewalk. “Get in the car. We’re wasting time sitting here listening to this.”

            As he pushed me in the opposite direction, I said, “Levi, wait. Maybe he’s right. Think about it, knives can’t go up against guns, and I’m pretty sure if Kenny shows up, that’s what he’s going to be using. You told me he was more of a gun person.”

            Farlan rubbed the back of his neck, eyeing Levi nervously. “That’s true.”

            “So you’re agreeing with him?” Levi looked at the both of us, waiting for our response.

            Approaching him slowly, I said, “It’s not that we’re agreeing him. We’re just thinking about all the possible outcomes. Don’t you want to be prepared for the worst?”

            For a long while, he stared at me with an uncertainty in his eyes that made me regret ever siding with a complete stranger. In a small voice that sounded nothing like his own, he whispered, “I don’t know how to…use a gun.”

            So that’s what this was about. He was familiar with knives, could work his way around one with ease. Since he didn’t know how to operate a gun, he didn’t feel comfortable using one—couldn’t trust himself with it.

            “Don’t worry about that,” Flagon said, leaning against his car. “I have several men stationed at both Erwin’s house and the café he wants to meet you at. They are gun experts, so they can handle any sudden attacks. If you don’t feel comfortable wielding a gun, take it anyway. If someone approaches you with something either than a knife, it’s better to have one on you than to depend on something you’re used to.”

            Levi narrowed his eyes, but gave a firm nod of his head. “Fine. I don’t like it, but I don’t have any more time to be wasting here. And if Hanji trusts you enough to go behind my back to recruit you, then I’ll put my trust in you, as well.”

            He grinned. “She knew you wouldn’t agree to this, so she assumed this was her best course of action. Apparently she was right.”

            “Just hand me a gun,” Levi shot back. “It has to be small enough that I can conceal it beneath my shirt.”

            Flagon bent forward to retrieve three handguns from the trunk. He handed one to each of us. “The safety is on.” He pointed to a small button-like switch. “Just flip it up, and you’re good.”

            Levi didn’t say anything more, hiking up his shirt in the back to tuck the gun into his waistband. For some reason, I found that incredibly sexy, and before I could fix my gaze somewhere else, he turned around and caught me staring. “What?” he said.

            “N-Nothing,” I stammered, all but shoving the gun into my waistband to busy myself with some meaningless task.

            How could I think about those types of things at a time like this? This was a serious matter we were confronting, so I needed to keep my mind away from possible distractions, though I was sure I would focus once we were on the road and headed to Erwin’s house.

            “All right,” Farlan said, putting his hand on my shoulder. “Let’s go.”

            I followed him to the car, yanking open the back door with more force than necessary. Maybe my mind was providing me with these thoughts because I didn’t want to think about the possible outcomes of today. Even though Hanji had provided us with a lot more than we ever could have asked for, I was sure that Kenny could handle it. He had money on his side, which meant he could hire far more men then we had, and could buy a lot more weapons then we could ever possess.

            “You okay?” Farlan asked me as he got settled in the driver’s seat, looking at me in the rearview mirror.

            I nodded. “I’m fine.”

            “Eren, I know this is shit, but trust us, okay? We’ve been through some horrible stuff before, so we’re experienced in this, and I promise we won’t let anything happen to you.”

            “No,” I said. “I don’t want you to pay any attention to me. I’ll take care of myself. You focus on you. If you were to get hurt saving me, it would be pointless, because I’m sure Isabel would kill me anyway.”

            He laughed. “We’re going to be fine, and if you actually think I’m going to leave you alone in this, then think again. We’re family, Eren. Family looks after each other.”

            “I… Thank you.”

            When Levi opened the passenger side door, I took a deep breath. I could do this. All I had to do was focus on the here and now. I couldn’t think about the things that could happen. There was no point in doing that; it would only serve as a distraction, and that was the last thing I needed.

            “Are you ready?” Levi asked, turning around in his seat to look at me.

            This time when I answered, “Yes,” I really meant it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did anyone else thing Flagon from ACWNR was hot? He kind of has the same eyebrows as Levi, and idk, I just wanted to add him to this fic, because I can. He's a badass, so he fits right in anyway.
> 
> Anywho, next chapter our gang finally meets up with Erwin again. What will happen? (I sound like those people who talk at the end of a kids' cartoon. Omg.) xD I'm killing the suspense. 
> 
> But, thank you for reading! I appreciate all of you!! <3


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I'm 28 chapters into this fanfic, and I still have so much left to cover before I can bring it to a close. Wow. This may turn out to be a little longer than expected, but that's all good.
> 
> Anyway, this chapter is sad as hell. I'm sorry. Really. 
> 
> UGH!
> 
> Go read.

We had been standing some ways from Erwin’s mansion for the last thirty minutes. There was no sign of anyone going in or out of the premises. So far, it looked like Erwin wasn’t up to anything. Of course that didn’t mean that he wasn’t. If I’d learned anything about him it was that he was a deceiving, conniving individual, who was capable of hurting anyone to get his way.

            “What do you think?” Farlan asked Levi, keeping his eyes on the front gates. “Do you really believe he’s going to show up at the café all by himself? That doesn’t sit right with me.”

            “Me neither,” Levi said, his face hidden in shadows. He stepped forward, a ray of sunlight cutting across his eyes, illuminating them to a pale gray. “But from what Erd told me, there doesn’t seem to be anyone waiting at the café for him, either. I don’t know what he’s up to.”

            I shifted from foot to foot, unable to put much attention to anything. “So, what are you going to do?”

            His eyes flicked over to me for a second before they moved back to the gates. “I’m still not sure. On the one hand, he could have information that could help us have an advantage over Kenny. But on the other hand, this could all be a trap to get you back, and if that’s the case, he would have prepared enough men to take down an army.”

            “So it’s not worth the risk,” I said.

            “Eren, if you aren’t comfortable here, I could send for Erd, and he could take you back to the townhouse.”

            “No. I’m fine.”

            The truth was I had never been more scared in my life. I kept picturing awful things happening to Levi, or to Farlan. God, I didn’t want anything bad to happen to them. Before joining them in the underground, I had always fought alone, so I never had to worry about the people I loved getting hurt, but that didn’t apply in this situation. If any trouble occurred, they could get hurt, and there wouldn’t be anything I could do to stop it.

            That terrified me. It also made it hard to focus.

            “Someone is coming out of the front gate,” Farlan said, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Is that Erwin? Why isn’t he in a car?”

            My eyes found the man that was almost unrecognizable. Erwin looked nothing like the person he had been mere months ago. He had lost a considerable amount of weight, his hair mussed and falling over his eyes. Even when he had offered me to Kenny, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. He looked absolutely miserable, which brought my gaze down to the wheelchair he was now bound to.

            “Shit,” I murmured.

            “That’s Kenny’s work for you,” Levi commented, and then after a beat added, “I’m going to talk to him. He looks like he hasn’t slept well in weeks, so I doubt he’s been scheming anything.”

            Farlan pulled out the cell phone he’d been carrying, typing in quick messages to both Erd and Auruo. “I still don’t trust him, but you have a point. He looks on the verge of a mental breakdown.”

            While they chatted, I couldn’t look away from Erwin. He wheeled himself down the sidewalk until he reached the mailbox, where he stayed for a long moment before he pulled out the mail. When he turned back around, I caught sight of his face. There were deep, dark bags under his eyes, and he was now sporting a beard. To put it simply: He looked a complete mess.

            “Should we meet back up with Auruo and Erd?” Farlan asked, staring down at the cell phone screen.

            “Yeah,” Levi replied. “Flagon said he would keep some of his men here until Erwin leaves, so it’s okay for us to go.”

            As Erwin disappeared behind the gates, I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Kenny was the type of man to use his victims for his own will, and when they defied him, he would inflict the worst kind of pain on them. Something about this didn’t sit well with me. Did Erwin really sign up for this kind of life? Keeping his fortunate was one thing, but putting his life into someone else’s hands was something completely different.

            “What are you thinking?” Levi asked, turning to face me.

            I shook my head, trying to clear my mind. “Tell me, did Erwin come off as the type of person that would willingly sell his life for money?”

            “No. When he was our leader, he was always putting all his energy into finding food for the rest of us. I never once thought that he would be capable of leaving everyone who depended on him for money.”

            “But he did leave, and never once looked back.” I glanced at the gates once again. “Do you think Kenny could have manipulated him into leaving the underground? After all, Hanji told me that you and Erwin were very close, and he didn’t even say anything to you about any of this. Didn’t that seem strange to you?”

            “Yes,” he said. “Of course it did. It seemed strange to all of us, and for the longest time, we thought something bad had happened to him. We didn’t know right away about him coming into money.”

            “I never believed it,” Farlan remarked. “Both his parent’s are dead, and he has no relatives, so I never bought that story he told us about inheriting money from some distant uncle. It didn’t make any sense, but it seemed like he was having the best time of his life, and he had no intentions on returning to the underground, so it wasn’t like we could do anything about it.”

            I leaned up against the brick building we were close to. “None of this adds up. From what I’ve gathered about Erwin, he doesn’t seem like a person that would let his last chance at freedom get away—yet there were no guards outside the Sapphire room the night I escaped. Don’t you think he would have kept a close eye on me?”

            Silence settled over us for a long while, and then Levi said, “We have to talk to him. If he let you escape that night, then Kenny would’ve tossed him to the side by now. He doesn’t like pets who don’t obey.”

            “‘Pets’?” I asked.

            “Yes. For a long time, I was his pet—someone who goes and does his bidding, who waits on him hand and foot, who is at his beck and call. It was disgusting.”

            I fought back the urge to punch the wall. “How did you get out of that?”

            “Erwin,” he told me. “If it weren’t for him, I would have never been able to escape Kenny’s clutches.”

            “So maybe this is some form of revenge on Kenny’s part,” Farlan said. “Erwin took away his favorite pet. Don’t you think he would want to get him back for something like that?”

            Levi grabbed my hand, directing me out of the small nook we had been hiding in. “I’ve heard enough. Let’s head to the café.”

            Fifteen minutes later, all three of us sat at a table near the front entrance of the Plaza Café. Auruo, Erd, and Gunther were outside with Flagon to make sure we didn’t have any unexpected guests, but I didn’t think we would. Erwin looked like a broken man, which wasn’t too surprising. He had lost the ability to walk. Who wouldn’t be depressed about life after that?

            Farlan gave a quick glance at his wristwatch. “He should be here any minute now.”

            I leaned back in the wooden chair I was sitting in, taking in the heavy scent of brewing coffee and pastries. It felt so surreal to be sitting in the middle of a café and know that nothing was normal about the situation you were in. Everyone around me was here to stop off for their morning coffee, or meet up with friends to chat about life. I was here to meet a man that could remain our enemy, or become our ally.

            As I sat up, my eyes swept over the chalkboard menu that hung above the front counter. I saw that today was March twenty-eighth—two days before my seventeenth birthday. Wow. Where did the time go?

            Unconsciously, I let out a small chuckle, which brought both Levi’s and Farlan’s attention back to me.

            “What is it?” Levi asked.

            I pointed to the chalkboard. “It’s my birthday in two days.”

            His eyes widened to the point that my chuckle turned into full-fledged laughter. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

            “I wasn’t keeping track,” I admitted, shrugging. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t look like someone just ran over your foot with a car. It’s okay.”

            Farlan muffled laughter of his own by covering his mouth with his hand. “Levi, I’m sure he has greater concerns than his birthday.”

            “Why are you both laughing?” Levi asked. “This isn’t funny.”

            “It’s not,” Farlan said, “but your expression is.”

            Our laughter picked up and I collapsed forward onto the table, burying my face in my arms. Farlan, who sat across from me, did the same, resting his head on mine. We sat there like that for a long while, and then when we finally recuperated from the little fit, we leaned up just to see Levi wearing an even more hilarious expression.

            “Oh my god it hurts,” Farlan sputtered, clutching his side.

            An elbow knocking against my arm brought me back to the present, and before I could even question why Levi had felt the need to do that, I saw Erwin enter the café. He had taken the time to shave his beard and comb his hair, but there was nothing he could do to get rid of the bags beneath his eyes, and the look of dismay on his face.

            As he wheeled himself up to the table we were sitting around, I couldn’t help but get out of my seat to assist him. It was an impulsive act. Whenever I saw someone that needed help, I jumped up to the task.

            Erwin stared up at me as I pushed him into place. “Well, there aren’t a lot of people out there like you.” I ignored his comment, returning to my seat. When everyone was still, he placed his elbows on the table, gazing at each of us. “So, we meet again.”

            “I’m not here to catch up,” Levi said right after. “I only want to know one thing, and that’s if you have any information to give us regarding Kenny. If you don’t, we’ll leave.”

            I gave him a sideways glance, because weren’t we supposed to figure out if Kenny had manipulated him into leaving the underground? Or was this his way of approaching the matter at hand? If it was, I wasn’t following.

            Farlan must have felt the same way, because he turned to where Erwin sat and said, “That’s not all we’re here to discuss.”

            Erwin raised an eyebrow, lacing his fingers together. “What else could you want to discuss with me?”

            “Why did you let me escape that night?” I asked. His startling blue eyes darted to my face, and I could see surprise in them, so I kept going. “You left me alone in that room long enough for me to climb out of the window. It also took you a while to send your men after me. It just doesn’t seem right.”

            He sat back in his wheelchair and I could make out his ribs through the light-blue button down shirt he was wearing. How much weight had he lost? “Why does that even matter to you? The fact is you were able to escape.”

            “It matters,” Farlan stated seriously. “The way you disappeared from the underground never made much sense to any of us. You were gone for almost a year before we tracked you down, and when we did, you would only spare us a few minutes of your time. It’s like you did a complete one-eighty. You weren’t the same person, and even if we were suspicious about the whole thing, you kept us away. So, in the end, we had to come to terms with it. Levi stepped up to become leader, and the rest of us followed him, but now I think we’d all like to know the truth.”

            I watched as Erwin went from a calm, calculating man, to a man with so much pain in his eyes, I had to look away.

            “I never thought it would last this long,” he said, his voice empty of any emotion. “I never would have left the underground of my own free will, and if I ever came into money, I would have helped all the people who counted on me as their leader, but I wasn’t given a choice. Kenny showed up one night, and to keep him away from Levi, I took him to a place I knew we wouldn’t run into him. I suppose that was my mistake, because that’s where he used chloroform to knock me out. When I woke up, I was locked up in a basement.”

            Without thinking, I reached out and put my hand over his, giving it a gentle squeeze. When I realized what I had done, I couldn’t even bring myself to care. None of this had made any sense, and Levi and Farlan had once trusted this man completely, so the story that he was telling us rang true. All this time the mastermind behind this had been Kenny.

            Erwin looked up at me for a second, and then dropped his eyes. “Don’t be too supportive. I had every intention on giving you to Kenny. I had dealt with this torture and pain long enough. I wanted a way out, so when he gave it to me, I clung onto it with everything I had. But then you came to the masquerade ball and I saw the way Levi looked at you…” He smiled, but there was no happiness behind it. Was he even capable of feeling anything other than sadness? “I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I prayed that Kenny would end it all after I allowed you to escape, but of course that was nothing more than wishful thinking.”

            Instead, Kenny had caused him a spinal cord injury that had left him paralyzed from the waist down. He would never walk again, and he hadn’t done anything to deserve it. Yes, he had been willing to help Kenny get his hands on me, but in the end he hadn’t gone through with it. Under the circumstances he was in, I could understand why he had considered it. How many years of torment had he endured? Desperate times called for desperate measures.

            “I don’t know everything you’ve been through,” Levi said, “but I believe you.”

            Erwin eyed him. “Some would say that you trusting me would be a stupid move on your part.”

            “We never said we trusted you,” Farlan retorted. “We believe you, that’s all. But you’re not helping your case.”

            “I can’t say that I mind,” Erwin said. “I’ll never be able to regain your trust, and even if I managed it, I wouldn’t be capable of reverting back to the person I once was, to the person you knew. After everything I’ve been through, it’s a miracle that I’m still able to think for my own.”

            When I released his hand, he jerked away from me, an expression of fear crossing his face. I looked at him in confusion, but he averted his eyes. Was that his natural reaction now? Was he afraid? Back when I was stuck in his mansion, he had seemed so confident. Was that nothing more than a façade?

            “What did Kenny do to you?” I said, more to myself than to him.

            “You should ask him that yourself?” Gunther uttered as he walked up to our table. What was he doing in here? He was supposed to be outside with Erd and Auruo.

            “Gunther?” Levi asked right before he shot up to his feet. He looked like he had realized something.

            “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Gunther muttered, and then he turned to Erwin, taking hold of the handgrips of his wheelchair. He leaned forward, keeping eye contact with Levi as he whispered, “You’ve been a bad boy, Erwin.”

            Shock threatened to render me speechless as I gazed upon a man I had come to trust. He had this wicked gleam in his eyes as he grinned maliciously at Levi. “It was you,” I said. “The traitor who tipped Erwin off was you.”

            Gunther regarded me with a shrug. “It was me, though our little Erwin here didn’t know who the traitor was. I work for Kenny.”

            “You goddamn bastard,” Levi growled.

            “Does that surprise you, Levi? Were you not expecting it to be me? I admit that I put on quite a show, but you never suspected me in the least. I had to spend these last couple months at the town house biting my tongue, playing along with your so-called ‘plans’. I had to wait until Kenny gave the go ahead, which he did once he found out his little blonde pet was going to rebel against him.”

            “You told Kenny of our plans to meet here today,” Farlan said.

            “Of course I did,” Gunther responded. “He was thrilled that he would finally get his hands on Eren.” At that, Levi pulled out the knife he had in his back pocket. “What are you going to do, Levi? Are you going to stab me in the middle of a café full of people?”

            “I have no problem with that,” Levi said, “because if you lay one finger on Eren, I’ll be happy to drag this knife across your throat.”

            Gunther barked out a laugh, slipping his hand into his coat. I thought he was going to retrieve a weapon he had hidden, but what he pulled out was a cell phone. He pressed a button and then said, “You’re on speaker phone.”

            “Good.” Kenny’s voice filled the small area we sat in. “Why don’t you start talking, sweetheart?”

            My heart was beating so fast in my chest, it was the only thing I could hear, then the sound of Isabel’s voice made it stop—or at least that’s what it felt like.

            “I-I’m okay,” Isabel said. Her voice sounded hoarse, like she had been screaming. “Don’t give them Eren. He saved me once. Now it’s my turn.”

            Farlan launched himself at Gunther faster than I could take in his movements. Everyone around us gasped as he withdrew the gun Flagon had given him from the waistband of his jeans. “I’ll fucking kill you! How could you let him take Isabel? Why would you do this? We trusted you!”

            Gunther, who was now pinned on his back, laughed. “She’ll be fine if you hand over Eren.”

            “That’s not going to happen,” Levi said, going to kneel next to where Gunther lay. “Eren is staying put, and you’re going to tell us where Kenny has Isabel.”

            “No can do,” Gunther murmured, smiling.

            “Let him up,” I said, my voice sounding far away. If I didn’t go with him, Kenny was going to hurt Isabel, and the police would have enough time to come and arrest Farlan and Levi. If that happened, no one would be able to help all the people that relied on Levi. “I’ll go.”

            Levi turned his head towards me. “No.”

            I knew everyone in the café had their eyes on us. Someone had already announced that they had called the cops, but to me, their voices were nothing but white noise in the background. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion, yet at the same time, incredibly fast.

            “That’s not your decision to make,” I said, standing up. “Farlan, let him up.”

            Gunther laughed long and hard. “That’s a good boy, Eren. Kenny will be so happy with you.”

            I looked down at him. “Fuck Kenny, and fuck you. I’m not doing this to please him. I’m doing this for Isabel. Farlan, please let me do this. Let him up.”

            “No,” Levi ordered.

            Farlan stared at me as though he was in physical pain as he eased back. “I’m sorry, Levi,” he whispered.

            “Now get up,” I said to Gunther, who happily got to his feet. When he reached for the hand grips of Erwin’s wheelchair, I muttered, “No. Kenny wants me. Leave Erwin alone. Do you hear me, you fucking bastard?! Leave him alone!” I stared at the cell phone that had clattered to the floor, knowing that Kenny was listening in on all of this.

            “Let him be,” Kenny said, his voice ringing loud and clear in the silence that had overtaken everyone in the café. “Just bring the boy. As for the girl, I’ll make sure she gets back to the town house once I have him. You have my word.”

            “Your word means shit to me!” Levi shouted, his whole body shaking. He turned towards me. “Don’t do this, Eren. You can’t do this.”

            I reached out and grabbed both of his hands. I brought them up to my lips, pressing kisses to his knuckles. “I’m sorry, but I’ve made my decision.”

            “No. Eren, no.” He took my face in his hands. His fingertips felt cool against my heated skin. “We’ll figure this out. You don’t have to go. We’ll find a way to get Isabel back. I promise you that.”

            “Levi,” I said, leaning into his touch. “Keep everyone safe.” I stepped away from him, watching his hands drop to his sides.

            “No,” he pleaded, his voice barely audible. “Don’t ask this of me. I’ll make you stay if I have to. I won’t let you go.”

            I offered a small, sad smile. “Please respect my decision.”

            Gunther grabbed my wrists, pinning them behind my back. He dragged me toward the front entrance of the café and I kept my gaze locked on Levi, making sure he didn’t try to come after me. I wasn’t only doing this for Isabel. I was doing this for all of them. If Kenny got what he wanted, then he would leave them alone. I was sure of that.

            The last thing I saw before the door shut behind me was Levi staring after me with tears running down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, as you can now see, this is why I couldn't hate Erwin at all. He was taken out of the underground against his will, and was brutally tortured into submission by Kenny. I was going to go into more detail about that, but then I didn't want to. Poor Erwin. Seriously.
> 
> Also, as you may have gathered, Gunther is the traitor. I'm sorry for making it him, but it had to be someone that Levi was close to and Erd and Auruo just didn't seem capable of betrayal at all, so I went with the next choice. 
> 
> As for Eren, I feel so bad for my baby, but when I thought about Eren's personality, I knew that he would willingly give himself up for someone he loved--in this case, Isabel. As you probably know, Levi is heartbroken, and let me tell you, he's going to wreak havoc in the upcoming chapters, because no one fucks with Eren or his family. Trust me, he'll have little to no self-control from here on out. 
> 
> People who get in his way are gon' die.
> 
> Anywho, thank you all for remaining so supportive and for reading! I love you all.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have completely forgotten how reading can help so much with writer's block. Bless authors and bless fanfic writer's, because without them, I would not be writing this fanfic. 
> 
> I can't think of anything else to say. I blame it on the fact that it is now 3 o'clock in the morning and my brain is no longer in proper functioning mode. 
> 
> But, go on and read.

I never thought that the simple act of keeping me enclosed in a tight space filled to the brim with utter darkness would somehow make me question my sanity. How long had I been here? The answer to that question teetered on the edge of my grasp, eluding me, because time doesn’t exist in this little hell that Kenny has created for me.

            Sitting up, I winced, my hand automatically shooting down to grasp my side. I clenched my teeth against the groan of pain that wanted to escape me. No. I wouldn’t give the bastard the satisfaction of seeing me suffer, because I knew all too well that he was watching me. Just like an interrogation room, there was a one-way mirror in here. It was too dark to make it out now, but soon enough, Kenny would turn on a bright light that would alert me that my next round of torture was about to begin.

            God, I was tired. My limbs felt heavy and limp, impossible to move for an extended period of time. I wanted to sleep away the ache that was now my body, but Kenny had a habit of coming in here the second my eyes closed, and I didn’t feel like dealing with his shit just yet.

            A part of me wanted to sit here and act like I could handle this, but could I? All the adrenaline I had experienced had died away what felt like weeks ago, but I couldn’t be sure how long it had been since Kenny shoved me into this tiny room. For all I knew, it could have only been a few days. If that were the case, then I had greatly overestimated my ability to deal with pain.

            The torture that Kenny had bestowed on me put what I had seen in the movies to shame. He had used my body as a living punching bag, and when he was tired of making his fists collide with my flesh; he would opt for a whip. But it didn’t end there. Knives were his next implements of torture, and I was sure that my arms and back had seen the worst of it all. Fuck, I must’ve looked awful.

            I scrambled across the concrete flooring until I came to rest on the sorry excuse of a cot mattress that was my place for sleeping. My whole body sagged into the course material, and I knew that my attempts at warding off sleep wouldn’t last much longer. I just hoped that Kenny would let me get some sleep, if only for a while. I deserved that much, right?

            No. According to him, I didn’t deserve shit, because I had been “a bad pet”—one that he was determined to break. He had guaranteed me that I would break eventually, that it didn’t matter how long it took, because he was willing to carry out this torture for years to come. He had proved that with Erwin, who after years of torment, finally caved into the man.

            I fucking hated Kenny. I hated him more than I thought it was possible to hate another human being, but he had showed me that there was no end to hatred.

            As my consciousness began to ebb away, the image of Levi filled my mind’s eye. I didn’t like thinking about him for too long, because the pain I felt whenever I did made those lashings Kenny gave me feel like a walk in the park.

            I missed him. The more time I spent away from him, the more this hole in my chest expanded.

            What was he doing right now? Was he okay? I knew he blamed himself for this, even when it was my decision to leave.

            “Levi,” I whispered to the darkness that wrapped its cold arms around me in a deathly grip.

            I squeezed my eyes shut, but his face refused to leave me. I wanted to trace those sharp cheekbones with my fingertips, wanted to run my fingers through the dark locks of hair that led to the coarse undercut. If there were a way for my thoughts to reach him, I would want to reassure him that none of this was his fault, because it wasn’t. I made my bed, and now I was lying in it.

            With that thought plaguing my mind, sleep overcame me, and I welcomed it with open arms.

\---

            I woke up to the feel of Kenny’s boot being shoved into my face. I tried to turn away from it, but my body screamed out in protest. Every part of me was in agony and I must’ve made some type of expression, because the man standing inches away from me was smiling—an indication that he was enjoying every little bit of this.

            “Wakey wakey,” he said, the smile never leaving his face. “Are ya hungry?”

            I didn’t want to eat anything he had to give me. “Fuck you.” I fully expected him to kick me for my retaliation, but instead he slipped the tip of his boot beneath my chin, coaxing my face up to his.

            “You’re just like him. He was a stubborn fuck. It’s no wonder he fell for a little shit like you.”

            Was he talking about Levi? Did he make Levi suffer through stuff like this? For some reason the thought of Kenny laying a finger on Levi brought back animation to my otherwise lifeless limbs.

            “Whoa now,” Kenny uttered as I launched myself at him. He laughed, a horrible, cackling sound that I instantly hated. “Is that what gets you going? Just the mention of my nephew does it for you, ay?”

            “Don’t even talk about him.”

            He sidestepped my next attempt at pouncing on him, shoving me down onto the cold cement with a simple push of his foot. When I was lying flat on my back, he put his boot-clad foot on the center of my chest. “When I’m done with you, you would kill him on my command.”

            I gritted my teeth, trying to shove his foot off of me, but I was weak. My body wasn’t responding to my insistent demands. It wasn’t doing anything to help me in this moment and that aggravated me to no end. I wanted to have the strength to fight Kenny, to kill him, yet here I was, sprawled at his feet; completely helpless and at his mercy.

            “I’ll never obey you,” I bit out through clenched teeth. “I don’t care if you wind up killing me. I’d rather die than be your fucking pet.”

            He knelt down beside me, reaching down to grasp my chin in his cold hand. He turned my face toward him, smirking. “Ah, if weren’t so pretty, I would have killed you long ago. If you’re waiting for the sweet release of death, you’re going to be waiting for a long time, my pet. I don’t plan on ending your life anytime soon.”

            I yanked my chin away from his grip. “I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you for everything you’ve ever done to Levi.”

            “He was stubborn,” Kenny commented, “but he was obedient—loyal even. For a long time, the way of life I’d shown him was his only way of living. That is until Erwin Smith came into the picture. That blonde bastard planted a seed in Levi, told him that he had a choice, that he didn’t have to do as I said. Of course, it took a while for that seed to sprout, but Erwin was all the willing to help it grow.”

            For once in my life, I was grateful for Erwin’s existence. He had helped Levi escape Kenny, and for that, I owed him, because Levi didn’t deserve this kind of life.

            “I’m glad Erwin got him away from you,” I muttered.

            In response to that, Kenny tsked. “I didn’t know what was happening. At the time, Levi was able to roam free in the underground. It never once occurred to me that he would try to leave. He wouldn’t have either, if it weren’t for that blonde piece of shit. But what really did Levi in was when he found Isabel. He brought her back to me, hoping I’d shelter her and what not. I wasn’t against it, seeing as I could use her for my own benefit, but once Levi saw that I was going to hurt her the same way I was hurting him, something clicked. That’s when he realized that—”

            “That you were a fucking monster,” I finished for him.

            “You could say that. Either way, he escaped with Isabel with the help of Erwin. They kept well hidden for a long time, and by the time they reemerged, Erwin had created an army.”

            So that was why Kenny kidnapped Erwin. It was exactly as Farlan had said: It was his form of revenge on the blonde man. He wanted him to pay for taking away his favorite pet. It was sick how he thought of Levi, but there was no denying it now.

            “He’ll never be your pet again,” I said, pouring salt onto the wound, because I knew this still hurt him. I could see it in his eyes. He had never been able to replace Levi, and maybe that was because Levi was family. But how he could treat his nephew in such a horrible manner, I would never know.

            Kenny shrugged. “I’ll settle for you. After all, you’re the only person he’s ever loved, so it’s befitting. Now get up.” When I didn’t comply with his demand, he hoisted me up to my feet, pulling me toward him. I couldn’t even put up a fight; my body felt like it weighed twice as much as before. “As much as I would love to have some fun with you, I’ve neglected your needs for too long. You need to bathe, eat, and get a full night’s sleep before we can resume where we left off.”

            I didn’t argue with him as he dragged me out of the room and down a narrow hallway. All I could focus on was the promise of food and a shower. It felt like ages ago when I had my last meal.

            The place Kenny was keeping me holed up in was rather small. He left for long intervals of time, so maybe this was some shack out in the middle of nowhere. But I doubted shacks could house a cement room.

            “You’ll have company in a bit,” Kenny informed me, keeping a firm hold on my wrists as he lugged me up a short flight of stairs. “I think you know them.”

            My eyes shot up to his face, where a knowing smirk had uplifted his thin lips. Mikasa and Armin’s face flashed into my mind and I offered up a silent prayer that he wasn’t talking about them. Had he snagged them as they left the town house? Was that why he was willing to release Isabel so easily, because he had them?

            All my fears vanished as he pushed open double swinging doors that led to a small eating area. Sitting there around a table were Ymir and Krista. They looked up at me as I entered the room, and I received different expressions from both of them. Krista appeared appalled and surprised, while Ymir looked beyond pissed. I couldn’t tell if her anger was directed at me, or the man hustling me forward.

            “Sit,” Kenny demanded, shoving me down onto the bench in case I decided to argue with him, but that was the last thing on my mind. “I’ll be back.”

            I was surprised when he left all three of us alone, but my excitement at the prospect that I may be able to escape was short lived.

            “We’re underground,” Ymir said. “We tried escaping a week ago, but this place is a fucking labyrinth. Even if we managed to find a way out, I’m sure the door leading to the surface would be locked. One last ‘fuck you’ from our dear friend Kenny.”

            I visibly sagged in defeat, a pathetic “oh” leaving my lips. I should have known that there was no way out of this hell. It was locked up tight, and the only way I would be leaving was when Kenny considered me good and ready—when I was nothing more than a husk of my former self.

            “So,” Ymir started, “how did you end up here? You look like shit.” That earned her an elbow to the side from Krista. “What? It’s true, isn’t it?”

            I ran the pad of my index finger along the top of the metal table. I didn’t feel like explaining my situation to them. In the end, it didn’t matter how I got here. The fact was I was here, and that was that.

            Krista took pity on me, because she said, “You don’t have to tell us, Eren. Ignore Ymir. She obviously can’t see that you’ve been through a lot.”

            That reminded me of how I must look. I didn’t know how long I had been down here, but it was long enough that my skin was streaked with dirt and my hair was matted against my forehead. But when I glanced up to explain my appearance, I noticed Krista eyeing the very visible gash running up my left forearm.

            “He’s torturing you,” she murmured in a daze, a look of disgust morphing her facial features into an expression of pure hatred. “I didn’t want to believe him when he told me that he had tortured Erwin for years, but…now this…” She covered her face with her hands, shaking her head. “I never knew.”

            And Erwin had never told her. All these years, he had protected her from this shit, but obviously when he allowed me to escape, he couldn’t keep doing that.

            “He’s okay,” I said, wanting to reassure her in the only way that I could.

            She sighed. “I hope he is.”

            Ymir shook her head. “Damn. I never thought I’d see the day that I actually felt sorry for that bastard. I’ve hated him for so long, but he warned me the night you escaped. He told me to get the hell out of dodge, but I wasn’t going to leave without Krista. As you can see, that landed us in this shitty place.”

            “We didn’t find each other in time,” Krista explained. “Not before Kenny had the whole mansion on lock down in search of you. Erwin gave you plenty of time to escape. He pulled all the strings to keep Kenny from getting suspicious long after you made it over that wall.”

            Erwin. Goddamnit. If I ever saw him again, I was going to thank him. Also, apologize to him, because I had been an ass.

            “Here we go,” Kenny announced, the double doors bursting open with a swift kick on his part. He walked up to the table we sat around, depositing three trays of food in front of us. “If you don’t eat, you’ll get punished.” He was directing those words at me, but when his eyes clashed with Ymir’s, he said, “Do as you please. I don’t give two shits if you die.”

            Ymir narrowed her eyes, picking up the plastic spork to bury it into the egg noodles in front of her. She brought the food to her mouth, chomping on the noodles loudly. “Sorry to disappoint you, Kenny, but I’m not planning on keeling over today.”

            He ignored her, pointing down to my tray with his finger. “Eat.” With that, he left the room. Hopefully, he would be gone for a long while. Every time I was forced to see his face, I hated him even more. But more than that, I hated myself—for everything that I had caused, for all the people that had died because of me. It ended here.

            “The food isn’t _that_ bad,” Ymir joked, taking in my sullen expression. “You don’t have to look like your family dog just died.”

            I tried to form a smile on my lips, but it turned into a grimace instead. Sixteen—probably seventeen now, actually—years old, and this was my fate. Whether I believed it or not, one day, I would break. I would become Kenny’s pet, and would obey him like one. Even if I believed in Levi, I didn’t want him to come and rescue me, because that meant more people would die because of me.

            My attention was yanked out of my thoughts as Krista put her hand over mine. As our eyes met, she said, “You really should eat some, Eren. You look like you haven’t eaten in a while.”

            I glanced down at the tattered remains of my black shirt, able to see my ribs poking through. “Yeah.” That was all the response I could muster up, so I quickly picked up my spork to show her that I was going to follow her advice.

            As I ate, I concentrated on anything but the taste of the food that was currently in my mouth. It had to have been a while since I last consumed anything, because I couldn’t stomach this. I felt nauseous as I swallowed the lump of noodles down, but even then, it felt lodged in my throat, like it was doing everything in its power to stay away from my stomach.

            “Are you okay?” Krista asked in concern.

            I was given no time to reply to her, because this food wasn’t going to stay down. In one final act of reserving the last shred of dignity I had, I darted out of the room into the hallway, finally allowing myself to hurl up the remnants of my dinner. But even after the deed, I was left dry heaving, bent forward as I helplessly clutched at my stomach. After what felt like a small eternity, I regained control of my body.

            Stumbling away from the bodily fluids, I fell unceremoniously onto my ass. Well, there went my dignity. I was officially pathetic in every aspect. Maybe this was how Kenny worked. He stripped away everything you were until you were nothing but an empty vessel. Then, that’s when his torture truly came into affect.

            “Oh, fuck,” Ymir said in disgust as she traveled out into the hallway with slow steps, pinching her nose closed between thumb and index finger. “That really stinks.”

            I looked up at her from where I sat. “Sorry.”

            She stared at me for a second before she heaved out a breath. “I know you’ve been beaten and starved, and that you’re probably feeling all sorts of self-loathing right about now, but none of this is your fault. Kenny is the definition of a sadistic asshole. He gets his kicks putting others in pain. Right now, he is focusing all that sick energy towards you, but if you break, he wins.”

            I wanted to ask her how she expected me not to break under the circumstances I was in. Even if I fought, where did that leave me? I had no chance of escape. If dwelling in this hellhole was all my fighting would reward me, then maybe I was better off giving in. Wait…did I really believe that? Did I want to give in to Kenny?

            Hell no.

            I wanted to get out of here. I wanted to see Levi. I wanted to see Isabel and Farlan, and Mikasa and Armin. I wanted to see my little family once again. But above all that, I wanted to live out the remainder of my life as I saw fit. I didn’t want to be someone’s pet, let alone Kenny’s. Fuck him.

            “Help me up,” I demanded, because I had used up the last bit of my energy to get reacquainted with my dinner.

            Ymir rolled her eyes, but leaned down to grab onto my wrist. She helped me to my feet, steading me as I almost lost my balance. “Take it slow, Speedy Gonzales, and I don’t just mean now. You’re going to have to eat slow, too; let your stomach get used to food again.”

            “I can do that,” I confirmed, letting her steer me in the direction of the eating area. Once we were inside again, she helped me back to the table, and just the smell of the egg noodles made me want to hurl all over again.

            “Plug your fucking nose,” Ymir said.

            Without thinking, I did as she told me, plugging my nose. As the smell of the noodles disappeared, I smiled, happy to see that they didn’t look half bad once I couldn’t take in the aroma of them. With my free hand, I picked up the spork I had abandoned earlier, scooping some of the noodles onto it.

            “Not that much,” Ymir instructed, waiting for me to drop some of the noodles back onto the plate. She nodded in approval. “There you go.”

            It took me a while to finish, but I managed it. I felt a bit queasy afterwards, but it wasn’t as bad as it was before. This I could handle.

            When Kenny reentered the room some time later, he glared at me. He probably had seen the mess out in the hallway, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. In the end, it didn’t matter if I explained everything to him, because he would continue his torment anyway. He would keep going until I was broke, but I wasn’t going to let that happen. I wasn’t going to allow him to break me.

            As he lifted his hand to no doubt hit me, Ymir spoke up. “He ate, you douche. He had problems in the beginning, but he ate the—” Her words were abruptly cut off as Kenny backhanded her across the face. Krista gasped, her hands moving up to block any more blows Kenny was planning to land, but Ymir pushed them away. Her gaze moved up, and I had never seen a look as murderous as hers in that moment.

            “Get up off your ass,” Kenny ordered me, completely unfazed. “You’re going to take a quick shower, because I got shit to take care of. So hurry it up.”

            I stood up to follow him out of the room, glancing back at Ymir and Krista over my shoulder. The blazing red on Ymir’s cheek stayed with me long after the double doors blocked the sight of her. She had defended me, which earned her nothing but pain. Whoever tried to help me would meet the same fate. Maybe I was nothing more than poison.

            Kenny directed me down another hallway. It looked the same as the last, narrow and gray, almost like it was made of dirt. It had a crumbled texture to it, like at any moment it could cave in onto us, but of course it never did. We made it to the end, where Kenny pushed open a white door, gesturing for me to go in ahead of him.

            “There are some clothes on the bench over there. Don’t take too long,” he said right before he slammed the door shut. I silently thanked whoever was listening that he had left me alone. The last thing I wanted was an audience as I showered off the grime that had collected on my skin.

            Undressing, I threw the offensive articles of clothing far away from me, glad to be rid of them. I walked over to the shower, which was really just a showerhead protruding from the wall. There were no curtains to enclose around me, to protect my privacy. If Kenny came back in, I would be there for all his viewing. The thought repulsed me, and I decided that I wasn’t going to linger.

            After I started up the water, I stepped into the cascade, releasing a sigh of content. My tense muscles relaxed under the warmth, but it didn’t last long, because soon every wound on my body was screaming out in agony. The heat made every slash on my flesh burn with renewed pain. Not even in these moments of solitude could I escape Kenny.

            For the first time since I’d been here, I thoroughly inspected my body, and the sight I was greeted with was not one I’d soon forget. My tan skin was littered with deep gashes, some in the process of healing, and others open and flaming red. But as my eyes raked over more of my form, I saw that there were also bruises and welts coloring my skin. There seemed to be no part of me unmarred.

            I had to get out of here. It didn’t matter what I had to do, because I knew that if I stayed here, I would break whether I liked it or not. Just like Erwin had, the strong leader of an underground gang, because the human mind could only take so much before it was shoved into dark recesses that it would never return from.

            No. I wouldn’t accept that happening to me. And that wasn’t even the scariest part of this whole thing. Once I was broken, Kenny would make me his pet. He would move me around this world like the sick puppeteer he enjoyed being. He would make me do things I would never do of my own free will, and it wouldn’t even stop there, because once he grew tired of me, he would seek someone else out. It was a never-ending cycle, but I was determined to put a stop to it.

            Lifting the bar of soap out of its holder, I rubbed it against my skin until I was covered in a thick layer of it. I would scrub myself free of him, even if it was just for the time being. It was as I was doing this that my eyes caught sight of the silver band around my ring finger. It stood out against my tan skin, promising me a life that I wanted so badly.

            I could see it so clearly too. That was the worst part.

            We would leave the underground and get married. We’d live in a house with Farlan and Isabel, because let’s face it: We were attached at the hip with those two. But we would be happy, so happy, and I truly would give anything to have that, because I loved Levi more than words could ever describe. And I longed for that life that he promised me when he slipped that ring around my finger.

            And hell if I wasn’t going to fight tooth and nail for it.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah yes. The determination is finally returning to our little Eren. Good. That's how he's meant to be--determined and willing to face whatever the fuck is thrown his way. 
> 
> Sorry I couldn't get back to everyone's comment last chapter. I've literally had no free time, and when I did, I was either writing this, or reading. So, please forgive me, because sometimes I'm a lazy piece of trash.
> 
> But, as per usual, thanks for reading, commenting, and leaving me kudos. <3


	30. Levi's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been drowning in work, so this update too 5ever to post. 
> 
> If you didn't notice, this chapter will be in Levi's POV. Next chapter will be in both Levi's and Eren's POV, and will probably be way longer than my other chapters have been. There's a lot to cover, and I'm guessing there's only five, maybe six chapters left in this fic until it's a completed work. I'm excited!
> 
> Anywho, go on and read. :)

As Farlan pulled into the parking lot of Kenny’s bar, I stared at the small building with all the resentment I felt toward the man that owned it. It had been years since I set foot on this property, but it was the one place I knew of that could lead me toward the whereabouts of Eren, and that was enough for me to lay eyes on this place once again.

            I pushed open the car door and stepped out onto the asphalt as I lifted my gaze to the red neon sign that read: _Ackerman’s_. I stared at it until it was the only thing that filled my vision. This was my last hope. I had searched everywhere else and had come up empty handed. If this ended up being another dead end, then I wouldn’t know what to do. It was the drive to find Eren that kept me going. Without that, I had nothing.

            “Do you want me to go in with you?” Farlan asked.

            “No. Stay out here with Auruo and Erd. Cut the phone lines so the people inside have no way of contacting Kenny once I’m through with them.” I left without saying more, striding up to the front entrance. Letting out a breath, I opened up the door and moved inside. I immediately scanned the people working behind the bar. It was easy to identify the ones that knew the true nature of the man they worked for. They were the people that could give me the answers I sought.

            I walked straight up to an empty barstool in front of a tall man wearing a black tank top that revealed numerous tattoos on both of his arms. When I sat down, his eyes flicked in my direction, and it was how they slightly narrowed that told me he knew exactly who I was. This would have gone a lot more smoothly if he hadn’t recognized me.

            “What can I do you for?” the man asked, setting both his hands on the counter, spreading them wide to reveal a pistol holstered to the waistband of his jeans.

            “I’m here to see the owner of this place.” I knew Kenny wasn’t here, but I wanted to see how the man reacted. Judging by his expression, he knew enough not to tell me anything about his boss.

            “He’s not in,” the man said, his tone cold.

            “Mind telling me where I could find him?”

            He sighed in exasperation. “Listen—”

            I cut him off as I quickly reached into my coat to pull out a pocketknife that was now protruding from the center of his right hand. Blood seeped onto the counter, but he hadn’t made a sound as the blade penetrated his palm. “Oh, I’m sorry. You’re under the impression that I was giving you a choice.” I put my fingertips on the handle of the knife, pressing down on it until he grit his teeth. When the tip of the blade pierced through his flesh until it made contact with the top of the counter, I said, “If you know where he is, I strongly advise you to tell me.”

            “Fuck you,” he retorted, his dark eyes darting from left to right. “You better get the fuck out of here before you cause a scene.”

            I gripped the handle of my pocketknife, slowly pulling the blade out from his palm. “I gave you a chance to cooperate.” I hopped over the counter before he could react, reaching out to grab his shirt collar. Using the fabric gripped in my hands, I slammed his head down on the bar hard enough to get everyone’s attention. “Still think I care about causing a scene?”

            “What the _fuck_ is your problem?”

            “As of right now, you are.”

            The other workers steered clear from the side of the bar I was currently standing in—except for two. Unlike the man I was holding down, they didn’t have any visible weapons, which was why I had chosen to confront him out of the three of them.

            “I don’t know what you want,” the man said, moving his hands closer to his waistband.

            “You know exactly what I want. I’ll give you two minutes to tell me where I can find Kenny.”

            “I don’t fucking know where Kenny is.”

            “What about you two?” I asked the other two men who were creeping up on me. “You have any idea where Kenny is?”

            “No,” one replied, a man with dirty-blonde hair. “All you’re doing is scaring off the customers. Why don’t you get out of here already? We don’t have the information you want.”

            Reaching down, I grabbed hold of the gun the man I held captive was still inching his hands toward, pulling it out of its holster to point it at the blonde. “Are you sure about that?”

            He put his hands up, his steps faltering. With an expression that resembled a deer caught in headlights, he said, “Kenny never tells us where he is. If we want to get ahold of him, we have to contact Gunther. I swear that’s all we know, so please just leave us the fuck out of this.”

            “Goddamnit, Colton,” the man I was holding down spat. “You looking to get us killed? Keep your damn mouth shut!”

            “Colton,” I said, “I’ll spare you if you recite Gunther’s phone number right now. You have ten seconds.”

            Colton glanced from me, to the man who had told him to keep his mouth closed. He didn’t know what to do, that much I could tell just by looking at him, but my patience was wearing thin and they had caught me at one of my worst times. Even if I was against needless death, men associated with Kenny were garbage at best. They may look innocent, but I knew better. If he didn’t give me an answer, I wouldn’t think twice about shooting him.

            “Five seconds,” I told him. “This is your last chance, Colton.”

            “Fuck! Okay, okay. It’s four zero nine, eight one two one.”

            “If you’re lying, I will come back for you. Don’t think I won’t.”

            Suddenly the man beneath me threw his head back, attempting to slam it against my face, but my reflexes were fast. I dodged it with ease, grabbing a handful of his hair to yank his head back far enough to expose his throat.

            “I could kill you,” I said, looking down into his eyes, “but unlike the man you work for, I’m a monster of a different kind.” With that, I smashed his head into the counter, knocking him out cold. My gaze drifted up to the other two. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay out of my way.” They continued to stare at me as I hoisted myself up and over the bar, but none of them attempted to lift a finger against me. I had taken out their strongest man, so the odds of them bringing me down were slim. At least they weren’t stupid enough to try.

            When I walked out of the front entrance, Farlan pushed off the car we had driven here in. He scanned me from head to foot, sighing in relief when he saw that no harm had come to me.

            “Well?” he asked once I was in front of him.

            “I was able to get Gunther’s number.” I pulled open one of the back doors, leaning down to stare straight into brilliant blue eyes that didn’t waver for one second. Good. “Here’s where you come into play, Blondie.”

            Armin tilted his chin up, trying to appear bigger than he was. “What do you need me to do?”

            “You’re good at hacking into stuff, am I right?” I asked, watching him nod in response. “If I gave you Gunther’s cell phone number, would you be able to hack into his account?”

            “Yes. I would have to find out what cell phone carrier he has, but after that, it would be pretty simple.”

            I placed my hand on the top of his head. “I knew I brought you along for a reason. I want you to look at all his incoming calls and see who has called him the most. That’s most likely Kenny.”

            “Okay. All I need is his number,” he said. “Do you want to know where he is? I could track him.”

            “You do that, and I’ll be glad to pay him a little visit.” After that, I told him the number Colton had given me. As he began to type the information into his laptop, I slammed the door shut, turning toward Farlan. “Let’s get out of here before more of Kenny’s men show up.”

            “Got it,” he responded, walking around the hood of the car to get into the driver’s seat. I followed after him, listening to Auruo mutter something about how he was stuck in the backseat with children. I rolled my eyes, because he was the second youngest in the car.

            It didn’t take Armin long to hack into Gunther’s Verizon Wireless account. It took him even less time to narrow down which number could be Kenny’s. He was too smart for his own good, and I knew it had been a bad idea to bring him along with me on this wild goose chase, but I was desperate. I knew what I appeared like on the outside: calm and collected. But the pain I experienced whenever I thought of Eren was enough to bring me to my knees. But I couldn’t let it. I had to find him.

            “Out of the three numbers I suspect are Kenny’s,” Armin said, “I can’t track one.”

            “That’s him,” I muttered. “It doesn’t matter. Gunther will have the information we need. Were you able to track him?”

            “Yeah.” He leaned in between the two front seats, setting his laptop down on the center console. He had pulled up a map on his screen, and used his mouse cursor to point to a small area not far from where we were. “That’s the address he’s at right now.”

            I turned my head to look at Farlan. “We have to make a pit stop before we go after Gunther.” I gave Armin a sideways glance. “This is where we part ways, Blondie.”

            “What?” he snapped. “You can’t drop me off somewhere now. I can still help you.”

            “You’ve done plenty.”

            To my surprise, he grabbed hold of my shoulder, digging his fingertips into my coat. “I know you love Eren, but he’s been my best friend since we were toddlers. If there’s anything I can do, then I want to be here to do it. I don’t care if I’m in danger. I can’t just sit around my house and wait anymore. It’s been two weeks since—”

            “I know how long it’s been,” I growled, cutting him off. “If anything happens to you, Eren would be devastated. So as much as you want to help, I can’t take you past this point.”

            “Stop the fucking car!” Armin demanded. When Farlan looked to me to see what he had to do, I nodded. He pulled over on the side of the road, and not two seconds later Armin was out and yanking my door open. I expected him to hit me with all the anger he must have been feeling, but instead he grabbed the gun I had stolen from the man back at the bar.

            “Hey now,” Auruo warned. “What are you planning to do with that?”

            Armin didn’t answer him, his eyes never leaving my face. “You still don’t know how to work a gun, but I do. My dad has taken me out deer hunting since I was a boy. I have impeccable aim. I’m not asking you to bring me inside where Gunther is at, but don’t leave me in the dark, either. Hell, leave me in the car, for all I care. But don’t send me away.”

            “You could die,” I told him in a matter-of-fact tone.

            “So could you.”

            “I’m prepared to die for Eren.”

            He leaned in. “And so am I.”

            “For fuck’s sake,” Auruo said. “I’ll put you out of your misery right now, if you’re so eager to kick the bucket, you little blonde brat.”

            I held my hand up to silence everyone. “If you want to lay down your life for your best friend, then I won’t be the one to stop you, but you will stay in the car with the gun. Don’t even try to follow after us, or I’ll throw you in the trunk. Are we clear?”

            Armin smiled and threw his arms around me. “Yes, we’re clear! Thank you!”

            “You may die today, yet you’re thanking me.”

            “Yeah, call me crazy.” He leaned back, giving me one final smile before he returned to the backseat.

            Farlan steered the car onto the main road again, staring at the map on the laptop screen with an intensity that told me he didn’t know what to make of my decision. He wasn’t the only one questioning it. So was I. Armin may be a good shot, but there were five bullets in the chamber of that gun, and I knew there would be a lot more of Kenny’s men where we were going.

            None of us spoke as we continued to make our way toward our destination. The only thought on my mind was Eren, and the numbing pain that was slowly consuming me reappeared with a vengeance. I knew what Kenny was doing to him, how he must be suffering at this very moment. The longer it took me to find him, the more torture he would have to endure.

            “Do you have anything to restrain Gunther with?” I asked Farlan.

            “Yes. I brought some supplies. It’s all in the trunk.”

            I squeezed my eyes shut, leaning my head back. “Good, because he’s coming back with us. I’m going to make him go through everything Eren is going through.”

            “You’re going to torture the information out of him?”

            “I’ll do anything I have to, if it means finding out where Kenny is keeping Eren.”

            “What are you going to do once you know where he is?” Armin asked.

            “Go after him,” I said. “Kill anyone who dares to get in my way.”

            Farlan turned onto a narrow dirt road, easing his foot off the gas pedal so that we were going twenty-five miles per hour. “We’re almost there. How are we going to go about this? If the men back at the bar are on the look out for you, then I’m sure all the men here will be too. We can’t just walk in there.”

            “We can’t,” I said, “but I can, and I will.”

            Auruo leaned forward and snatched the laptop from off the center console, practically chucking it onto Armin’s lap. “Now wait just a minute. You aren’t planning on going in there alone, now are you? Because I won’t allow it.”

            “I’m not going in alone. Farlan is coming with me. You and Erd will stay behind with Armin.”

            At that, Auruo glared at said boy. “Look at what you did, because you insisted on coming. I should shove my foot up your ass. In fact, turn around.”

            “That’s enough, Auruo,” I said. “You will stay behind, and will protect Armin at all times until me and Farlan return.”

            He grumbled something under his breath, but nodded in agreement. That’s all I needed as a confirmation that he would do what I had asked of him. He was loyal, which was why he was one of my top men.

            In the back of my mind, I thought of Gunther, and how at one point, not so long ago, I had thought he was loyal as well. And now we were on our way to hunt him down for information that I knew he had. All the years we had spent together in the underground meant absolutely nothing to me now, because the sting of betrayal would never fade. It was because of him that Eren was taken away.

            “Here we are,” Farlan announced, stopping the car a ways back from the place Gunther was currently in, which looked like some sort of nightclub. He turned toward me in his seat. “You ready?”

            “Come on,” was the only response I offered him.

            We both got out of the car at the same time, and he came over to stand by my side. I didn’t know how many men were in there, but I knew that the chances of us making it out of there unhurt weren’t great. Even with that knowledge, I wasn’t going to stop until Eren was safe.

            “Looks like it’s packed,” Farlan said. “There are a lot of cars.”

            “We’ll use that to our advantage.” I headed toward the back entrance as I spoke. “If there’s a crowd, we’ll blend in amongst them while we search for Gunther. Once we find him, we get back to the car.”

            “All right.”

            On my guard, I opened the door that was illuminated by the green EXIT sign above it, and peered inside to see an empty hallway. There were two directions to pick from, but our best bet was to the right. There seemed to be less commotion coming from that side.

            I signaled for Farlan to follow me inside, slipping my hand into my coat pocket as I made my way down the hallway. My fingertips brushed against my pocketknife, which wasn’t much of a weapon at all, but I could take out a large number of men with it. I was a skilled fighter—one of the only things I was grateful to Kenny for. He taught me everything I knew.

            “If we’re attacked,” I said, “strike to kill.”

            Farlan gave me a quick glance. “I guess we’re not fucking around.”

            “No. Our lives are on the line. Here, it’s either kill, or be killed. You know the drill.”

            “Yeah, I get it.”

            Up ahead, the hallway curved to the left. I could hear voices coming from that direction, but up until now, I hadn’t spotted anyone. Where the fuck was the main room? That’s where Gunther would be.

            “Shit,” Farlan whispered beside me. “There are two men behind us. They must have seen us come in.”

            I quickly looked over my shoulder, taking in the sight of the men. Their intent was clear in the way they were hurrying toward us. “Take the one to my left,” I said right before I turned around. The men never paused, rushing at me with murderous expressions. They didn’t even look in Farlan’s direction. “So it’s me you want.”

            “Sorry to intervene,” Farlan said, grabbing one of them by the arm. He whipped the man around, planting a kick against the small of his back, sending him flying. “Strike to kill, huh? Fuck.” I could see the hesitation in his eyes, but he was quick to impale the man in the side of the neck.

            “Now it’s your turn,” I told the man that was sizing me up. “Go ahead. I’ll give you one shot.”

            He reacted to my words, charging at me with a knife that put mine to shame. But he was too cocky, and it was a little too easy to dodge his attack. When he realized that he missed his mark, it was too late. I had already dragged the blade of my knife across his throat.

            “We have to hurry,” I said. “They have walkie talkies. There are probably more men on the way.”

            We ran forward, and I had to wonder if this was some event that Kenny was hosting. He threw plenty of parties for his followers back when I was still under his ruling. He liked to play the part of the kind, yet unforgiving leader that everyone knew him to be. Though it was only the fools that he thrived on that believed him to be kind. The smart ones knew he was ruthless.

            “Dance floor up ahead,” Farlan said.

            I glanced at the immense crowd we were nearing, knowing that if we were separated, it would be almost impossible to find each other again. “Stick close to me.”

            “It would be easier to find Gunther if we spread out.”

            “No. If we do that, I’ll have no way of knowing if you get spotted. We’ll find him together.”

            The crowd closed in on us, people pressing up against me as I pushed past them. The place was packed from corner to corner. Everyone was dancing to the obscene music playing overhead, seeming lost in the pulsating lights that beat down on them in a blinding rhythm that matched the bass of the song. If Gunther were here, then he had to be standing guard.

            Grabbing Farlan’s wrist, I directed him toward the front entrance. No one looked in our direction, and if they did, they seemed uninterested. These were just regular people, so what was Gunther’s business here? Was he after someone? I couldn’t imagine him being here for his own enjoyment, though he had proven to me that I didn’t know him as well as I thought I did.

            It was as we were cutting through the crowd that Farlan suddenly lifted his hand to point up ahead at the stage. There were several women dancing in cages, but my eyes zeroed in on the man standing off to the right. Gunther stood there with his hands behind his back. He had a headpiece on, meaning he could contact the rest of Kenny’s men with one simple word.

            “Fuck,” I hissed. “We’re going to have to lure him out. If he sees us, he’ll radio in more men. Text Erd. Have him call Gunther and tell him that we’re out front. We’ll nab him on his way out.”

            “Won’t he call more men in for that?”

            “No. He’s too prideful to get anyone else involved. Not if he knows we’re here for him.”

            Farlan reached into his pocket to pull out his cell phone. As he was sending the text, I dragged him forward. We had to get out of the club before Gunther did. Otherwise he would cause trouble for Erd.

            Before we walked out, I looked back to see Gunther checking his phone. That gave us five minutes. We had to move.

            Once we made it outside, I said, “We grab him and take him back to the car to restrain him. We don’t ask any questions until we get to a safe place.”

            Farlan turned to look at me. “You’re acting like it’s going to be easy. I’m not so sure. We have to be prepared for the worst.” He grabbed his knife, which was still covered in blood. “He let Kenny take Isabel, and led him to where Eren was. You need to stop underestimating him. He’s not the Gunther we thought we knew. He’s our enemy, Levi.”

            “I know.” I closed my eyes for a second, sighing. “Call Erd. Tell him to get off the property. If you’re right, then Gunther will have men with him. I can’t risk Armin’s life.”

            “You should have thought of that before you brought him,” Gunther said as he strolled out of the front entrance. How in the fuck did he get out here so fast? I lunged at him, catching him by the arm, but it was then that I saw that there were several men off to either side of us; they all had guns pointed at Farlan. “Does desperation make you stupid, Levi? Being this careless is unlike you.”

            I clenched my teeth. “Tell me where Eren is.”

            He tilted his head to the side, looking amused. “Why should I? As I see it, you’re at my mercy. Not the other way around.” I reached for my knife, causing Gunther to laugh. “I wouldn’t do that, if I were you. Or would you like to see Farlan covered in bullet holes? I could make that happen for you.”

            “You son of a bitch,” I said, letting my hands fall at my sides. “I _will_ kill you for what you’ve done.”

            “I don’t see how you’re going to do that. You should have thought this out more, or are you just winging it? How reckless of you.” He walked around me, dragging his fingertips down my left arm. “Does it kill you inside to know that Eren can’t even keep a meal down? That he’s still fighting with everything he has to keep his sanity? Or that he constantly stares down at that engagement ring you gave him? At least that’s what Kenny tells me.” He smiled, and I wanted to wipe it off with the tip of my knife.

            I clenched my hands, barely refraining myself from killing him where he stood. “What do you want from me?”

            “That’s easy,” he said, smirking, but it disappeared in a flash as a gunshot sounded.

            I whipped my head in the direction it came from, my eyes coming to land on Armin, who was standing a few feet from us. He was shaking, still holding the gun up like he hadn’t shot Gunther with it at all.

            “Get down!” I ordered him, using this opportunity to take Gunther by surprise. I knocked him back, grabbing the gun tucked in his waistband. After that, all hell broke loose.

            It felt like being smack dab in the middle of a nightmare I had no control over. My ears were ringing as guns were fired, and I turned around to take out as many men as I could, lost in a rage that blinded me to the horror surrounding me. I couldn’t look at the bodies. I didn’t want to see who was lying dead on the pavement in front of some sleazy nightclub. If I looked now, I wouldn’t be able to fight.

            Man after man dropped to the ground before me, but it wasn’t until there was no one left standing that I finally allowed myself to stop, to drop the knife that I had been clutching onto mere seconds ago.

            “Levi!” Nothing but a voice in the background. There was blood everywhere. “Levi! We have to get out of here! Come on.” A hand grabbing me by the arm, tugging me forward through the fallen men. “Dammit, Levi! Snap out of it.”

            I lifted my eyes to the man shaking me, meeting pale-blue irises. “Farlan?”

            “Yeah,” he said, his face stained in blood. “I was shot, but it only grazed my leg.”

            “What about everyone else?”

            He dropped his gaze. “Auruo…he pushed Armin out of the way at the last second. He’s…” He shook his head slowly. “He didn’t make it Levi, and if we don’t get out of here, the rest of us won’t either.”

            “We can’t leave him here.”

            “Erd already got him. We need to grab Gunther. Armin shot him in the leg, and he’s losing blood fast. If we don’t get him patched up, all of this would have been for nothing.”

            I couldn’t let Auruo’s death be for nothing. I would make Gunther pay for this. I would see that he received a fate worse than death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It hurt me so bad to kill off Auruo. It wasn't because he died in the canon universe of SnK. It was because he took his order from Levi seriously. He protected Armin until the very end. I cry blood! But still, his sacrifice wasn't for nothing. *dying elephant noises*
> 
> Oh, and just to make this clear, Levi's pocketknife isn't small. For some reason I feel like people will picture this small piece of crap pocketknife lol. Nah, son! That's not how Levi works. His pocketknife looks a little something like [this right here.](http://toolguyd.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/Coast-C22-Z-Frame-Folding-Pocket-Knife.jpg) Except with a longer blade.
> 
> Also, before I forget, if you're interested in listening to a song that reminded me of when Eren asked Levi to accept his decision to go with Gunther, listen to _Please Don't Go_ by Barcelona. You can hear it [here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WLitrGQgHw)
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading! ❤


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: emotional pain up ahead.
> 
> This chapter ended up being sadder than I intended it to be (even after I cut out the gruesome beating of Gunther). I'm sorry. :(
> 
> Go read? Yes, go read.

 **Levi** 

 

The drive back home was done in silence. No one spoke—not about the wounded man in the trunk, or the dead man lying across Armin’s and Erd’s lap in the backseat. There were no words that could lift this dread that had settled over us like an omen. Even as I continued to tell myself that this was just another casualty I had to face, it only took one look at Auruo’s lifeless body to know that wasn’t the truth. I had lost a member of my family, someone that I would never be able to replace.

            I closed my eyes against the sight, refusing to remember him this way. He had given up his life for Armin, and I wouldn’t let his sacrifice come to nothing. No matter what it took, I would avenge his death. I owed that and more to him, for all the years that he had stuck by my side. His life shouldn’t have ended this way, but like so many times before this, there was nothing I could do to change what had come to pass.

            Gunther’s words replayed in my mind as I stared at the road ahead of us. Had I been reckless? Was Auruo’s death my doing? If I had taken more precautions, could I have prevented it from happening?

            “Don’t do that,” Farlan said to me. “Stop shouldering all the blame.”

            In the backseat, Armin sniffled, so it surprised me to see a small smile on his face when I peered at his reflection in the rearview mirror. Something was off about it. “You’re a lot like Eren. Whenever Mikasa or me got into trouble, he would always blame himself. It didn’t matter how much we explained to him that it was our fault, he would still find a way to turn it back on himself.” He looked down at Auruo for a second before he turned his head to the right. “I think I’m finally beginning to understand the guilt he carries with him at all times.”

            Erd startled us all when he put his hand on Armin’s shoulder. “Guilt is a burden that everyone must live with at some point in their life. I’ve known Auruo for a long time, and he wouldn’t want you to feel this way because of the decision he made back there. I know that he was prepared to die the moment he stepped into the line of fire. No one forced his hand.”

            “But if I hadn't run out,” Armin began.

            “Levi and I would be dead,” Farlan finished. “You saved us. If you hadn’t shot Gunther, he would have killed us.”

            I knew that no explanation would rid Armin of the guilt he was feeling. Only time would ease the pain, and even then, when he looked back at this moment, he would still feel responsible for Auruo’s death—just like I would.

            Beside me, Gunther’s cell phone began to buzz. I picked it up, looking down at the screen to see an unknown number.

            “Don’t answer it,” Armin said. “You should probably leave the phone somewhere. Otherwise Kenny can use it to track us. It’s not that hard to do, and if he has money at his disposal, then he could always hire someone else to do it.”

            Rolling down the passenger window, I held out the cell phone, letting it slip from my grasp. I didn’t hear it clatter to the ground, but at the speed we were going, I knew it broke on impact. It felt like another step in the right direction, because the man in the trunk _would_ give me the answers I needed. I wouldn’t let anyone come in and prevent that from happening.

            As we got closer to where we were staying these days, Armin suddenly blurted out, “Mikasa is going to kill me for this.”

            “We had Hanji occupy her for the night,” I told him. “She’s currently at the movies with Isabel.”

            At the sound of Isabel’s name, Farlan released a heavy sigh. “I can’t be the one to tell her about Auruo.”

            “I’ll do it,” Armin offered. “He gave his life for mine, so I feel like it’s only right that I should be the one to tell her.”

            I already knew how she would react to the news. At first, she would be furious. She would shout and fume until there was nothing left to do but cry. Seeing her grieve was never an easy task. She was usually so energetic and happy, that seeing her closed off to the world was hard.

            “It’s a good thing Hanji’s new place has a basement,” Farlan said, attempting to change the subject to lighten up the mood. “We can keep Gunther locked in there for the night.”

            “I won’t be sleeping,” I informed him.

            Just the thought of lying down to rest while Eren was out there experiencing anguish at the hands of Kenny made me feel sick to my stomach. No, I couldn’t sleep. To sleep would be to waste precious time that I didn’t have. The moment we arrived at Hanji’s house, I’d deal with Gunther.

            “Exhausting yourself isn’t the answer,” Armin said. “I know you want to find Eren. We all do, but if we’re going to be of any help to him, then we’re going to have to be at our best.”

            I looked down at my bloodstained hands. There was no impulse to wash them. “If you think I could sleep, then you’re mistaken.”

            “But—”

            Erd shook his head. “Let him deal with this in his own way.”

            Armin sighed, but murmured, “Okay.”

            Twenty minutes later, Farlan pulled into Hanji’s driveway. Erd slipped out of the car once we were at a stand still, walking up to the side of the garage to enter the four-digit code into the keypad. The garage door creaked open, and Farlan drove inside.

            After he parked, Erd called for Armin to go and join him inside. I knew what he was doing, but that didn’t prepare me for Farlan reaching over the center console to grab both my hands in his. Pulling out a sanitizing hand wipe from the glove compartment, he began to clean the blood off my palms and fingers.

            “You can wash up properly inside,” he said as he worked. “I know this must be bothering you. Did you forget that I had wipes in here?”

            “No. I just didn’t feel the need to clean myself off.”

            His eyes shot up to my face, his movements coming to a stop. “What?”

            “When I was Kenny’s henchman, I was always covered in someone else’s blood. That’s where the compulsion to be cleanly came from. I never felt clean. Everything around me was dirty and repulsive. Yet”—I stared down at the stained wipe—“there is no desire to scrub away _their_ blood. The men that were helping Gunther.”

            “I know you said you weren’t going to sleep tonight,” he said in a rush, sounding worried, “but I think you should rest. Are you feeling well?” He pressed the back of his hand against my forehead. “You feel a little hot.”

            I opened the passenger side door. “I’m fine.”

            “Levi, hold on.” He was quick to follow after me as I walked to the trunk of the car. “I know you’re desperate to find Eren. I am, too. I feel responsible for letting him go that day, but…please don’t lose sight of everything around you. Don’t forget that there are people who still need you.”

            “The people in the underground?” I asked.

            “No.” He grabbed my shoulders, turning me toward him. “No, not the people in the underground. I know you feel responsible for the people residing in your territory, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m referring to Isabel and me. _We_ need you. You aren’t just our leader, Levi. You’re our family. Do you even realize how much you mean to us?”

            I searched his eyes, seeing nothing but fear there. After a long while, I said, “I’ll sleep some. Just help me get Gunther down to the basement.”

            Farlan knew me well enough to know that there were two meanings behind what I had said. I could tell by the relief on his face that he understood that I was going to be more careful from here on out. Despite the desperation I felt, I had to stop throwing caution into the wind. That could lead to more deaths, including my own.

            “Let’s get this over with, then,” he said, popping open the trunk.

            Gunther turned his head to stare up at us as the dull light overhead filtered into the dark space he was in. He wore no expression, but as I grabbed hold of his arm, the corners of his mouth lifted up into a smile. What the hell was wrong with him? How had he come to despise me this much? I couldn’t understand what I had done to earn this hatred from him.

            “Grab his legs,” I instructed Farlan, who did so without uttering a word. We hoisted him up and out of the trunk. He put up no resistance, being nothing but a limp, motionless body in our arms. Was he this quick to give up? Or had he simply accepted his fate?

            As we made our way to the basement, I couldn’t help but to look down at the man that had once been one of my closest friends. I had trusted him with everything. When had he turned to Kenny? I felt like I should’ve been able to sense some change in him when he began to loathe me, but his attitude toward me throughout the years never faltered.

            When we reached the door that led to the basement, Farlan dropped one of Gunther’s ankles to open it up. There was a staircase we had to go down, but I welcomed the extra task—anything to get my mind off of the poisonous thoughts running through it.          

            “Shit,” Farlan cursed. I looked up in time to see him rubbing at his chest. When he caught me staring at him, he said, “The fucker kicked me, but it’s nothing I can’t handle. C’mon.”

            Gunther barked out a laugh. It sounded too loud in the silence. “Well, well. What’s this?” he said in a singsong tone. “Levi, the strongest thug in the underground, is reduced to this useless mess in front of me because of some kid.” He laughed insanely, shaking his head. “It doesn’t even matter what happens to me now, because just the thought of Eren being the one to kill you is enough to bring me peace. The boy you love is going to be ordered to kill you, and you’ll let him, won’t you? You won’t lift a finger against him.”

            “Shut the fuck up!” Farlan snarled, snaking his hand up Gunther’s leg to slam his fist into his crotch, eliciting a shout. “That’s right, you shit. Keep your damn mouth closed!”

            Despite being in pain, Gunther continued to laugh. He never stopped, even as we tied him to a metal post. Farlan must’ve lost his cool while listening to him, because he punched him hard enough to snap his head to the side. Even so, Gunther simply turned his head back in our direction and spat a mouthful of blood at our feet.

            “You’re crazy,” Farlan whispered, sounding like he was saying it more to himself than to the man sitting before us.

            “As crazy as they come,” Gunther responded anyhow, smiling wide, blood staining his teeth.

            I grabbed Farlan’s arm, needing to get out. “Let’s go upstairs. He’s not going anywhere. We’ll deal with him in the morning.”    

            “Yeah.”

            We left the basement, and I told him that I was going to shower. Though, once I got into the room I was staying in, I collapsed back onto the bed. I was exhausted, both body and mind. Every part of me wanted to sleep, to shut off this pain for a few hours, but how could I do that when Eren wasn’t at my side? After he had escaped Erwin’s mansion, I swore that I would protect him.

            I had failed.

            Getting to my feet, I walked into the bathroom, quick to shut the door behind me. I undressed, the small space cold and unforgiving, raising goose bumps on my arms. I stared down at them as I tossed my clothes to the side without a care. The shower I took after that was long enough to use up all the hot water, but even then, I didn’t get out. Being under the constant flow of water pruned my skin, and somehow, seeing the wrinkles on my fingertips reminded me that I was merely human.

            For a large part of my life, I felt like I was incapable of feeling any emotion other then anger. It was only after finding Isabel that I understood that I wasn’t used to expressing myself. Being under Kenny’s ruling had trained me to remain cold and emotionless. He accepted nothing else. But even after coming to care for Farlan and Isabel, I still felt undeserving of their love. Eren had been the only one that had made me feel worthy, like I deserved happiness, even with all the awful things I had done throughout my life.

            I ran my thumb along my ring finger, thinking of how I had proposed to him. Was he clinging onto that memory now? Did thinking about it bring him relief from the torture I knew Kenny was putting him through?

            I sunk down to my knees, slamming my fists against the tile wall until my hands went numb. Why, out of all the people Kenny could have had, did he choose Eren? Did he like inflicting this pain on me? Did it satisfy him to know that he had snatched away the only person that I had let inside the walls he had forced me to build up around myself?

            “Levi!” Turning toward the source of the shout, I stood up in time to cover myself up before Isabel pushed aside the shower curtain. “Tell Farlan to let me into the basement.”

            “No,” I said, reaching behind her to grab a towel. I wrapped it around my waist as I stepped out next to her. “There’s no reason for you to go to the basement.”

            She stared at me with wide eyes that reminded me of Eren’s. I turned away from them. “No reason?!” she yelled, her voice echoing off the walls. “It’s because of Gunther that Kenny took Eren. It’s because of him that Auruo is dead. That’s plenty of reason for me to want to go down there and give him a piece of my mind. Let me hurt him, Levi.”

            “I don’t have time for this.” I walked out into my bedroom, pushing past her to get to my dresser.

            “Don’t ignore me, Levi. Don’t you dare ignore me.”

            I could hear the tears in her voice, but I was too tired to confront her. What did she want me to say? What _could_ I say? No amount of words would make this right.

            Propping my arm up on the top of the dresser, I shut my eyes, needing a moment of silence. I just wanted everything to disappear for a few minutes. It was while I was thinking this that I felt her hand wrap around my forearm. I let her turn me around, but as I gazed up at her, all the anger on her face vanished. She stared at me for a long time before she wrapped her arms around my shoulders, shaking as she sobbed against me.

            “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “This must be a lot harder on you than it is on me, yet here I am acting this way. It’s just… I still can’t believe that Gunther did this. It’s like we never meant anything to him.”

            “We didn’t,” I told her, blunt and direct. There was no point in sugar coating the harsh reality of the situation, because if we had meant anything to him, he wouldn’t be tied up in the basement.

            “I guess so.” She leaned back, catching sight of my tattered knuckles. “Levi?”

            “Hmm?”

            “Are you going to be okay?”

            I sighed. “I’ll be fine.”

            “I wasn’t talking about your hands,” she said seriously. “What I meant is: if we can’t find Eren, will you be okay?”

            I wanted to reassure her that, no matter what happened from here on out, I’d be all right in the end. But that would be a lie. My life would go on, even if we didn’t find Eren. That much was true, because time stopped for no one, but that didn’t mean that I would remain the man that she knew and loved. If I lost Eren for good, I would never be the same again.

            “I don’t think so,” I said.

            She nodded slowly, dropping her eyes to gaze at her feet. “I really love you, Big Bro. You took me in and always kept me safe—no questions asked. I could never repay you for everything you’ve done for me.”

            “You don’t have to.”

            “I know that,” she whispered, a sad smile on her face.

            I put my hand on her shoulder, hoping against all odds that the simple gesture would comfort her in some way. “You should get some sleep. It’s late.”

            “Yeah.” She leaned toward me, pressing a chaste kiss to my cheek. Then she turned away, taking a few steps in the direction of the door before she whispered, “I hope we get Eren back.”

            When she was gone, I hurriedly put on a plain black T-shirt and jeans. It didn’t matter what I had told Farlan earlier, because sleeping was out of the question. The last thing I wanted to do was waste several hours that could be spent getting information. Gunther knew everything that I needed to get Eren back. All I had to do was pry it out of him.

            Once I slipped my shoes on, I strode out of my room, making sure to be as quiet as possible. If Farlan or Erd heard me, they would offer their assistance, and I needed to go about this alone.

            When I came to the door that led to the basement, I pulled it open with a little too much force. There had always been something dangerous about giving into my anger, but if I was going to spend the next few hours beating information out of Gunther, it was best to hand the reigns of my self-control over. At least that’s what I told myself as I took the first step down the staircase.

            Before I even reached the bottom, Gunther called out, “Just couldn’t stay away, could you?”

            I didn’t bother responding to him, opting to stay quiet until I was ready to confront him. He didn’t seem to mind the silent treatment, a wide grin plastered on his face. Even after everything he had done, the mere sight of him brought back too many memories. So, for now, I kept my back turned to him.

            “What’s wrong?” he taunted in a low voice. “Can’t look at me, Levi? How pathetic. You’ve always been so weak. How did I ever look up to you as my leader?”

            “I was never your leader. I was your friend.”

            He laughed. “You let the wrong person become your friend.”

            “I suppose I did,” I said, “but I’m going to make you regret ever siding with Kenny.” Kneeling down next to him, I clasped his chin in my hand. “Before we start, do you want to tell me why that is?”

            For a second, something other then amusement flashed in his eyes, but it was gone just as fast as it had come. “Before I was part of your gang, I looked up to you. You were untouchable, a legend in the underground. I was willing to do just about anything to get your attention, which I did eventually.” He chuckled lightly to himself. “But by then, you already had _them_.”

            “Them?” I asked.

            “Farlan and Isabel. They always meant more to you than the rest of us. They always will.”

            I shoved his head back against the metal pole, clenching my teeth. “That’s why you betrayed me?”

            “You would have left us, if the opportunity ever presented itself. But you would never leave them, and I came to understand that I was done being second best. My resolve only strengthened after you fell in love with Eren. With those three at your side, the rest of us no longer mattered.”

            “That’s not true,” I snapped.

            “Oh?” He raised an eyebrow. “Then why is Auruo dead? Why isn’t Farlan?”

            I shouldn’t have played into his game, but I couldn’t stop myself from speaking. “Auruo gave up his life of his own accord.”

            “Really? Or did he give it up obeying one of your orders? From where I was standing, it looked like he pushed that little blonde kid out of the line of fire. Isn’t that one of Eren’s friends? Did one of your closest men die for someone you didn’t even know?”

            I stood up. I needed to regain control of myself.

            “You ordered Auruo to protect him,” Gunther continued, “because you couldn’t stand the thought of Eren finding out one of his best friend’s was killed while under your supervision.”

            “Stop it.”

            “Why?” he shouted. “It’s the truth, isn’t it? Armin should have been the one killed, not Auruo.”

            I whirled around and didn’t realize what I was doing until I felt my fist connect with his nose, a sickly crunch sounding out. I had broken it.

            Instead of showing any pain, Gunther laughed. It was infuriating. There had to be something wrong with him, but this would be the last time that he got a rise out of me. Pulling my hand away from his face, I retrieved my pocketknife and flipped out the blade. Nothing in his demeanor changed upon seeing it. He looked relaxed, but that soon changed after I brought it down on his wounded leg.

            He cried out, but snapped his mouth closed, cutting it short. “Nothing you do will make me reveal Eren’s location.”

            I leaned forward, putting all of my weight on the handle grip. As the blade dug deeper into his flesh, I watched his eyes squeeze shut as he attempted to hold in any sounds he may make. Soon enough, I’d break him. I wouldn’t stop until I did.

            “Are you sure about that?” I said, twisting the pocketknife around. “I have all night, and this is just the beginning.”

            He lifted his gaze to my face. “Nothing can make me tell you.”

            “We’ll see about that.”

 

\---

  **Eren** 

 

            “Hey, wake up.” A voice. It sounded far away. “Eren, come on.”

            It felt like I was drowning in a pit of thick oil. Every time I dragged in a breath, my lungs burned with the effort. Where was I? My body felt incredibly heavy. Whenever I struggled to move, my limbs wouldn’t respond. I felt boneless, like nothing but a mass of dense liquid.

            “Shit,” the voice said. “He’s lost a lot of blood. Why did Kenny send us in here? To watch him die?”

            “Don’t say that,” another voice said, sounding panicked. “We just have to stop the bleeding. As long as we do that, he’ll be fine. Here. Lift him up. Let’s take him into the washroom.”

            A loud scream penetrated my ears. It took me a long time to realize that _I_ was the one screaming, but even then, I couldn’t stop myself from crying out. My skin was on fire. It felt like thousands of needles were piercing my flesh, sending spikes of pain throughout my chest whenever I was moved.

            “S-Stop,” I pleaded. “It hurts…”

            “I know,” a soft voice said—the same person who had wanted to take me into the washroom. “We’re going to make it better.”

            I attempted to lift my right hand up, but it stayed put. “My chest.” That’s all I could manage to get out before another bolt of pain radiated throughout my entire being.   

            Was I dying?

            “Do you think he’s bleeding internally?” The first voice that had spoken to me. Why did it sound so familiar?

            “Y-Ymir?” I said.

            “That’s right,” she responded. “Kenny left, the fucking bastard. He sent us into the room he’s been holding you up in, and we found you like this. He fucked you up pretty bad. I think your ribs are broken, among other things.”

            Was that why I couldn’t breathe?

            I knew it was stupid to ask, but I asked anyway. “Am I going to die?”

            “No,” Ymir said right away. “Me and Krista are going to take care of this. Don’t worry. We’re almost to the washroom. When we get there, we’re going to clean you up. Just stay with us, Eren. Focus on me.”

            My eyelids felt as heavy as rocks, but after substantial effort on my part, I finally got them open. My vision was blurry at first, taking several minutes to clear. It took even longer for me to focus on Ymir. She was staring down at me with concern, a look I had never seen on her before. That meant that I wasn’t doing good. That’s what it had to mean.

            “My ring?” I said, unable to feel it around my finger.

            “It’s there,” Krista told me, bringing my hand up so that I could see it.

            I sighed in relief, which caused my lungs to burn. “Don’t let Kenny take it. If I die, don’t let him take it from me.”

            “You’re not going to die,” Ymir snapped. “Goddamnit, Eren. You’re strong. You can pull through this.”

            I wanted to comfort her, but I was so tired. If I let myself fall asleep, would I ever wake up again? The fear that I wouldn’t made me fight to stay awake, but it was a battle I had no hopes of winning. Darkness enclosed around me, pulling me under until it was all I could see.

 

\---

 **Levi** 

 

            It was three in the morning when Farlan found me in the basement. He stumbled down the stairs until he was face to face with me, his mouth open as if he were going to say something. But when his eyes took in the horror around him, there were no words that left his lips. He simply stared and stared. I knew what he was seeing. I was drenched in blood; it soaked my clothes, dripping off of me onto the cement flooring.

            “He’s dead,” stated Farlan, breathless.

            “Yeah.”

            He swallowed, turning his head away from the gruesome sight before him. “God, Levi, he looks unrecognizable.”

            “I know,” I said.

            “Did you really have to take it this far?”

            I flexed my fingers out. “Yes. If you knew of the things he’s done, then you would understand.”

            “Make me understand, then.”

            I looked up at him, taking a deep breath. I would never be ready for this. “I shouldn’t be the one to tell you. When she’s ready to talk about it, she’ll tell you herself.”

            His eyes widened, and I knew he understood whom I was talking about. “He did something to Isabel?”

            I nodded once.

            “Levi,” he said, his voice trembling, “please tell me you made him suffer.”

            “I did.”

            He put his hand on my shoulder, almost like he was unable to hold himself up anymore. For what felt like hours, but could have only been a handful of minutes, he just stood there staring at Gunther’s corpse. There were tears forming in his eyes, and when they spilled over, he crumpled to his knees, covering his face with his hands.

            “Fuck,” he muttered. “Fuck, Levi. I’m supposed to protect her, and I didn’t.”

            I knelt down in front of him. “This isn’t your fault. None of us could have prevented it. It happened right after we left for Erwin’s mansion. He stayed back while Auruo and Erd went to go scope out the café. They trusted him alone with her—we all did. None of us suspected a thing until it was too late.”

            “I’m glad he’s dead. I can’t even bring myself to feel sorry for what he endured at the end.”

            I put my hand on his head, not knowing how to console him. “You should go back upstairs and be with Isabel. I’m going to wake up Erd, because I was able to get Eren’s location. I’m leaving as soon as I call Flagon.”

            Farlan pushed himself up to his feet. “No.” He rubbed his face with the sleeve of his shirt. “I’m going with. I’m not leaving you alone in this. Me and you stick together until the very end.”

            “That could be sooner than you think,” I warned.

            “What part of ‘until the very end’ do you not understand? Let’s go. Eren’s waiting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to explain something, because I feel like it's unclear in the chapter (since it's in Levi's point of view and not Isabel's). If you came to the conclusion that she was raped by Gunther, then you were correct. I know it's sad. OMFG, I'm sorry. But the more I thought about how cruel and twisted Gunther really was, the more I realized that he was very much capable of something that horrible. Also, that he would want to do that, because he knew it would hurt both Levi and Farlan. He's sick that way.
> 
> Hopefully, after everything settles down, I'll be able to explain how Isabel is feeling about the whole thing. I also hope that explains why she felt the need to hurt Gunther.
> 
> I feel horrible. Especially since my poor baby Eren is in so much pain.
> 
> UGH, may I rot. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and commenting, though! I love you.


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I've had one hell of a week (last week). First, my computer crashes. It just kept freezing and lagging, and here I thought, "Restarting it will help." Nope. Wrong. Restarting it made everything worse and I couldn't even open Microsoft Word, let alone open anything. That was out of the question with how bad my computer was lagging.
> 
> Then, after my boyfriend sat down for hours trying to fix it--two days after it happened, might I add--he finally got it to work again. Not before seeing an immense amount of Ereri yaoi though. WOOOOOOW. (⊙.⊙(☉_☉)⊙.⊙)
> 
> That wasn't even the worst part about the week. The worst part was when I collapsed (fainted) from exhaustion, because I literally haven't been able to sleep well in weeks. Anyway, I'm ranting. I just hope that explains why this chapter is up late. Forgive me. I hope you guys will understand.
> 
> Also, this whole chapter is in Eren's POV.

Cold. I was so cold.

            In a moment of clarity, I realized that I was lying flat on my back. Something was pressed against my side, but I couldn’t register what it was, or who was holding it there. Whoever was beside me remained faceless, lost in the darkness behind my eyelids. Their voice sounded distorted and low. I couldn’t make out what they were saying.

            Where was I now? Why couldn’t I breathe? My chest felt thick, like someone had pumped my lungs full of syrup. I took in a breath, but the action was met with searing pain that sent a shock throughout my body. Fuck. Something was stabbing my chest, or at least that’s what it felt like whenever I attempted to move. I didn’t dare breathe deeply for fear of experiencing that pain once again; instead taking small, shallow breaths.

            “Eren? Are you awake?”

            I couldn’t respond to the familiar voice. My chest hurt too much to form coherent thoughts, let alone put words together, but that didn’t stop them from pressing on.

            “Eren? Kenny’s back. He has some of his men with him. He doesn’t know where we are, but we need to get the fuck out of here. So if you’re awake and you can walk—”

            “Of course he can’t walk, Ymir.” Krista. That was Krista. “We either carry him out of here, or we stay put.”

            Ymir cursed several times before I felt one of her arms slip beneath my knees, the other wrapping around my shoulders. “Even though you lost weight, you still weigh a fucking ton.” She turned, and the slight movement caused me to wince. I couldn’t open my eyes. Why couldn’t I open my eyes? “Stay on my heels, Krista. If you see Kenny, or anyone else, you better run. Don’t even think about staying behind.”

            “I won’t leave you and Eren,” Krista retorted. “I won’t run away.”

            “You’re a real pain in the ass sometimes, but I don’t have time to talk some sense into you, so come on.”

            We were moving, and I wanted to argue and tell her to put me down. That even if I couldn’t walk, I’d either try to, or they could leave me behind. If they had a chance to get out of here, then I shouldn’t be the one to hold them back from escaping. With the condition I was in, it was pointless to keep fighting for me. I was as good as dead. My body felt foreign, like someone else’s, and I knew that it looked even worse.

            I opened my mouth, readying myself to speak, but then Ymir stopped mid-stride and muttered, “Shit, shit. Turn around. I don’t think he saw us. Hurry up and go.”

            “Leave me.” I forced the words past my lips, my voice sounding odd, like I was out of breath.

            “Shut the fuck up, Eren,” Ymir hissed. “We aren’t leaving you, so don’t waste your energy trying to convince us to.”

            “Go back to sleep,” Krista suggested in a soothing tone. “Let us handle this.”

            But they couldn’t handle this. I knew that they were in way over their heads. If Kenny caught up with us, we were all stuck in this hell. Why should they have to suffer alongside me? They had the means to get out, and if they left me here, I could serve as a distraction. I could keep Kenny in one place long enough for them to put some good distance between us.

            “Put me down,” I urged, even when my body objected the small movement. “I won’t let you go down with me.” I took in a breath, whimpering as I exhaled. “This is your only chance to get out of here. You and I both know it. Something is going on, isn’t it? Something isn’t right, which means that he’s not paying attention to the exit.” Concentrating on my eyes, I managed to open them up, though my vision was blurry and remained that way no matter how many times I blinked. “Please, let me do this for you.”

            Krista was shaking her head, tears forming in her eyes, but I could see the look of determination on Ymir’s face. Krista meant more to her than I did, so it was her that I would have to speak to, because I knew that I could convince her to leave me behind.

            “Get her out of here, Ymir,” I said. “Drag her, if you have to, and don’t look back.”

            “Don’t tell her to do that,” Krista whispered. “Eren, we can do this. We can make it out of here, the three of us…”

            “You know that isn’t true.”

            Ymir looked from me to Krista, different emotions crossing her face in a matter of seconds. Then, she shook her head, her eyebrows pulling together. “We’re not leaving you. You’re right when you said that something is going on. With how Kenny went and got some of his men, I’m sure of that. Hell, maybe Levi is here to rescue your ass.”

            My heart pounded faster at the sound of his name; hope threatening to uplift this despair I was feeling. “Levi could be here?”

            “Maybe,” Ymir said. “We’ll find out soon enough. I’m lost. I have no idea where we are. We’re just running around in circles. That’s how it feels, anyway. Everything looks the same down here.”

            “That doesn’t mean we should stop,” Krista piped in. “We should keep going until we find a place to hide, or, well, we’re found.”

            Neither of those options sounded appealing, but we didn’t have much of a choice. There was nothing left for us to do. Hiding somewhere was our best course of action, at this point, but I didn’t think I’d be able to stay conscious for that much longer. It was hard to keep my eyes open, as it was. My whole body was begging me to rest, to sleep for a while. I had a feeling that, if I fell asleep, I wouldn’t be waking up again.

            “I saw a room back where we came from,” Ymir said, already walking in that direction. “We might as well take our chances in there. It’s not like we have anywhere else to go.”

            As she continued to move forward, I focused my gaze on her face, concentrating on it to keep my eyes open and my thoughts away from the pain gripping me. With every step, I held in a groan, unwilling to show them in just how much pain I was in. It was a miracle that I was able to stay awake, that I was able to fight the exhaustion that felt like a physical being that was weighing me down.

            “Up ahead,” Ymir stated. “See it?”

            Krista rushed in front of us, pushing the door open so we could move inside. The second we were passed the threshold, she closed the door, quietly cursing when she saw there was no lock on the doorknob. If Kenny was having his men check out every room, there would be nothing we could do to get away from them.

            “It’s fine,” Krista said. “We’ll be fine.”

            Ymir sighed, easing me down on the floor. It was cold. “Keep telling yourself that. As for me, I made this.” She reached into her pocket, pulling out a crude looking shank. When she saw me eyeing it, she shrugged. “I wanted to be as prepared as I could. That’s hard when you have nothing to work with. This is made out of a toothbrush, but it can cause some serious damage.”

            I turned my head to the side, once again concentrating on her face, counting back from one hundred. It didn’t work. Nothing was working. I was losing my grasp on consciousness, and that scared me more than anything else. If Levi was here, I wanted to be awake. I wouldn’t let him see me like this: weak and defenseless.

            No. Now was not the time to give into this. I made it this far, so I couldn’t give up.

            “Help me sit up,” I demanded, slurring the words together, my brain ready to clock out.

            “I really think you should rest some,” Krista said, staring down at me with worry.

            “Ymir,” I pleaded. “Please, help me. Don’t let me fall asleep. I can’t…”

            Ymir must have heard the desperation in my voice, because she pulled me up and into her arms. Unable to keep my head up, I rested it on her shoulder, trying and failing not to look at the numerous scars discoloring my skin. They stood out, as if demanding my attention. They were an angry red, too fresh and new to forget. I squeezed my eyes shut, counting back from one hundred again.

            _Please let me be able to hold out for a little longer,_ I thought. _Just a little longer…_

            Through the haze that was threatening to consume my consciousness, I heard voices and footsteps. They sounded close. With the way Ymir gripped me, causing my ribs to constrict in agony, they were a lot closer than I expected them to be. She turned her gaze to Krista, who simply leaned forward on her knees to press a kiss to her cheek.

            “Don’t you dare look at me like that,” Ymir murmured under her breath. “This isn’t a good bye. Don’t you ever say good bye to me.”

            Krista smiled sadly, uttering two words in response: “They’re coming.”

            As soon as she said it, the door flew open. After that, everything happened too fast for my brain to keep up with any of it. I knew that Ymir had set me down, because her body warmth was replaced with cold hardness. I forced my vision to focus, and all I saw in those seconds was Ymir shoving Krista to the side. All I heard was a loud, deafening noise that left nothing behind but ringing in my ears.

            _“Ymir!”_ Krista screamed. “No! Ymir, please… No, no, no.”

            When my vision focused again, I was met with red. Red on the floor. Red staining Krista’s clothes. Red pouring out of Ymir’s limp body.

            “Ymir,” I croaked, turning onto my side to get a better view. She wasn’t moving. There was a nasty looking wound on her shoulder. That’s where the blood was coming from. She had been shot.

            I lost it. So much anger flooded through me that I forgot about the useless thing that was my body and forced myself up onto my hands and knees. Everything ached, but I pushed passed that and crawled forward. I didn’t know what I was planning to do, seeing as I couldn’t do much in the state I was in, but when my eyes landed on the shank, I knew that I had to try.

            The man hovering over Ymir didn’t even pay attention to me, too focused on someone behind him. He would regret that. I’d make him regret it.

            Krista lifted her eyes to me as she finally registered the sounds of my struggling. She looked defeated, lifeless, but then her gaze dropped to what I was reaching for, and an expression of pure hatred settled on her face. She snatched up the shank before I could grab it, swinging around and bringing it down on the man’s upper thigh. He screamed out in both pain and surprise, but it didn’t take him long to whirl around and knock Krista back, grabbing hold of the front of her shirt.

            “Eren,” she shouted, sliding something over to me. The glint of the gun she had taken from the man’s holster caught my attention and I picked it up off the floor, hating how my vision was going in and out of focus.

            “Come on. Don’t give out on me now,” I muttered to myself, lifting the gun up. The man was pulling her off her feet, closing the distance between them. I couldn’t get a clear shot. They were too close…

            “Shoot him!” she yelled. “Do it now!”

            I hesitated for a second before I pulled the trigger. Krista fell to the floor in a heap, but it was only because the man had released her to clutch at his side. She didn’t waste a second in thrusting the shank into his stomach, clenching her teeth with a murderous glint in her eyes.

            “Fuck you,” she sobbed, pulling the shank out to drive it into his stomach again and again. “You killed her! You fucking killed her!”

            I leaned back to sit on my bottom, and that’s when I saw another man enter the room. I brought the gun up in time to land a bullet in his chest. When he stumbled to the floor, I stared intently at Ymir’s body, noticing the slight rise and fall of her chest. She wasn’t dead. Not yet.

            “Krista,” I said. “Apply pressure to Ymir’s wound. She’s still breathing.”

            Krista immediately abandoned what she was doing to fall to her knees in front of Ymir, sliding off her shirt to press it to her shoulder, staunching the blood flow. “She won’t last like this. We have to get her out of here.” When I didn’t answer her, she looked up at me. “Eren?”

            I didn’t want to tell her that I wouldn’t last much longer like this, either. Using the last bit of strength I had left had taken its toll on me. I was physically drained. It was impossible to keep myself upright, so I tried to lower myself to the floor, but my arm gave out mid-way and I collapsed, slamming my head against the concrete in the process.

            “Eren?” Krista said, tears staining her cheeks. “Please don’t leave me alone. Please? I can’t do this alone.”

            I couldn’t keep myself awake for a second longer. I wanted to apologize to her, to tell her that she had to fight until the end, but I didn’t even possess the strength to speak. I was leaving her defenseless, and I hated that, but there was nothing more I could do for her. She was on her own.

            And so was I.

 

\---

 

            There was no way of knowing how long I had been out, but when I came to, I was being dragged down a long corridor. I groaned, attempting to curl in on myself, but my efforts were rewarded with a swift kick to my stomach. All the air in my lungs left me in a hiss, and I coughed as I strained to breathe.

            “You’re causing me a heap of trouble.”

            I recognized that voice at once. It made the blood in my veins run cold, goose bumps rising on both my arms and legs. I didn’t have to open my eyes to know that Kenny was the one dragging me along. If anything, I wanted to avoid looking at him. I had seen enough of him to last me a lifetime.

            Realization hit me hard then, and I knew that he had taken me out of the room Ymir and Krista were in. What happened to them? Did he hurt them in order to get to me? I wanted to ask, but knew he wouldn’t give me an answer. I’d probably just get kicked again.

            “Most of my men are down,” Kenny went on, sounding agitated. “That’s because your little boyfriend is a cheat nowadays. Came with a flock of men carrying guns.” He scoffed. “If he’s not going to play fair, then neither am I. Now how about we go find him, huh? I bet he’d love to see you like this.”

            I tried to think of something that could get me out of the jam I was currently in, but another kick to my stomach made me lose my train of thought. The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth and I spat it out, the heat of it sliding down my chin. I wanted to wipe it off, but Kenny had my wrists locked in his grip.

            “Gonna keel over now?” Kenny asked, grinning down at me. “You can’t do that just yet. We wouldn’t want Levi to miss out on this, now would we? You have to be considerate, Eren. Let your boyfriend get one last good look at you before I slit your throat open.”

            The thought of Levi seeing me like this had me struggling against his hold, pulling at my wrists with whatever strength I could muster up. It wasn’t nearly enough. “Please,” I said.

            Kenny stopped dead in his tracks, dropping my hands to kneel down beside my head. “You’re begging now? You haven’t begged once since I brought you here. Don’t tell me that you don’t want Levi to see you like this? Is that it?” He gave my cheek a couple pats. “It’ll only last a second.” His eyes passed over my hand and he smiled as he reached down and pulled at the ring around my finger. “I think I’ll take this now.”

            “No,” I cried, trying to yank my hand away. “Please, not that. I’ll do anything. Just don’t take it away from me.”

            “Does it mean that much to you?” He tilted his head to the side, adjusting his hat. “I’d love to return it to you, but we have company.” He stood up straight, keeping his eyes locked on mine. “It took you long enough.”

            “Get the fuck away from him,” Levi growled.

            Levi! I couldn’t see him past Kenny. I wanted to see him. If only I could scoot up a little…

            Kenny raised his hands up to either side of him, turning around to face him. “My, my, is it just you? What happened to all the men you brought along?”

            “It’s just me.”

            What? Did that mean that everyone else was dead? No, that couldn’t be true. That meant that Farlan, Erd, and Auruo hadn’t made it. Levi had to have a plan. They weren’t really dead. They were just waiting for his signal to attack. Right?

            “This is what it comes down to,” Kenny said. “Just me and you. It’s exactly how I pictured it.” He stepped aside, revealing me.

            Levi’s eyes darted down to take in my limp form. They widened as they scanned my body. A body that was now thin, beaten, and broken. I couldn’t figure out if it was the immense pain on his face while he stared at me, or if everything I went through was finally catching up to me, but I began to cry. Little soft sobs shook my frame and I wanted everything to stop. I didn’t want to be here anymore. I didn’t want Levi to face Kenny.

            “Eren,” Levi said, his voice cracking. “I swear I’m going to get you out of here.”

            “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” That came from Kenny, who placed a foot on the center of my chest, kicking me back. “He’s not going anywhere. In fact, he’s going to die in this very corridor and you’re going to watch.”

            Levi took a step toward me, but Kenny raised his hand, wagging a finger back and forth. When Levi didn’t heed to his warning, he pressed the toe of his boot against my throat, pushing down hard enough to make me sputter up dribbles of blood. That made Levi stop, though the look he shot Kenny could have brought down an army.

            “You’re so disobedient,” Kenny commented. “What happened to my good pet?”

            “He’s dead.”

            Their voices were beginning to fade away into the background. All I could hear was the sound of my heartbeat drumming in my ears. It sounded slow, and I wondered if I would actually die here today. Even when I had been through hell since I arrived here, the thought of death never scared me, but now, now it was terrifying to think of. The truth was: I had a lot to live for.

            Dying here was unacceptable, but what could I do? There was nothing left in me. I was nothing but a sack of bones lying on this floor.

            I let my hands fall to either side of me, giving up on trying to push away Kenny’s boot from my throat. I couldn’t even remember when I started to fight. It was a natural reaction for me, but now I was tired, and if these truly were my final moments, then there was only one thing left for me to do.

            Turning my head as best I could, I made eye contact with Levi. “I love you…more than anything.” The tears running down my cheeks felt hot against my cold skin. The edges of my vision were going black and it was hard to see him now, but I knew he was there, and that’s all that mattered to me.

            “Not another step,” Kenny warned. “Don’t make me cut his final words short.”

            Levi made a noise that sounded like a broken sob. “Kenny, goddamnit, what do you want from me? Do you want me to come work for you again? If that’s what you want, then that’s what I’ll do. Just let him go.”

            To my surprise, Kenny lifted his boot off my throat, and I took in a long breath of air, uncaring of the extreme burning sensation in my lungs. “You’d come back?”

            “Yes,” Levi said. “I’ll be your fucking pet. I just don’t want you to hurt him anymore.”

            “Well, well,” Kenny murmured, “this is a shocker. You actually love this little shit that much?”

            Levi never got a chance to respond, because a loud bang interrupted him. Everything slowed down, and I watched with sick satisfaction as Kenny collapsed onto his knees, his eyes wide. He looked down at the bullet hole in his chest before the person who shot him stepped up to where he knelt.

            Krista pressed the barrel of the gun to his forehead, gritting her teeth together as she spat out the words: “Die, you shit.” She pulled the trigger again, hot blood splattering on my face.

            Kenny fell forward, and I realized he was dead. He was really dead. He wasn’t going to come back from this.

            “Eren!” Levi shouted, frantic. He was at my side seconds later, gently pulling me into his lap. “You’re okay now. I’m going to get you out of here. You’re going to be all right.” He was rocking back and forth, holding me against his chest.

            I lifted my hand to cup his cheek, feeling his warm tears against the palm of my hand. “Levi. Take me home.”

            I couldn’t stay awake long enough to hear his response.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, next chapter is going to be long. I want to cover a lot, and I also want to explain how Isabel is feeling and who died in this latest rescue mission. Yes, people died. Also, a quick reminder: Eren doesn't know that Auruo's dead yet. It'll hit him hard. :(
> 
> I can't even think of what to write, I'm so tired. I may be able to sleep tonight. Bless. 
> 
> If you haven't noticed, I've updated the number of chapters in this fic. Only 3 more to go. ಥ_ಥ
> 
> As always, thank you for reading and commenting. ❤


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, only two more chapters after this. I can't believe that I will be completing another fan fiction. Someone buy me a cake and let's celebrate together. Thank you to all who have supported me thus far. You guys are my rock!

I opened my eyes to an unfamiliar room, squinting to block the sunlight pouring in through the large window. The first thing I heard after my mind cleared some was the heart rate monitor beside the bed. It beeped every few seconds, announcing that I was still very much alive, though I felt anything but. There were so many tubes connected to each of my arms that I couldn’t even begin to figure out what they were for. No doubt they were helping me in some way, but all I could focus on was how uncomfortable they were making me. I wanted to yank them out.

            Mindful of tugging on them, I attempted pushing myself up into a sitting position, but my efforts proved futile. My arms gave out from under me, and I sagged against the mattress, too frail to lift myself up for longer than a few seconds. All I could do was lie here and listen to the insistent beating of my heart.

            Since I couldn’t sit, I turned my head to gaze at the room that I was in. It was all white, sterile and pristine. It was no doubt a hospital room, but where was everyone? Why had I woken up alone? Was this nothing more than a hallucination that my brain had concocted to comfort me after another torture session with Kenny? Was my mind playing tricks on me?

            No, that couldn’t be right. I wasn’t comfortable at all. My skin was itchy, cold sweat causing the hospital gown to cling to my chest and legs. There was also a tube taped to my inner wrist that was emitting a clear fluid straight into my veins, making my arm go cold and numb. This wasn’t a hallucination at all. It was real. It had to be. Which meant I had escaped.

            Suddenly the memories of Krista shooting Kenny flooded my mind, bringing along with them the last moments before I fell unconscious. Levi had been holding me. He was the only one there. Everyone else…

            No, I couldn’t think about that now. For once, I had to focus on myself, on my recovery. It was going to take a long time before I returned to a healthy state. Right now, I knew how I looked, and I knew how I felt: horrible. If I were to start worrying about what happened back at that place I had been imprisoned in, I would only make myself feel worse.

            As I was thinking this out, the door to my right opened up. A very tired-eyed Isabel came walking in, holding a plastic cup close to her chest. She lifted it to her lips, taking a sip of whatever was inside before her eyes raked over where I lay. When she saw that I was looking back at her, she breathed out, “Eren.”

            “Hey,” I greeted in a raspy voice that sounded nothing like my own.

            “You’re awake.” She practically slammed the plastic cup down on the over bed table, brown liquid sloshing over the sides. “Levi is going to murder me. I just convinced him to go home and shower. He’s been at your side for the last four days.”

            I’d been unconscious for four days? That would explain why my body felt as stiff as a board. “I’m glad you convinced him to go home. He needs to take care of himself.”

            “Are you thirsty? I could page a nurse.”

            I shook my head. “Give me a minute to gather myself, okay? Just stay here with me.”

            “Okay.” She pulled up the chair that had been off to the side and sat down in it, reaching out to grab my hand. “How are you feeling?”

            “Like shit.”

            “Well, you’ve been through a lot,” she said, and then let out a big sigh. “I know this isn’t the time to talk to you about what I’m thinking, but this will probably be the only chance I get before Big Bro is back. I can’t do it with him here.”

            I looked down at her, wishing I had taken the offer of her bringing me some water. My throat was unbearably dry and scratchy. “Go ahead.”

            Before she could even begin, she started to cry, tears collecting in her eyes to slowly spill over and run down her cheeks. She brought my hand up to her chest, and her body warmth seeped into my cold knuckles. “I know this is the most selfish thing I could ask of you right now, but after everything we’ve been through, I can’t hold myself back.” Her green eyes found mine. “I don’t want us to return to the underground, not ever. I know you want to avenge your mother’s death, and in order to do that, you have to end Reece, but if you go back, Levi goes back. And if he goes, so does Farlan. I just…”

            “You don’t want to lose him,” I said.

            She swallowed. “I _can’t_ lose him, Eren. I know it’s selfish to ask you to abandon your revenge, but I can’t take anymore of this. I can’t.”

            “Isabel”—I lifted my hand up to brush her tears away—“it’s not selfish.”

            “But it is,” she said. “You saved me again, and look at what it did to you! It’s all my fault, all of it, and yet I can’t even give you the one thing you asked for. I-I…”

            “I don’t want to go back either,” I told her, cutting her off.

            Her mouth dropped open a bit. “What? But what about Reece?”

            I leaned back against the pillow, exhausted. “My mom gave up her life to keep me safe. I almost died, Isabel, and I’m only seventeen years old. If she were here, she’d tell me to drop this revenge plot of mine and go be happy. And you know what would make me happy? Marrying Levi. Building a life with him. That’s all that I want.”

            “That’s what you deserve,” she said, leaning up to kiss my cheek. “I think your mom would be very proud of you right now.”

            I smiled. “I miss her like crazy.”

            “She seemed like an amazing woman, and she raised an amazing son.”

            I began to doze off, feeling oddly at peace, when I suddenly remembered something that made my blood run cold. “Gunther—did he…?” I left it at that, because I knew she would know what I was asking.

            Was he still out there?

            “That bastard is dead,” replied Isabel coldly, a faraway look in her eyes. She looked both angry and pained.

            “Are you okay?”

            Eyes snapping to my face, her strained expression relaxed when she saw me gazing at her in concern. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.” She grabbed my hand once more. “I’m really happy you’re okay, Eren, and I know that Big Bro is going to be happy too. After he kills me, that is, because he wanted to be here when you woke up.”

            “He’ll forgive you eventually.” I grinned at her, squeezing her hand. I waited until I had her full attention before I added, “Hey, I don’t regret saving you. Don’t ever think that I do.”

            She bit down on her lower lip, eyebrows knitting together. “I just got through crying, dammit.” She chuckled, wiping at her cheeks. “You’re something else, you know that? I love you, okay. I can’t even express how happy I am that you stumbled head first into our lives. Even though I do wish we would have met under different circumstances.”

            “And pass up having my ass handed over to me by Erd and Auruo? I don’t think so.” I cleared my throat, thinking about the two men who trained me since day one. “They’re all right, aren’t they?”

            They had to be…

            “Erd’s fine,” she said in a small voice, dropping her eyes.

            I clasped my hands around the edge of the white sheet covering me, digging my nails into the fabric. “And Auruo?”

            Her answer came in the form of a soft shake of her head. It was a small gesture, but it hurt me so much to see it, because it was confirmation that someone I cared about had lost their life because of me. I didn’t even want to think about how it had happened. Auruo had always been so strong, capable of handling just about anything thrown his way, so how had he met his end?

            “Tell me who else,” I said through clenched teeth.

            “Eren, right now isn’t—”

            “I want to know,” I demanded. “I want to know who else died because of me.”

            Isabel stood up before turning her back to me. She took several steps away from the bed. “Flagon, several of his men, and a girl named Ymir.”

            I could feel tears stinging my eyes, but there was something else I needed to know. “Who was hurt?”

            “Goddamnit, Eren,” she breathed, clenching her hands at her sides. “Your friend Armin—he… He’s in critical condition.”

            Time stopped the second I heard Armin’s name. No. He wasn’t supposed to be involved. He was supposed to be safe at home, far away from any of this. Why had he been there?

            “I need to see him,” I said, kicking off the sheets. “Take me to him.” I reached out and grabbed the infusion stand, using it to pull myself up. I didn’t care if I didn’t have the energy, or the strength to stand. I needed to make sure that Armin was okay. There was no way for me to do that if I continued to lie around.

            “You can’t get up, Eren.” Isabel rushed over to where I was, pressing her hands to my chest to ease me back down onto the bed.

            I tried to push her away, but I was so weak, that she barely budged. “You don’t understand! He’s my best friend. He’s been my best friend since we were kids. He wasn’t supposed to be there! Why…tell me why…” I broke down, digging the heels of my palms against my eyes as I began to sob. The pain I felt in that moment was so intense, it left me breathless.

            Several memories of Armin flashed through my mind, and with each one, my heart broke a little more. I had abandoned him, yet he stuck by my side until the very end. Why was any of this happening? The two people responsible for this were dead, but that didn’t ease this guilt. That didn’t banish away this ache that made me feel nauseous.

            The sound of the door opening made no difference to me. Neither did the feel of arms wrapping around me, or the hard chest my head was pressed against. The thing that snapped me out of it was the scent clinging to the shirt my cheek rested on: the smell of the ocean and sandalwood. Without looking up, I draped my arms around his neck, taking comfort in the soft kisses being pressed to my forehead.

            “What’s wrong?” Levi asked, his deep voice sending chills down my spine. “Are you in pain?”

            I buried my face in the crook of his neck. “I want to see Armin.”

            He inhaled sharply before his head shot to the side. “Isabel, I think it’s best if you go wait out in the hallway with Farlan.” He kept completely still until the door clicked shut several minutes later. Then he lowered me back onto the pillow, brushing the hair that fell over my eyes to the side with a gentle touch of his hand. “When you’re feeling a bit better, I’ll take you to go see him.”  

            “I don’t want to wait,” I said. “Isabel said that he’s in critical condition. What if something happens to him before I get better?” I threw my arm over my eyes. “Why was he there to begin with?”

            The bed dipped under Levi’s weight as he sat next to me, picking up my hand and holding it in both of his. “He put a tracker on Farlan’s car and followed us out there. Trust me, I never would have brought him along. I knew it was too dangerous. Still, I should have made sure that he stayed put. I’m sorry, Eren.”

            I wanted to blame this on someone, but I knew it wasn’t anyone’s fault. No, that was a lie. It was my fault. I should’ve found a way to keep him away, to keep him out of all this mess, but now it was too late. He was somewhere in this hospital suffering, and there wasn’t anything I could do to help him.

            “I know that you’re thinking of Armin right now,” Levi said, “but you’re not doing so well yourself. You need to relax. Stressing over this isn’t going to do you any good.”

            I moved my arm to the side, watching him push a button on the hospital bed remote. Within a couple minutes, a nurse came bustling in with a vital sign monitor. She was a short, hefty woman that smiled brightly at me as she neared the bed.

            “Move aside, honey,” she said to Levi, who reluctantly did as he was told. The woman regarded me. “Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. You’ve been sleeping rather peacefully these last four days. Why don’t we check your blood pressure? See how that’s doing.” She wrapped a cuff around my upper arm, paying attention to the monitor as it tightened. After a few seconds, she chirped out, “You’re doing fine in that department. Consider yourself lucky.”

            Levi moved to the other side of the bed to take my hand, holding my gaze as the nurse began to pull up the hospital gown that covered my body. She pressed on several spots around my stomach, a lick of pain erupting from my right side. I cringed, unconsciously scratching Levi’s skin.

            “Is he okay?” he asked, looking worried.

            The nurse nodded. “Everything looks good. He’s going to be sore for some time, the poor thing, but why don’t you go fetch me that pitcher over there?” She pointed to the sink in the corner of the room while she patted my shoulder. “I bet you’re thirsty.”

            I waited until she lowered the gown to speak. “Yeah.”

            After I drank down a cup of water with Levi’s help, the nurse said, “You should get some rest. That’s the doctor’s orders. I would ask you to leave”—she brought her eyes up to Levi—“but I know that’s not going to happen.” She jerked her thumb over her shoulder, pointing it at him as she looked at me. “I’ve been trying to get him out of this room for the last ninety-six hours. He wouldn’t budge an inch. He must really love you. And might I say that if two men could have a baby, you two would make a mighty fine one.”

            “O-Oh,” I stammered out, caught off guard. I could feel my cheeks burn with a blush in response to that statement. “Um, thanks?”

            She shook her head. “Don’t thank me. Thank those genes of yours. You have gorgeous eyes, and then this one over here”—she gestured to Levi—“is heaven sent. Mm. I should get on out of here before temptation settles in. I’m a married woman, after all.” She flashed me her wedding ring as she walked to the door. “Rest up now, sweetie.”

            Seeing her ring reminded me of my own, and I peered down at my left hand to see that it wasn’t on my finger. “Where’s my ring?” I asked, panicking.

            “Here.” Levi pulled it out of his pocket to slip it onto my ring finger. “I had to clean it.”

            That’s right. Kenny had taken it away from me. But at least I had it back now. That’s what counted.

            I tipped my head back to kiss him softly on the lips, smiling. “She said you were heaven sent.”

            He clicked his tongue. “Hanji hired her, so it shouldn’t surprise me.”

            “Anyone would think that, though,” I informed him. “I don’t know if you know this, but you’re pretty hot.”

            He crossed his arms over his chest, looking slightly embarrassed. “You’re doped up on pain killers.”

            “That may be true, but even if I weren’t, that wouldn’t change my opinion. Just accept the facts. You’re incredibly hot.”

            “Go to sleep,” he grumbled, covering me up. His cheeks were a soft shade of pink, and I grinned like an idiot at the sight. When he returned his attention to me, he rolled his eyes. “I will knock you out.”

            “It wouldn’t help you any. The image of you blushing is forever ingrained in my memory. It’ll be stored up here”—I tapped the side of my head with my index finger—“forever.”

            He leaned over me, giving me a menacing look, but then he touched his lips to mine, and all my worries melted away. I didn’t want to think about anything except for how it felt to be here with him right now. For the past few weeks, I thought I’d never see him again. Now here he was in my arms and I never wanted to let go.

            “Sleep,” he whispered. “I’ll take care of everything, so don’t worry about anything. Armin is receiving the best medical care out there. He’ll pull through this, so that’s why you need to focus on getting better. He’s going to want to see his best friend once he wakes up.”

            I leaned back. “Is Hanji paying for all this?”

            “Didn’t I just tell you not to worry about anything?” He lightly flicked my forehead. “She isn’t paying for a thing. She just pulled everything together. And before you ask, because I know you will, I’m paying for it. All of Kenny’s money was left to me since I was his next of kin.”

            I hated everything that had to do with that man, but if it was his money that was helping Armin, then I wouldn’t refuse it. Thinking of him clinging onto life made me feel physically ill, but it also made me think about Mikasa. How was she taking all of this? Her two best friends’ were in the hospital, so she must be on the verge of decapitating someone. It surprised me that she wasn’t here. Or was she here?

            “Where’s Mikasa?” I asked.

            Levi sighed. “She’s currently asleep on Hanji’s lap out in the ICU waiting room. She put up quite a fight. She wanted to be in the room with Armin, but they wouldn’t let her. It took both Farlan and Erd to restrain her. Farlan got a black eye for that one.”

            “That sounds like Mikasa,” I said. “But she’s okay?”

            “As okay as she can be. She was devastated when she received the news.” Of course she was. “Now you need to sleep,” he continued, pressing a button beside the bed. Warmth flooded my arm and it only took a couple of seconds for me to become drowsy.

            “You drugged me,” I slurred, the medicine already taking its effects.

            “Doctor’s orders.”

            “Levi?”

            “Hmm?”

            I grabbed his hand. “I don’t want to go back to the underground. I don’t want to pursue revenge anymore. All I want is to leave this city and go and start a life with you.” My head felt fuzzy all of a sudden, my eyelids growing heavy. It was impossible to keep them open.

            The last thing I heard before sleep overtook me was: “I love you, Eren. I’ll do anything you want.”

            Then, darkness.

 

\---

 

            I awoke to the sound of quiet sobbing. The room was pitch black, so I couldn’t see who was sitting beside me. I was about to speak when I felt pressure on my chest as the person rested their head on it. They clutched onto the front of my hospital gown, burying their face against my shoulder.

            “Don’t wake up just yet,” Isabel whispered, and I couldn’t tell if she knew I was awake or not. “I left something out earlier when I spoke to you. I didn’t know how to tell you. I don’t know how to tell anyone, so I figured I’d tell you while you were sleeping. There’s no harm in that, right?”

            I didn’t say a word, opting to stay quiet. If she wanted to confess something to me while I slept, then I would let her get it off her chest.

            “You remember the day that you went to the café to meet up with Erwin? Well, Gunther stayed behind with me. He told Erd and Auruo that he wanted to make sure I stayed safe until Hanji returned from dropping off your friends. I didn’t think anything of it. I trusted him. He was Gunther. I had known him for years.” She sobbed into my shirt and I had to resist the urge to hold her, to comfort her. “He raped me, Eren. He told me that I didn’t deserve happiness, that none of us did. I’ll never forget the look on his face… I feel so disgusting every time I think of it. I can’t make it go away.”

            My heart was pounding so hard in my chest, I was sure she could hear it. I clenched and unclenched my hands at my sides, wanting to resurrect Gunther just so I could beat him to a pulp. How could he do this to her? _Why_ would he do this to her? She hadn’t done anything wrong.

            “I don’t know how to tell Farlan,” she continued, sounding tired. “I think he might know already, though.” She went quiet, then, softly she added, “Do you think he’ll still want me after he finds out?”

            I couldn’t take this anymore. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close to me, ignoring her audible gasp. “Of course he will,” I told her. “He loves you. What happened to you wasn’t your fault. Don’t think that it takes away from the person that you are. You’re still incredible and beautiful. You’re a bright spark of life, so please don’t let Gunther take that away from you. I know it’ll take time to heal from this. I also know that Farlan will understand. He won’t push you into anything you’re not ready for. In fact, I’m pretty sure he’d wait forever for you.”

            Her whole body shook as she cried in earnest. I let her get it out. She obviously had been holding this all in since that day. If she needed me to be her shoulder to cry on, then I would be that for her.

            “Shit,” she said after some time. “I must be hurting you.” She went to lean back, but I held her close.

            “You’re fine.”

            She lay back down and stayed quiet for a long while before she spoke again. “The worst part was, after it all happened, he just took me outside and threw me in a car full of strangers. They laughed at me. They wouldn’t stop jabbing on and on about it as they drove me to Kenny. I hated them so much.”

            “If any of them are still alive,” I said, “I will gladly kill them.”

            She laughed, holding onto me tighter. “They aren’t worth it. I just want us all to get out of here. I want to leave these terrible memories behind.”

            “Me too.”

            With a heavy sigh she said, “I should go soon. Levi is probably pacing a hole in the floor by now. He didn’t want to leave you, but I have my ways of convincing him. I threatened to sing aloud.”

            Listening to Isabel’s singing was like listening to nails on chalkboard. “That would do it.”

            She scoffed, gently slapping my arm. “Whatever, asshole.”

            Before she stood up to leave, I grabbed her by the arm, needing to make sure of something. “Are you going to be okay?”

            “Eventually.”

            “You know I love you, right?”

            “Yeah,” she said in a smug tone. “We’re stuck together for life.”

            “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

            After she hugged me good-bye, she left the room, and it only took all of two seconds for Levi to come back in. He was at my side in even less time, flipping on the overhead light to scan my body. He looked so worried, that I found it kind of funny. I couldn’t help but laugh at his expression. 

            “What’s funny?” he asked, frowning.

            That made me laugh even harder, which made my side hurt. “Your face,” I got out before I dissolved into laughter again. He just looked extremely confused about the whole thing. “Oh my god, stop. My side hurts so bad.”

            “Then stop laughing.”

            “I can’t.”

            He leaned in close to me, filling my field of vision with his sharp gray eyes, causing my laughter to die away. He grazed my jawline with his fingertips, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I shivered under his fervent stare, which intensified when he pressed his lips to mine, his warm tongue gliding into my mouth. I moaned softly when he ran his fingers up my nape, tangling them in my hair.

            My heart was beating at a ridiculous pace, my body getting hot as my breath quickened. But it ended too soon.

            Levi pulled away, smirking. “Who’s blushing now?”

            “I hate you,” I mumbled.

            “That’s too bad, because I’m in love with you.”

            I groaned, covering my face with my hands. “You can’t just say that.” I was indeed blushing, which he just made worse with that last line. “Why did you kiss me, anyway?”

            “Because I wanted to,” he said. “And because it got you to stop laughing.”

            I glared at him. “I’m ignoring you for the rest of the night.”

            “Are you sure you want to? I heard there’s a blonde boy asking for you.”

            I shot up into a sitting position, my head spinning, but I didn’t care. “Armin?”

            “Yeah. Are you ready to go see him? Because he’s ready to see you.”

            “Yes, I’m ready. I was ready six hours ago.”

            “Okay, let me just call the nurse, then,” he told me. “You’re connected to too much shit.”

            As he popped his head out the door, I bit on my lower lip in anticipation and nervousness. I had been through hell, and so had my friend’s. We weren’t passed everything yet, but I knew that if I had them by my side, I would be okay. So Armin had to make it through this.

            We all had to make it through this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sobs for Ymir* *sobs for Flagon*
> 
> Next chapter will update you guys on Armin and Krista and the rest of the gang. And if you're worried about Reece, don't be. I've got my plans for him. ;)  
> At least I didn't kill off Farlan, right??? (I couldn't even if I tried. I love him too much) Whispers, "He too perf."
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sad. I can't believe there's only one chapter after this. *cries*
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, and that it gives you closure in certain areas. Although I still have to deal with Reece, but I got that all figured out, so don't think about that now. 
> 
> Anyway, go and read. :)

If someone were to ask me how it felt to see Armin lying on that hospital bed connected to a ventilator, I wouldn’t be able to describe the feeling. He looked so small and fragile, like the smallest of touches could break him. His soft features appeared unnaturally sharp, sallow skin stretched tight over his sunken cheeks. It didn’t matter how many times I shut my eyes, the sight in front of me never changed.

            Due to a broken rib, I wasn’t able to walk without experiencing severe pain in my side, so Levi insisted on pushing me over here in a wheelchair. That gave me no time to collect my thoughts before he wheeled me up to the side of the bed. I held my breath, waiting for Armin to open his eyes, but he never did.

            “The nurse said he’d probably fall asleep again,” Levi said from behind me. “The drugs he’s on make him drowsy.”

            I nodded, unable to find my voice. A lump had formed in my throat the second we stepped into the room.

            “Do you want me to leave, so you can be alone with him?”

            “No, not yet,” I said. “Give me a little more time.”

            I wasn’t given any time to recuperate from the immense amount of emotions I was feeling all at once, because the door to the hospital room flew open, and Mikasa came rushing in. Her eyes widened when she saw me, but then they darted to where Armin lay. She made a soft choking noise in the back of her throat, and I was surprised to see tears coursing down her cheeks. I had never seen Mikasa cry before, so I couldn’t help but stare.

            “Hanji said he was awake,” she murmured.

            “He was,” Levi told her, “but he must’ve fallen back asleep.”

            Without looking at me, she walked over to the side of the bed and grabbed Armin’s hand. There was something tender about the way she was gazing down at him, her normally emotionless eyes softening in affection. It made me feel like I was intruding on a private moment. For all I knew, I was. I couldn’t tell, but when she ran her fingers through his hair, I looked away.

            “Don’t…cry.” A voice so soft, it could barely be heard over the soft hissing sound of the ventilator machine.

            “Armin,” Mikasa whispered. “Don’t do that to me ever again. Don’t ever…” She couldn’t go on, her voice breaking off on a sob. She seemed to lose all her energy at once, collapsing forward in a heap of dead weight. If it weren’t for Levi’s quick reflexes, she would have landed straight on Armin, but he caught her in time and eased her down into the chair near the bed.

            “Is she okay?” I asked, worried.

            “Yeah. She’s just exhausted. She hasn’t slept much these last four days.”

            To my horror, Armin was trying to push himself up to get a better look at her. I stood up to stop him, swaying on my feet when a wave of vertigo hit me. Despite that, I managed to coax him back, broken rib be damned. Though the look Levi shot me had me sitting back down faster than I could comprehend.

            “Does anyone in here understand what severely injured means?” he said, coming to stand in front of me.

            I shrugged, smiling past the pain in my side. “Sorry.”

            “Sorry won’t cut it. If either of you pull a stunt like that again, I’m going to get a goddamn nurse in here to drug the both of you.”

            Armin chuckled softly, which caused him to wince. “I’m sorry too, Levi. Didn’t mean to.”

            “Sure you didn’t,” Levi shot back. I suddenly noticed his stance. He was standing with his hands on his hips, foot tapping on the tile floor as he glared at Armin. He looked like a worried father. That made me laugh a little too hard, which in turn made him turn around to eye me. “What now?”

            “Papa Levi,” I teased, smiling wide. “So overprotective of his children.”

            “I swear to God—”

            “We didn’t mean to make you worry, Papa Levi,” I interrupted.

            “Kids will be kids, Papa Levi,” Armin added, which surprised the hell out of me. It also caused me to laugh even harder than I already was. If I weren’t gripping my side, I swear the pain would be enough to make me cry, but I just couldn’t get over Levi’s reaction to our teasing.

            His mouth had dropped open, and he looked like he was on the verge of strangling the both of us with his bare hands. I bet if we weren’t injured, he would smack us around, but all he could do was sit there and glare daggers at us. I couldn’t handle it, but our laughter was cut short when Mikasa sat up, rubbing at her head.

            We all fell silent.

            “How are you feeling?” Armin asked when no one spoke up.

            “I’m okay in comparison to you,” she replied. “Seriously, don’t you dare worry about me. You have plenty of other things to focus on.”

            I wanted to have a deep, meaningful conversation with Armin, but in the state he was in, we couldn’t stay in his room for long. It was a miracle in itself that the nurses had allowed us this time with him. He was on strict bed rest, and having guests present meant he couldn’t get the rest his body so desperately needed for him to recover from the injuries he sustained. I could see how tired he was, though he tried to hide it.

            Before I could be whisked out of his room, I took his hand in mine. His brilliant blue eyes moved to my face, a small smile lifting the corners of his mouth. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” I told him. “I’m really sorry that this happened to you.”

            He squeezed my hand. “None of it matters anymore. What matters is that both of us are going to be okay.”

            “Yeah,” I said.

            No sooner than I got the word out of my mouth, a nurse came striding in. She held the door open for us and said, “I’m sorry, but that’s all the time I can give you with him tonight. Doctor Hahn is coming in to see how he’s doing, and you guys can’t be in here when he is, otherwise I’ll get in a lot of trouble.”

            “We’re leaving,” Levi stated with a nod of his head, grabbing the handgrips of the wheelchair. “Thank you for allowing us in here, in the first place.”

            She smiled, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. She waved off his comment. “It’s nothing.”

            I took that as my cue to tell Armin good night, and even though my rib was in agony, I stood up to give him a quick hug. Mikasa did the same, and then we were both ushered out of the room. It was as Levi began pushing me down the hallway that Mikasa asked, “Can I have a moment alone with Eren?” She didn’t make eye contact with either him or me.

            Levi glanced at me, making sure that I was okay with being left alone with her, and I gave a quick nod of my head. He left us alone without saying another word after that. When I could no longer see him, the hallway seemed impossibly big and empty. Mikasa must have felt the tension growing between us, because she was quick to start pushing me in the direction of my room.

            For a long while, she didn’t speak, and when she did, her voice was barely above a whisper. “I’m sorry.”

            I kept looking ahead of me, ignoring the nurses passing by us. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

            “Yes, I do,” she said. “You’ve been in the hospital for the last four days, and I haven’t even visited you.” She sighed. “I was really angry. I kept thinking about how you left Trost without telling Armin and me, and how you willingly gave yourself up for Isabel without a passing thought about the two best friends you were leaving behind. Do you even realize how much that hurt us? We just got you back, and then you were gone again.”

            “Mikasa—”

            “I don’t want to lose you and Armin, Eren. You two are like my family.”

            “You won’t lose me,” I said.

            “That’s what you keep saying, yet you continue to put yourself in danger.”

            I put my hands on the wheels, effectively stopping her pushing. I turned the wheelchair around to face her. “I’m done putting myself in danger. I can’t keep doing it. I mean, look at me, Mikasa. How much more of this do you think I can take?”           

            Her eyes narrowed into slits. “I don’t know, Eren. You never seem to consider your well being before you jump into danger to help someone.”

            I couldn’t even argue with her on that one. Before Kenny had taken me, I didn’t care about the consequences of my actions, so long as it meant saving a life. I admit that that part of me would never completely go away, but after being on the brink of death, I couldn’t help but grasp onto the second chance I had been given. I wasn’t going to waste it.

            “I want to live for myself,” I whispered, thinking of all the times my mom had told me that continuously getting beaten up for others wasn’t living. I think I was finally beginning to understand what she meant. “I want to be happy. I realize now that I wasn’t happy all those times I came to someone’s rescue. I just kept thinking that if someone had helped my dad, he would still be alive, but what I failed to see was that no matter how many people I helped, it wasn’t going to bring him back.”

            “Eren, do you regret helping people?”

            I shook my head, trembling. “No, it’s not like that. I’m glad that I helped as many people as I did. What I regret is overlooking my own safety. I regret not caring whether I lived or died. But I care now.” I smiled. “I have so much to live for.”

            “You do,” she said, kneeling down in front of me. She wiped away my tears, cupping my face. “I love you so much, Eren. Your life has always been precious to me. I’m so happy that you’re realizing your life is worth so much.”

            I had never been one to show emotion. Neither was Mikasa. But these past few weeks had given me a newfound appreciation for everyone in my life, for all those that had stuck around despite all the things I had done. So, without a second thought, I wrapped my arms around her and said, “Thank you for not giving up on me.”

            She stroked my hair. “I’ll never give up on you. Not ever.”

            I didn’t know how long we stayed there hugging each other, but it must’ve been long enough to make Levi worry, because he backtracked and came in search of us. When he found me wrapped up in Mikasa’s arms, he stood back to give us our privacy, but I held my arm out to him, gesturing for him to come over.

            “I don’t do hugs,” he said from where he stood, crossing his arms over his chest.

            I turned my head, glaring at him through narrowed eyes. “Get your ass over here.”

            He raised an eyebrow at me, looking amused at the tone I had used. “Come again?”

            “Get over here,” I demanded, pointing to the ground beside me. “Right here.”

            He came over, but stopped short of where I had pointed. “Someone’s bossy today.”

            “Yeah,” I said, “so give me a damn hug.”

            Mikasa sidestepped before he leaned down and hugged me. I eyed her over his shoulder, but she shrugged. “I don’t do hugs,” she repeated, smirking when Levi shot her a death glare.

            “You guys are so much alike,” I commented. They both scowled at me for that one, but I just laughed and added, “Take me back to my room. I’m tired as hell.”

  

* * *

 

I couldn’t deny the fact that leaving the hospital was one of the best feelings in the world. I was incredibly overcome with happiness as I was pushed out the front double doors, the brisk air caressing my face. I took a deep breath, focusing on the pale blue sky and not the pain that erupted in my side. My rib would heal eventually. The doctor told me it would take a couple more weeks.

            The only thing that had put a damper on today was that Armin wasn’t getting discharged with me. The gunshot wound to his shoulder had caused him to lose a lot of blood, so his body still needed time to recover from the trauma. Still, he was no longer in critical condition, which was the best news someone could’ve given me during my long hospital stay.

            “My eyes,” Levi deadpanned, drawing my attention to him.

            I didn’t know what he was talking about until I looked up to see Isabel and Farlan jump apart. She flushed scarlet, avoiding eye contact at all costs, while Farlan just grinned like a moron. I gave him a thumbs up, which earned me a pout and a glare from Isabel.

            “Take care of my girl,” I told him. “I’ve got a shotgun that I’m not afraid to use.”

            Farlan laughed. “Do I at least get a head start before you shoot my ass off?”

            “Afraid not,” I said.

            “God, shut up,” Isabel mumbled, embarrassed by our conversation.

            I batted my eyelashes at her. “Now you know how it feels.”

            “Ugh, I guess I do. Now please spare me, because I’m pretty sure my face is about to burn right off.”

            I grinned. “I know the feeling.”

            Levi ignored all of us and continued to push me toward the car Farlan had parked under the designated covered area where patients were dropped off and picked up. He went to pull the backdoor open when I reached out and tugged on his arm. He stopped what he was doing to glance down at me, but quickly turned his head to the right when he noticed that I was looking off in that direction.

            Krista stood a little ways from our car, hands clasped in front of her. She looked uncomfortable and nervous as I stared at her like she would up and disappear from view. But I couldn’t help it, because I hadn’t seen her since everything happened. I couldn’t even blame her for not coming sooner. She had a lot to cope with, including her girlfriend’s death.

            “I’ll be back,” I said, grabbing hold of the wheels to maneuver myself toward her.

            When I reached her, she said, “Is it all right if I snag a couple minutes of your time?”

            “It’s more than all right.” I pointed to a small rest area beside the front entrance. “Let’s go sit over there.”

            Even after she sat down on the stone bench, she kept quiet. It was almost like she was working up the nerve to speak. “Me and Erwin are going to get out of this city,” she said at last, gripping the edge of the bench. “We both wanted to wait until you were discharged. I think he’ll always feel responsible for you getting wrapped up in Kenny’s sick games.”

            “It wasn’t his fault.”

            She nodded, dropping her head back to release a heavy sigh. It took her a long while to talk once again, and when she did, she sounded like she was in a lot of pain. “Being without Ymir hurts more than I ever could’ve imagined. I never thought I’d have to live without her, yet here I am. I sort of hate myself for being able to breathe without her.” She looked over at me. “She never woke up after being shot. I wanted to give up when her heart stopped beating, because how could someone that strong die? I wanted to lie down next to her and forget about the world, but when I heard Kenny, I went and hid.”

            “And you shouldn’t feel guilty for that,” I told her.

            “I couldn’t even feel guilty, because I was too busy feeling stupid. I left the damn gun on the floor, but Kenny was too consumed in hauling you off to notice me hiding beside that filing cabinet. He just dragged you out and every part of me wanted to stay there and throw in the towel, but then I saw Ymir lying there and it made me so angry.” She curled her fingers in toward her palms, nails biting into her skin. “I hated him for bringing us to that hell. I hated him for not even batting an eye when he saw her corpse. I just wanted him dead. I wanted to watch him die. It was the only thing I wanted.”

            I put my hand on her shoulder, offering her as much comfort as I could. She relaxed under my touch, her rigid posture giving way. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do anything.”

            She shook her head, rubbing at her eyes. “It wasn’t your fault. You were barely holding on, and when I saw you lying there in front of Kenny, I thought you weren’t going to make it.”

            “But I did make it,” I said. “And so did you.”

            “Yeah. We’re both alive.”

            We lapsed into silence and I watched cars drive in and out of the pick up area. Then my eyes drifted off toward Levi, who was leaning up against the car that Hanji had more or less given Farlan. It was a silver Toyota Camry, a family car, as she had put it. It made me smile to think that one day I could have a little family with Levi. That led me to think of him as a father.

            He would make a great one.

            I regarded Krista once again, noting the faraway look in her eyes. “Thank you,” I said.

            She looked at me as if she were coming out of a dream. “For what?”

            “For saving my life. For not leaving me behind, even though I asked you to. It’s because of you and Ymir that I’m here today, and I can’t thank you enough for that.”

            She smiled, reaching out to cup her hands over mine. “There’s no need to thank me for that. You deserve happiness after everything you’ve been through, and I can tell that those people over there”—she gestured to Isabel, Farlan, and Levi—“make you happy.”

            “They do,” I said, going quiet for a moment. Then I slipped my hands out from beneath hers to reverse the roles. I waited until she was looking at me to add, “You deserve happiness, as well.”

            She swallowed, eyes getting watery once again. “I know, and I hope that one day these memories won’t cripple me with pain, but…I’m going to need some time.”

            “Of course. That’s understandable.”

            Leaning forward, she kissed me on the cheek before rising to her feet. “I should get going. Erwin is waiting for me.”

            “Okay.” I wheeled myself beside her until we reached the parking lot. As she stepped off the curb, I got a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that made me reach out and snatch her hand. When she tilted her head down to look at me, I said, “Let’s keep in touch.”

            She grinned, squeezing my fingers. “I’d like that.” She produced a small notepad and pen from her purse, holding them in front of her to jot something down. Afterwards, she tore off the yellow paper and handed it to me. “That’s my cell phone number. You can reach me there.”

            I took it from her. “I’ll call you, and I’m not just saying that.”

            “I know you aren’t,” she said. “I’m happy that you’re okay, Eren. I mean that.”

            “I’m happy you’re okay, too.”

            After we said our good-byes, I sat there for a while, just taking in my surroundings. The sun warmed my face, and though the scars of what I had been through remained on my skin, I felt free of them. I didn’t want to be tied to Kenny in any way, so letting him drag me down by the memories of what he had done to me was unacceptable to me. He couldn’t hurt me anymore. He had failed in breaking me, and I would prove that every day I continued living.

            As I was consumed in thoughts, cool fingers slipped beneath my chin, coaxing my face up. I closed my eyes, smiling when soft lips brushed across my cheek. This is what it felt like to be alive, and I wanted to keep feeling like this for the rest of my life. I wanted to wake up every day and do meaningless tasks. I wanted to work at a crappy job, go to the movies with friends, eat at restaurants, and laugh at stupid jokes, because that was living.

            And I wanted to live.

            So when I opened up my eyes and gazed into steel gray ones, I said, “Let’s buy a house together.”

            “Are you itching to make this permanent?” Levi said playfully, smirking.

            “Yes,” I responded in a serious tone. “I want to do forever with you, Levi. I want to do cheesy things with you, like paint our mailbox a hideous color to aggravate the neighbors. I want to do normal things, too, like drool over you while you’re mowing the lawn shirtless. I want to do everything with you.”

            “As if I’d mow the lawn shirtless.” He scoffed, but smiled down at me. “I want all that with you, as well, Eren. So marry me already.”

            I leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. “I’m just waiting for you to set a date.”   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll forever be cheesy at heart. Oh well. 
> 
> I can't wait to write the last chapter. I've already envisioned it, and it's going to be so beautiful and long and lovely. At least I hope it will. Also, I'll be addressing Reece in that chapter, as well. Let's hope I don't disappoint you there. Although I feel happy with how I'm going to put it. 
> 
> But seriously, I always get emotional toward the end of a story. I'm both sad and happy that this fic is coming to an end. I should stop now before I start blabbering. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, for sticking around, and for just being amazing! You guys supported me from the very beginning and I feel incredibly grateful for that. :)


	35. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I was going to have something profound to say at this point, but I just feel incredibly happy right now. I spent the last two days writing this chapter and it was so clear in my mind, that it feels like I was there. I'm just…happy. I feel like I do when I finish reading an amazing book, and that's saying a lot.
> 
> So, here it is, the final chapter of The Thug.

_Two years later, on Eren’s 19 th birthday_

 

According to the alarm clock on the bedside table, it was 6:02 a.m. when I woke up to the feel of warm hands sliding beneath the front of my shirt. I sighed in content, closing my eyes once again. I knew who was lying behind me, recognized the familiar lips that were leaving a trail of kisses down the back of my neck. I would bask in the moment while I could, because if Isabel ever caught wind of this, she would have both our heads on a silver platter.

            “You’re cheating,” I mumbled sleepily.

            Levi traced the V of muscle of my lower abdomen with light, teasing touches. “I don’t care.”

            I rolled over to face him, brushing the hair that fell over his eyes to the side. “How did you even manage to get in here? I thought Isabel all but bolted the doors shut so you couldn’t see me before the ceremony.”

            “She left one of the windows open.”

            I imagined him climbing in through the window and smiled. “You wanted to see me that badly?”

            He pecked along my jawline in response. “It’s been two days. Isabel is taking this whole thing too far. Who cares if we see each other before the ceremony? It’s not bad luck. The only reason that custom happened is because back when marriages were arranged, they didn’t want the groom to see the bride just in case he didn’t find her attractive and would change his mind about marrying her.”

            “Really? I never knew that.”

            “It’s true,” he said, sliding his hands around to the small of my back. “And, as you can see, I’m not going to change my mind about marrying you, so stop worrying.”

            I brought my hand up to place it on his hip, pushing the fabric of his shirt aside to feel his smooth skin. “It’s not me who’s worrying. Isabel wants us to have a traditional wedding. She’s even doing that whole ‘something old, something new’ thing.” I bit down on my bottom lip when he slipped his hands into my pajama bottoms, brushing his fingertips along my inner thigh.

            “I’ll leave before she wakes up, then. She won’t even know I was here.”

            I hummed in agreement, wanting him to stay. “You better be quiet.”

            “I’m always quiet,” he whispered back, pulling my bottoms down my legs and over my ankles. “It’s you who isn’t quiet.”

            I rolled onto my back to help him. “I’ll try to be.”

            “Good luck with that. You’re always so loud.” The bed squeaked as he sat back on his heels to take off his shirt. I ran my hand down his chest once it was free of the material, snapping the elastic band of his boxer-briefs against his skin when I reached them. “Do you have lube in here, or did Isabel throw that away, too? It wouldn’t surprise me.”

            Turning onto my side, I pulled open the drawer of the bedside table, moving stuff aside until I spotted the small plastic bottle. “Here.” I handed it to him, lying back to gaze at every inch of his body as he slipped off his underwear. When he opened the cap of the lube, I said, “Quietly.”

            “Very quietly,” he agreed.

            Feeling his fingers move down my thigh, I glanced up at him and watched his face. He looked focused, eyebrows knitting together as he began to prepare me. I ran my hands up his arms, sighing when I felt his finger slide into me.

            Leaning over, he whispered, “We’re doing this out of order.”

            “I don’t mind,” I replied.

            “Me neither.”

 

\---

 

            Isabel hadn’t woken up, even after Levi more or less welded the front door shut when he closed it. She was still happily asleep when I walked into her room at 7:45 in the morning, curled up in a ball amidst a sea of pillows and blankets. Her vibrant red hair was poking out from under a teal and brown quilt that Farlan had bought her when she stared at it fondly for all of fifteen minutes. She looked far too comfortable beneath it. I doubted she would wake up on her own anytime soon.

            Carefully, as to not disturb her, I lay down next to her. Her face was all scrunched up, like she had smelt something bad. When I pressed a finger between her eyebrows, the muscles of her face relaxed and she smiled in her sleep.

            The ceremony was at two, and it would take me about half an hour to get ready, and another forty-five minutes to get to the venue. That left me with six hours and thirty minutes to kill. So I didn’t rush to wake anyone else up. Mikasa and Armin were asleep in the other room, while Farlan and Erd were at Hanji’s place, because they were on the groom’s side.

            I was falling back asleep when someone came waltzing into the room. That someone was none other then Farlan, who also wasn’t allowed to come over until after the ceremony.

            I grinned at him. “You cheater,” I accused.

            He jumped up, startled to see me lying next to Isabel. “Eren? I thought—no wait…”

            “Save it,” I told him. “I cheated, too.”

            “ _You did what_?” Out of nowhere, Isabel hopped on top of me, yanking the collar of my shirt down. Her eyes went wide when she saw a fresh hickey coloring my neck. “I’m going to cut Big Bro’s lips right off. He’s lucky you’re wearing a tux that will cover that up, but that’s no excuse for this. You’re both in trouble.”

            I laughed at her word choice. “Consider it my birthday gift.”

            She shook her head. “Oh, no. Don’t try pulling that card with me. I bought you a birthday gift.”

            “My wedding gift, then,” I offered.

            “No. Just get up. The first thing on today’s to-do list is to eat a balanced breakfast, so get your ass into the kitchen, so I can prepare the best goddamn meal you’ve ever tasted in all your days.” Farlan put his hand over his mouth, muffling his laughter. She glared at him. “Are you doubting my cooking skills?”

            He shook his head right away. “Nope. I wouldn’t dare do that.”

            “That’s what I thought,” she said, walking up to him to jab at his chest with her pointer finger. “I make a mean omelet, and if you say otherwise, I will hold out for a good two weeks.”

            “Did I say that you didn’t make a mean omelet?” He looked at me. “Did I ever say that, Eren?”

            “No you did not,” I stated. “I never once heard you say that.”

            Isabel huffed. “That’s right, because my omelets are the best.”

            He wrapped his arms around her waist, leaning down to kiss her cheek. “Yes, your omelets are the best, Mrs. Church.”

            She blushed so hard at the title, that I was sure her cheeks would be stained a permanent red, but then she threw herself at him, and I was quick to leave the room after that. I was not about to stay to see clothes being torn off, which they had been doing a lot of since they got married three months ago. I didn’t mind. They were both incredibly happy.

            Leaving them alone, I made my way out to the kitchen, spotting Armin leaning up against the counter with a cup of coffee in his hand. When he saw me, he smiled.

            “Today’s the big day,” he said. “Are you nervous?”

            I thought back to this morning, to the way it felt to be wrapped up in Levi’s arms, and shook my head. “No. I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time now.”

            “You have.” He set his mug down on the counter to pour me a cup. As he handed it to me, he asked, “Is there a reason why you guys set the date on the day you were born?”

            “Well, Levi’s birthday is on Christmas, so we have to celebrate both on the same day. Now we can celebrate both our wedding anniversary and my birthday on the same day. It sort of evens things out.” I took the turquoise mug he held out to me and sipped on the sweet coffee inside. I didn’t think I could consume anything else. Though I wasn’t nervous about marrying Levi, I was a little bit anxious about reciting the vows. It was going to be a small gathering, all family and friends, but that didn’t make me any better at speaking in public.

            Armin picked up his mug again. “I guess it does.”

            While we were lost in thought, Mikasa came striding in with a look of distaste on her face. I gave her a questioning look, but she just jerked her thumb over her shoulder and I understood what she was referring to.

            Farlan and Isabel weren’t exactly quiet when it came to these things.

            So I couldn’t really contain my laughter when she came into the kitchen awhile later sporting some rather crazy sex hair. She didn’t even take notice in Mikasa gawking at her, or Armin snickering under his breath. She was far too absorbed in the task of opening the cupboard door to retrieve a frying pan.

            A couple minutes after Isabel came in, Farlan did. It took him all of five seconds to notice what we were staring at. Then he darted over to where Isabel stood and gently tugged out the scrunchie from her hair to run his fingers through it. When it was all smoothed out, he redid her ponytail and kissed the top of her head.

            “I think that’s about the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” I said. “I ship you guys together.”

            Isabel turned to me. “Ship us together? What the hell does that even mean?”

            “It means I like that you guys are in a romantic relationship.”

            She snorted. “I ship you and Levi, then.”

            Mikasa rolled her eyes, plucking the mug out of Armin’s hand. “It’s too damn early for this.” She drank down the last of his coffee before heading out of the kitchen.

            “Sour puss!” I called after her.

            “Fuck you, too!” she called back, and then added, “Happy Birthday, douchebag!”

            After that, Isabel got to making us all omelets. I could only eat half of mine, but downed another cup of coffee, which I regretted almost immediately. My head was spinning by the time Isabel instructed me to go shower like I never showered before. It was a miracle that I managed to keep my breakfast down.

            When I was through showering, Mikasa sat me down in the master bedroom. She stood in front of me, eyeing my hair for a good while before she began to rummage through a huge black bag she had brought in with her. Then, turning back to me, she started to comb it just so.

            While she worked on my hair, Isabel pulled out the tux I would be wearing today, setting it down with care on the swoop armchair that stood in the corner of the room in all its glory. It was an ugly old thing, but Isabel fell in love with it when she spotted it in a vintage store down on Maine Street. She narrowed her eyes while gazing at my suit, brushing off nonexistent specks of dust on the lapels, smiling with satisfaction when she was done with the job.

            “You’re going to look so hot,” she commented. “Levi is going to cream his pants when he sees you.”

            I sputtered. “I doubt that.”

            Mikasa smacked my forehead. “Don’t doubt it. You’re going to look sexy when I’m through with you.”

            “He’s already sexy,” Isabel said. “Which means you’re going to look _sexier,_ Eren. Get the fans, because we’re all going to need them.”

            I rolled my eyes at her. “You’re a married woman.”

            “I am.” She wiggled her hand at me, displaying the ring on her finger. “But that does not mean I can’t admire my future brother-in-law.”

            From then on, time seemed to slip by at an unbearably fast pace. My stomach was churning when Isabel coaxed my limbs into a white-button up shirt. My fingers were useless, shaking things, so she took it upon herself to button me up. When she went into the other room to grab my dress shoes, Armin took one good look at me, and then made his way over with the suit jacket, holding it out for me.

            “Deep breaths,” he said.

            I put my arm in the sleeve, breathing raggedly. “What the hell happened? I was fine thirty minutes ago. Now I feel like I’m about to collapse.” Please, no. I offered up a silent prayer to whatever God would listen. I did not want to embarrass myself, but more than that, I didn’t want to keep Levi waiting.

            “You’ll be fine,” Armin said in a soothing tone. “Just keep breathing.”

            I did just that.

 

\---

 

** Levi **

 

            I stood in the middle of a small room located somewhere inside the venue, Farlan right by my side. I hadn’t stopped pacing for the last twenty minutes or so, no matter how many times he tried to convince me to sit down. I couldn’t stop even if I wanted to, my legs had a mind of their own, and they in no way wanted me to take a seat.

            “Levi?” Farlan said.

            “Huh?” I squeaked.

            He looked at me like he had just witnessed pigs flying. “Did you just squeak? _You?_ ”

            “Shut up,” I groaned. “I’m nervous as hell right now. And why is it so fucking hot in here? Open the damn window.”

            “It’s not hot.” He walked over to the window, lifting it up to let cool air into the musty room. “You’ve just been pacing for too long.”

            I clasped my hands behind my back, thinking of Eren. He had to be in better shape than I was. He had told me that he wasn’t nervous at all. Then again, I hadn’t been nervous up until I arrived at the venue. Then all the nerves caught up to me, making me into this hopeless mess.

            Farlan came up to me, placing his hands on my shoulders. I stopped walking to look up at him. He had this brilliant smile on his face, pale-blue eyes almost sparkling. “Once you see him, Levi, all the nerves will melt away, and you’ll feel nothing but this intense happiness, because you’re marrying the love of your life.”

            “Is that how you felt with Isabel?”

            He nodded once. “Yeah. I just couldn’t believe how beautiful she looked, and how she was about to marry _me_ , some grimy, washed-up thug from the underground.”

            “She’s loved you for a long time,” I told him. “And you’re a good man.”

            “Heh, I guess, but I still feel lucky as hell to have her.”

            “You better feel lucky,” Isabel said, bursting through the door. She was wearing a pale-green, one shoulder dress that accentuated her tan skin and lively green eyes. She looked gorgeous, which made it less surprising to see Farlan practically drooling over her. “Are you guys ready? The ceremony starts in fifteen minutes.”

            “I’m ready,” I said. “How’s Eren?”

            “Shitting bricks,” she replied, “but he’ll be okay. What about you?”

            My palms were sweaty, my heart was pounding fifty miles per hour, and I was more than sure that my knees were basically there just for show now, but I responded with: “I’m fine.”

            “Sure you are,” she said with a smirk. “That’s why you look like you’re about to puke out your guts.”

            “Isabel,” Farlan hissed. “That’s not helping.”

            I held up my hand to shut them both up. “I’m good. Let’s go.”

 

\---

 

** Eren **

 

What was air again? Were you supposed to inhale it to get it into your lungs? Because I swear I forgot how that worked. I needed help. Someone needed to call 911. This was an emergency situation.

            “I don’t remember how to breathe,” I declared matter-of-factly to the small group fussing over my appearance.

            Armin patted my back as if that would help me get over this dilemma. “You’re breathing right now. Look.” He pointed to my chest. “See. Breathing.”

            “I need to sit down,” I said, pushing past everyone to all but leap into a chair located in the back of the room I was now in. This was the Bride’s room at the vintage venue we were having the wedding ceremony at. Since there weren’t two rooms for two grooms, this was what I was stuck with. Not that I was even worried about that at a time like this.

            Getting married should come with an instruction manual that told you exactly what to do, and when to do it. Hell, it should have pictures that showed you how you were supposed to look at certain times, and it should definitely remind you how to breathe. Yes, there was that, because how else was I supposed to make it through the rest of the day when I couldn’t even do something as simple as that?

            Answer me that question right now.

            While I was having a mental breakdown, Isabel came hurrying into the room. “Is everyone ready to go? Everything’s about to start.”

            “Eren is having a moment,” Mikasa said. She looked breathtaking in her bridesmaid’s dress, her black hair pulled back into an elegant bun.

            Isabel’s eyes flicked to my face. “Eren, pull yourself together, because Levi is waiting.”

            It was the one thing anyone could have said to get my ass into gear. I forced myself to a stand, feeling determined.

            “I’m ready.”

 

\---

 

** Levi **

 

I stood under an orchard-covered arch, my heart hammering in my chest. I didn’t pay attention to any of the guests sitting under a canopy of lights, or the one priest in twenty states who would perform a same-sex marriage. All I was keeping focus on was the area Eren would be walking in through.

            It felt like a small eternity had passed by the time the music started up. I straightened up, turning to face the guests. Beside me, Farlan, my best man, did the same. We both waited.

            The first to enter were Hanji and Erd. They were all smiles. After them came Armin and Mikasa. Armin was smiling like a proud father, while Mikasa had no expression whatsoever. That wasn’t a shocker, considering she hardly smiled at any given time.

            I waited for them to walk to their assigned spots before I focused my gaze on the entrance again. The music changed, signaling that the bride, or in this case, the other groom, was about to enter. I attempted to compose my rather erratic heartbeat, but it only picked up speed when Eren walked in.

            He looked shaky, but when he lifted his eyes to find mine, he smiled triumphantly. My heart stopped. It must have, because the music died away, and everyone else no longer existed. It was just him and those brilliant green eyes that never once looked away from me.

            From the moment I saw him in that alleyway all those years ago, I knew there was something about him that I wouldn’t be able to shake, but I never, not even in my wildest dreams, thought that he would hold the key to my future. He was everything and more, far too good for me, but today he would become my better half.

            In a haze, I lifted my hand up to grasp onto the brass key he had given me. It felt cool against my palm, a reminder that this was really happening. When Eren saw what I was holding onto, his eyes softened.

            _Thank you for giving me this key, Eren,_ I thought as he took his rightful spot beside me. _Thank you for seeing something in me that you thought was worth fighting for._

 

\---

 

** Eren **

 

            There was no one else in the room but him. All the nervousness I had felt moments ago had vanished the second I laid eyes on him. Breathing became simple, and I wondered how I could ever forget. This wasn’t something to be anxious about. I wanted this. I wanted this from the moment Levi had proposed to me back at Hanji’s house two years ago.

            He was my past, my present, and my future.

            So when the priest began to recite the opening words, I placed my hands in his, and I couldn’t be more sure about whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

            When it came time to say our vows, I repeated what the priest said and it never once occurred to me that I was speaking aloud in front of a group of people. All that mattered was that Levi looked happy, and that I felt the same way.

            “May I have the rings?” the priest asked, and Armin stepped up and placed them in the palm of his hand. He held them out to Levi, who grabbed one of the tungsten wedding bands. “Repeat after me: I, Levi, give you, Eren, this ring as an eternal symbol of my love and commitment to you.”

            Levi took my hand in his. “I, Levi, give you, Eren, this ring as an eternal symbol of my love and commitment to you.” He slipped the ring on my finger, and I wanted to cry.

            My voice was wobbly when I repeated the same words, slipping the corresponding wedding band onto Levi’s finger.

            “By the power vested in me,” the priest stated in a booming voice, “I now pronounce you married. You may now seal this union with a kiss.”

            Levi leaned in and kissed me very softly, like I was something delicate and precious. I smiled against his lips, unbelievably happy.

            “I present to you Mr. and Mr. Ackerman.”

            Levi smiled so brightly, that I about fainted right then and there, but then he took my hand and led me down the aisle, our friends and family whooping and cheering as they threw confetti over us, and I felt grounded.

            I felt complete.

 

\---

 

            By the time the reception was nearly over, I was exhausted. I had danced the night away, had cut and eaten a piece of my wedding cake, had thrown the garter Isabel made me wear beneath my suit, and now I was more than ready to go back to the house we shared with Isabel and Farlan, but Erd had different plans for me. He had whisked me off toward the dance floor once again, and I let him, because I was too tired to protest.

            “Are you up for some news about the underground?” he asked as we began to dance.

            That woke me right up. “Good or bad?”

            After Levi had left the underground, Erd had offered to take over as leader of his gang. Since Levi trusted him implicitly, he had no trouble handing over the responsibility to him. Everything had gone well with his men, too. They accepted Erd without any argument, not only because they trusted him, but also because Levi had provided them all with enough money to last them for years to come. They wouldn’t go another day without food.

            “Good,” Erd said. “It’s about Reece.”

            I looked up at him. “Tell me.”

            “It took his men a while, but after they saw the treatment Levi’s old gang was getting, they turned against him. Some of them decided to come over to my territory to join me, but Reece killed them off. After that, the rest of his men overthrew him. Hung him up on a lamppost and left him for dead. Some of them came back each day to torture him until he gave out, but I was the one to deliver the final blow on your behalf. I made sure he died slowly and painfully for what he did to your mother.”

            It felt like an immense weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I clung onto him for support. I thought of my mom, and the gruesome death she had endured, and I felt grateful that the man who had caused her that pain was finally gone from this world. “Thank you,” I whispered.

            “It was nothing he didn’t deserve.”

            “I know.”

            He leaned back, smiling. “Congratulations on your marriage, Eren. I’m happy for you guys, but I think your husband wants to cut this dance short.” He jerked his chin to the right, and I followed the direction with my eyes.

            Levi stood off to the side, and when he saw me staring at him, he crooked his finger, beckoning me over.

            “I better go,” I said. “Thank you for being here today, Erd.”

            “It was my pleasure.”

            I walked up to my husband and he grabbed my hand, leading me out of the room. I didn’t ask any questions. If this was how he wanted to leave the reception, then I was all for it. It felt like I was asleep on my feet, after all.

            When we made it outside without any trouble, he stopped to pull something out of his pocket. “I haven’t given you your birthday present yet,” he said. “Close your eyes.” I did what he asked. “When you left the hospital, you wanted to buy a house together. Do you remember that?” I nodded, smiling. “A couple months ago, we passed by a house that was for sale and you liked it so much, you had us stop and look at it. What if I told you that I bought that house that very day?”

            My cheeks were going to split open with how wide I was smiling. “Did you?”

            “Open your hand.”

            I did, and he placed something cold and hard in my palm. I opened my eyes to gaze down at the small silver key. “It’s really our house?”

            “Yes.”

            Overcome with excitement, I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. I kissed every inch of his face. “I love you.”

            He took my face in his hands, staring straight into my eyes. “I love you, too, Eren. Always.”

            I was so happy. Everything was right. There was nothing I wanted to add to this day, and nothing that I wanted to take away.

            Today was absolutely perfect.

            “Let’s go to our house,” I told him.

            He laced our fingers together, and we walked hand in hand to our tin can covered car to drive toward our awaiting home and begin our journey together as a married couple.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, my growth as a writer is sometimes baffling to me, because when I first sat down to write a fan fiction, I quite literally couldn't write anything longer than twenty pages on Microsoft Word. Now, here I am, 246 pages later and I feel at peace with myself, because I've accomplished this. I can't thank you guys enough for always being there for me, for leaving me encouraging and lovely comments, and for just being downright amazing people. 
> 
> People always question my love for Ereri, but I will forever smack them away, because Ereri has brought me so much. It has brought me friends, joy, and this major growth as a writer. This couple, fictional or not, will forever hold a special place in my heart. I'm so damn emotional right now. Omg. Could you tell?! I feel so happy. I can't even put it into words. 
> 
> Just thank you! Thank you for reading, for enjoying this story of mine, and for sharing the same love for this beautiful damn couple.


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